Bates Courtship

[Guest]

According to peoplefinders.com, he's 23. That's older than Alyssa, and quite a but for their ages, but not to the point where it's icky, in my opinion.

[sdongo]

23 isn't bad. I thought he was much older!

[tabitha2]

I mean...honestly,it's not like she is going to go to college to have a career-hell, will never work at a burger king in all likely hood. if she can get an at least upper middle class young man to marry right off and avoid used car salesmen who live in grandmas house or penniless wanna be missionaries or perennial spinsterhood in dads house I say more power to her :D

[fauxmenno]

Alyssa doesn't look quite as comfortable with John as Chad and Erin do together, but they do look happy. In one picture it looks like she is sort of leaning into him so hopefully they really like each other and will be happy.

[bananacat]

Why should it mater if the younger sibs get married off first? That is an old fashioned idea! I was the youngest of 5 and was the first to be married.

Wow, are you completely unaware of how old-fashioned these families are?

[eye_browz]

Alyssa is wearing platform heels! I guess that Alyssa and the Webster boy are "just friends" at this point, but it looks like a date. Remember Chad and Erin were texting each other as "friends" for a year or so before they officially started courting. It's strange that Kelly included pictures of Alyssa and John before a courtship announcement was made.

I just noticed the picture where Erin grab Chad by the tie . It is so ... can I say sexual or will I go to hell?

yes, I noticed that picture. Scandalous! This girl will have her headship wrapped around her little finger, which is great for her. I'm not concerned about her wedding night; she will be just fine.

I hope that Erin and Alyssa are texting the Duggar girls and informing them about their dates. I think that the Bates girls are eager to marry because it appears that they will be moving "up" financially and socially. The Duggar family is already at the top of their social circle, so maybe there is no motivation to leave? Or maybe the parents are being selfish.

[meep]

Remember it took awhile to announce Erin & Chad's courtship - I guess they wanted to be sure, as they should be - so maybe they are courting but they don't want to make it officially public just in case. If things go south, they can always say he was "just a family friend".

[AVENues]

It DEFINITELY looks like John Webster and Alyssa are courting. In one picture they are sitting next to each other and THEIR ARMS ARE TOUCHING. How defrauding.

A) I feel like if they are courting, the Duggars are going to need to step it up if they want to keep up

B) Poor Michaela and Zach... Their "pretty" younger sisters might get married off before them.

I don't think that getting married should be a race between siblings. If it was so, they could just marry the first asshole that comes by. Many people do, even in the non-fundy world. Marriage should be about wanting to get married and have a family, and doing it with someone we get along with, we are on the same page with and we LOVE : )

riffle riffle riffle

[HOTW]

Wow, are you completely unaware of how old-fashioned these families are?

Yes I AM to the point where the Maxwell girls are languishing at home..I just find it a little silly that th ecomment was made because even in Victorian times it was not always the eldest who got married first...

[sunshine]

It DEFINITELY looks like John Webster and Alyssa are courting. In one picture they are sitting next to each other and THEIR ARMS ARE TOUCHING. How defrauding.

A) I feel like if they are courting, the Duggars are going to need to step it up if they want to keep up

B) Poor Michaela and Zach... Their "pretty" younger sisters might get married off before them.

I would not say poor Zach. He has the power to choose. Michaela did experience a caller but her parent thought she was too young. Zach could go out and 'find a suitor' for his sister. I think I read a blog when that is encourage. If anyone remembers a father who creepily described his daughter's wedding about her husband salvating and they run off to their car and something about not wanting to be bond to the government in marriage..that is the one.

[MMS]

Daniel Webster (John's father) is the representative in the town next to mine. He is extremely well respected and his church home is a huge Baptist church in Orlando. He is seen as a representative of the people. He gets out and mingles, talks to people, etc, and is extremely personable. Even with the Taliban Dan ad, he was pretty much assured of election. Had no idea his son was possibly courting a Bates daughter. Very interesting.

[Slt]

Did anyone notice the ring on Alyssa's ring finger? I would think purity ring, but Erin doesn't have one.

blog.thebatesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/IMG_2832.jpg

[Guest]

Erin and Chad both wear purity rings on their left middle fingers, so I would guess that's what it is.

Kelly replied in a comment that Alyssa and John are not courting, but they are getting to know each other and becoming "special friends." I guess we'll have to wait and see!

[xReems]

Yeah, Kelly said that Alyssa and John are just getting to know each other and nothing is set in stone.

How interesting-Kelly and Gil's two daughters have found someone (er, well, Alyssa is getting to know John), yet, Boob and Mullet can't get any of their daughters to find someone.

Correction, they're refusing to allow them to court since they rely way too much on them to help raise the little ones.

Back to topic-noticed that even during the "getting to know" phase, Kelly and Gil don't put the whole "6 inch rule", which is good. Glad to see them bend the courtship rule a bit. Like I said previously, they're still a bunch of crazies but at least they learned from Zach's failed courtship and allow their children to put in emotion in a relationship and not put too many "no touching" restrictions.

[Pearl1234]

I like the Bates more. they seem more normal and allow their kids more freedom than some of the other families. Alyssa is definitely leaning in to John and looking very comfortable, so it must be more than 'getting to know'.

Jim Bob said on some episode(not sure which one) that he gets lots of letter every week from guys asking to court his daughters.........bot time one of them left home!!!

[sunshine]

I recall Jim Bob stating that they get constant inquries of interest towards the girls, but they are in no rush. I guess when you have the pick of the litter, you may want to pull back and wait to see who is better.

[Ralar]

Yeah, Kelly said that Alyssa and John are just getting to know each other and nothing is set in stone.

How interesting-Kelly and Gil's two daughters have found someone (er, well, Alyssa is getting to know John), yet, Boob and Mullet can't get any of their daughters to find someone.

Correction, they're refusing to allow them to court since they rely way too much on them to help raise the little ones.

Back to topic-noticed that even during the "getting to know" phase, Kelly and Gil don't put the whole "6 inch rule", which is good. Glad to see them bend the courtship rule a bit. Like I said previously, they're still a bunch of crazies but at least they learned from Zach's failed courtship and allow their children to put in emotion in a relationship and not put too many "no touching" restrictions.

They're not courting. They're daing with a purpose.

[Chibi Author]

In normal families, I wouldn't think twice about it. However when marriages are arranged, children have to live with their parents until they're married, and children are taught that marriage is the only goal in life, the rules are different. It's an old fashioned idea, but this is an old fashioned way of going about things.

Also, Zach has a broken courtship behind him and Michaela is 23- getting close to old maid status in the ATI world.

I just realized that Lawson and Nathan are older than Alyssa- who just turned 18! They better not marry her off this young...

After the whole Zach/Sarah thing, the Bates' really have backed off on the courtship thing. IMO, they're probably not pushing the kids to anything, which may be why Alyssa is possibly courting, and Micheala isn't.

Maybe not, but I do think if any fundie parents are going to be willing to let the kids pick their own speeds with marrying and all, the Bates seem very likely.

[Ellimenopy]

Why should it mater if the younger sibs get married off first? That is an old fashioned idea! I was the youngest of 5 and was the first to be married.

Um, that's nice for you and everything, but I was an older sister who did not get married first, and, well... it sucked. It absolutely was commented on in our church (very fundie-lite Southern Baptist church). All those years of preparing you to bea helpmeet and then getting skipped? Very emotionally traumatizing at the time. I don't know about Zach, but I bet Michaela is feeling it. Of course, I did not become a spinster and I got over it when I stopped participating in a church with little regard for women's feelings. And I don't think anybody should give up on the older Bates yet. But I do think it probably hurts.

I think if Alyssa marries a congressman's son Michelle might have conniptions. They may be tied for blessings, but with more married blessings and more current political connections, Kelly might be winning the Cold War here.

[Tom Slick]

I'd be willing to bet a cookie that in a short while or slipped into a future episode that the dslaves heard of the bates courtship and the goings on with Alyssa and either make a snide comment about it, or double down hard on how they like where they are and waiting (Not for Prince charming) but for GOD (DAD, GOTHARD) to select the perfect time (And Mate).

You know they have to be feeling the pressure and i have a funny feeling that they (dslaves) know more who is getting courted or who are in a relationship (Sorry dating with a purpose) than they lead us on to believe; they know more about that part of the outside world.

Here shortly we may...just may see the wheels start to fall off this traveling three ring circus. Or hear of the same old excuses explained in a new way. Only time will tell.

[AVENues]

Yeah, Kelly said that Alyssa and John are just getting to know each other and nothing is set in stone.

How interesting-Kelly and Gil's two daughters have found someone (er, well, Alyssa is getting to know John), yet, Boob and Mullet can't get any of their daughters to find someone.

Correction, they're refusing to allow them to court since they rely way too much on them to help raise the little ones.

There you go!

I was looking at Jana in the ice cream sharing video and I wondered, how come such a gorgeous young woman hasn't found anyone that's interested in her?

She's not only beautiful, she's intelligent - in a fundy way - and graceful. Jill is just a sugarbag of tee-hees and giggles, Jessa's arrogant and b*tchy, and Jinger has got a terrible attitude in general.

[pudding]

Jim Bob said on some episode(not sure which one) that he gets lots of letter every week from guys asking to court his daughters.........bot time one of them left home!!!

If I remember correctly, Jessa then replied "... and they were all weirdos!"

I just think they know, that they have more money than some 20+ guy is going to have when they marry off, they get around, see the world and there is no need to be married to Davilla or Smugs who keeps them at home in some old small house. I think it will be a looong time until some Jslave gets married!

To the Bateses: I really like Alyssas dress! I would have chosen something other than a heart-symbol on my "belt", but overall it's cute! And the defrauding sheer top and bottom? Nice!

[Irishy]

I'm liking the Bateses more and more. Less bullshit than the Duggars.

[Markie]

The older Bates kids were on the Santorum election campaign and might have met the Webster family there. Are the Websters ATI or VF or just really conservative Baptist?

[xReems]

It looks like the Webster family approve of Gothard and his messed up views. Sad, I was hoping Alyssa would be the one to get away but it appears father Daniel Webster believes Gothard's beliefs are the truth.

http://www.talk2action.org/story/2010/10/4/123711/633

Not breaking the link because it's a news article.