FJ did you thank your mother for giving you life

[Toothfairy]

This reminds me of the time my husband was at the supermarket with our first child, who was a baby at the time (and who was very much wanted and planned for). Some old man came up to him, asked him if that was his son, and then said, "Congratulations for not aborting him." :o

Wow that's very fucking rude! What a douche bag. I remember when I was out with my daughter and this lady asked her if her parent was with her. She pointed to me and of course the lady asked if I was her real mom. My daughter told her she's adopted and the lady flat out told her she should be thanking her mom for choosing life and not murdering her. :hand: People can be so damn rude!

[ADoyle90815]

I'll thank my mother, grandmother, and at least three of my great-grandmothers for being shameless hussies who had sex before they were married, because otherwise my grandparents/parents wouldn't have been conceived and I wouldn't be here today. :)

I'd have to thank at least one of my great grandmothers for having sex before marriage, as the sperm donor for my grandmother on my mom's side left as soon as he found out my great grandma was pregnant. Basically, the person everyone calls my great grandpa raised that grandmother as if he were the biological father. As for me, I was very much a wanted baby, so there's no need to thank my parents. Even though my extremely devout Catholic grandparents didn't know how to deal with a girl, they were still glad I was born. My brother and other cousins were very much wanted babies as well.

[ShepherdontheRock]

Wow that's very fucking rude! What a douche bag. I remember when I was out with my daughter and this lady asked her if her parent was with her. She pointed to me and of course the lady asked if I was her real mom. My daughter told her she's adopted and the lady flat out told her she should be thanking her mom for choosing life and not murdering her. :hand: People can be so damn rude!

Because the default option for every time a woman gets pregnant is "abort." No matter what.

You see, this is why the "I survived Roe v Wade" shirts are so stupid. What was there to survive? Your parents were obviously never gonna abort you in the first place!

[Cannelle]

My parents tried for five years to have me. I'm not sure what the fruit abortion has to do with that.

[mstee]

I was the product of a totally unplanned teenage pregnancy. Yeah, being on earth is great and all but had my birth mother gotten an abortion, then I wouldn't know any differently. My birth caused a lot of pain in her life; it wasn't some happy, planned occasion. I feel badly that she went through it, even though I'm not too fond of her. And I certainly would never thank her for not aborting me. What a strange thing. I think she would be very confused. And the whole "well what if you're aborting the person who cures cancer?!" thing drives me nuts. How about thinking about how many children are spared being unwanted, possibly abused etc who are aborted. Not everyone wants enough children to be able to compare them to having a garden full of flowers, a la Michelle duggar

[Mercer]

I'm grateful to my parents for a lot of things (they were/are really great parents) but my mom choosing to give birth to me is not one of them. They had a baby because they wanted a baby. It wasn't like they were doing some kind of favor for me in particular, they became parents because they wanted to be parents... and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

Had my mom chosen to have an abortion instead (which was never something they would have considered; they'd been trying to conceive for awhile) I would never have existed in the first place so there wouldn't have been a me to wish things have been different. That thought doesn't bother me.

[bea]

My husband has known all his life that had abortion been legal, his mother would have ended the pregnancy. She was 17, a senior in high school, and went from that to a forced marriage and a baby 7 months later.

I always found that appalling, really, to tell your child you'd have aborted him if given the chance. In any case, my mother in law didn't "choose life," she took the only road open to a pregnant teenager in a Catholic family in small town in 1971 that resulted in keeping her child - she got married.

[Meg0]

I'm sure you didn't mean to, but this really, IMHO, comes across like its a real shame all those poor, apathetic parents didn't just do the right thing and abort all those kids. that doesn't seem like a very good additude for a teacher. And FYI, many of the children in a wealthier school will have terrible lives - they are just better hidden.

I do agree that spending money on birth control access prior to conception, and social supports AFTER children are born should be the priority of the anti- abortion fanatics.

On the subject of thanking your mother for giving birth to you -- one year, on one of my milestone birthdays, I thought it would be a nice gesture to do something for my mom to thank her for having me. - since I wouldn't be having a birthday otherwise. I showed up at her office unannounced with flowers and a card and was going to take her to lunch . She was completely confused - because she forgot it was my birthday. :lol:

I could see how it could come across like that, my apologies.Thank you for pointing that out to me,its something I will have to watch myself about.

I love my students and I love working with the population I do. I wish some of their parents would care about them more and actually act like they want them, not that they had never had them. People always have the ability to change and grow and someone who is apathetic and irresponsible now does have the ability to become a caring responsible parent if they wanted. I just hate that there is this attitude like giving birth is the important part of being a parent, when really the important part is the actual raising of the child. I know that there are children everywhere that suffer abuse as well, but poverty is associated with higher levels of neglect and abuse unfortunately.

[SoybeanQueen]

I wish everyone who was so concerned with life would actually take a look at some of the lives that need to be changed. Like the thousands of waiting children who would like a family of their own. Or the families with lost jobs and lost homes who need some help to get back on their feet. The list could go on and on. That's *life.* If so many people care about life, why are so many kids still waiting to be adopted?

Except I'm also opposed to people adopting because they think it's a religious mission, so I don't often ask about that. It's just frustrating that pro-lifers seem to think their quest has ended when a baby is born.

[roddma]

Not all pro-life people are like these lunatics. I think more people would adopt if the criteria wasnt so stringent. I understand there needs to be criteria, but it's set way too high It's like you have to be a dang millionaire. We also have to keep in mind plenty of wanted kids end up abused. Saying who or who not should be born poses ethical questions. I think of "It's a Wonderful Life in these 'better off not being born' dilemmas. '.Here's an older article , but a different take.

patheos.com/blogs/rebeccafrech/2010/06/come-over-here-and-say-that-to-my-face.html

But Im of the camp if cancer is meant to be cured it will. Plenty of cures and medical advancements have come about since Roe V wade.. A miscarriage could likewise be someone who may have cure cancer.

[sockinshoe]

My mom was an older mom (38 when I was born) who desperately wanted a baby, but thought it would never happen. But I did happen! And then she had another healthy baby at the age of 40, after which she had her tubes tied because she felt that asking for more than 2 perfectly healthy, complication-free babies at her age would have been temping fate.

A lot of people recommended she abort, because she was older and she and my dad were long distance at that time. She made the choice that was right for her, which is why, in spite of being glad I wasn't aborted now that I'm here, I will always be pro-choice.

[SoybeanQueen]

I disagree that it's set up like you have to be wealthy to adopt. We adopted three children. We are not wealthy. It took time, but the process was not that hard.

I didn't say anything about who should or should not be born. Maybe that was directed at another poster. Not sure. But once the children are born, those who are pro-life shouldn't stop caring what happens to them. Pro life means caring for all human life. Or it should.

[DaisyD]

@Meg0 I knew what you meant. My daughter goes to a title 1 school. My son used to too, and the shock I saw on some teachers when they realized how involved I am willing to be (which really doesn’t seem like a lot to me) told me what you said about the demographic. I don't think always apathy (I don't think you said that either) but sheer overwhelmedness.

Other than thinking/hoping I was a Matthew, I was totally planned. I did once, while extremely pregnant and emotional, thank my mom. She had not a clue what I was thanking her for.

I knew one person that "survived Roe v Wade" in a sense. Her mother had several abortions both before and after her. She struggled with why she was different at times. Even she was still pro choice. That answers that for me.

Edited because when you change one part of a sentence, you also have to hit the rest...

[Aurora rising]

Well, in Turkey it´s quite common: Nearly all my turkish friends call their mothers on their birthdays and thank them for giving birth to them. It was a litte bit weird in the beginning, but well...

I have one brother and we were both accidents. But my Mom always told us that she was very glad and didn´t thought about aborting one of us. My Dad on the other hand... let´s forget about him for this topic.

[Toothfairy]

I wish everyone who was so concerned with life would actually take a look at some of the lives that need to be changed. Like the thousands of waiting children who would like a family of their own. Or the families with lost jobs and lost homes who need some help to get back on their feet. The list could go on and on. That's *life.* If so many people care about life, why are so many kids still waiting to be adopted?

Except I'm also opposed to people adopting because they think it's a religious mission, so I don't often ask about that. It's just frustrating that pro-lifers seem to think their quest has ended when a baby is born.

see this irks my nerves. All these people have time and energy to stand outside planned parenthood because abortion is murder and every child is a gift from God, but hates government assistance, unwed mothers, poor mothers, immigration, against birth control, and don't do shit for kids in foster care or kids in inner city neighborhoods.

And i agree i hate when churches or christians adopt because they think they're saving a child and make that child a poster child for their beliefs. See we adopted a orphan whose mother chose life. So choose life!