The New Holy Bible is a giant washing sink. The Mortal Sins.

[Mark Dreher]

Mark, will you put it in my butt?

Sodomy is a "mortal sin".

With a man or with a woman.

That is a "poop shoot".

Made for poop.

And not a thingy.

[Shirley MacLaine]

I think it's, y'know, poop chute. So you won't put your thingy in it?

:(

[Mark Dreher]

I think it's, y'know, poop chute. So you won't put your thingy in it?

:(

I have inflicted that damage on women in my youth.

Before I was told it offends.

And now it is in The New Holy Bible.

And now it is totally.

VERBOTEN.

For men or women.

So the answer would be.

No.

[Shirley MacLaine]

I have inflicted that damage on women in my youth.

Before I was told it offends.

Was it good for you?

[Mark Dreher]

Was it good for you?

Nothing to write home about.

[Buzzard]

Naughty naughty.

The f word is now VERBOTEN.

Direct quote -

"And be as aware of this as you are of your next breath. God HATES HIS CHILDREN USING THE "F" WORD. It makes him cringe, and be assured that is a very very bad thing. You physically will not be allowed (AKA - "you will perish") to abuse the Father in that manner anymore. God already takes off up to one day from your life span for every time that you say the "F" word. He has to give a lesser sentence to some of you, you say it so often, you would not last out the week. One bar crawl and you would have to be put down. And in this new millennium, I would be amazed if there are any foul mouth liberals that live out the year.  God's mandate for me is "the worst will go first". Don't be one. Don't sound like one. Don't use the "F" word. Ever. Period."

Fuckity Fuck Fuck Fuckalot! I dont do barcrawl, but I do like it in the ass every now and then. :shhh:

[Shirley MacLaine]

Nothing to write home about.

I feel you. I've never wanted to write my parents to tell them about the hot anal I had last night, either.

[LynnKaboom]

This is fun.

I like posting like this.

Writing in free-verse poetry.

Although it get annoying to read.

Oh well.

[NurseShannon]

GOD!

I am gonna have to use the foe function just because I can't stand to read fragmented sentences! :ugeek:

[Sola]

I feel you. I've never wanted to write my parents to tell them about the hot anal I had last night, either.

*splurts juice down nose all over new forum*

[NurseShannon]

If I was smarter, I would write in Haiku..... :cry:

[Mark Dreher]

GOD!

I am gonna have to use the foe function just because I can't stand to read fragmented sentences! :ugeek:

I am not God.

Best friend.

Attendant.

Personal servant.

Of God.

And he makes me type this way.

Each line is an "epigram" poem.

A magic spell

Against evil.

[Sola]

Oh that's so much better. I do like the foe list.

[Mark Dreher]

Fuckity Fuck Fuck Fuckalot! I dont do barcrawl, but I do like it in the ass every now and then. :shhh:

That is a little sick.

And

You would be a very unusual woman.

To really like the rear better than the front.

[formergothardite]

Decided to put him on ignore because he is neither witty or amusing, just self-absorbed. He needs to go by-by.

[Mark Dreher]

Decided to put him on ignore because he is neither witty or amusing, just self-absorbed. He needs to go by-by.

I type what God tells me.

I barely read the words.

When I read it back several minutes later.

It tickles me.

As I barely remember them.

Point being.

They are God's words.

[ElijahsMama807]

:think:

I think

That

From now on

We should

All post

Like Mark Dreher

Even though

We'd be feeding

The troll.

:lol: j/k

To be honest here, I think this guy is the type that in his spare time --to quote comedian Ron White-- likes to roll his turds into little balls and eat Crayons. That or he ate a lot of paint chips as a kid. Off to add him to my foe list :eusa-whistle:

[Mark Dreher]

:think:

I think

That

From now on

We should

All post

Like Mark Dreher

Even though

We'd be feeding

The troll.

:lol: j/k

To be honest here, I think this guy is the type that in his spare time --to quote comedian Ron White-- likes to roll his turds into little balls and eat Crayons. That or he ate a lot of paint chips as a kid. Off to add him to my foe list :eusa-whistle:

Ron White is my hero also.

A comedian who drinks AND smokes during his act.

I would find someone a little less slippery.

To be my God.

[Mark Dreher]

If I was smarter, I would write in Haiku..... :cry:

God is real Nurse Shannon

[Mark Dreher]

Sorry Mark, but you're wrong. Here's something a bit closer to the truth:

"Behold, this was the guilt of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had pride, excess of food, and prosperous ease, but did not aid the poor and needy." -- Ezekiel 16:49

ETA: Oh, and Mark -- I'm genuinely curious as to what you think of this guy.

[Mark Dreher]

Sure, but I find it hard to believe the Messiah just jerks it to porn and trolls message boards.

Also, not all of us here are Christian and schooled in Biblical knowledge ;)

You have no idea what I do.

As I have never told you.

I have children.

Child.

One.

Matthew Joseph Dreher.

Matthew is a member of the Military Police.

He served a tour in Iraq.

Where he got a Purple Heart.

He is a big guy, like me.

I am six foot seven.

He is six foot seven.

He was a personal bodyguard for generals.

He was hit in the head with a brick.

And came back on his back.

But he is OK.

I am a breeder.

[Mark Dreher]

Awwww... our first carpet piddle. This is so CUTE!!! :dance:

:animals-dogrun:

whatever wrote:

"Seriously you need help. If you honestly believe that someone's sexuality, not saying grace and not going to church are worse than killing someone then your moral compass is seriously off and you probably need to seek professional help!

In fact I think that you are probably a very dangerous person that should get help as soon as possible. How long will it be before you murdering people for not going to church or not saying grace? After all they are greater crimes than murder - as you state in your post.

Seriously dude, seek help. You need it."

I think if you fail on anyone of these four issues.

It will preclude your admittance to Heaven.

A murderer, who has reconciled himself with God, and sits in a cell.

But says grace.

Has a thousand times better chance at Heaven.

Than a scot free liberal.

Who spits in God's face.

By consuming food.

Without saying grace.

[Buzzard]

For you to be god or his hand you don't know me very well at all! I'm the farthest thing from a liberal and I can pretty much guarantee I've seen more evil in my life than you ever will. I've sat inches from it, many times.

I think you really need to go see a psychiatrist and have yourself evaluated you deluded fuck.

[Mark Dreher]

For you to be god or his hand you don't know me very well at all! I'm the farthest thing from a liberal and I can pretty much guarantee I've seen more evil in my life than you ever will. I've sat inches from it, many times.

Such language Buzzard.

Have you tried decaff?

I don't remember calling you a liberal.

You may be thinking of someone else.

A "liberal" means "you threw the bible out the window".

It is a horrific term.

I do not use it lightly.

[Mark Dreher]

whatever wrote:

"Seriously you need help. If you honestly believe that someone's sexuality, not saying grace and not going to church are worse than killing someone then your moral compass is seriously off and you probably need to seek professional help!

In fact I think that you are probably a very dangerous person that should get help as soon as possible. How long will it be before you murdering people for not going to church or not saying grace? After all they are greater crimes than murder - as you state in your post.

Seriously dude, seek help. You need it."

I think if you fail on anyone of these four issues.

It will preclude your admittance to Heaven.

A murderer, who has reconciled himself with God, and sits in a cell.

But says grace.

Has a thousand times better chance at Heaven.

Than a scot free liberal.

Who spits in God's face.

By consuming food.

Without saying grace.

whatever wrote:

"Thanks, but you didn't answer my question. So, how do you know there are only four mortal sins, and these are them..?"

The others are more or less "optional".

God has discretion.

But on these four "lu lu's".

God only cuts one way.

You will never get past these buggers.