CarVan 14: The Abeka Boxes Have Started to Arrive

[HereticHick]

On 11/18/2023 at 7:58 PM, Tdoc72 said:

But yes, they get a lot. Did you see the stuff Kelly brought over, just on a random day?  It was at least 6-7 things for Layla (I’m sure Zade and visiting Hailey got stuff too).  It was a lot of stuff that Kelly could’ve just saved for Xmas. Maybe give her 1 small prize. I know Grandmas can be spoilers but geez. How are she & Gill not broke if she’s buying this stuff for all the grandchildren?  

I am glad to know that I wasn't the only one appalled by Kelly's giant bag of gifts. Lala is being raised to be such a spoiled brat.

[HideousGreenShirt]

I'm sorry, who would want this? 

[JermajestyDuggar]

8 minutes ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

I'm sorry, who would want this? 

Anyone who likes this:

[lumpentheologie]

On 11/19/2023 at 5:08 PM, rebeccawriter01 said:

The organization that Carlin and Evan were buying for is one of the worst - run by Billy Graham's son. I guess it is the thought that counts.

I don’t have a lot of patience for these donated boxes of toys. It’s just more of the same white saviorism we see with Mediccorps. If you actually want to provide toys for kids in other countries, you send money to organizations that will buy the toys in that country. Basic toys cost a lot more in the US than in Mexico, and on top of that you have to pay to get them down there. Not to mention they’re harming the local economy by “underselling” the Mexican stores that would otherwise be supplying those toys. This is all about white people paying to have an experience that allows them to feel charitable, and not much else. 

Edited November 28, 2023 by lumpentheologie

[JermajestyDuggar]

30 minutes ago, lumpentheologie said:

I don’t have a lot of patience for these donated boxes of toys. It’s just more of the same white saviorism we see with Mediccorps. If you actually want to provide toys for kids in other countries, you send money to organizations that will buy the toys in that country. Basic toys cost a lot more in the US than in Mexico, and on top of that you have to pay to get them down there. Not to mention they’re harming the local economy by “underselling” the Mexican stores that would otherwise be supplying those toys. This is all about white people paying to have an experience that allows them to feel charitable, and not much else. 

I’m not the type of person who thinks we should only help kids in our own country. But when I see those boxes of junk for kids thousands of miles away, I can’t help but think of all the teens in foster care that are forgotten about during Christmas toy drives. Teens don’t want toys. They want gift cards. But it’s boring to buy teens in foster care gift cards. It’s much more fun to buy Barbie’s and stuffies for 5 year olds in foster care. So I make it a point to always donate to the teens in foster care. Because they are kids too. And they deserve a good Christmas like the little kids. 

[Melissa1977]

I do the same @JermajestyDuggar. When it comes to buy Christmas gifts for kids in need, I think about +10 year old, because they are often forgotten. In my city it is Red Cross + social services who organise the charity, for kids living in the city. Red Cross do a list of needs, in order that people buy what children wish or need. For example last Christmas Red Cross asked for books, because they already had many toys to gift (stores made donations). The year before they asked for newborn/baby toys. They make gift packs with toys, a book and some other things. 

[rebeccawriter01]

On 11/28/2023 at 1:22 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Anyone who likes this:

I am a fan of beef stew and Julia Child's beef bourguignon. However, I have no interest in a t-shirt supporting Carlin and/or Evan.

[GreenBeans]

On 11/28/2023 at 11:04 PM, lumpentheologie said:

I don’t have a lot of patience for these donated boxes of toys. It’s just more of the same white saviorism we see with Mediccorps

This! 

Also, it’s all just cheap junk. I have no idea if the stuff they are sending even makes any sense for these children. Would they consider that valuable? It is it the same kind of cheap junk they already have?

I agree, the money would be better spent by the caretakers of these children who know them well enough to know what they need. The same money spent on a bunch of cheap plastic junk might be enough to buy one big toy / fulfill an actual wish of a child locally.

But these charity things tied in with religion are never about actually doing good or actually helping people. They are about proselytizing and making the giver feel good about themselves.

[nolongerIFBx]

On 11/28/2023 at 4:04 PM, lumpentheologie said:

I don’t have a lot of patience for these donated boxes of toys. It’s just more of the same white saviorism we see with Mediccorps. If you actually want to provide toys for kids in other countries, you send money to organizations that will buy the toys in that country. Basic toys cost a lot more in the US than in Mexico, and on top of that you have to pay to get them down there. Not to mention they’re harming the local economy by “underselling” the Mexican stores that would otherwise be supplying those toys. This is all about white people paying to have an experience that allows them to feel charitable, and not much else. 

I think it is just pure psychology. People feel more connected/compelled to donate items than donating cash no matter how often you tell them that whatever organization they donate to can actually get more for the cash than you can give. Our local food bank is an example (and not religiously affiliated)- they can make $1 into food for four meals. Your four cans of green beans can't do that. But people still want to personally donate cans rather than go online or to the food bank to donate cash.

And four cans of green beans is better than nothing at all.

Edited November 30, 2023 by nolongerIFBx

[Coconut Flan]

Shopping for me is trouble enough just to get what I need so I always give money to the food bank at church.  They thank me regularly that they can then go get what is needed and due to their discounts get more than if I did the buying.  It's a win for both sides.  

Edited November 30, 2023 by Coconut Flan

[GreenBeans]

1 hour ago, nolongerIFBx said:

I think it is just pure psychology. People feel more connected/compelled to donate items than donating cash no matter how often you tell them that whatever organization they donate to can actually get more for the cash than you can give.

Yes, and people tend to give around Christmas or make one-time donations when something catastrophic happens, even though most organizations depend on or at least can plan and budget better with regular cash flow year round.

I have a monthly donation to Doctors Without Borders set up, because the work they do is important and I want to support that throughout the year.

[Expectopatronus]

For me, donating specific items is fine if they are high need items. My niece’s former orphanage had an extreme need for things like shoes, infant formula, art supplies and sports equipment. None of these are easy to buy in Haiti. All would have to go through a specific organization or be taken directly to the orphanage because mail theft is a common occurrence. The local food bank also is always in need of formula and diapers. If Carlin wants to donate boxes of toys, picking an agency that works in countries where local stores don’t stock pencil crayons, paint, balls, Barbies, Lego etc would be ideal. However, they are trying to think of others so I will give them credit for that. 

[kittykay]

I had always done the Angel Tree in my local area.  If I could manage it, I liked to do a boy, girl and senior.  Specific items (wanted or needed) are listed, and sizes are provided.  There was and is such a great need in my own county.

[gobucks]

Carlin and Evan went to a little getaway for the weekend in a yurt. It looked super cool, not gunna lie. Then, they drove through the night to stay with Katie after her stent surgery since she can't lift Hailey for a week. 

[Kiki03910]

5 hours ago, gobucks said:

Carlin and Evan went to a little getaway for the weekend in a yurt. It looked super cool, not gunna lie. Then, they drove through the night to stay with Katie after her stent surgery since she can't lift Hailey for a week. 

Why do I want to laugh hysterically at the idea of Carlin and Evan in a yurt? Does anyone think they've ever heard of Mongolia?

[postscript]

They had their Christmas a few days early because they’re going to Evan’s family for Christmas. Big gift for the kids was an outdoor play set. It took Evan, Zach (who did the bulk of the work) and a couple of their neighbors a full day to assemble while Carlin kept the kids away. 

They also got a small remote-controlled car. It appeared to be a gift for Zade, but Evan spent way too much time with it and Layla demanded to play with it, provoking a little talk about sharing from Evan. I predict they will soon acquire more remote-controlled cars so Evan. Zade and Layla can all play at the same time. That or the car breaks and they all lose interest. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Look at this white toy with blocks that are a grayish green color. Why would anyone buy this? Why are influencers obsessed with avoiding color? It so weird. And everyone will be making fun of it in 5 years. 

[HereticHick]

Carlin posted the links to the kids gifts. I'm all for a backyard swing set--am curious--do we think they got it free (would have been over $600 including shipping & tax) in exchange for the link? https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CDJHHNZ4 

Or just at a deep discount?

[Keys]

On 12/25/2023 at 10:12 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Look at this white toy with blocks that are a grayish green color. Why would anyone buy this? Why are influencers obsessed with avoiding color? It so weird. And everyone will be making fun of it in 5 years. 

I commented on a thread in the Bates reddit about their toy choices last year - I said Carlin seems to pick toys for the kids that match her aesthetic. For some reason my comment was downvoted excessively. Don’t know why, because it still seems very obvious to me, lol 

[marmalade]

Not surprised by the downvotes. The Bates sub is crawling with leghumpers. 

[Vivi_music]

On 12/25/2023 at 10:12 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Look at this white toy with blocks that are a grayish green color. Why would anyone buy this? Why are influencers obsessed with avoiding color? It so weird. And everyone will be making fun of it in 5 years. 

Oh for sure, a lot of the Bates' mom (Josie, Carlin and Erin come to mind) looooove the sad beige aesthetic.

PS: Look up Sad Beige lady on Instagram. She mocks those type of influencers and she is hilarious.

[CarrotCake]

I really don't understand, there is a whole range of toys in colors between white/beige and loud primary colors.

Even though kids love the primary colors there are so many options to choose that are at least some sort of compromise between parents aesthetic and primary plastics.

 

Spoiler

I do think the one with the shapes is from Mushie and has at least some other color shapes, but it is telling that Carlin photographs only the grey one.

 

Edited December 27, 2023 by CarrotCake

[AussieKrissy]

This popped vid up on Carlins Insta feed and before I registered what it was, I was like, omg she is pregnant. On another note why would I ever be surprised by a Bates baby? It’s just a new dress for the store. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

They have a white dress line now. Which I guess is a good idea. Because the people they sell to are obsessed with getting married and they all need white dresses to wear to their engagement parties, bridal showers, and rehearsal dinners. 

[Melissa1977]

Is she pregnant ot is it an old picture?