I love my LARGE FAMILY - "Yes, they're all mine!"

[NurseNell]

I found a solution for mothers of toddlers. I don't know if it's better or worse than blanket training, but it has almost a 'Brave New World' air about it.

Ok so I'm not a pediatric physical therapist (wtf does that have to do with her position?), but I do find this more than odd and perhaps not very safe.

The physical and occupational therapists I know would never say put the kid in the container. The idea is to use a dishpan, which is a little shallower, and the kid sits at a table. There can be sand, rice, pebbles, marbles, shaving cream, etc. Or sand or rice with items hidden in them. It is never unsupervised since you don't want kids swallowing any of the items. There are even water tables that are usually outside and the kids play with boats, ducks, etc in them as they stand around the table. So does she stay inthe room or leave them unattended?

[longskirtlotsakids]

I also like how the cheated on mother claims the mistress is a sleez because she lives in a 'slum'..um, sugar, if you have no skills and two young kids, you arent far from low income yourself.....

[DarkAnts]

I know a women who has had two divorces. She is proud of the 12 children she has. She is also happy to be a single mom. She has told more then a few women in town that marriage is not what people make it out to be. Her children are involved in the community band and theater. She is also involved. She works at the local coffee shop and is involved in community music.

Someday, I would like to hear her story.

[August]

One of my FB friends, who is an AP mom and totally non-fundie, uses sensory bins for her daughter. She'll fill them with sand of different textures, random pebbles or shells, tinsel or packing materials, etc. but-key point here-she doesn't put the child INSIDE the box. The box is just to hold the sensory items. I mean, it's probably not that big of a deal, but you'd have to get a pretty large box for a 4yo to fit in it, with toys, and feel comfortable sitting in for nearly an hour :? I'm also not sure that it would work as a passive restraint for a determined child unless there's some Pearl-esque training going along with it. Surely the child could climb out of the box or tip it over and get out if they wanted to?

I do/did this with my kids. With my oldest, I had a kiddy pool and I'd put her and the box of rice in there, then clean up was easy. Same fir standing her at the sink with water or shaving cream. But my second ... well, shall we just mention how rice gets into every corner of the house when it's tracked there by walking people? If the sides of the kiddy pool had been higher he would have had more of that game, but I retired the idea pretty shortly after I started trying it with him. I think the kidswould easily be absorbed for that long, and just climb out when they're done, with minimal cleanup afterwards.

I think its a pretty genius idea.

[Wolfie]

I do/did this with my kids. With my oldest, I had a kiddy pool and I'd put her and the box of rice in there, then clean up was easy. Same fir standing her at the sink with water or shaving cream. But my second ... well, shall we just mention how rice gets into every corner of the house when it's tracked there by walking people? If the sides of the kiddy pool had been higher he would have had more of that game, but I retired the idea pretty shortly after I started trying it with him. I think the kidswould easily be absorbed for that long, and just climb out when they're done, with minimal cleanup afterwards.

I think its a pretty genius idea.

Outside. Do anything messy outside or in the bathtub. This was my mom's trick, but luckily we lived in a climate where that was possible. (it did end up involving some emergency trips, like the time my sister sat in a car seat that had just been removed from the car and when she leaned back it went down over the edge of the porch it was on.)

[emmiedahl]

Sensory experiences can be really fun for kids and interest them for long periods of time. But how does she keep the children in the bucket? Probably a threat of consequences. And that threat takes all the fun and education out of the sensory play.

I used to have one of those water tables and I sadly got rid of it right before finding out I was pregnant with #5. But on a warm day, I put him outside on the back porch with a bowl of water and some measuring cups (with me right there, of course). I can pay bills or work on the laptop while he plays. When I deep-clean the kitchen, I put a pie tin of various things on the floor or a low table for a toddler to play in, so I can clean while he plays and then clean up the mess before mopping the floor. Whipped cream is a fun sensory food that they can eat safely, along with jello and a few other things.

I have a problem with confinement in small spaces because I know how claustrophobic it makes me feel. The lady might be better served using a playpen for younger children and sending older ones to do a craft project at a desk.

[Sarietty]

I don't know why plastic storage bins would be preferable to something like this. Clearly, the Large Family moms have never seen Rugrats.

[ilovetchotchkes]

There's a blog that I follow on parenting that stresses sensory experiences, and fun things to do with kids.

the way she does it, (I think she only has 2-3 kids) its a REALLY shallow bin, like the kind you'd get for under the bed for shoes. She'll let the kid "sit" in it if its like beans or rice to make it more "sensory" or the kid just getting so into playing (like they do) climbs in to be closer to the "stuff" BUT and this is a HYOOGE "BUT" here, I am of the understanding that her kids are supervised while doing such activities as opposed to "here kid! i'm gonna dump you in a miniature ball pit in the hopes you'll leave me the fuck alone"

[Witsec7]

There's a blog that I follow on parenting that stresses sensory experiences, and fun things to do with kids.

the way she does it, (I think she only has 2-3 kids) its a REALLY shallow bin, like the kind you'd get for under the bed for shoes. She'll let the kid "sit" in it if its like beans or rice to make it more "sensory" or the kid just getting so into playing (like they do) climbs in to be closer to the "stuff" BUT and this is a HYOOGE "BUT" here, I am of the understanding that her kids are supervised while doing such activities as opposed to "here kid! i'm gonna dump you in a miniature ball pit in the hopes you'll leave me the fuck alone"

QFT

[tankgirl]

There's a blog that I follow on parenting that stresses sensory experiences, and fun things to do with kids.

the way she does it, (I think she only has 2-3 kids) its a REALLY shallow bin, like the kind you'd get for under the bed for shoes. She'll let the kid "sit" in it if its like beans or rice to make it more "sensory" or the kid just getting so into playing (like they do) climbs in to be closer to the "stuff" BUT and this is a HYOOGE "BUT" here, I am of the understanding that her kids are supervised while doing such activities as opposed to "here kid! i'm gonna dump you in a miniature ball pit in the hopes you'll leave me the fuck alone"

Off topic, but your ball pit comment totally made me think of The Simpsons episode were they send Maggie to the Ayn Rand daycare. They put all the babies in a ball pit, and when they climb to the top and start crying to get out, one of the workers says, to add more balls, even as another worker questions if the babies like the ball pit. Sorry, that just made me laugh and seemed like ideas for some of these people.

[snarkbillie]

There's a blog that I follow on parenting that stresses sensory experiences, and fun things to do with kids.

the way she does it, (I think she only has 2-3 kids) its a REALLY shallow bin, like the kind you'd get for under the bed for shoes. She'll let the kid "sit" in it if its like beans or rice to make it more "sensory" or the kid just getting so into playing (like they do) climbs in to be closer to the "stuff" BUT and this is a HYOOGE "BUT" here, I am of the understanding that her kids are supervised while doing such activities as opposed to "here kid! i'm gonna dump you in a miniature ball pit in the hopes you'll leave me the fuck alone"

I had a long shallow plastic tub full of sand for my kids when they were toddlers, but I didn't just dump them in it! They played with the sand, sometimes they got in, but mostly they sat beside it an played. My mom thought I was insane having an "indoor sand box" but I liked having it.

[Mama Mia]

I think the advantage to the individual bin as opposed to a larger play yard or gate or a bathtub would be that the pre-school age kids could play with items that might not be appropriate for a toddler who still puts everything in their mouth.

Also, I don't think there is anything wrong with little kids playing on their own without someone hovering over them every. single. second. Obviously you can't leave a bunch of small children in the house alone, but hopefully you can be within earshot and have a cup of coffee while they play in the next room at least occasionally.

It would really depend on the kids involved, I would hate to see this used as any kind of punishment - but a little bit of privacy and quiet play time alone can be very beneficial to everyone. I would think particularly for kids who have many siblings close in age.

[August]

Outside. Do anything messy outside or in the bathtub. This was my mom's trick, but luckily we lived in a climate where that was possible. (it did end up involving some emergency trips, like the time my sister sat in a car seat that had just been removed from the car and when she leaned back it went down over the edge of the porch it was on.)

We had no outside, and bathtubs are very dangerous places. There's all that slippery ceramic, and if you grab the wrong thing you get doused in water. I've put a kid in the shower with a can of shaving cream, but the bathtub always needs supervision. For me the point of these activities is that they don't need supervising. They're for when I want to dump them in the miniature ball pit in the hopes they'll leave me the fuck alone.

[ilovetchotchkes]

We had no outside, and bathtubs are very dangerous places. There's all that slippery ceramic, and if you grab the wrong thing you get doused in water. I've put a kid in the shower with a can of shaving cream, but the bathtub always needs supervision. For me the point of these activities is that they don't need supervising. They're for when I want to dump them in the miniature ball pit in the hopes they'll leave me the fuck alone.

I think you completely missed my point.

[longskirtlotsakids]

It's as if they are in some competition for desperation. Now they are discussing family size and spaces. This one is the best:

I have 8 children still at home, ages 10-18, and we are in the process of moving into our 26 foot rv. We have stayed in it for long trips of a month or two at a time but this time we hope to spend a year or two traveling the country. We have about 200-250 square feet of space. Lol. We have been living in a 2600 sf home with 2-3 beds in a bedroom but they all prefer to sleep in moms room anyway so we have a lot of extra wasted space."

First: WTF? Really? Into an RV with 8 pre and teen agers? The smell and lack of privacy would be a nightmare.

Second: Your kids, between the ages of 10 and 18 still prefer to sleep with you?

Third: I wonder whether they are losing their home or leaving a perfectly good home to wander ala Lauren. I wonder what the kids, who would normally have friends, think of this.

The living conditions posted by most of the followers remind me of the novel Angela's Ashes. It's all, kds everywhere! No room! We sleep with the baby and I'm pregnant again!

[chaotic life]

I've known women who allow their pre-teen and teens to sleep in the bed with them. I think it shows a strong co-dependency behavior and is highly inappropriate personally. If I haven't done my job to help my kids feel safe and sound sleeping in their own rooms by then, then I have utterly FAILED my children.

I had 8 kids in 2400sqft and I thought I was going INSANE. I put them in 4500sqft and life is SOOO much more peaceful. I would NEVER spend even a day in the size of an RV with that many kids. You'd have to be committed once someone peeled you out of the sardine can and defogged your brain from all of that teen body odor!

[Witsec7]

It's as if they are in some competition for desperation. Now they are discussing family size and spaces. This one is the best:

I have 8 children still at home, ages 10-18, and we are in the process of moving into our 26 foot rv. We have stayed in it for long trips of a month or two at a time but this time we hope to spend a year or two traveling the country. We have about 200-250 square feet of space. Lol. We have been living in a 2600 sf home with 2-3 beds in a bedroom but they all prefer to sleep in moms room anyway so we have a lot of extra wasted space."

First: WTF? Really? Into an RV with 8 pre and teen agers? The smell and lack of privacy would be a nightmare.

Second: Your kids, between the ages of 10 and 18 still prefer to sleep with you?

Third: I wonder whether they are losing their home or leaving a perfectly good home to wander ala Lauren. I wonder what the kids, who would normally have friends, think of this.

The living conditions posted by most of the followers remind me of the novel Angela's Ashes. It's all, kds everywhere! No room! We sleep with the baby and I'm pregnant again!

Last night I was reading a thread on that page discussing adopting out of foster care. Women were giving input as to family size restrictions in various states as well as bedroom requirements. More than one said that they would arrange rooms to fit the required standards for their state but once the adoption was final all bets were off and they would stack them like cordwood. :(

[Koala]

I've known women who allow their pre-teen and teens to sleep in the bed with them. I think it shows a strong co-dependency behavior and is highly inappropriate personally. If I haven't done my job to help my kids feel safe and sound sleeping in their own rooms by then, then I have utterly FAILED my children.

I had 8 kids in 2400sqft and I thought I was going INSANE. I put them in 4500sqft and life is SOOO much more peaceful. I would NEVER spend even a day in the size of an RV with that many kids. You'd have to be committed once someone peeled you out of the sardine can and defogged your brain from all of that teen body odor!

Really? Teens and pre-teens? Good lord.

We were co-sleepers when our kids were little, but there comes a point when you buy them pretty new bedding, hand them their stuffed animal, and send them on their way. Having teenagers sharing a bed with their parents seems wrong to me.

[QueenSyd]

On the topic of having kids sit in tubs for sensory activities (escpecially messy ones), I think it is a GREAT idea--as long as the tubs are a size where children can fit comfortably, they enjoy doing it, and it isn't used as a babysitter. I could see myself someday using this idea with the shallow under-bed containers. I am definitely usually one to react strongly to things pertaining to children, but I don't see this as developmentally inappropriate at all.

Co-sleeping that late is so squicky to me. How are you still making your other quivering arrows with near grown children sleeping in your bed? I actually slept with my parents til I was in 4th grade which lots of people think is way too long, but I had lots of childhood anxiety in general and my parents don't seem to regret it at all. However I had a friend in high school who still slept with his grandmother and that just seems incredibly strange.

[Witsec7]

On the topic of having kids sit in tubs for sensory activities (escpecially messy ones), I think it is a GREAT idea--as long as the tubs are a size where children can fit comfortably, they enjoy doing it, and it isn't used as a babysitter. I could see myself someday using this idea with the shallow under-bed containers. I am definitely usually one to react strongly to things pertaining to children, but I don't see this as developmentally inappropriate at all.

Co-sleeping that late is so squicky to me. How are you still making your other quivering arrows with near grown children sleeping in your bed? I actually slept with my parents til I was in 4th grade which lots of people think is way too long, but I had lots of childhood anxiety in general and my parents don't seem to regret it at all. However I had a friend in high school who still slept with his grandmother and that just seems incredibly strange.

In my original post on the subject, the mother was using the tubs as a baby sitter. I guess the sensory activities focus took my original point and left it somewhere down the rabbit hole.

[laura oz]

The physical and occupational therapists I know would never say put the kid in the container. The idea is to use a dishpan, which is a little shallower, and the kid sits at a table. There can be sand, rice, pebbles, marbles, shaving cream, etc. Or sand or rice with items hidden in them. It is never unsupervised since you don't want kids swallowing any of the items. There are even water tables that are usually outside and the kids play with boats, ducks, etc in them as they stand around the table. So does she stay inthe room or leave them unattended?

Just went to a meeting with my sons teacher, speech therapist, and occupational therapist this morning and they mentioned something like this to try with him. They advised me to watch him and help him engage with the stimulation. So while I may get some quiet in my house you can bet I'll be watching him. I'll save the me time for naps.

[Sprocket]

Kim Wills Breuer

I just saw this way of getting in touch... The Quiver Full of Snark forum has been monitoring this group and posting quotes.. viewtopic.php?f=8&t=12070

People need to be warned to be careful..... I know I am more than likely NOT going to be posting anything anymore..

This is why we can't have nice things.

[Sprocket]

The pictures of other peoples children concerns me. Warning Pedophiles. ..

Um... how do I say this? If you are reading this, as a rule FJ champions children. Abuse, pedophelia, etc are non-negotiable things that FJ stands against.

[Aisling]

This is why we can't have nice things.

Ooh, we are uneducated, pedophilic, maladjusted hags apparently.

ETA: I always find it strange when people post pictures of their kids really openly on the net, then complain when people look at them. there is a reason why i don't put pictures of my child up anywhere, because she is a kid.

[GeoBQn]

I'm amused whenever people try to profile us as all being the same type of person. In this case, we are women who desperately want large families, but can't due to a disagreeing husband or boyfriend, and we are thus jealous of those who can have lots of children.