Rebeccaleventy got her house all did up for Christmas!

[Triplet3]

I believe she's upset with FJ crowd

hiswayserves-hiswayserves.blogspot.com/2012/12/i-have-something-to-say.html

I don't get the impression she's come across FJ. In the blog post she says she's received an upsetting blog comment. By the sounds of it, I doubt the comment was an FJ-er, because I don't think many people on here would go to someone else's blog and post such a deliberately unkind comment, particularly about the possibility of parental abuse and her, her mother and sisters' appearances. Also, if she did actually come on FJ and read threads about herself and her family, she'd see that many FJ-ers think kindly of her, and that posters snarking on her appearance or making unfounded claims about abuse are usually (and rightly, in my personal opinion) smacked down.

Personally, I have commented on her blog a couple of times, but I always steer clear of posting about religion or anything negative about her family. I aim to demonstrate that secular people can be just as pleasant as religious people (she's probably been told the opposite all her life).

Poor Rebecca. She is one of the fundies I most wish could escape fundiedom. She does seem to have a kind heart, and so clearly loves her family. Too bad her parents won't ever tone down their fundieism. Anyway, good for her for standing up to whoever wrote the comment.

[Guest Anonymous]

I would guess she is reading here. I saw the comment on her blog suggesting she had been abused at the time it happened (close to when it was discussed here, around this time last year). I have not seen any other overtly nasty comments on her blog.

[contrary]

I kinda doubt it's a reaction to FJ. For one, the things that have upset her are not things we generally discuss. I know they've been touched on briefly, but they certainly aren't topics of the general conversation.

Second, if she HAS found and read FJ, I imagine she'd be indignant over much different things.

[moreorlessnu]

Rebecca might be a good match for one of the Arndt boys. She seems happy and outgoing like they are.

In her birthday wishes to her sister, it's interesting how she clarifies that they secrets they tell each other have to do with birthdays, Christmas and anniversaries.

[Closed Womb]

I see Rebecca as a bit of a pure soul too. She's a bit simple, but seems to have a good soul. As someone else mentioned she likely has the same crappy beliefs as other fundies but take her out of that situation I don't see her being judgmental and arrogant.

In some ways she would make the perfect fundie wife...but I think she deserves better. I hope she meets a man who doesn't take advantage of her naivete.

I see her much the same way.

As for today's feisty post, I didn't see that as directed at FJ. She specifically mentioned her parent's wedding pictures (which, I assume, are the picture-of-pictures we see in one of the photos.) Except for someone mentioning that they look taped to the wall, no one here mentioned anything about the parent's looks, weight, makeup, etc. (unless something has been deleted.) I'm glad she is standing up for her family; of course, having a spine is another thing that disqualifies her from becoming a Maxwell bride.

PS -- the decorations seem homey, pleasant, and they are obviously enjoyed by the inhabitants of the home. Merry Christmas, Rebecca!

[Bbfamteam]

Good for her! Seeing a little bit of spark like that gives me hope for her. No way would any of the maxwell girls be allowed to post something like that even if it was to defend their parents or their own personal choices. She is definitely too good for most of the stuck up fundies snarked on here.

[snarkykitty]

Off topic, but I cannot remember, for the life of me, the name of the Wilkerson's blog. Can anyone help?

[Patsy]

hiswayserves-hiswayserves.blogspot.com

[lilith]

I think it must be in response to blog comments, not FJ.

Rebecca is the object of a lot more warmth and understanding here than any other fundie I can think of. I really doubt that she would read her threads here and see malice - for every not so nice comment about her frumpers and the dynamics of her family and the relative poverty they live in, there are at least ten expressing sympathy and understanding and trying to make her see that she's far to good for a Maxwell groom.

[Guest Anonymous]

I dunno. She does have a tendency to post 'late' blogs, eg posting about anniversaries and celebrations a long time after they have happened. I think she has been mulling this over for a while and something just tipped her over the edge.

[flojo]

It's nice to see her have gumption. I have no idea whether it's a reaction from here or elsewhere.

Rebecca, if you do read here, you are far, far, far too good for a maxwell.

[fundiefun]

For as poor as they are they truly come off as a sweet family and Rebecca seems like a genuinely nice girl and I'm glad she will stick up for herself about how she chooses to dress. I really do hope she sees past the Maxwell facade because in Steve's mind Rebecca and her family are beneath him and I can't imagine Steve wanting to even "fellowship" or accept hospitality from them like they have done with other families on their book tours/speaking engagements.

[WonderingInWA]

I'm guessing Rebecca does read here. She seems to have curtailed her excessive use of exclamation points to some degree and I think she probably read about it here. And when she posted the photos of her parents vow renewal and those awful super shiny dresses she and her sister wore, I think that's probably what she's referring to mostly when she talks about saying things about her family. I dunno. And I'm not backing down on that one -- those dresses were awful, no matter how nice she is.

[mirele]

If she is truly choosing to not wear make-up and dress that way because that is what she likes, than good for her. But with so many of these families it is hard to tell if they are really choosing that or dressing that way because they know their parents would disown them if they dress any other way.

Rebecca, please if you are reading here, run far, far, far, far away from the Maxwells. Steve will suck all the life out of you. You can do so much better than a Maxwell. You are too good for them.

I don't wear makeup (never have) and grew my hair waist-length even though my father considered it "unprofessional." He changed his mind because I was keeping it pulled back in a half braid and he thought it looked cool and complicated. :) And yes, even if you're an adult, your parents still think they can tell you how to dress. My dad now has memory issues and I wish he would razz me about my hair or dress, because that's just the way he was. But he doesn't. :(

Anyway, if Rebecca made the choice not to wear makeup and dress the way she does on her own, more power to her. That's what feminism is, folks, the right of women to make choices about our own lives. They don't have to be OUR choices.

[precious_one]

I use to wear make up every day but not anymore. If woman do not want to wear that don't have too and I don't think it makes us less feminine.

[MissSeptember]

I think Rebecca would look beautiful with some side swept bangs and coverup under her dark eye circles. She has a great smile and I love her hair color. I see potential.

[WonderingInWA]

I think Rebecca would look beautiful with some side swept bangs and coverup under her dark eye circles. She has a great smile and I love her hair color. I see potential.

Yes, the dark circles under her eyes need something. Her mother has them, too. I'm guessing it is the result of poor nutrition? I don't know. She takes a lot of photos of the desserts they make, but I just wonder what they eat for real food.

[Guest Anonymous]

Meh. She's fine as she is and I'm glad she is telling her detractors to piss off.

[SisiL78]

Meh. She's fine as she is and I'm glad she is telling her detractors to piss off.

here here. Yes, It would benefit her to be a teency bit more vain. But, if that's not how she rolls then whatever.

FWIW there are a lot of reasons one can have dark circle or eyelids. My FH has darkened eyelids, its a subtle symptom of a genetic condition. Dark circle really could be something she cannot help. Or it could be fatigue or stress.

I get the impression that she's stressed out, she has the spark of someone who wants bigger and better things but is in the fundy box and can't get out. If she's reading here I hope she can find a place in the world for herself. I really think that she could channel her cake interest into a job at a bakery, or to be a bakery owner herself.

[theologyofyourface]

Yes, the dark circles under her eyes need something. Her mother has them, too. I'm guessing it is the result of poor nutrition? I don't know. She takes a lot of photos of the desserts they make, but I just wonder what they eat for real food.

Eh, dark circles could be a lot of things. My youngest sister and I both have severe chronic allergies and we have those circles under our eyes--the doctors call them an "allergy sheen." They get better when we keep up with our allergy shots and worse when we don't, but they never go away completely. And I don't bother to do anything about them, really.

[ceg045]

With Rebeccaleventy, her and her family's physical appearance never particularly bothered me. Yeah, I blinked a little at some of their fashion choices, but that's pretty much par for the course in my perusal of fundie blogs.

What bothers me about her is that she seems to seems to have the naive, head-in-the-clouds mindset of a six year old, but she's, what, 19 or 20? She seems to be another one of those fundie women who live in infinite little girl land until her "prince" comes along. I guess I don't see the "spunk" that others speak of--I just see it as her lashing out against mean people. Not that I'm using "mean people" flippantly--if people are ragging on her or her family's physical appearance, they are mean. But most people would get angry if their family and lifestyle were being attacked; I see that quality as being distinct from "spunk." I just think it's a little sad that, at a time when she should be out in the world and enjoying young adulthood, she still seems to be in Disney princess phase.

[Annette]

I have bad dark circles under my eyes for no discernible reason. My nutrition is fine, the appearance doesn't change with variances in sleep, and I only have mild seasonal allergies. I wear concealer nearly 24/7.

[Ex 2x2]

I also have horrible dark circles under my eyes. I've tried so many different concealers. (Any recommendation?) I always thought it was just genetic as my dad has them too, but once when I was at the allergist, my dr commented on my "Allergy Shiners." They bug me but hey, there are worse things.

I don't know that Rebecca's family is as poor as people here say. (Do we know that?) They might just have simple tastes. They seem to have plenty of food, money for cakes and desserts, money for fishing and parties with their friends. The "poor" thing is so relative anyway. To a lot of people, they would be considered rich b/c they have shelter, food, etc.

I missed the abuse allegations. What gave that impression? You obviously never know what goes on behind closed doors, but I don't get that vibe from them at all. Honestly, her parents seem very loving. She obviously loves them. As others have said, I like that they decorate for holidays, have parties, celebrate bday's, etc. They also clearly love their friends and their church.

I wasn't a fan of the wedding attire either, and I'm sure I snarked on it, but hey, Rebecca, who cares what I think? It was a special day for your family.

[Pretzel]

The anonymous who first referred to "a website yada yada (=aka FJ)" in the comments section of Rebecca's blog obviously lacks reading comprehension. Rebecca never talked about a website or FreeJinger in particular. She's obviously been receiving a nasty e-Mail (as can be seen in her father's comment) as well as nasty comments on her blog for some time now. We'll never know if any FreeJingerite was involved in this but the comments section now totally reminds me of ZsuZsu's blog: It's always the nasty, filthy FJ'ites that are at fault, although Rebecca apparently didn't even know about "us" and was certainly not talking about us in her blogpost. :| Am I the only one bothered by this?

ETA: Apart from that, Rebecca did a great job standing up for herself and her parents. I like that she voiced her anger so aptly but thoughtfully and respectfully.

[ncb]

I am also proud of Rebecca for her post, it is something a Maxwell girl would never be allowed to do and many other fundie girls would ever bother to do. I think the whole discussion also speaks to the relative autonomy she has with her blog and that speaks well of her parents. Indeed, the comments are full of references that would never see the light of day on the Maxwell blog, supportive comments from lesbians, comments from people who clearly do not identify as any form of Christian, invitations to post to this list etc. Her father has clearly read the comments as he posted his own supportive comment after most of the comments had already been posted. I feel badly that people criticized her family, whatever problems we may have with their beliefs and politics, comments about their appearance are sizist and classist and completely unfounded speculations about abuse are really cruel and damaging. If we really care about this girl, we need to be more careful and considerate. She is not Steve Maxwell, or JB Duggar or any of the other leaders of this movement and neither is her family.