Breaking MAXWELL news/Liz cancelled the wedding to Joe

[jockosmom]

I'd also like to add, that while it's sad that Joseph and Elizabeth called off their wedding, I don't know these people from Adam. They put all their private family happenings on public display and preach that how they're living is the only way that's right. If they get snarked on, it's their own fault. Although, I suppose that since the parents control the family websites, Joseph and Elizabeth are sort of victims of their parents' egos.

My thoughts exactly. If you put everything out there on the internet because you think you're better than everyone else and everyone can benefit by following your example, and then you get snarked on, well, too bad, so sad.

[marmalade]

Apparently I have a lot to learn about being a troll.

But what do I know? I'm working on a Ph.D. in education from an accredited (online) university.

I'm entering the Master's program in Education at a top 15 school, also online. However, I lose nothing; the curriculum is identical to "live" courses, taught by the same faculty, also "live," just online. The format is such that we can see the professor, slides, and classmates simultaneously, facilitating discussion as if we were all in the same room, rather than spread out around the country.

[FloraDoraDolly]

No I haven't...

I have read several of the Maxwells' books. This family practices a form of isolationist Christianity that goes above and beyond the strictest evangelical denominations. For example, most children (or at least boys) in fundamentalist families are allowed to play sports, even if it only involves tossing around a football in the backyard with an older brother or with the kids from the homeschooling group. But the Maxwells aren't even allowed to do that because it creates a "appetite" for sports. Steve Maxwell hates sports. I recommend that you read some of their books, especially "Keeping Your Children's Hearts."

To answer an earlier question, I feel very sad for both Joseph and Elizabeth. They seem like good kids. I expect Elizabeth will bounce back faster than Joseph, since she moves in a world where there are friends and fun and opportunities to meet new people. But poor Joseph put all that work into fixing up the house, believing he would be able to live the life of a real adult with his pretty young wife. Now that dream has been shattered.

[icecreamycakeycake]

Why don't you just go to college?

I'm entering the Master's program in Education at a top 15 school, also online. However, I lose nothing; the curriculum is identical to "live" courses, taught by the same faculty, also "live," just online. The format is such that we can see the professor, slides, and classmates simultaneously, facilitating discussion as if we were all in the same room, rather than spread out around the country.

[NurseNell]

The lifestyle has not been forced on them, they made the decision to have a courtship, not their parents...this is not an arranged marriage

I do not know enough about Elizabeth's family but there is no way Joseph would be allowed to date and propose to a woman of his own choosing. None of the Maxwell adult children are allowed to go out and meet people on their own.

[TMS]

So the link doesn't work to read Nathan & Melanie's courtship now? While they still practiced "courtship" and didn't kiss until the wedding day, their courtship & engagement sounds like it went so much better than Joseph's. Maybe Steve just got a little cocky this time and that's why he rushed them into it. Anyway, I had saved the post in an email to myself:

Nathan & Melanie Maxwell's Courtship & Engagement Story

Nathan Maxwell and Melanie were engaged August 2nd, 2001 and married January 26th, 2002. A complete wedding report is available.

When Nathan began praying about buying the house across the street from us last fall, the Lord started impressing on his heart that it was time to marry. This was not exactly what Nathan thought was going to be a result of his praying about a house purchase!

Nathan knew if the Lord was telling him “Now†for marriage, He would also tell him “Who.†He began praying, and told Steve and I what was on his heart so we could pray as well. The Lord put the same young woman on all of our hearts—Melanie.

p>Nathan asked Melanie's dad out for lunch right after New Year's of this year, and there requested permission to court Melanie. After talking it over as a family, they felt a “getting to know you†phase, where we spent time together as families, would be good before committing to courtship since the families knew each other from church but not very well.

After a six-week phase of “getting to know you,†Melanie and her dad were ready to move the relationship to courtship. Then with five months of courting, it was time again for the relationship to take the next step.

I thought Nathan did a wonderful job of making Melanie's engagement night memorable and romantic. He hired a beautiful, white, stretch limousine to drive him out to Melanie's house to get her. Melanie thought she was coming over to our house for dinner.

Melanie couldn't believe it when she saw the limo drive up. She screamed and dashed off to finish getting ready. Nathan gave Melanie a rose and walked her out to the car.

Nathan and Melanie rode in the limo to Nathan's house where he had romantically decorated a small table with a pretty tablecloth, candles, roses, and Precious Moments figurines, with the engagement ring and a key to his house in the middle under a lace cloth.

After she said, “yes,†they got back in the car to enjoy the rest of their limo time. Then the driver dropped them at an elegant restaurant in a historic home in town where they ate dinner.

We had invited Melanie's family over for dessert so Nathan and Melanie could tell everyone the story together. Melanie's family arrived about 15 minutes before Nathan and Melanie did. With our family of ten and her family of twelve plus one son-in-law, we are an engagement party in ourselves! What a “hoopla†went up from their families when they walked in the house!

After being hugged and congratulated by each family member and showing them the ring, Nathan and Melanie shared about their evening. Nathan showed Melanie's family his house since they had never been through it before. Melanie had just seen it the Saturday before for the first time.

For dessert we enjoyed Baskins Robbins' ice-cream cakes decorated with “Congratulations Nathan and Melanie, Proverbs 18:22†which says, “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.â€

Finally we ended the evening with each family member, who wanted to, praying for Nathan and Melanie. It was a beautiful, fitting way to end a memorable evening since, “Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain†(Psalm 127:1).

Can you tell we are pretty excited? Wedding plans are being considered for January 2002, but they could be as late as May.

We praise God for His bountiful goodness. Neither Melanie nor Nathan have ever dated. They have kept themselves emotionally and physically pure in anticipation of the one person the Lord would have for them to spend their lives with. Melanie is a delightful, godly woman who is everything we could have ever hoped for as a spouse for our son.

[treemom]

Doesn't anyone on here feel sorry for two young people with broken hearts?

I actually do. But I also think much of our commentary is spot on. Because this BS life ruining courtship model is supposed to prevent broken hearts. That is THEIR claim, not ours. And in fact that treat the rest of us who dated as people who aren't whole, not like them. Except of course this demonstrates it does prevent you from giving away pieces of your heart to someone you don't marry. Because if they hadn't given it away, their hearts wouldn't be broken.

a healthy view of relationships is to say, you are going to love people and be heartbroken. But you can maintain even a conservative biblical view of sexual purity and still be a whole, unbroken person dating.

[marmalade]

Someone asked why a PhD candidate and I aren't going to a brick and mortar school. Other posts got in-between, but here's my reply (now sounding totally off the rails):

The specific program I want isn't offered in my area. The courses are live; I have to show up at my computer as if I had to show up for class. The only difference between this and their on-campus program is the use of a computer for lectures and class interaction. The work is the same and field work can be done in the area where I live and plan to teach.

Why should a married woman in her 40's spend the money for a second place when she's going to come back home to work when the option is there not to leave the house and get the same high-quality education online? This is the future of education; some experts predict that about half of high school curriculum will be delivered in the same manner (1/2 day at school, half at home) in the next 5-10 years. My program focuses on the technologies that will be required for the delivery of material live, via the interwebz.

I assure you, this is NOT College Minus or Clown...err...Crown College of Erin Bates fame. If I said the name of the school, I bet that most of our international posters would have heard of it.

[Justme]

So the link doesn't work to read Nathan & Melanie's courtship now? While they still practiced "courtship" and didn't kiss until the wedding day, their courtship & engagement sounds like it went so much better than Joseph's. Maybe Steve just got a little cocky this time and that's why he rushed them into it. Anyway, I had saved the post in an email to myself:

Look how much time they took to "get to know you". First 6 weeks as families, then 5 months as courting. Plus, they lived in the same town so they could actually see each other.

[TMS]

Look how much time they took to "get to know you". First 6 weeks as families, then 5 months as courting. Plus, they lived in the same town so they could actually see each other.

Maybe Steve figured that since they are now fundie celebrities, the Muncks already knew about their awesomeness, thus no need for a "getting to know you" phase.

[Justme]

Rebecca !!!!!11!!!! posted on Liz's blog. :shock:

[Guest Anonymous]

Rebecca !!!!!11!!!! posted on Liz's blog. :shock:

Good catch! And since the Maxwells never gave details, I guess Rebecca found Liz via FJ...

[TMS]

Good catch! And since the Maxwells never gave details, I guess Rebecca found Liz via FJ...

Now that's interesting....

[YPestis]

The specific program I want isn't offered in my area. The courses are live; I have to show up at my computer as if I had to show up for class. The only difference between this and their on-campus program is the use of a computer for lectures and class interaction. The work is the same and field work can be done in the area where I live and plan to teach.

Why should a married woman in her 40's spend the money for a second place when she's going to come back home to work when the option is there not to leave the house and get the same high-quality education online? This is the future of education; some experts predict that about half of high school curriculum will be delivered in the same manner (1/2 day at school, half at home) in the next 5-10 years. My program focuses on the technologies that will be required for the delivery of material live, via the interwebz.

I assure you, this is NOT College Minus or Clown...err...Crown College of Erin Bates fame. If I said the name of the school, I bet that most of our international posters would have heard of it.

I also think the next step in education will be the move online. However, I'm not sure that would work at the high school level since studying for hours at home requires a level of self-discipline many teens lack. So many 15 year olds would probably sleep through the lectures or skip out all together.

College students will often skip classes as well but they are treated as adults and suffer adult consequences such as academic probation and expulsion for poor performance. High schools are rarely allowed such leeway for their students since they are legally bound to teach the students. Also, so much of high school is about participation that technology would have to be fitted so that students can interact with other students online. The situation may end up where schools will have the technology to monitor and teach online pupils, but houses may not have resources to outfit the proper technology on their end. Anyway, I do believe the future of tertiary education is online. In some ways, the trend of modern homeschooling has pioneered the concept of educating at home.

[Coconut Flan]

Continuing the wander off topic, we have two private schools in the county that offer a split online - physical class schedule. It's either 3/3 or 4/2. It's a good blend for the students who get easily distracted in class and the parents who would like to homeschool but for various reasons can't.

[OkToBeTakei]

I actually do. But I also think much of our commentary is spot on. Because this BS life ruining courtship model is supposed to prevent broken hearts. That is THEIR claim, not ours. And in fact that treat the rest of us who dated as people who aren't whole, not like them. Except of course this demonstrates it does prevent you from giving away pieces of your heart to someone you don't marry. Because if they hadn't given it away, their hearts wouldn't be broken.

a healthy view of relationships is to say, you are going to love people and be heartbroken. But you can maintain even a conservative biblical view of sexual purity and still be a whole, unbroken person dating.

I really like this. Reality..you know.

[OkToBeTakei]

I grew up in a Christian home, and I've been told that there are lots of evil things that happen in the world, but I would never say that my parent's lifestyle was forced on me. I have made my own decisions

Sorry love..by that statement alone you fail. You make your own mind up..you do not need to be 'told' anything.

Good parenting is allowing and trusting your children to make those decisions because they are secure in the grounding they have given their children. Trusting them to do that. Being there to help if they falter or require the help.

Being 'told' is an insecurity. Being 'told' is an insecurity on the parents part who feel they obviously have not done a good enough job to trust their own child. Blaming the WORLD for being an insurmountable obstacle that your child cannot overcome without your absolute guidance is an insecurity.

Living a lifestyle to prevent this is called CONTROL. Having no respect for your children as intelligent individuals with choice is reprehensible.

The very reason I post here is this.

A very wise man once told me the very worst one thing in life you can do to a vulnerable individual is to impose YOUR will upon them. He also said the hardest thing is to watch said vulnerable people make the wrong choice. But that love is being there. He is my Dad. It is called trust. It is called respect.

Blah blah.

[debrand]

Nope...not a chance....I just don't like people criticizing a family who is trying to do what is right....what they believe the Bible teaches

Throughout history there have been examples of people doing horrible things when they honestly believed they were following the Bible. The judges in the Salem Witch Trials thought they were following the Bibles teachings when they sentenced innocent people to death. Many of the knights who fought in the crusades really believed they were fighting for God.

[moreorlessnu]

:clap: :clap:

Can you find a way to weave in, "That's right; please to meet you. I still haven't told you my name. Don't you believe in a mystery. Don't you want to want to know my name"?

[treemom]

I'm not a Maxwell...and I highly doubt they would feel brainwashed, or think that the lifestyle is being forced on them

Just because they don't feel like they are brainwashed or so sheltered from the world they have no other options doesn't mean it isn't true.

[OkToBeTakei]

Just because they don't feel like they are brainwashed or so sheltered from the world they have no other options doesn't mean it isn't true.

Cos the bible told them so..ooo.

Had to..sorry. :)

[treemom]

Someone asked why a PhD candidate and I aren't going to a brick and mortar school. Other posts got in-between, but here's my reply (now sounding totally off the rails):

The specific program I want isn't offered in my area. The courses are live; I have to show up at my computer as if I had to show up for class. The only difference between this and their on-campus program is the use of a computer for lectures and class interaction. The work is the same and field work can be done in the area where I live and plan to teach.

Why should a married woman in her 40's spend the money for a second place when she's going to come back home to work when the option is there not to leave the house and get the same high-quality education online? This is the future of education; some experts predict that about half of high school curriculum will be delivered in the same manner (1/2 day at school, half at home) in the next 5-10 years. My program focuses on the technologies that will be required for the delivery of material live, via the interwebz.

I assure you, this is NOT College Minus or Clown...err...Crown College of Erin Bates fame. If I said the name of the school, I bet that most of our international posters would have heard of it.

I am another person going online. I am getting a masters after a getting a bachelors and masters at a brick and mortar state u. The school I am attending is not one of the for profits. Has a brick and mortar school over a century and a half old. All the online profs have to have taught the class in person at least once and this u has done distance earning with the military since wwii.

It would be impossible for me to attend a traditional paced, brick and mortar schOol and be as successful. I work normal hOurs but in a job where things come up and I must stay late. I have a 12 year old and a busy life. And what I have found is this is much more difficult for me because I apparently learn well from the traditional lecture style.

Definitely not college minus :)

[VodouDoll]

I thought Rebecca K's post on the Munck blog was sweet. She's a nice girl. I do wonder how she found them. If you google "Joseph Maxwell Elizabeth" their Wedding Channel site comes up halfway down the page. If she didn't get the Muncks' name here, I wonder if she got it that way.

[jesssnerch]

Can you find a way to weave in, "That's right; please to meet you. I still haven't told you my name. Don't you believe in a mystery. Don't you want to want to know my name"?

That one was hard! I tried, though:

Nestygrl on August 16, 2012 at 10:34 pm said:

Your comment is awaiting moderation.

I’ve just been introduced to your blog!

I can’t believe it, right†But I’m pleased to meet you all. I’d like to remain anonymous on the internet, so I won’t tell you my name. But mystery is fun, isn’t it? But I’ll keep reading and maybe you all will want me to reveal myself!

Praise HIS glory!

[marmalade]

Can you find a way to weave in, "That's right; please to meet you. I still haven't told you my name. Don't you believe in a mystery. Don't you want to want to know my name"?

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: