Esther Shrader (Anna Duggar's sister) living in a pop up

[Mama Mia]

Not true. Legitimate hospitals and birthing centers do Apgar scores at one and five minutes after birth.

Besides, the baby in the photo has been cleaned up. Usually they are weighed and measured (which doesn't take long anyway) at the same time they are cleaned up, then they are returned to the mom. They don't wait 2 hours to do all this.

If you actually read what I wrote I said that they did the Apgar scores, they just do them unobtrusively. I know at my grandchild's birth, which was at a hospital, they didn't do the measuring and weighing and anything non-essential until after the bonding time. They have some sort of 'family friendly' certification and were VERY adamant about the first 2 hours being just the bonding time. Obviously they looked the baby over first to make sure everything was okay, cut the cord and wiped the baby down- but then he went right to mom's chest and they came back later to do all the rest.

ETA: they also had some pretty obnoxious policies - like freaking out if mom gives baby a pacifier - the nurse was EXTREMELY rude about it, to the point my daughter made a complaint. The policy is to promote breast feeding - but my daughter had already successfully breastfed her older child and this baby was latching and feeding just fine and was even up to above his birth weight at his 5 day check.

[SquirrelySquirrel]

ETA: they also had some pretty obnoxious policies - like freaking out if mom gives baby a pacifier - the nurse was EXTREMELY rude about it, to the point my daughter made a complaint. The policy is to promote breast feeding - but my daughter had already successfully breastfed her older child and this baby was latching and feeding just fine and was even up to above his birth weight at his 5 day check.

I think in the push to get moms to breastfeed and to make everything more natural and family-friendly, many are taking it too far. I was thisclose to slapping some of the nurses when I had my daughter, and I've never hit anyone in my life. I was so annoyed and stressed out from their constant interference and pushiness that I badgered my OB into releasing me after 48 hours, when it is (was?) standard to keep moms 72 hours after a c-section. I think he knew I was going to walk out anyway at that point. And I was 100% committed to all of the things they were pushing! It was ridiculous.

[Coconut Flan]

Yes, some hospitals do follow that two hours before removing the baby from mom's side or chest thing. We had a relative give birth last year and that's what was followed there. The birthing rooms there are quite separate and behind a double set of locked doors to prevent any unwanted intrusions. Mom, dad, and baby are not to be disturbed during that two hour period after birth except for essential medical procedures. The baby is taken to the nursery for weight, height, bath, etc. while mom is being moved to her post partum room. It's easy enough to do the Apgar evaluation while mom holds the baby.

[Dutch_girl]

If you actually read what I wrote I said that they did the Apgar scores, they just do them unobtrusively. I know at my grandchild's birth, which was at a hospital, they didn't do the measuring and weighing and anything non-essential until after the bonding time. They have some sort of 'family friendly' certification and were VERY adamant about the first 2 hours being just the bonding time. Obviously they looked the baby over first to make sure everything was okay, cut the cord and wiped the baby down- but then he went right to mom's chest and they came back later to do all the rest.

ETA: they also had some pretty obnoxious policies - like freaking out if mom gives baby a pacifier - the nurse was EXTREMELY rude about it, to the point my daughter made a complaint. The policy is to promote breast feeding - but my daughter had already successfully breastfed her older child and this baby was latching and feeding just fine and was even up to above his birth weight at his 5 day check.

Is it normal in the US to take the baby away right after it's born to clean it up and cut the cord? Or do they give the baby to mom so it can lay on her chest?

I've learned to determine the APGARscore when a newborn is in rest, because that's more reliable than when a baby is really irritated, because then the activity (second A) and the Grimace are higher. That's why we always put a baby on mom's chest, then we clean it up (and when it's necessary I take it to the resussitation table..) So most kids don't leave mom's chest for the first hour of two

[NjoyingNsanity]

Awe she's a little cutie! Glad everything turned out okay for them.

[Ellimenopy]

Is it normal in the US to take the baby away right after it's born to clean it up and cut the cord? Or do they give the baby to mom so it can lay on her chest?

I've learned to determine the APGARscore when a newborn is in rest, because that's more reliable than when a baby is really irritated, because then the activity (second A) and the Grimace are higher. That's why we always put a baby on mom's chest, then we clean it up (and when it's necessary I take it to the resussitation table..) So most kids don't leave mom's chest for the first hour of two

My baby was taken away for four hours after a scheduled C-section, even though everything was completely normal and I was begging to see him while in recovery and then again in my room. I have never been able to get a straight answer as to why this was done except that it was "policy" for a c-section. I berated our OB, who was extremely sympathetic (he left right after surgery to go back to his office, because, well, everything was normal), but I can't get that time back.

But yeah, we will be traveling the hour and a half next time to not have anything to do with that hospital again. And yeah, I definitely recommend a "birth plan," even if you think they're stupid, because your nurses may ignore everything you say in the moment over " policy." I'm sorry; still quite a bit bitter about it.

But all to say: yes, things are changing in big hospitals, but medium to small hospitals will have a potluck of '50s to modern-style policies.

[Lillybee]

I have never been separated from my babies even thought the oldest was born in the 70's. But then I was very fussy about the hospital policies about birth.

[FeministShrew]

My hospital usually lets mom & baby bond with baby on mom's chest while they do their tests & such, but both of my kids were born under stress. My daughter was face-up & had to be pulled out with forceps. The doctor literally threw her on my chest & snapped "Don't touch her!", then the nurse whisked her out of the room. They brought her back in a warmer, but I couldn't hold her for 8 hours because they were worried about her blood sugar. (Never really made sense to me.)I was evidently torn pretty badly & my blood pressure shot up during the birth, & evidently the doctor was worried about both of us. He had drapes put around me during the actual birth, too.

With my son, he went into stress & the nurse yelled that they had to get the baby out NOW. Very comforting.

The cord was wrapped around his neck & he was blue. I didn't get to hold him for 12 hours because of that. He was kept in the nursery during that time.

I hear other women's birth stories & it makes me sort of sad. I'm glad my kids were safe & received immediate care, but I would have liked the warm, fuzzy bonding memories instead of the fear, worry & frustration I do remember.

[Violet]

If it makes you feel better Feminist Shrew, my mum couldn't hold me until I was 10 days old because I born so prematurely. Very glad your babies were safe, but yeah I understand, I can't imagine what it must be like to have just given birth and have your child wisked off before you even get to say hello.

[bsue]

Weirdly, I can't remember exactly when I got to hold my son. I think that they took him and gave him a quick wipe down, diapered him and did measurements while I was getting a few stitches? I'm guessing I didn't get him right away because in photos he's only a little messy and has a hat on. Then I'm pretty sure he was on my chest for a couple of hours until we moved from a delivery room to a postpartum room. At that point, they took him for an hour or so to do other (??) things, but my husband went with him. You'd think you'd remember every second, but I was in such an exhausted daze right afterwards that I'm not exactly sure on the timing.

My daughter was born unexpectedly 8 weeks early (meaning I wasn't on bed rest, hadn't had any complications, just went into labor hard and fast at 32 weeks). I remember that more - partly because it was just a year ago and partly, I think, because I didn't have an epidural. Anyway, they did have to work on her for ten minutes or so after birth, helping her breath, getting her warm, etc. But, they did give her to me to put on my chest briefly. I remember someone saying, "mom and dad get 1 minute." And they meant it - it was timed. But, I so appreciate that they gave us that one minute. It was a precious bit of normality in what had been a very scary morning, and we didn't get to hold her again for about 24 hours. She's perfectly fine now, by the way. First birthday next month!

I've always appreciated the balance our hospital and doctor had between medical intervention and being supportive of a "warmer" birth experience. It's the hospital nearest us, so we got lucky, I think.

[Buzzard]

WALLA!!!!!!!!!!!

First off, I fucking cannot believe he wrote "walla." I really thought that was just a Kristina thing.

Second - no fucking way did he make her lunch all purdy like that. Esther must be off bedrest and back to her wifely duties of submitting to Monsieur Dumbass. This is seriously ridiculous.

I call eleventy bullshit on him sauteeing anything while on a juice fast and making it look pretty before he gives it to anyone.

[EmmieJ]

My son was born almost 15 years ago, at a Kaiser hospital in California. He never left my sight from birth to when we checked out a day later. So at least at that place, and at that time, the Kaiser OB facilities were geared toward keeping mom and infant together unless the baby needed to be in NICU.

[SquirrelySquirrel]

My baby was taken away for four hours after a scheduled C-section, even though everything was completely normal and I was begging to see him while in recovery and then again in my room. I have never been able to get a straight answer as to why this was done except that it was "policy" for a c-section. I berated our OB, who was extremely sympathetic (he left right after surgery to go back to his office, because, well, everything was normal), but I can't get that time back.

:( Same here, though it was closer to 2 hours, and I was freaking the freak out and demanding my baby. And when I finally got her, the nurse marched in to give her a bath the second we were done with the first feed. I made her wait, and then we fought over the bath soap and lotion. Yeah, seriously. I brought some nice natural scent-free stuff because I did not want the god-awful J&J out of the pink bottle that the hospital used. I have a lot of skin issues and that stuff breaks me out and burns. And lo and behold, my child cannot use anything heavily perfumed without breaking out like I do, so I was right to be cautious with her precious newborn skin. The dumbass nurse made a big deal and went to go "get someone's permission" to use my stuff. Then she came back and finally dropped it, probably because I wouldn't be bullied. So many people are afraid to stand up to medical professionals and I think she was taken off guard. And I still don't know what was so awful about bringing in the products I wanted for my child, esp having a good reason to do so.

Ugh, it's been 7.5 years and I still get so worked up when I think about my hospital experience. I swear I was not that damn difficult to work with; I just didn't complacently toe their line.

[fundiemental]

I'm angry reading about some of your experiences! I cannot imagine having to be separated from a newborn for hours for no justifiable reason. And the arrogance of some of the healthcare workers is galling!

[Mama Mia]

My daughter has a horror story regarding her first child's birth where they fucked up her care in every way conceivably possible. After almost killing her, and the baby - she wasn't allowed to even see the baby until the next day ! Because the f)*&&(& b)*)&&) of a nurse was "too busy" to take her down to see her baby in the nicu she couldn't walk and would have to be wheeled on the gurney. The baby was only in the nicu because the hospital screwed up on her care in the first place. And then the bastards made her feel like hell because she couldn't pump every two hours - because she was short on blood and needed a transfusion, still had a fever of 104 had a raging infection and was literally too weak to do anything. They also sabotaged her breastfeeding by insisting on holding the baby with the bottle going straight in, with a fast flow nipple - because they were used to preemies - this baby was not a preemie. Luckily my daughter is stubborn as hell and refused to give the baby formula once she got home, she figured if the baby got hungry enough she would nurse, and she did ! Horrible, horrible people at the hospital.

And I think she was mostly treated so terribly because she happened to be young and latina.

[fundiemental]

I'm really sorry your daughter & her baby had such an awful experience, Mrs S2004. I spent some time doing CNA training in a nursing home and was disappointed in how little so many of the employees seemed to care about the patients. Unfortunately there are a lot of people who shouldn't be in that profession.

[CruitLvr]

First off, I fucking cannot believe he wrote "walla." I really thought that was just a Kristina thing.

Second - no fucking way did he make her lunch all purdy like that. Esther must be off bedrest and back to her wifely duties of submitting to Monsieur Dumbass. This is seriously ridiculous.

I call eleventy bullshit on him sauteeing anything while on a juice fast and making it look pretty before he gives it to anyone.

It took me a few minutes to get what he was even trying to say. At first I honestly assumed "walla" was some type of fruit I'd never heard of. Silly me.

[Buzzard]

It took me a few minutes to get what he was even trying to say. At first I honestly assumed "walla" was some type of fruit I'd never heard of. Silly me.

We have another fundie who spelled "voila" as "walla" and "soaking wet" and "soak and wet." It pops up here every now and then. I havent seen it off of her posts before. MORON.

[Joan of Snarc]

[gilora]

WALLA!!!!!!!!!!!

[attachment=0]lunch.JPG[/attachment]

First off, I fucking cannot believe he wrote "walla." I really thought that was just a Kristina thing.

Second - no fucking way did he make her lunch all purdy like that. Esther must be off bedrest and back to her wifely duties of submitting to Monsieur Dumbass. This is seriously ridiculous.

I call eleventy bullshit on him sauteeing anything while on a juice fast and making it look pretty before he gives it to anyone.

So he put some stuff on a frozen pizza? Or rather half of a frozen pizza? Did the 7 kids share the other half? :roll:

[sugarloaf]

We have another fundie who spelled "voila" as "walla" and "soaking wet" and "soak and wet." It pops up here every now and then. I havent seen it off of her posts before. MORON.

That... did not even occur to me. I assumed it was some sort of American slang I hadn't heard. :shock: I know, intellectually, that there are people who are only barely literate, but bloody hell. "soak and wet"? That doesn't even make sense.

[Nootbar]

WALLA!!!!!!!!!!!

[attachment=0]lunch.JPG[/attachment]

First off, I fucking cannot believe he wrote "walla." I really thought that was just a Kristina thing.

Second - no fucking way did he make her lunch all purdy like that. Esther must be off bedrest and back to her wifely duties of submitting to Monsieur Dumbass. This is seriously ridiculous.

I call eleventy bullshit on him sauteeing anything while on a juice fast and making it look pretty before he gives it to anyone.

OMG what is the deal with him and "turkey ham"??? I don't even know what that is!

[CruitLvr]

OMG what is the deal with him and "turkey ham"??? I don't even know what that is!

He's either trying to say turkey AND ham, or sliced turkey (meaning it's sliced like sandwich ham).

[Coconut Flan]

There is a creation called turkey ham. It's a cousin to turkey bacon.

[Mama Mia]

He's either trying to say turkey AND ham, or sliced turkey (meaning it's sliced like sandwich ham).

Turkey ham is a 'ham' made out of turkey, people usually buy it because it's lower fat etc.. just like they make 'turkey bacon' - it isn't the real thing, but the turkey ham actually tastes pretty close to regular ham.

They sell it in the supermarket in the meat or lunch meat section, usually in a 2 or 3 lb package and you chop or slice it. I haven't bought any in awhile, but it costs around the same as ham if I recall.