In which Robert makes me vomit in my mouth

[jerkit]

Included in a list of every man's holiday wish list:

Quote

Sex. There is nothing your husband wants more than Santa’s little helper wearing nothing but a smile…or the skimpy Mrs. Santa outfit that comes out once a year is great too as long as it doesn’t stay on too long.

 

Duuuuuuuuude. Have a little discretion. Some things are better left unsaid.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

Included in a list of every man's holiday wish list:

Duuuuuuuuude. Have a little discretion. Some things are better left unsaid.

Was he hacked? lol... I can't believe he said that!

[jerkit]

Oh, I can abso-effing-lutely believe he said it. It's just so...gross.

He's trollin' on this one, methinks. I think he's just trying to say outrageous things because he wants comments. And a few days from now he'll have a post about how he "doesn't want to be controversial in order to get a response."

LOL

[Koala]

A man, his wife, and his Bible sex fantasies :cray-cray:

[browncoatslytherin]

Oh, I can abso-effing-lutely believe he said it. It's just so...gross.

He's trollin' on this one, methinks. I think he's just trying to say outrageous things because he wants comments. And a few days from now he'll have a post about how he "doesn't want to be controversial in order to get a response."

LOL

i think he trolls on just about everything he posts, some posts he just trolls harder and others are more subtle. this dude is an unbelievable waste of a human being.

[BrownieMomma]

Wait.. this guy professes to be a Christian, right?

I'm seriously not getting all the sex vibe from the far right.

For people who are supposed to be modest and capturing their thoughts, it sure does seem to be the daily topic.

[jerkit]

Wait.. this guy professes to be a Christian, right?

I'm seriously not getting all the sex vibe from the far right.

For people who are supposed to be modest and capturing their thoughts, it sure does seem to be the daily topic.

And it's not even the fantasy part that bothers me, it's the parading of his sex life on the internet that is so disgusting. Get down with your bad self in the privacy of your home. But don't allow the entire internet to be a voyeur in your sex life.

[BrownieMomma]

And it's not even the fantasy part that bothers me, it's the parading of his sex life on the internet that is so disgusting. Get down with your bad self in the privacy of your home. But don't allow the entire internet to be a voyeur in your sex life.

Exactly. I sure as heck did not want to know about the mrs santa suit. And I didn't want to see the pic of Ben and Jessa kissing, and the mirrored one by JB&M makes me think they really are just out there in their thinking. Then I saw her parents pic on Jessa's IG... ugh..

[littlemommy]

Amanda must watch the sun set with a corresponding sinking feeling of dread each night, for she knows she's gonna have to crawl into bed and put out for that douchecanoe.

Cabinetman, I am on to you. Your greatest fear is that people will see what a wimpy, insecure, petty, dumb man you are. Well, you've been seen.

[polecat]

Was he hacked? lol... I can't believe he said that!

I can easily believe he said it. Sadly, he's said far worse.

Sex talk in general doesn't bother me. I'm kind of a sailor myself. But intimate details of your marriage? That might embarrass/humiliate your wife? Not okay.

[cindyluvs24]

Why doesn't he just bend over and give himself a blow job already?

[polecat]

Why doesn't he just bend over and give himself a blow job already?

Probably because his stomach gets in the way.

[Closed Womb]

I'm a little confused as to why this would be a special gift. Isn't the poor wife contractual obligated to meet his sexual needs anyway? (ewww)

Looks like clickbait to me.

[Koala]

I am amazed that puritanical Lori was able to read that in good conscience, but obviously she did, because she commented without making a peep about such vile talk. Interesting that....

[jerkit]

I am amazed that puritanical Lori was able to read that in good conscience, but obviously she did, because she commented without making a peep about such vile talk. Interesting that....

Lori is "very careful who she learns from" and she trusts CM implicitly. She would never question his secondary headship.

[Mecca]

Included in a list of every man's holiday wish list:

Duuuuuuuuude. Have a little discretion. Some things are better left unsaid.

And I am guessing there is nothing his wife wants more than to NOT be Santa's little helper for that asshole of a husband of hers. Hoping you get your Christmas miracle, Amanda.

[jerkit]

I thought more about this and I'm even more appalled. I tried to imagine Mr. Jerkit posting online about his favorite lingerie and what he wants me to wear in the bedroom and I'm just so sad for Amanda. How humiliating.

[Mecca]

I thought more about this and I'm even more appalled. I tried to imagine Mr. Jerkit posting online about his favorite lingerie and what he wants me to wear in the bedroom and I'm just so sad for Amanda. How humiliating.

It is humiliating and just highlights what little respect he has for his wife. Godly husband, my ass...

[lawfulevil]

Let’s be honest, most Christmas presents find their way to the dump within five years.

Maybe you just suck at buying presents, Bob, but I haven't thrown out a Christmas present in years. Not since my grandpa's creepy wife quit sending me terrifying Christian children's books about dying and going to hell. Used, sure- if someone bakes me cookies, obviously the cookies will not magically replenish themselves, which is fucking tragic. But it's not "ending up in the dump" to serve its intended purpose, that's ridiculous, that's like saying "Well, to be frugal, never go grocery shopping. Most groceries end up inside the toilet within two weeks."

And Bob, gross, nobody wanted to imagine you in a Mrs. Claus suit. Oh, not what you meant? Too bad, I'm drawing you that way.

*googles "sanctimonious can of Crisco wearing fur and holding a Bible"*

[GeoBQn]

As a Jew, am I exempt from Christmas sexual role playing?

[browncoatslytherin]

As a Jew, am I exempt from Christmas sexual role playing?

yes, but you must dress as a sexy dreidel

[lawfulevil]

yes, but you must dress as a sexy dreidel

Surprisingly I didn't find any Sexy Dreidel Halloween costumes (seems like everything else has one), but worry not, the perverts on Second Life save us:

marketplace.secondlife.com/fr-FR/p/Short-Sweet-Dreidel/4190428?lang=fr-FR

[GeoBQn]

yes, but you must dress as a sexy dreidel

Sexy dreidel is too easy. Come back to me when you rise to the challenge of Sexy Latke.

[browncoatslytherin]

Sexy dreidel is too easy. Come back to me when you rise to the challenge of Sexy Latke.

i am so glad i was not drinking anything :lol:

[jerkit]

Sexy dreidel is too easy. Come back to me when you rise to the challenge of Sexy Latke.

Everything is sexy about a latke.

Gah, I love taters.