Ungodly pumpkins

[Deleted07]

NOT SAFE FOR WORK:

[JaChelle Sugar]

Here is an angel holding a jack o' lantern:

Time for the fundies to explode like Landru! :D

Haha! If only it was as easy to get rid of fundies as it was to shut down Landru.

[DarkAnts]

Growing up I had a jewish friend who's family told her that christmas was not a holiday they celebrated. They started to tell her the reasons for that at an age appropriate level when she was 6. Same went for christmas. The explained everything on a level she could understand. Every year, she understood more and more. She finally made her own decison regarind it at age 17 when she went tick or treating for unicef.

I dont understand the point in calling them ungodly pumpkins. Carving pumpkins is a fun tradition like dressing up and going free candy. No stain worship involved. Yes, it has pagan roots but you don't have to go with those roots to have a good time. I have seen more then a few pieces of artwork this year, All of then are on pumpkins.

Its one thing to say that your family chooses not to celebrate it. Its another thing to demonize it. I think that demonizing it dose more harm then good. But then again, that sums up most of my problems with findi families. Its ok if they judge a holiday or tradition. But you better watch out if you try to pull the same thing. They will flash that religious perscution card faster then you can count to 2.

[Minerva]

A pumpkin is just a type of squash. You can carve into it but you could carve "ungodly" scenes into a unripe tomato, or an apple or a watermelon. Gives me an idea for a backyard cookout. Wait until I bring out my ungodly watermelon!

You can use pumpkins and watermelons as receptacles for alcoholic beverages. You know, if you want to make them really ungodly.

Thanks a lot guys, now I'm looking up dirty jack-o-lanterns instead of doing my homework...

[Minerva]

NOT SAFE FOR WORK:

Also NSFW.

Eta here's another:

[Deleted07]

:clap: awesome Minerva! :dance:

[anniebgood]

My daughter is more of a sci fi pumpkin carver.....

SFW

[Trynn]

My daughter is more of a sci fi pumpkin carver.....

SFW

That is impressive

[PennySycamore]

My daughter is more of a sci fi pumpkin carver.....

SFW

I should show that to my daughter. I already sent her a Dach Vader (doxie wearing a Darth Vader helmet) Halloween card.

[Ex 2x2]

This time of year I always have several fundy friends post on facebook about this evil wicked holiday. (I read it as I'm digging into my kids' trick or treat candy...oops!) Anyway this showed up today, from one of my fundy friends. It's by none other than Doug Phillips (is a tool.)

visionforum.com/news/onlineemail/vision-forum/2012/10/26_holloween/

[Minerva]

This time of year I always have several fundy friends post on facebook about this evil wicked holiday. (I read it as I'm digging into my kids' trick or treat candy...oops!) Anyway this showed up today, from one of my fundy friends. It's by none other than Doug Phillips (is a tool.)

visionforum.com/news/onlineemail/vision-forum/2012/10/26_holloween/

Teehee. Doug Phillips is a tool, and his grammar is the scariest thing I've seen this Halloween.

Those who “hate evil†are very scary to a secular society that fears man more than God. They are scary because they dare to declare that there are absolute standards by which society must be governed

No, they're scary because their standards are fascist.

They are scary because, if they are successful, industries like Hollywood that make billions of dollars by promoting ungodly fear will lose their influence.

Except they're completely unable to make that happen, making them laughable in this way, but not scary.

They are scary because such people will not be swayed by political candidates who use fear as a tool for manipulation.

Irony: these are the people who believe Obama's health care act will lead to "death panels".

Let me sum up Doug Phillip is a tool 's tips for being scary this Halloween (all of which he declares the scariest, leading me to wonder if he knows what it means when you end a word in "-est"):

1. Take every light-hearted mention of "evil" very seriously. This will make you seem scary, but in a "the man has some problems sweetie, just stay close to me and don't make eye contact" way, rather than in a "oh noes, this guy is such a threat to our sinful way of life!" way.

2. Don't be afraid of scientifically proven threats such as overpopulation or global warming - they are lies made up by politicians (who apparently have the power to control everything scientists say and publish). Fear is ungodly, presumably until the next time Doug Phillips is a tool decides to use it to get more business spread his ministry.

3. Celebrate Martin Luther and the birth of John Calvin. Oooooooo!

4. Refuse to watch horror movies from Hollywood. I take this to mean Doug Phillips is a tool supports independent horror film producers. Good for him.

5. Have lots of babies and indoctrinate them. This will make Halloween go away.

Who needs Halloween when you play dress-up year round anyway, right Dougie? Doug Phillips is a tool.

[FeministShrew]

Irony: these are the people who believe Obama's health care act will lead to "death panels".

This exactly. Just last week my college educated fundie sister told our elderly, nursing home patient mom that if she gets sick the death panels won't let her have treatment.

I explained that there is no such animal as a "death panel" & sis's response was basically, "Is too, my pastor says so."

And she works for an insurance underwriter, so she should no better.

Next year I'm going to make my Halloween display even more evil, just for the fundies' enjoyment. :twisted:

[bellpepper]

They could always make a "Christian Pumpkin", based off this poem (author unknown):

"I am a Jack O' Lantern

My light will shine so bright

For I am a Christian pumpkin

My symbols tell what's right.

My nose is like the cross

on which our Savior died

To set us free from sin

We need no longer hide.

My mouth is like a fish

The whole wide world to show

That Christians live in this house

And love their Savior so!

The story starts at Christmas

My eyes are like the star

That shone on Baby Jesus

And wise men saw from far

My color it is orange

Just like the big bright sun

That rose on Easter Day

Along with Gods' own Son.

And so on Halloween

Let's set our pumpkins out

And tell the trick or treaters

What Gods' love is all about!"

[FeministShrew]

They could always make a "Christian Pumpkin", based off this poem (author unknown):

"I am a Jack O' Lantern

My light will shine so bright

For I am a Christian pumpkin

My symbols tell what's right.

My nose is like the cross

on which our Savior died

To set us free from sin

We need no longer hide.

My mouth is like a fish

The whole wide world to show

That Christians live in this house

And love their Savior so!

The story starts at Christmas

My eyes are like the star

That shone on Baby Jesus

And wise men saw from far

My color it is orange

Just like the big bright sun

That rose on Easter Day

Along with Gods' own Son.

And so on Halloween

Let's set our pumpkins out

And tell the trick or treaters

What Gods' love is all about!"

That sounds like one freaky looking pumpkin! Somebody find a pic of one, please!

[FeministShrew]

That's just...wrong, somehow. I will stick to my ungodly pumpkins, thank you very much.

[Minerva]

They could always make a "Christian Pumpkin", based off this poem (author unknown):

"I am a Jack O' Lantern

My light will shine so bright

For I am a Christian pumpkin

My symbols tell what's right.

My nose is like the cross

on which our Savior died

To set us free from sin

We need no longer hide.

My mouth is like a fish

The whole wide world to show

That Christians live in this house

And love their Savior so!

The story starts at Christmas

My eyes are like the star

That shone on Baby Jesus

And wise men saw from far

My color it is orange

Just like the big bright sun

That rose on Easter Day

Along with Gods' own Son.

And so on Halloween

Let's set our pumpkins out

And tell the trick or treaters

What Gods' love is all about!"

That sounds way too tolerant for most of the fundies we snark on.

[Deleted11]

Man, I'm going to have to get in on the sexual pumpkin trend. I've never actually carved a pumpkin - ever, even as a kid. It'll give me a little motivation!

[thoughtful]

Eeeeeeeeeeeek!

Sheesh, warn a person before posting something that scary, will ya? ;)

[curlykate]

I am absolutely LOVING the ungodly pumpkins! So glad I didn't just skip over the thread.

As for the Christian pumpkin, it's......interesting. I'll give it that.

[JesusFightClub]

I am absolutely LOVING the ungodly pumpkins! So glad I didn't just skip over the thread.

As for the Christian pumpkin, it's......interesting. I'll give it that.

QFT! Even my mum loved the ungodly pumpkins.

But the Christian one...what happened there? It's scarier than this entire thread!

[BelieveinScience]

Did anyone witness any ungodly pumpkins tonight while trick or treating??

[Minerva]

Did anyone witness any ungodly pumpkins tonight while trick or treating??

As in silhouette porn pumpkins? I feel like that kind of thing would get you a visit from the cops. If I ever host a Halloween party, I'll make a point of having ungodly pumpkins. I bet I could make a nice vulva pumpkin.

ETA holy crap, it's already been done! myspace.com/ladyfestbmore/photos/12265349#%7B%22ImageId%22%3A12265349%7D

ETA don't google vulva pumpkin safe search off. Pumpkin erotica is a thing. My eyes.

[JaChelle Sugar]

This time of year I always have several fundy friends post on facebook about this evil wicked holiday. (I read it as I'm digging into my kids' trick or treat candy...oops!) Anyway this showed up today, from one of my fundy friends. It's by none other than Doug Phillips (is a tool.)

visionforum.com/news/onlineemail/vision-forum/2012/10/26_holloween/

Like I think to myself evey time my pastor's sermon gets anywhere near mentioning purity, "this oughta be good".

Unrelated: there was a local church sign advertising it's Halloween alternative 'Hallelujah Night', described as 'an evening of spiritual fun for the whole family'.

Give me goblins and tiny Dementor's and zombie skeleton soldiers begging for candy while half-watching a horror movie with a mate any day.

*riffles