The nearly 16 year old Wizzy Arndt & her stuffed animal

[wild little fox]

In a lot of ways my mother has done the same to me and her religious beliefs have nothing to do with it. She is controlling and tells those who choose to be in her life how it is going to be and that is it. I struggle constantly to have my own identity separate from hers. I'm locked in because I have an adult brother, two years younger than me, with autism and I do not/cannot trust just anyone to take care of him. I can't leave him with mom, cannot take him with me because I have not the means to take care of myself let alone another human being, and I can't conceive of him being in a group home when I am the ONLY one on the planet who truly understands him.

I am seeking help to learn boundaries. Her health is ailing. So, I'm one of those SAHD, just not as fundy. I do have a boyfriend who loves very much, but I am not going to have him rescue me. If I can't do it then I'll just stay here. We are not getting married anyway.

If anyone who is in one of these situations, GET OUT while you still can, before your parent starts ailing and you will feel locked in out of obligation. In this economy, with my weight, age (nearly 45) and lack of skills, I am not employable. Don't be in my shoes! GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!!!

[MrsKay]

Here's the article. It's near the end of the "What I Look For" article. Weird.

http://www.famteam.com/waiting/#wilf

That's not it - how scary is that - the guy has several articles, from the looks of it, that go on about his obsession with his mother. :? Given that I can't find it on the AR site, or on the FamTeam site, I wonder if it's in the section that you have to pay to see. Which makes me wonder, who the hell would pay to read this kind of crap from a relatively unknown family???

[luckystone]

Actually good point, I know a few parents who keep their kids like this even though they aren't religious.

[thekate]

I mean ... WHY would single "ladies" take his advice to heart? It's preposterous to write something like. Are the Arndt boys trying to read up on what single "ladies" find attractive in men? Doubtful. I'm sure the Arndts feel that THEY have already achieved all of these things, and are patiently waiting for women to perfect themselves accordingly.

P.S. How charming! He wants her "keep a high price tag."

And childlike!

[nokidsmom]

Actually good point, I know a few parents who keep their kids like this even though they aren't religious.

Yep, I just learned that a high school classmate is still living with his mom (I think dad is deceased). He never moved out. He's 53. He's an only child and even back in high school, I saw his folks were overly protective. He was interested in going out with me but had to introduce me to his folks first; I could tell I didn't "pass" the test because nothing came of it. Which is just as well.

[precious_one]

I have known many people that didn't want to get married but they moved out and made lives for themselves.

[freejoytoo]

The whole situation creeps me out but what gets me most is the way Wizzy's older brothers gleefully talk about accompaning her on her first date. It goes way beyond being a protective older brother, they are creepily obsessed with their sister's 'purity'.

[Naga Viper]

Read (or skimmed, really, fundies never edit their shit properly) the WILF article. He lost me with "fairer sex" in the second paragraph. Who says shit like that anymore? Oh, right, people who are still unmarried virgins living at home seven years later. :?

[truthteller]

Maybe you mean THIS BIT OF INSANITY posted on the Above Rubies web site...

.

.

.

I Want A Wife Like Her

by Mark Arndt

"One, two, three, four, five, six." At first, she had quietly but was raising the volume and was more excited as he counted. His fingers were invisible marks in the air. "Seven, eight, nine, ten." His eyes widened, and began to speak with greater emphasis. "Eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen!" He paused, opened his mouth a little more and took another look at the photo of our family. "Fourteen?" He exclaimed. "Yes, it is a good start," he said mockingly. I love saying that phrase. Then he made a sign with his hand to get the attention of their colleagues. In an instant, two employees were already seeing the photo and count for themselves while moving his head in amazement.

I stand there shining. I take any excuse to look the picture of my family. When the woman who attended the supermarket asked me what I wanted to surprise you for thirty boxes of cereal, I could not resist the opportunity and took the photo. The row behind me stretched but three employees were given no consideration.

"Your Mom", said one, "he looks so young." "To think that has kept her sanity!" Another said: "Let me tell you that I grew up a child of two years and with that I had. Your mom must be a saint! "" Do not know how you do! "Said another chuckling and raising his hands in the air.

Finally finished scanning the merchandise. The total bill was high. I opened my bag and said with a face as expressionless as he could: "I would pay twenty cents coins, right?"

I love belonging to a large family. I love my Mom and I love when people admire her. When people hear sidewalk of our family - and after they recover consciousness-they want to know one thing: What is the secret to Mom? I used to think that my mother must have been born happier than others. After all, he never complained, never felt sorry for herself and always smiling no matter how difficult the situation. Maybe it was one of those rare individuals who enjoy losing sleep at night, be nibbled for breastfed babies, and change countless diapers.

One day while I was dealing with a full diaper I thought of something. "I do not want to do this." I frowned and thought, "Maybe my mom should do this. She already accustomed. "Suddenly I realized," Maybe she does not like changing diapers. "" Nonsense, "I said to myself," if it did it would not run always smiling. Also never complains. You can bet that if I do not like something, I will not complain and everyone will know - as I was about to do. "

That day I realized that my mother's constant joy, gratitude and appreciation was not something I was born. Rather, it was a decision she had made. At times, a very difficult decision, sometimes painful but always brave. Because she chooses to focus his thoughts on God and others, and not itself, is that it can stay above any situation that crosses him. No matter how high are the waves of life, his attitude always makes her stay afloat. He has chosen to be joyful when I could complain, and might well feel grateful when self-pity. His heart has become a fountain of youth, love and life. It only makes her happier, but makes the whole family happier.

Growing up, I knew one thing. I could not get away with anything. If you did something wrong is going to punish me, and it was. This consistency in discipline gave us a much needed security to me and my brothers. Mom was unfailingly tender and loving, even when corrected us, but also unfailingly firm. The truth was like a brick wall that surrounded and protected me. I only hurt when I crashed it. As I kept within limits, was safe, free and safe.

That's what I admire so much Mom. She is as strong as his words. She punished us more when she was angry. Nor punished us less when she was tired or exhausted. I absolved of any fault to not look bad in front of others. It acted more harshly when we were alone. She was fair, but always steadfast love.

I do not see Mom like that superwoman that could effortlessly do anything. Rather, I see a human being unselfish and loving amazingly chose to get my brothers and me first. She is smart enough, clever and hardworking to have been what he wanted and have done an outstanding manner. Instead, he chose to be a mom - my Mom. Only remains for me to pray that one day I can find a wife like her.

MARK ARNDT

mark@famteam.com

[lilith]

Maybe you mean THIS BIT OF INSANITY posted on the Above Rubies web site...

.

.

.

I Want A Wife Like Her

by Mark Arndt

"One, two, three, four, five, six." At first, she had quietly but was raising the volume and was more excited as he counted. His fingers were invisible marks in the air. "Seven, eight, nine, ten." His eyes widened, and began to speak with greater emphasis. "Eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen!" He paused, opened his mouth a little more and took another look at the photo of our family. "Fourteen?" He exclaimed. "Yes, it is a good start," he said mockingly. I love saying that phrase. Then he made a sign with his hand to get the attention of their colleagues. In an instant, two employees were already seeing the photo and count for themselves while moving his head in amazement.

I stand there shining. I take any excuse to look the picture of my family. When the woman who attended the supermarket asked me what I wanted to surprise you for thirty boxes of cereal, I could not resist the opportunity and took the photo. The row behind me stretched but three employees were given no consideration.

"Your Mom", said one, "he looks so young." "To think that has kept her sanity!" Another said: "Let me tell you that I grew up a child of two years and with that I had. Your mom must be a saint! "" Do not know how you do! "Said another chuckling and raising his hands in the air.

Finally finished scanning the merchandise. The total bill was high. I opened my bag and said with a face as expressionless as he could: "I would pay twenty cents coins, right?"

I love belonging to a large family. I love my Mom and I love when people admire her. When people hear sidewalk of our family - and after they recover consciousness-they want to know one thing: What is the secret to Mom? I used to think that my mother must have been born happier than others. After all, he never complained, never felt sorry for herself and always smiling no matter how difficult the situation. Maybe it was one of those rare individuals who enjoy losing sleep at night, be nibbled for breastfed babies, and change countless diapers.

One day while I was dealing with a full diaper I thought of something. "I do not want to do this." I frowned and thought, "Maybe my mom should do this. She already accustomed. "Suddenly I realized," Maybe she does not like changing diapers. "" Nonsense, "I said to myself," if it did it would not run always smiling. Also never complains. You can bet that if I do not like something, I will not complain and everyone will know - as I was about to do. "

That day I realized that my mother's constant joy, gratitude and appreciation was not something I was born. Rather, it was a decision she had made. At times, a very difficult decision, sometimes painful but always brave. Because she chooses to focus his thoughts on God and others, and not itself, is that it can stay above any situation that crosses him. No matter how high are the waves of life, his attitude always makes her stay afloat. He has chosen to be joyful when I could complain, and might well feel grateful when self-pity. His heart has become a fountain of youth, love and life. It only makes her happier, but makes the whole family happier.

Growing up, I knew one thing. I could not get away with anything. If you did something wrong is going to punish me, and it was. This consistency in discipline gave us a much needed security to me and my brothers. Mom was unfailingly tender and loving, even when corrected us, but also unfailingly firm. The truth was like a brick wall that surrounded and protected me. I only hurt when I crashed it. As I kept within limits, was safe, free and safe.

That's what I admire so much Mom. She is as strong as his words. She punished us more when she was angry. Nor punished us less when she was tired or exhausted. I absolved of any fault to not look bad in front of others. It acted more harshly when we were alone. She was fair, but always steadfast love.

I do not see Mom like that superwoman that could effortlessly do anything. Rather, I see a human being unselfish and loving amazingly chose to get my brothers and me first. She is smart enough, clever and hardworking to have been what he wanted and have done an outstanding manner. Instead, he chose to be a mom - my Mom. Only remains for me to pray that one day I can find a wife like her.

MARK ARNDT

mark@famteam.com

Um, that's barely readable. Mama Ardnt's SOTDRT is sorely lacking in English, no matter how it excels in softball. How on earth can this man work as a court transcriber?

[Levon]

I'm pretty sure it's a retranslation.

[lilith]

I'm pretty sure it's a retranslation.

That makes more sense

[gustava]

I'm pretty sure it's a retranslation.

I'm confused. A translation of what?

[ShadowyOne]

What in the ever-loving fuck? Not only is the mommy-obsession exceedingly creepy, the grammar made me want to weep. I know fundies abhor editing, but I couldn't follow the pronouns or verb tenses at all. When he uses the pronoun "he," does Mark mean God? And if so, then shouldn't "He" be capitalized? Oh, dear, I'm off to find some wine...

[Guest Anonymous]

The whole situation creeps me out but what gets me most is the way Wizzy's older brothers gleefully talk about accompaning her on her first date. It goes way beyond being a protective older brother, they are creepily obsessed with their sister's 'purity'.

They're not content with fucking up their own private lives, they're going to make damn sure that Wizzy doesn't have one either. The abiding principle is "If we gotta suffer, SHE gotta suffer".

[Levon]

I'm confused. A translation of what?

Spanish, evidently: aboverubies.org/articles/foreign-languages/spanish-language/691-conoce-a-la-familia-arndt

It was probably plugged into an internet translator, hence the pronoun confusion and wonky sentence structure.

[ceg045]

They're not content with fucking up their own private lives, they're going to make damn sure that Wizzy doesn't have one either. The abiding principle is "If we gotta suffer, SHE gotta suffer".

I dunno, if I thought that was the case, I'd be almost relieved. Schadenfreude is almost a show of real, normal-ish human emotion. I honestly get the sense that they're legitimately excited about it. Which is infinitely creepier in my mind.

[SisiL78]

why would they write it in Spanish the use a translation before publishing it online? Even if they did do that it makes no sense as to how a bunch of English speakers could not easily correct the glaring mistakes.... even the duggars and Sarah Maxwell can write better than that

[Morton Fan]

Spanish, evidently: aboverubies.org/articles/foreign-languages/spanish-language/691-conoce-a-la-familia-arndt

It was probably plugged into an internet translator, hence the pronoun confusion and wonky sentence structure.

I couldn't make it all the way through. I wish the English version were readily available ... it sure seemed riveting!

[MrsKay]

Maybe you mean THIS BIT OF INSANITY posted on the Above Rubies web site...

.

.

.

I Want A Wife Like Her

by Mark Arndt

"One, two, three, four, five, six." At first, she had quietly but was raising the volume and was more excited as he counted. His fingers were invisible marks in the air. "Seven, eight, nine, ten." His eyes widened, and began to speak with greater emphasis. "Eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen!" He paused, opened his mouth a little more and took another look at the photo of our family. "Fourteen?" He exclaimed. "Yes, it is a good start," he said mockingly. I love saying that phrase. Then he made a sign with his hand to get the attention of their colleagues. In an instant, two employees were already seeing the photo and count for themselves while moving his head in amazement.

I stand there shining. I take any excuse to look the picture of my family. When the woman who attended the supermarket asked me what I wanted to surprise you for thirty boxes of cereal, I could not resist the opportunity and took the photo. The row behind me stretched but three employees were given no consideration.

"Your Mom", said one, "he looks so young." "To think that has kept her sanity!" Another said: "Let me tell you that I grew up a child of two years and with that I had. Your mom must be a saint! "" Do not know how you do! "Said another chuckling and raising his hands in the air.

Finally finished scanning the merchandise. The total bill was high. I opened my bag and said with a face as expressionless as he could: "I would pay twenty cents coins, right?"

I love belonging to a large family. I love my Mom and I love when people admire her. When people hear sidewalk of our family - and after they recover consciousness-they want to know one thing: What is the secret to Mom? I used to think that my mother must have been born happier than others. After all, he never complained, never felt sorry for herself and always smiling no matter how difficult the situation. Maybe it was one of those rare individuals who enjoy losing sleep at night, be nibbled for breastfed babies, and change countless diapers.

One day while I was dealing with a full diaper I thought of something. "I do not want to do this." I frowned and thought, "Maybe my mom should do this. She already accustomed. "Suddenly I realized," Maybe she does not like changing diapers. "" Nonsense, "I said to myself," if it did it would not run always smiling. Also never complains. You can bet that if I do not like something, I will not complain and everyone will know - as I was about to do. "

That day I realized that my mother's constant joy, gratitude and appreciation was not something I was born. Rather, it was a decision she had made. At times, a very difficult decision, sometimes painful but always brave. Because she chooses to focus his thoughts on God and others, and not itself, is that it can stay above any situation that crosses him. No matter how high are the waves of life, his attitude always makes her stay afloat. He has chosen to be joyful when I could complain, and might well feel grateful when self-pity. His heart has become a fountain of youth, love and life. It only makes her happier, but makes the whole family happier.

Growing up, I knew one thing. I could not get away with anything. If you did something wrong is going to punish me, and it was. This consistency in discipline gave us a much needed security to me and my brothers. Mom was unfailingly tender and loving, even when corrected us, but also unfailingly firm. The truth was like a brick wall that surrounded and protected me. I only hurt when I crashed it. As I kept within limits, was safe, free and safe.

That's what I admire so much Mom. She is as strong as his words. She punished us more when she was angry. Nor punished us less when she was tired or exhausted. I absolved of any fault to not look bad in front of others. It acted more harshly when we were alone. She was fair, but always steadfast love.

I do not see Mom like that superwoman that could effortlessly do anything. Rather, I see a human being unselfish and loving amazingly chose to get my brothers and me first. She is smart enough, clever and hardworking to have been what he wanted and have done an outstanding manner. Instead, he chose to be a mom - my Mom. Only remains for me to pray that one day I can find a wife like her.

MARK ARNDT

mark@famteam.com

THAT'S the one! Where was it? I looked in all of the categories and totally missed it! There was also a piece written by each of the parents in that issue, about the building of the family home (by the mother), and about how wonderful Mama Arndt is (by the father). I could actually translate it pretty closely to the original - my memory is really good when it comes to things that I've read.

[MrsKay]

Okay - here's the roughly translated version (that's actually readable), as close to the original as I can recall. I put () around the one part I couldn't figure out.

"One, two, three, four, five, six." At first, she had spoken quietly but was raising her voice and was getting more excited as she counted. Her fingers were making invisible marks in the air. "Seven, eight, nine, ten." Her eyes widened, and she began to speak with greater emphasis. "Eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen!" She paused, opened her mouth a little more and took another look at the photo of our family. "Fourteen?" she exclaimed. "Yep, it's a start," I said with a smirk. I love saying that phrase. Then she made a sign with her hand to get the attention of their colleagues. In an instant, two employees were seeing the photo and counting for themselves while shaking their heads in amazement.

I stood there, beaming. I take any excuse to show the picture of my family. When the woman who ran the supermarket checkout asked me why I needed thirty boxes of cereal, I could not resist the opportunity and took out the photo. The line behind me stretched but three employees paid no attention.

"Your Mom", said one, "she looks so young." "She even looks like she has kept her sanity!" Another said: "Let me tell you that I raised a two year old and that was enough for me. Your mom must be a saint! " "I don't know how she does it!" said another, chuckling and raising her hands in the air.

Finally she finished scanning the merchandise. The total bill was high. I opened my wallet and said with as straight of a face as I could: "I would like to pay in pennies, is that okay?"

I love belonging to a large family. I love my Mom and I love when people admire her. When people hear of our family - and after they regain consciousness-they want to know one thing: What is Mom's secret? I used to think that my mother must have been born happier than others. After all, she never complained, never felt sorry for herself and is always smiling no matter how difficult the situation. Maybe she was one of those rare individuals who enjoy losing sleep at night, being gnawed on by nursing babies, and changing countless diapers.

One day while I was faced with an epic diaper I thought of something. "I do not want to do this." I frowned and thought, "Maybe my mom should do this. She's used to it. "Suddenly I realized," Maybe she does not like changing diapers. "" Nonsense, "I said to myself," if she didn't, she would not always run in smiling. Also, she never complains. You can bet that if I do not like something, I will complain and everyone will know - as I was about to do. "

That day I realized that my mother's constant joy, gratitude and appreciation was not something she was born with. Rather, it was a decision she had made. At times, a very difficult decision, sometimes painful but always brave. Because she chooses to focus her thoughts on God and others, and not herself, she is able to stay above any situation that crosses her. No matter how high are the waves of life, her attitude always makes her stay afloat. She has chosen to be joyful when I could complain, and might well feel justified in self-pity. Her heart has become a fountain of youth, love and life. It not only makes her happier, but makes the whole family happier.

Growing up, I knew one thing. I could not get away with anything. If you did something wrong Mom was going to punish me, and she did. This consistency in discipline gave a much needed security to me and my brothers. Mom was unfailingly tender and loving, even when correcting us, but also unfailingly firm. The truth was like a brick wall that surrounded and protected me. It only hurt when I crashed through it. As long as I kept within limits, I was free and safe.

That's what I admire so much about Mom. She is as strong as her words. She never punished us more when she was angry, nor punished us less when she was tired or exhausted. (I absolved of any fault to not look bad in front of others.) She never acted more harshly when we were alone. She was fair, but always steadfast in her love.

I do not see Mom like that superwoman that could effortlessly do anything. Rather, I see a human being unselfish and loving amazingly choose to put my brothers and me first. She is smart enough, clever and hardworking to have been whatever she wanted and have done an outstanding job. Instead, she chose to be a mom - my Mom. I only pray that one day I can find a wife like her.

[Morton Fan]

Okay - here's the roughly translated version (that's actually readable), as close to the original as I can recall. I put () around the one part I couldn't figure out.

Pretty great Mrs. Kay, thank you! Very impressive (to you, that is ... NOT Mark). :)

[Morton Fan]

Pretty great Mrs. Kay, thank you! Very impressive (to you, that is ... NOT Mark). :)

How about "I pray one day that I can be more like that" instead of praying for his wife to be like that?

[B5SnowDog]

I'm confused. A translation of what?

It looks like someone ran it through Babelfish twice, like English-to-AnotherLanguage-to-English.

[nokidsmom]

I dunno, if I thought that was the case, I'd be almost relieved. Schadenfreude is almost a show of real, normal-ish human emotion. I honestly get the sense that they're legitimately excited about it. Which is infinitely creepier in my mind.

The thought of all those guys following along on her first date is almost comical to imagine if it weren't so darn creepy. That poor girl will never get to date much less get married. What guy is going to put up with that?