A fat person dared to get in my pro-life picture

[GolightlyGrrl]

I would think that most moral families would actually want a trampoline guard. Makes it less likely that your kid will get injured.

I think what she really means by all that is that poor people don't deserve nice things.

Yeah, nice things like food, shelter, water, clothing, education, healthcare, kindness, empathy, understanding, etc.

[salex]

It is costing her $6100 to go. She is leaving in September and coming back in January. It looks like she will be teaching Bible studies, dance classes and helping with orphans. But she will have to say what she is really doing.

This is what she lists as things she is going to be doing:

I'll actually do things such as... organizing books in the Rafiki School library, leading/assisting in Bible studies, attending church, teaching vocational skills to teen girls, teaching ballet to eager girls on afternoons, travelling to area ministries on occasional weekends, supporting the ROS team in their day-to-day jobs, filing records, and reading to the children. Among other things

Because Dance Classes for girls/orphans is so different from teaching Surfing to Orphans..... :roll:

And, as with most tourisim volunteer positions, could not all of these things be done by locals, with the money used to bankroll her trip used to pay locals, thus infusing dollars into the local economy and creating jobs for local residents?

The Rafiki site says that various amounts of money can be donated for assorted long term items

http://rafikifoundation.org/WaystoGive/DonateAGift.aspx Wouldn't the students acting as support in filing and reading to the younger children instead of her, with the money it will take to get her there donated, buy a lot of sewing machines, computers, etc?

I am also confused as the website says they use career missionaries in the field and I"m not sure she is one. They take volunteers in their main offices in Florida.

http://rafikifoundation.org/Waystogive.aspx

[green]

And, as with most tourisim volunteer positions, could not all of these things be done by locals, with the money used to bankroll her trip used to pay locals, thus infusing dollars into the local economy and creating jobs for local residents?

Interesting that you mentioned creating jobs for local residents, because I'm just reading her post on "Helping poverty, evaluating needs" ofasingleheart.blogspot.dk/2012/11/helping-poverty-evaluating-needs.html

And she says:

Don't give out things. Handing candy to kids in other countries ruins the economy, ruins the parent's dignity, ruins the children's self-worth. You see, in many countries, parents set aside their extra pennies to save up for one piece of candy for Christmas. Their child delights in that one piece of candy. When Americans come with whole bags of it, meaning well, they do many things:

1. They teach that begging is right, as the children who come to Americans can always get what they need. This teaches reliance on others for help instead of empowering.

2. They are taught their parents can't do enough. Suddenly, that one piece of candy doesn't seem so precious anymore.

3. They hurt the economy there. That transaction between the parent and the candy store owner might feed the candy store owner's daughter for a week.

4. They also teach the parents that Americans have things for every need they could ever have. This is why a young boy from Ethiopia came to a family in our church expecting to arrive and immediately get electronics, clothes, junk food, and everything else his little heart desired. He got angry when he didn't get it. In the mind of many Africans, America has everything whenever they want it. It is kind of true, but not entirely. It's interesting to note Africans take it to the "entirely" part and expect everything.

Give them a job. Give them something they can sell. Pray for them. If worse comes to worse and you've nothing else to give, take them to a restaurant for a meal or let them pick out a blanket.

[Soldevi]

She should aim to catastrophe work if she really wants to help people. There are several global organisations such as International Red Cross or the UN who send people to really, really help those in need. Of course, she should educate herself and get a real vocation. They don't want wanna-be teachers, they want no-nonsense hard-working people there. Handing out tracts is not hard work nor singing carols.

I think she glamourizes this whole missionary thing. It was dangerous and hard once but nowadays...oh please. Not to mention I hate evangelization. If you really want to help people, give them shelter, soup, soap, education, hope, food, fresh water, proper sanitation and healthcare, not biblical studies... Midwives are always needed, get educated and help women. Even in middle of the catastrophe, babies are born, it never ceases. If you want to be christ-like, then act like him and follow what he said.

Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.â€

I have always disliked persons who yell it from the rooftops how they do this and that and oh how they felt holy spirit filling them up and how when they met resistance they felt being full of love. Eh. Are you doing it (it being whatever this month's theme is: bothering people at rock concerts or in front of abortion clinics, for example) because you get the emotional kick or because you care (showing your care by calling people names and by distressing them)?

[yewchapel]

Nothing pisses me off more than volunteer tourism done by privileged white kids, or anyone really. In my own Christian circles you get some of that, not quite as obnoxiously as Miss Thing here but still annoying. As someone who has never been further than Belgium in terms of international travel, I frequently get looked down on for not having done a few months in Uganda or wherever. Well fuck them, because I've been there for the girl at my church's youth group because we both have alcoholic biological parents and she's having a hard time at school because her foster mothers are lesbians, and I've been a safe place for the autistic kid to be around, and I've been there to the girl who was homeless at 16 and had three miscarriages by 17, and fuck all the middle-class volunteer tourists if they don't think that's more being Christ to others than building a well in Malawi and then forgetting about it two months later.

[yewchapel]

She should aim to catastrophe work if she really wants to help people. There are several global organisations such as International Red Cross or the UN who send people to really, really help those in need. Of course, she should educate herself and get a real vocation. They don't want wanna-be teachers, they want no-nonsense hard-working people there. Handing out tracts is not hard work nor singing carols.

I think she glamourizes this whole missionary thing. It was dangerous and hard once but nowadays...oh please. Not to mention I hate evangelization. If you really want to help people, give them shelter, soup, soap, education, hope, food, fresh water, proper sanitation and healthcare, not biblical studies... Midwives are always needed, get educated and help women. Even in middle of the catastrophe, babies are born, it never ceases. If you want to be christ-like, then act like him and follow what he said.

I have always disliked persons who yell it from the rooftops how they do this and that and oh how they felt holy spirit filling them up and how when they met resistance they felt being full of love. Eh. Are you doing it (it being whatever this month's theme is: bothering people at rock concerts or in front of abortion clinics, for example) because you get the emotional kick or because you care (showing your care by calling people names and by distressing them)?

A lot of the time, the best and most helpful things to do for people in need (and this is all people in need, at home and elsewhere) are the crappiest. Doing the dishes, sorting through donated clothes, making lunch, watching kids for half an hour so their parents can get a check-up or some advice, struggling through period pain to make someone feel welcome because really, your pain is not important here. That's the first thing to learn about loving others - you are not important. Your agenda is not important. Your comfort is not important. I don't mean that you should hurt yourself or that you are a bad person, simply that to love someone is putting your needs aside, at least for a while. Making the woman whose just had an abortion a cup of tea and calling a cab for her is far more Christlike than hassling and humiliating her in public outside an abortion clinic. No matter your view on abortion, actually - not approving of abortion doesn't stop you from being kind to women who have abortions. Even if you view them as the enemy, Jesus did kind of tell us to be kind to our enemies (not that I personally view women who have abortions as the enemy).

[jaynie]

Nothing pisses me off more than volunteer tourism done by privileged white kids, or anyone really. In my own Christian circles you get some of that, not quite as obnoxiously as Miss Thing here but still annoying. As someone who has never been further than Belgium in terms of international travel, I frequently get looked down on for not having done a few months in Uganda or wherever. Well fuck them, because I've been there for the girl at my church's youth group because we both have alcoholic biological parents and she's having a hard time at school because her foster mothers are lesbians, and I've been a safe place for the autistic kid to be around, and I've been there to the girl who was homeless at 16 and had three miscarriages by 17, and fuck all the middle-class volunteer tourists if they don't think that's more being Christ to others than building a well in Malawi and then forgetting about it two months later.

Someone once told me that if you want to help people in struggling countries and experience their cultures at the same time, the best thing you can do in 99% of cases is just be a tourist. Spend money at restaurants and hotels and on tour guides. Buy souvenirs from locals. Some people do extraordinarily great volunteer work, but generally they're people who dedicate their *lives* to it, not a few months, and they really understand local politics and issues and etc. That last bit is why it's more effective to volunteer your time and empathy at home, where you aren't playing White Hero to a bunch of "savages" which is what a lot of voluntourism boils down to. I'm definitely in favour of foreign aid (including "fun" programs too), etc. But foreign aid that works. Not a few months of Ballet for Jesus from someone who is in it to alleviate her guilt about being privileged.

I do like to joke that the Doctor invented Voluntourism, though.

[cjsmom]

I knew a young Christian girl fundraising door to door for a trip to Australia to minister to prostitutes there. She was convinced that God was calling her to go there. She didn't know I was an athiest, and therefore really wasn't swayed by the idea that God would want me to contribute money for her to go. I said I'd give her money for her trip after she proved that she had volunteered with people living on the street in our nearest city (I live in a town of 500 people, an hour away from one with 10,000). Needless to say, she didn't volunteer, but is still fundraising.

Both the girl in my community and the blogger in question want a vacation.

I am strongly considering international education outreach - there are a number of programs where I could take a sabbatical from work to help teachers in developing nations work in general classrooms or in the growing field of special education (which is my area) - but I would go where I was needed, not where I chose to vacation. I am under no illusions that I will be holding poor, cute children and taking photos of me with them for my blog so I can feel good. I know the work will be helping other educators teach with almost no resources. That challenge alone scares the crap out of me, but once my son is grown, I would love to see if I have what it takes. But I will pay for the whole venture myself.

[Arete]

A lot of the time, the best and most helpful things to do for people in need (and this is all people in need, at home and elsewhere) are the crappiest. Doing the dishes, sorting through donated clothes, making lunch, watching kids for half an hour so their parents can get a check-up or some advice, struggling through period pain to make someone feel welcome because really, your pain is not important here. That's the first thing to learn about loving others - you are not important. Your agenda is not important. Your comfort is not important. I don't mean that you should hurt yourself or that you are a bad person, simply that to love someone is putting your needs aside, at least for a while. Making the woman whose just had an abortion a cup of tea and calling a cab for her is far more Christlike than hassling and humiliating her in public outside an abortion clinic. No matter your view on abortion, actually - not approving of abortion doesn't stop you from being kind to women who have abortions. Even if you view them as the enemy, Jesus did kind of tell us to be kind to our enemies (not that I personally view women who have abortions as the enemy).

I am wiping tears from my face reading this post. When I was in the throes of grief and was nearly catatonic, it was the people who made sure I had hot food to eat and would visit me and do a few loads of my laundry at the same time who were really practicing doing "for the least of my brothers and sisters". There are always plenty of people in our own backyard who can use help and comfort. But that sort of outreach would not give our chicky here the same sort of religious "high".

[lilith]

I knew a young Christian girl fundraising door to door for a trip to Australia to minister to prostitutes there. She was convinced that God was calling her to go there. She didn't know I was an athiest, and therefore really wasn't swayed by the idea that God would want me to contribute money for her to go. I said I'd give her money for her trip after she proved that she had volunteered with people living on the street in our nearest city (I live in a town of 500 people, an hour away from one with 10,000). Needless to say, she didn't volunteer, but is still fundraising.

Both the girl in my community and the blogger in question want a vacation.

.

Is she fucking serious? Prostitution is legal in Australia. My flat mate when I was at uni was and is a prostitute. Many, many prostitutes are students and mothers. Some are migrant women, some are drug addicts. None will welcome a clueless Christian teenager from America trying to interfere in their sexual and economic choices.

We have churches here. We also have welfare and healthcare. Women and men make the choice to become sex workers for many reasons, and as they have bodily autonomy and it's a legal industry it's none of anyone's fucking business.

When its a decent hour I've got to call a few friends and tell them that they are the target of a "ministry". Once they've got their kids off to school, been to the gym and checked their appointments for the day, they will have a good laugh in their lovely homes in their expensive inner city neighbourhoods. Prostitution in Australia - I don't think it looks a thing like she expects it to.

[JesusFightClub]

Not if you're a modern-day 'Murican conservative Christian Republican. This is their worldview*.

*Don't ask me; I don't understand it either.

Ah yeah. Even after how long I've been to FJ, I forget.

The local Socialist Workers' Party branch meet in a church round here, that same church has a big banner on the wall saying "Gay, Lesbian, Transgender, Faith and Peace". The biggest church on the main shopping street has a strong social justice focus and has a huge painting up which changes every so often to reflect social issues. Along the road from that is a church which hosts the Palestinian shop Hadeel.

It is different here :D

[cjsmom]

Is she fucking serious? Prostitution is legal in Australia. My flat mate when I was at uni was and is a prostitute. Many, many prostitutes are students and mothers. Some are migrant women, some are drug addicts. None will welcome a clueless Christian teenager from America trying to interfere in their sexual and economic choices.

We have churches here. We also have welfare and healthcare. Women and men make the choice to become sex workers for many reasons, and as they have bodily autonomy and it's a legal industry it's none of anyone's fucking business.

When its a decent hour I've got to call a few friends and tell them that they are the target of a "ministry". Once they've got their kids off to school, been to the gym and checked their appointments for the day, they will have a good laugh in their lovely homes in their expensive inner city neighbourhoods. Prostitution in Australia - I don't think it looks a thing like she expects it to.

Yep, absolutely dead serious. FWIW, I would actually be very much in favour of prostitution being legalized in Canada.

[lilith]

Yep, absolutely dead serious. FWIW, I would actually be very much in favour of prostitution being legalized in Canada.

The results in of legalisation in Australia have been undramatic but positive.

When you remove the aspect of illegality you will attract more empowered, educated women who are not socially disenfranchised to the industry, who empower other workers through their educations, knowledge of legal rights, and confidence in pursuing them. It's win win.

[dairyfreelife]

Her blog is working again!

And in this post: ofasingleheart.blogspot.dk/2012/11/mission-mondays-god-is-good.html

She explains how God inspired her to go to Africa, and which categories of people "tug her heart".....

Black kids? Black kids?! Really? Really?! My boyfried was a black kid and he is not and never was your special project to feed your own overinflated ego. I am sorry, but it really, really drives me up a wall to hear people like you "other" him. Actually, no, I'm not sorry. Black children are children, not a "special" type of child for you to use so you can feel you are doing good deeds for your idea of a god. I see people like you "other" people all the time, be it red-heads, mixed race or any darker skin tone on people. Acting as if they are just cute, unique beings. I even get it because of my height "you look so cute, you should be a fairy or thumbelina for Halloween, you'd look so adorable"...I'm 24 and no, I don't want to be cute, especially since the people who say this are usually younger than I am. It is irritating to me and I have seen it irritate other people too, so simply put: STOP IT ALREADY!

If you want to help get medicine, clean water and food, warm clothing, education and/or build better shelter for places lacking, that's great, but stop bringing race and religion into it! No one is here for you for you to use. Not black kids, not Muslims, not women, not the poor, not the ill, not the impared, no one is here to be your pet. And I my boyfriend and I ever have a child and you ever attempted to "other" her, especially as oh so cute biracial child and think you can pretend to do something for her for your personal gain at an attempt to get a notch on your ticket to heaven, I will knock you clear to the west coast.

[RachelB]

Ah yeah. Even after how long I've been to FJ, I forget.

The local Socialist Workers' Party branch meet in a church round here, that same church has a big banner on the wall saying "Gay, Lesbian, Transgender, Faith and Peace". The biggest church on the main shopping street has a strong social justice focus and has a huge painting up which changes every so often to reflect social issues. Along the road from that is a church which hosts the Palestinian shop Hadeel.

It is different here :D

Honestly, I'm a little envious. I live in a (for the U.S.) very liberal place, and that level of left-ish activism is still unusual within churches within this community.

[yewchapel]

I can't speak for Scotland - although in my experience both Scottish Presbyterians and Episcopalians tend to be on the liberal side, Scottish Catholics not so much - but it really depends on where you are in the UK. You wouldn't find left-wing social activism like that in Northern Ireland or in certain dioceses in England, but you would in others. I'd guess that the same is true for the US.

[Jezebel]

Both the girl in my community and the blogger in question want a vacation.

Yeah, pretty much this. They have no skills, no experience in the world, and no real understanding of the people they expect to minister to. But mostly, they're bored and want to go do something different, and being a missionary will give them the social sanction they feel they need in order to go do that.

And, I would venture, playing missionary is also a way of gaining a bit of recognition and respect within their church community that is normally denied to young, unmarried women. "Stay-at-home daughter"? Or "Missionary to Africa?" Which is going to impress people more?

Secular and non-fundie kids who decide they want to travel, and save up the money to do so, can just go--they don't need to justify it by playing missionary. Ofasingleheart is still deeply invested in the ultra-conservative fundie culture she claims she's breaking away from, and to simply decide to go to Africa because she wants to? That ain't happening. She still wants acceptance and respect from the same fundies she claims she's no longer in complete agreement with. So she's going to go to Africa to do low-skill tasks that the locals could just as easily do, or that the orphans could easily be taught. Oh, and teach girls whatever small amount of ballet she knows. And since she'll take her crappy, condescending attitude with her, I expect we'll see plenty of blog posts about how those annoying and gross those Africans are.

If she really wanted to help people, she would do a lot more good by volunteering at home. She loves black kids so much? I'll bet there are plenty of black kids in need right in her community, or within an easy drive, and I'll also bet she's never lifted a finger to help them. If she really wanted to help people in Africa in a substantial way, she would be better off learning actual medical or technical skills that are desperately needed before going. But no--she wants a vacation where she can go talk about Jesus to the natives, who will of course be grateful because she's so smart.

[Boogalou]

It is costing her $6100 to go. She is leaving in September and coming back in January. It looks like she will be teaching Bible studies, dance classes and helping with orphans. But she will have to say what she is really doing.

This is what she lists as things she is going to be doing:

I'll actually do things such as... organizing books in the Rafiki School library, leading/assisting in Bible studies, attending church, teaching vocational skills to teen girls, teaching ballet to eager girls on afternoons, travelling to area ministries on occasional weekends, supporting the ROS team in their day-to-day jobs, filing records, and reading to the children. Among other things

Thanks for this FG.

organizing books

Anyone literate can do that. About 70% of the people in Tanzania are literate and about 75% of people in Malawi. I'm thinking they could find someone there.

leading/assisting in Bible studies, attending church

That's nice but not particularly useful.

teaching vocational skills to teen girls

What vocational skills are you teaching? This might be useful if there are a shortage of people who are able to teach these things.

teaching ballet

Again, this is nice, but probably not especially useful. It might be nice enrichment though. But again, are ballet lessons worth $6100?

travelling to area ministries on occasional weekends, supporting the ROS team in their day-to-day jobs

Not really sure what this means or entails, so I won't comment on it.

filing records and reading to the children

Again, anyone can do that as long as they are literate. Is there a shortage of people over there that they are desperate for foreign labour? If not, that may be taking away a job from a local.

[JesusFightClub]

I can't speak for Scotland - although in my experience both Scottish Presbyterians and Episcopalians tend to be on the liberal side, Scottish Catholics not so much - but it really depends on where you are in the UK. You wouldn't find left-wing social activism like that in Northern Ireland or in certain dioceses in England, but you would in others. I'd guess that the same is true for the US.

The Protestant/Catholic thing is tricky up here ;) I think you get really old-fashioned Catholics and those somewhat less so, but I'd agree with you in my experience (esp. on issue of gay marriage).

The churches I was thinking of are two Presbytarian and one Episcopal, but I don't know exactly what kinds of that they are...

[ILoveJellybeans]

Cant she just donate the trip money to a charity that will help people over in Africa, and then go volunteer to read to local kids at the library or doing dance classes for local kids. Or she could get a job at a daycare or something, which would mean she can read to and teach all the children she wants, get paid for doing it, and then donate any spare money she has to charity. The money would help way more than an unexperienced teen girl, and she could have those experiences with volunteering and working with children at home.

[thoughtful]

You're so upset about someone being called fat, and this past weekend I've been called, and I quote:

"bitch, fucktard, cuntlicker, fuckass, suckbutt, uglybitch, shiteater, whore, witchwhore, assface, slut, retard, narrowminded" end quote.

This seems unlikely to me, at least from the freejinger group, who always seem more articulate than that. WHat other posts have you been seeding to try to get your blog hits up?

As someone else often says "pictures, or it never happened."

I haven't read the last few pages of this thread yet, but, up to this post, she hadn't said who called her those names.

Heck, maybe it was a "friend" who found out about some betrayal on her part, or a driver she cut off in traffic, or somebody in church (well, OK, probably not the latter). :D

But seriously, folks -- can't speak for the lurkers, and I guess people could post one way here and another somewhere else, but it just doesn't seem like a style likely to come from FJers.

Anything ending with "tard," and anything that treats being female, sexually active and/or gay as an automatic insult, seems unlikely to have come from anyone who actually posts here.

So that leaves "shiteater" (not likely), "suckbutt and "assface" (eh, I doubt it, unless we have underage lurkers), and "narrowminded" -- wait, we may have a winner! "Narrowminded" might have come from one of us.

But we have a lot of good spellers, so I imagine it would have been "narrow-minded" or "narrow minded." :whistle:

Back to reading the thread. . .

[Dark Matters]

Cant she just donate the trip money to a charity that will help people over in Africa, and then go volunteer to read to local kids at the library or doing dance classes for local kids. Or she could get a job at a daycare or something, which would mean she can read to and teach all the children she wants, get paid for doing it, and then donate any spare money she has to charity. The money would help way more than an unexperienced teen girl, and she could have those experiences with volunteering and working with children at home.

Yeah but none of those things are brag-worthy, which is what she seems to be looking for.

[divadivine]

I haven't read the last few pages of this thread yet, but, up to this post, she hadn't said who called her those names.

Heck, maybe it was a "friend" who found out about some betrayal on her part, or a driver she cut off in traffic, or somebody in church (well, OK, probably not the latter). :D

But seriously, folks -- can't speak for the lurkers, and I guess people could post one way here and another somewhere else, but it just doesn't seem like a style likely to come from FJers.

Anything ending with "tard," and anything that treats being female, sexually active and/or gay as an automatic insult, seems unlikely to have come from anyone who actually posts here.

So that leaves "shiteater" (not likely), "suckbutt and "assface" (eh, I doubt it, unless we have underage lurkers), and "narrowminded" -- wait, we may have a winner! "Narrowminded" might have come from one of us.

But we have a lot of good spellers, so I imagine it would have been "narrow-minded" or "narrow minded." :whistle:

Back to reading the thread. . .

I called her a wanker up thread.... clearly she doesn't know the true meaning of the word :whistle:

[Sola]

Her blog is working again!

And in this post: ofasingleheart.blogspot.dk/2012/11/mission-mondays-god-is-good.html

She explains how God inspired her to go to Africa, and which categories of people "tug her heart".....

And of course Catholics are a huge DON'T!

Black kids? Does that come across as really, REALLY, condescending to anyone else?

[stacyf]

My rather privileged nephew who is 17 and white manages to coach inner city youth wrestling, tutor, fund raise for these kids and collect used gear. This year he was able to see the fruits of his labor bloom as one young man, who would probably never get a chance at college, get a scholarship to a prestigious HS for wrestling and the academics that the wrestling club demanded. He did all this in the city close to his home and made a difference without spending one dime or fundraising any dollars (for himself to travel etc.). I think Ofasingleheart needs to look right out her front door for people to help, there are plenty of them.

Black kids? Does that come across as really, REALLY, condescending to anyone else?

The Muslim one also stood out to me as just strange. Like all Muslims need her help but I guess she thinks all Black Kids need her help too, so it all makes some kind of sense in her small mind. :shrug: