Daniel & Candice Keller got a baby!

[marmalade]

Its called a 'private adoption' because it is not through an agency.. dumb ass!! The baby is biologically my nephew to answer your ?..

I was asking an honest question. I mixed up the terms "private" and "closed" adoptions (the latter of which I was a participant, as the baby). The name-calling was really not warranted. Thanks for the information, even if your response was not delivered in the same manner of the inquiry.

I wish you and yours well. Also, lighten up. We're on your side here, but you're not making any friends by being so antagonistic.

[candice-keller]

Hi Candice,

I think your son is beautiful and I am glad you have the experience of being a mother!

I think that your gratitude to your son's birthmother is genuine. What most people are objecting to, I think, is that your post seems to imply that because her choice to adopt worked out the best for your family, it's automatically the best for everyone.

For many women, having an abortion may indeed be the right choice. They may have medical issues or be financially or emotionally unable to go through with a pregnancy. Me, for instance--I'm not currently sexually active, but if I were to get unexpectantly pregnant now, I would probably have an abortion. The fact that I live in a rape-you-before-the-procedure state wouldn't make a difference.

Why? Because I have two children already. Having another child, which would strain already thin financial resources, prevent me from properly caring for them, and be unfair to my parents who are helping me financially, is simply NOT something I can do right now.

Anecdotally, if I were to compare the women I've known who have had adoptions and who have had abortions, it was the women who have had adoptions who have had more emotional issues--by an incredible ratio. The women who undergo abortions--aproximately 1/3 of American women, mind you--were by and large able to move on. (The one exception was a women I knew who had been raped by a prominate community member, and displaced her pain of not getting day in court onto having an abortion. ) The women who had given a child up for adoption were always unsettled, because they knew that, sugarcoating aside, somewhere out there was a living, breathing child that they had abandoned.

I think you do want to do the best for your child. Please recognize, though, that sometimes the best thing you can do for a (potential) child is to not give birth to them. Women who have abortions are not monsters or murderers, they simply recognize that they are not currently in a position where they can have a child and care for it, or go through with a pregnancy to full term.

Thank you for wishing us well! I understand that sometimes it is better for women to have abortions. I NEVER said that I didnt?! I never said that EVERYONE should place their child for adoption.. That is just dumb

[Witsec7]

Its called invasion of privacy. Obviously when I made the video I set it up to be public, so no.. I wouldnt be contacting her about the video. Your not the brightest crayon in the box are ya?

Be sure and let your atny know that you were dishing your BIL here. The internets never forget.

I'm gonna let Cowcatcher continue with her thoughtful explanations for why many of us choose abortion.

[Glass Cowcatcher]

I won't be around much longer, a friend is coming over and we're going to watch a movie. :( I hate to miss Fundy Friday but the movie night tradition has been going on much longer.

Nobody actually hates you here Candice, just broaden your horizons.

[xReems]

Candice, I do apologize if any of my comments sounded rude or disrespectful. I'm glad you came on here to set the record straight. Like I said, I'm so happy that you two were able to adopt and it's good to see that he is being loved by you and your husband. I wish you two nothing but the best!

If you don't mind me asking, when did you and your in laws stop talking? Obviously they must have approved of Daniel's "courtship" with you so when did things got terrible? Are you and the in laws still not talking or has the relationship gotten better?

[candice-keller]

I was asking an honest question. I mixed up the terms "private" and "closed" adoptions (the latter of which I was a participant, as the baby). The name-calling was really not warranted. Thanks for the information, even if your response was not delivered in the same manner of the inquiry.

I wish you and yours well. Also, lighten up. We're on your side here, but you're not making any friends by being so antagonistic.

I am sorry for calling you a dumb ass, however I took the "how ironic" as being a smart ass comment. If you ment no slander, I am sorry and apologize! If you were in my shoes.. you wouldnt be telling me to lighten up.. i HATE to be lied about.. Some of these people on here talking shit about Brighton are not on "my side". I didnt join this thing to make friends, I just wanted people to know the truth is they were going to talk. Thank you though. So you were adopted?

[Glass Cowcatcher]

You'll have to forgive me for being judgmental, because so many people do not realize that there are cases where abortion is best, and that seemed to be what your post was implying to me.

Like I said no one hates you here. We can be a crunchy bunch, even a rude bunch (though personally I think a lot of that is out of line), but most of the "snark" is motivated by legitimate concern.

[candice-keller]

Candice, I do apologize if any of my comments sounded rude or disrespectful. I'm glad you came on here to set the record straight. Like I said, I'm so happy that you two were able to adopt and it's good to see that he is being loved by you and your husband. I wish you two nothing but the best!

If you don't mind me asking, when did you and your in laws stop talking? Obviously they must have approved of Daniel's "courtship" with you so when did things got terrible? Are you and the in laws still not talking or has the relationship gotten better?

They didnt really like me from the start because I wasnt raised in that cult they r in. They tried to make Daniel end it w me, but obviously that didnt work ;) Um.. They really started not talking to us when we left "the ministry". Daniel got a secular job instead of following in his dads shoes and being a prison missionary. Then the more they found out about us not living like they do, they just quit talking to us.. They still havent given us a reason as to why they want nothing to do with us. Daniel wants to go down there one day and try to get it out of his dad.. so.. No things have NOT gotten better. At all.. but its not our fault. We accept them as they are, all weird and crazy, but they cannot accept us. lol

[candice-keller]

You'll have to forgive me for being judgmental, because so many people do not realize that there are cases where abortion is best, and that seemed to be what your post was implying to me.

Like I said no one hates you here. We can be a crunchy bunch, even a rude bunch (though personally I think a lot of that is out of line), but most of the "snark" is motivated by legitimate concern.

Thank you! I appreciate that. Have a good night!

[candice-keller]

Be sure and let your atny know that you were dishing your BIL here. The internets never forget.

I'm gonna let Cowcatcher continue with her thoughtful explanations for why many of us choose abortion.

I sure will :) Thanks

[Glass Cowcatcher]

Movie sign! Movie sign!

Back later.

[marmalade]

I am sorry for calling you a dumb ass, however I took the "how ironic" as being a smart ass comment. If you ment no slander, I am sorry and apologize! If you were in my shoes.. you wouldnt be telling me to lighten up.. i HATE to be lied about.. Some of these people on here talking shit about Brighton are not on "my side". I didnt join this thing to make friends, I just wanted people to know the truth is they were going to talk. Thank you though. So you were adopted?

The irony of D&C was based in the fact that one wasn't done. No harm, no foul.

Yes, I was adopted, but a long time ago in a much different adoption climate than we have today; women had no choice but to have their babies and if unwed, taken off to the infamous "unwed girls' homes, even if they were in their 20's, as my birth mother was. My adoptive "mother" would never have been approved as a suitable parent today; she was an alcoholic and drank herself to death by the time I was 10. My dad, thankfully, re-married and his second wife adopted my brother and me. While not perfect, she was at least "there" for us most of the time (except during when she went thru menopause...that's another story. :shock: ).

[pomology]

They didnt really like me from the start because I wasnt raised in that cult they r in. They tried to make Daniel end it w me, but obviously that didnt work ;) Um.. They really started not talking to us when we left "the ministry". Daniel got a secular job instead of following in his dads shoes and being a prison missionary. Then the more they found out about us not living like they do, they just quit talking to us.. They still havent given us a reason as to why they want nothing to do with us. Daniel wants to go down there one day and try to get it out of his dad.. so.. No things have NOT gotten better. At all.. but its not our fault. We accept them as they are, all weird and crazy, but they cannot accept us. lol

If you don't mind me asking, how did you meet Daniel if you weren't involved in ATI?

[aubrietta]

ehh.. I can handle Josh now. They got married the week before we did, so at first when I met him.. He was a total douch. He is different now. At least around us.. It may just be that he knows we dont live like they do so when he is around us he is different.. i dont really know.. all i know is that i couldnt stand him when we first met, and the last few times we have been around him he is not so bad.

I'm just quoting this because no one else has and it's juicy and just in case she decides to go deleting all her posts or something.

[candice-keller]

The irony of D&C was based in the fact that one wasn't done. No harm, no foul.

Yes, I was adopted, but a long time ago in a much different adoption climate than we have today; women had no choice but to have their babies and if unwed, taken off to the infamous "unwed girls' homes, even if they were in their 20's, as my birth mother was. My adoptive "mother" would never have been approved as a suitable parent today; she was an alcoholic and drank herself to death by the time I was 10. My dad, thankfully, re-married and his second wife adopted my brother and me. While not perfect, she was at least "there" for us most of the time (except during when she went thru menopause...that's another story. :shock: ).

Oh wow!! That is why "adotion" has such a horrible image! Women were forced to give their children away. It is so sad. Now a days open adoptions are getting more and more common. We plan on having an open adoption with Brighton and his birthmom. I feel it is healthy for everyone involved. A friend of mine posted a video on adoption on youtube, you should look it up. Its called "The Agape Project". She focuses on how much love there is in adoption. I think its healthy when adoptive parents and birth parents have a mutual respect for one another. I am glad things worked out for you! Yikes.. Menopause :o haha aweful thing

[candice-keller]

I'm just quoting this because no one else has and it's juicy and just in case she decides to go deleting all her posts or something.

Lmao.. I wont deny it.. hahaaa

[OkToBeTakei]

OMG one minute Experienced is making bbq and then..poof :lol:

Very, very cute wee baby. Glad to hear he is doing well and you are enjoying him so much. It only gets better Candice..enjoy.

I think anything related to extreme religion and people who publicise it will be snarkworthy. Unfortunately for you the degrees of separation are too close I guess :(

[Witsec7]

OMG one minute Experienced is making bbq and then..poof :lol:

Very, very cute wee baby. Glad to hear he is doing well and you are enjoying him so much. It only gets better Candice..enjoy.

I think anything related to extreme religion and people who publicise it will be snarkworthy. Unfortunately for you the degrees of separation are too close I guess :(

I'm going to have to rethink this BBQ stuff. But the buffalo burger was divine. :D

[candice-keller]

If you don't mind me asking, how did you meet Daniel if you weren't involved in ATI?

Long story short, I went to a home for troubled teens to get off drugs and get my life straight. I graduated there and started working there. Daniels family came up to see the home and thats when we met. Got married a year and a week to the day later :)

[candice-keller]

OMG one minute Experienced is making bbq and then..poof :lol:

Very, very cute wee baby. Glad to hear he is doing well and you are enjoying him so much. It only gets better Candice..enjoy.

I think anything related to extreme religion and people who publicise it will be snarkworthy. Unfortunately for you the degrees of separation are too close I guess :(

Thank you soo much for the encouragement!! We are enjoying him soo much!! Everyday I love him more I feel like! Thanks again!

[Sprocket]

Thanks for answering! To be honest, I would kick myself if I didn't ask about what you thought about your newest BiL, David Waller? The opinions about him here vary, based on what we've seen on tv and through his blog about their life their blog. It seems he is a little stiff (seriously, no pun intended) and uncomfortable in his own skin. Based on what you know about Priscilla, do you think she'll be happy with this lifestyle and his ministry?

P.S. I've don't have girls so I can't speak of them... but little boys are amazing. Congratulations.

edited because I forgot a word.

[candice-keller]

Thanks for answering! To be honest, I would kick myself if I didn't ask about what you thought about your newest BiL, David Waller? The opinions about him here, based on what we've seen on tv and through his blog about their life their blog. It seems he is a little stiff (seriously, no pun intended) and uncomfortable in his own skin. Based on what you know about Priscilla, do you think she'll be happy with this lifestyle and his ministry?

P.S. I've don't have girls so I can't speak of them... but little boys are amazing. Congratulations.

haha.. All I can say is that I think they are PERFECT for eachother!! Honestly, the only time I met him was at the wedding and from what I saw they act alllloottt alike so I guess they will be happy. He does seem pretty stiff. Daniel is a big jokester so he was on the phone w him once and made a joke and they didnt laugh.. Thanks for the congrats!

[Witsec7]

Have the mods verified this poster? I know we're not reddit, but Obama is sitting in this empty chair in my living room and he wanted me to ask.

[holierthanyou]

And what? Tell him FJ forced you post a video of your child for the world to see?

This is why you are great, experiencedd. I laugh anytime some person on the internetz starts trying to muster up some big threats about calling their lawyer (I am guessing 99% don't have their own lawyer on standby anyway). I don't know if she's fundy or not (and at this point I don't really care), but what I do now know is that she's rude, immature, and likes attention. Also seems to mix up 'your' and 'you're' when she tries to insult you. I understand that she might not be the fundy famewhoring on television, but she came here and starts posting up a storm in this thread, with a whole tonne of posts just right after another by her. If I really wanted people on a blog or discussion board to STOP talking about me, the last thing I would do is go poking around the hornet's and start throwing a temper tantrum.

[OkToBeTakei]

Have the mods verified this poster? I know we're not reddit, but Obama is sitting in this empty chair in my living room and he wanted me to ask.

Tell him I think he is an exceptionally HAWT politician.

Touch his leg for me. :lol: