Lori Alexander learning less than ever- Part 7

[happy atheist]

On April 14, 2016 at 0:04 AM, molecule said:

I was telling my husband today about Lori, trying to give him a general idea about her so he had some background for something I wanted to tell him about today's post. When I said that her usual comment was her whole "ten minutes and lube" shtick, he said her husband obviously didn't know what he was doing and should be embarrassed by his wife's blog.

When I told my husband about her he said, "Maybe people shouldn't ask for sex advice from someone who clearly doesn't like sex."

 

[polecat]

3 hours ago, usmcmom said:

Okay. I just have to ask.  In that second picture up there ^^^ is she wearing a brown silk teddy? Camisole? Negligee?  Is that a post-coital photo?

Just wondering how she can be wearing a bra under that thing AND...you know...how that is a modest piece of clothing. 

 

I really think she just doesn't wear bras. 

[Koala]

Another instance where Lori was confronted with abuse and showed absolutely no sympathy:

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He yells at me and calls me names. He tells me regularly how disgusting I am. He yells at me when I'm holding our baby and am asking him to please wait until the baby is in bed. He tells me how everybody else thinks that I am boring and how friends are only ever being polite to listen to me. He tells me all the time how lucky I am to have him, because nobody else would want me because I am a useless wife, usually because I haven't cleaned the house to his standards. The first year of our baby's life, he got up 0 times in the night to take care of her. 
None of my friends who knew him extensively before we got married can believe that he's the same guy. He's changed so much. 
Submitting to him is laying down completely and dying. Not fighting for my own worth as a person of equality in this marriage and I refuse to do so 100%. I will continue to listen to God and continue to submit as He calls me to.

Lori's response:

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God calls you to obey your husband in everything. Learning to treat others the way you want them to treat you, forgiving them, blessing them, and loving them is how God changes them. When you submit and forgive, even when it seems unfair, joy will flow from you as you walk in obedience to God but as you hold onto your "rights" you will never find true joy and happiness.

The reader continues:

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Why does it always talk about physical abuse only? How many of you have been married to "Godly, Christian" men who yell and swear at you and call you names, because you didn't sweep the floor before leaving the house? Have you been yelled at and told how your daughter is going to pay the price for you making him 10 minutes late for hanging out with friends? How many people have lived in this fear and been told that it's only okay to leave IF there if physical abuse? What happens to those of us who can't speak up for ourselves, who cannot protect our children? Why is hitting someone so much worse than yelling at them for 30 minutes and telling them how worthless they are? Not a single statement here has been exaggerated from my real circumstances. And everyone I tell only asks me: "Has he hit you?" No, but I'm still dying inside.

Lori:

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I am very sorry for your situation Kristi. I have been praying about giving you my advice. The Bible doesn't give an out of marriage for a spouse yelling at you. God hates divorce because it causes so much pain. Yes, you are in pain now, but divorce won't lessen your pain, especially your children's pain. Children want a daddy, even a daddy that yells at them. I would suggest you read my post "Soft Answers Turn Away Wrath" http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2012/03/soft-an... 

I would also like you to search your heart and be honest with yourself about things you are doing wrong in the marriage. Are you trying to please him, honor him, love him, not nagging or angry with him? Is your heart filled with bitterness and anger? You can only change yourself and as I have mentored women, as they have worked on changing themselves, their husbands have changed 100% of the time.

Pure evil.

[Audrey2]

@Koala (I'm not sure how to do the blue highlighted mention instead of the whole quote)

 

I have no words for Lori or her response. These letters for advice break my heart. No one, woman or man, should be counseled to stay in a relationship like this. If someone chooses to stay, that is up to them, although I hope they will choose to escape. I can't imagine looking into the water and seeing a person drowning or hearing their cries and telling that person it is God's will that they drown. 

 

Rant over, now I need a really long walk.

[sparkles]

I really have to stop reading Lori threads. She makes me see red.

You chose to whore yourself out for whatever you thought you were getting from your miserable marriage, Lori, and it's made you an angry, bitter, jealous, resentful hag. But instead of trying to change things for the better, you're just determined to drag every other woman down into hell with you. My heart breaks for any woman you've ever "mentored."

[ViolaSebastian]

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Children want a daddy, even a daddy that yells at them. 

Horrifically, horribly, and dangerously untrue. At 33, I'm still paying the price for a man who verbally abused my mother and I throughout my childhood. It effects my mental health, my self-esteem, and my current relationships with men. I detest Dr. Phil, but he has a saying that I love: "Children would rather BE from a broken home than live IN one." It is a horrible way to grow up. I was isolated from my half-sibling, my mother's family, and my friends (no one wants to invite a buddy over only to have dad flip out and act like a jerk to your mother while she's over). My mother is (and was) a wonderful woman who has to be pushed to yell at someone and has the longest fuse of anyone I've ever known. She did EVERYTHING and went along with EVERYTHING to please that man. I never knew peace until they divorced when I was fourteen--it was always living on edge, waiting for the next blow up, and trying to prevent it by trying to be "perfect," which is an entirely unfair burden to put on a child who is still learning about the world. (And, at the risk of being mocked by certain people over at GOMI, a major reason why I suffer from an anxiety disorder as an adult.) I remember desperately trying to clean the house at six and seven so that he wouldn't scream at my mother for doing what he deemed a poor job--that's a sick way for a tiny child to live and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I don't look back on my childhood with any comfort or nostalgia. It was nothing but terror or the prospect of terror all the time.  And that's the damn truth, no matter what Lori's tiny brain is telling her. Seriously, fuck this monster.

[Koala]

A reader on Facebook asked Lori for advice about her teenage daughter dating.  Of course Lori hauled out the ladder and climbed up on her high horse:

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We never allowed our children to be alone with a member of the opposite sex until they were 18 and then they only wanted to go out with someone who was marriage material. They didn't date to just date.

Of course in a 2014 post announcing her daughter's recent marriage, she said the following:

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Sure, she dated a lot of guys but none that seemed right for her.

In another post she flip flops again:

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Our children did not date much. 

Also, these two statements seem to contradict:

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Ryan was my only child that had a girlfriend in high school and I was constantly asking him if he was treating her as a sister with absolute purity. 

Why would she have to do that if:

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We never allowed our children to be alone with a member of the opposite sex until they were 18

 

[iheartchacos]

She is a monster and she needs to be shut down. Fucking sorry excuse for a human being. I can't imagine looking to her for help and getting that advice.

[iheartchacos]

She needs a page refuting all her lies like the Pearls.

[Grimalkin]

1 hour ago, iheartchacos said:

She needs a page refuting all her lies like the Pearls.

The only reason I would disagree with this is it would give her Mott attention. If she has a page devoted to exposing her she must be important. 

      My theory is that her most ardent supporters are miserable like she is. Reading her vile crap justifies them not doing anything about their misery. Her flow charts are ridiculous beyond belief.

[laPapessaGiovanna]

On 14/4/2016 at 11:32 PM, docmom said:

Did you note the verse Lori used to illustrate the wrong way to teach other women?:

"Ever learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth"

I mean it describes her perfectly doesn't it?   Did she even notice that her blog is called "Always learning"?

It would make a good post count! I don't remember if we already have something similar though. 

[molecule]

Today is *gasp* another flow chart! She's added highlighting this time.

This one was done by someone other than her, which means that her flowchartitis is infections. Oh, joy.

 

[polecat]

Dear God, would you PLEASE cut off Lori's WiFi connection? She's blaspheming your name on the reg, she's spiritually abusing women in the name of your son and she's spewing some on the vilest hate I've seen since Donald Trump. (Sorry, Donald -- not trying to disparage you by lumping you in with The Lorken here.)

Should I make a flow chart, God? 

[laPapessaGiovanna]

36 minutes ago, molecule said:

Today is *gasp* another flow chart! She's added highlighting this time.

This one was done by someone other than her, which means that her flowchartitis is infections. Oh, joy.

 

Actually this flowchart is the first one that makes sense, at a logical level at least. Just a coincidence that it's the only one not written by the Godly Mentor right?

[Gemini]

3 hours ago, laPapessaGiovanna said:

Actually this flowchart is the first one that makes sense, at a logical level at least. Just a coincidence that it's the only one not written by the Godly Mentor right?

Someone has to be trolling Lori there. Column one is the Godly Mentor to a tee!

[Florita]

May I suggest the following edit?

 

[EyeQueue]

8 hours ago, molecule said:

Today is *gasp* another flow chart! She's added highlighting this time.

This one was done by someone other than her, which means that her flowchartitis is infections. Oh, joy.

 

Anyone notice the change in the handwriting? I would suspect this has to do with some of the pushback she's been getting in her comments. Notice how she has some material IN ALL CAPS.

And if we were to be able to actually see that piece of paper, we would probably see the words scratched forcefully into the paper. I get the image of her digging this out, with her face frozen in a rictus-smile, gritting her teeth. *shudder*

ETA: Well, shit. That's what I get for not reading carefully. The different handwriting is b/c it's not Lori.

Ignore me and carry on.

[Koala]

I am pretty sure Lori falls squarely onto the left side of this flow chart.

STEP 1: Tell People about it

Lori

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Years ago, we let someone use our car for a couple of months since they needed one while they were in the area. When they brought it back to us, the front windshield had a crack all the way across it and there was absolutely no gas in it, plus they never offered to pay for it.

Step 2 & 3:  The listeners begin to think less of my offender/ They join me in speaking negatively about my offender.

Reader

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horrified about your car story tho, cannot believe someone would be so careless and rude with your possessions!!

Step 4: 

Lori has gossiped and drawn her readers into her drama (causing them to sin, according to the flow chart she posted.  

 

 

[Grimalkin]

The thing about gossip is while people will listen, maybe even engage a bit, it doesn't mean they believe or even agree with what you say. They might even go and find out the other side. This is where things may backfire.

[laPapessaGiovanna]

7 hours ago, Gemini said:

Someone has to be trolling Lori there. Column one is the Godly Mentor to a tee!

Could be. She's so unaware of her own ways that going on she might have difficulties recognising herself in the mirror. "Who is that one that looks so like me but she's not me and wears such a low neckline?"

[ChickenettiLuvr]

Oh, sweet Mary and Joseph and All Things Horseradish!!!!

This bitch is TOO MUCH. Seriously. I made it through 2.75 years of her "blog." Ugh. Please tell me that every woman she's mentored hasn't (a) divorced, (b) drowned her children, or (c) committed suicide???  Because I don't see any actual potential for a happy ending with this witch.  OMG.

The only reason I made it that far is because I'm completely sleep-deprived from dual dog-sitting & husband-sitting. (The crazy dogs in heat are actually an easier task than the crabby husband post-surgery. I was very frustrated that he wasn't admitted for 48 hours & highly medicated before I got to bring him home. And he refuses to take his Rx pain pills. However, I might "accidentally" take one tonight  for a few Percocet-dreams ...)

If I even attempted to convince Mr. Etti to follow Lorken's rules for marriage, he'd run over me with the snowblower and throw me into the compost bin.

...okay ... now headed to the liquor cabinet so I don't ragey-scratch the paint off the walls...
(FYI - Lori is way more infuriating to me than dimwit JillieRod.)

 

P.S. And she has ruined enjoying a "big, healthy salad" for me for the rest of my natural life.

[ChickenettiLuvr]

Wow.  I just made it to the end of Part 1.  Made me even ragey-er-er when Lori & Ken both dug their heels in to defend Smuggar's molestation of sisters.  That is a new low, even for FJ.  Now, Nicole Naugler looks better than these idiots.  Gah.
............
To the BRILLIANT FJer who created the FB page -- Always Learning Baking Company -- and the fabulous "perfect cake" posts:
When we have our actual FJ convention in real life, I'm buying you a drink.
You made me spit vodka lemonade out my nose. (that sucker burned!!)
Serious comedic brilliance, you have.

[caszandra]

@ChickenettiLuvr, Ken showed up on page 2 to 'set the record straight'. Have fun or try not to fall asleep at his long winded drivel!

 

[ChickenettiLuvr]

Well, of course all ebil wimmenz should be required to get a degree as Becky Home Ecky to be god-honoring and a suitable helpmeet.  Especially for laundry tasks.  Because none of us college-edjumacated liberalz is smart enough to figure stuff out some other way.  
...............
Speaking of laundry ... I'll just leave this here.
 

 

[desertvixen]

Not like we learned how to a) read or b)research anything while getting edjumacated....