Harry & Meghan 14: The Reverse Harry - Restoring the Angevin Empire

[samurai_sarah]

11 hours ago, Jackie3 said:

It does seems that Kate was very uptight and snobbish around Meghan. It's a shame she couldn't have been more welcoming, so that camroderie could have continued.

As plenty of people have said, there are cultural differences and personal preferences. Where I come from, if a stranger tries to hug me, I would consider that to be extremely weird. We don't know each other, please get out of my personal space, stop touching me!

[prayawaythefundie]

1 hour ago, samurai_sarah said:

As plenty of people have said, there are cultural differences and personal preferences. Where I come from, if a stranger tries to hug me, I would consider that to be extremely weird. We don't know each other, please get out of my personal space, stop touching me!

I believe the hugging upon first meeting somebody can make introverts feel uncomfortable or even anxious. (Observing from the outside perspective here, as I‘m very much an extrovert.) I also believe Kate to be an introvert and Meghan to be an extrovert. That and other differences in personality may have made it hard for them to communicate well or feel comfortable around each other. 

Edited January 20, 2023 by prayawaythefundie

[Jackie3]

1 hour ago, samurai_sarah said:

As plenty of people have said, there are cultural differences and personal preferences. Where I come from, if a stranger tries to hug me, I would consider that to be extremely weird. We don't know each other, please get out of my personal space, stop touching me!

But she was a new member of the family, not a stranger. 

I wasn't even thinking of that. I was thinking of her response to the "baby brain" comment. She wasn't just offended, she hung on to those offended feelings and brought it up at a later date, saying, "You don't know me well enough to talk about my hormones." 

Why not just laugh it off?  Why not just say, "Wow, they do things different in the US". It's like she was looking for something to be pissed about.

[Alisamer]

Looking for something to be pissed about? That reminds me of someone...

 

I haven't been able to bring myself to read any more of the book since I heard the audio of that part about him putting the cream on his todger. I'll get to it, but not today. 

I still maintain he needs therapy. And an editor willing to forgo some cash in favor of saying "Um. Harry. I really think you should go through this book with your therapist and sit on it for a few months before publishing it. Please."

[Coconut Flan]

1 hour ago, Alisamer said:

I still maintain he needs therapy. And an editor willing to forgo some cash in favor of saying "Um. Harry. I really think you should go through this book with your therapist and sit on it for a few months before publishing it. Please."

Thank goodness, for Harry's sake, he cut it in half.  I listened to a short article yesterday that said basically Harry is not healthy mentally, he is pissed, he rather paranoidly thinks almost his entire family is out to get him, he will not admit his own errors or that he might possibly have misinterpreted anything, and he won't settle for anything except complete capitulation by his family to his view of his life and a full and complete public apology to him and to Meghan for everything they think they've been hard done by.  

If that's truly Harry's view, then his therapy has not been helpful.  Interestingly it's the same view my neighbor's son who fried his brain on drugs had until about ten years after he finally got clean and sober and went to years of rehab and counseling.  I remember the day he came to apologize to me for all the years of disturbing behavior he exhibited.  That was something like 30 years after the most disturbing incident.  

Kate and Meghan are two vastly, vastly different people.  I've met spouses marrying in and none of them have thankfully tried to hug me.  You are still a stranger to me whether you're marrying a BIL or cousin or whatever.  Plus Meghan kept reoffending Kate.  It isn't even American or California behavior.  It's Meghan behavior without giving a thought to boundaries.  Trying to hug someone you just met, calling someone baby brained, wanting to borrow a lip product, etc.  Those are just the ones the know about.  I'm a Southern Californian and this would be an in-law I'd be polite to and no more in gatherings until she bought a clue she was regularly being far too pushy.  Meghan was marrying into a family where Harry said he never hugged his grandma.  She needed to learn the family culture not expecting other people to be constantly making excuses and allowances for her.  She chose them.  They didn't choose her.  Before you try to reform a family or culture, find out if they're open to being reformed.  

[prayawaythefundie]

3 hours ago, Jackie3 said:

She wasn't just offended, she hung on to those offended feelings and brought it up at a later date

[…]

Why not just laugh it off?  […]
It's like she was looking for something to be pissed about.

Oh, the irony! Harry just published a book full of hanging on to offended feelings and being pissed. 

[treehugger]

I'm pretty sure a certain someone has Meghan and Kate mixed up.  One of them appears to have some self-respect and is capable of expressing personal boundaries, and the other one is pushy and offended at everything.  And she really wants the whole world to know it. 

Edited January 20, 2023 by treehugger

[Jackie3]

13 hours ago, Alisamer said:

Looking for something to be pissed about? That reminds me of someone...

 

I haven't been able to bring myself to read any more of the book since I heard the audio of that part about him putting the cream on his todger. I'll get to it, but not today. 

I still maintain he needs therapy. And an editor willing to forgo some cash in favor of saying "Um. Harry. I really think you should go through this book with your therapist and sit on it for a few months before publishing it. Please."

If you dislike Harry, why are you lining his pockets by buying the audiobook? If it bothers you that much, why "get back to it"?

I really don't understand hating someone, then buying the memoir you hate and reading it, so you can hate him some more? Especially since this process earns him money.

 

11 hours ago, treehugger said:

I'm pretty sure a certain someone has Meghan and Kate mixed up.  One of them appears to have some self-respect and is capable of expressing personal boundaries, and the other one is pushy and pissed off and offended at everything.  And she really wants the whole world to know it. 

Kate had no personal boundaries when it came to lip gloss. Just say "no" if you don't want to share! Instead, she shared it and made a disgusted face. That showed a real lack of boundaries and an inability to say no.

Meghan simply didn't realize how self-important the Cambridges are. The idea of a biracial American actress giving them a hug grossed them out. A biracial American actress who is so forward as to joke about hormones.

Meghan thought she was meeting family. She wasn't awed enough. The Cambridges are used to being held in awe. Her confidence pissed them off. She had the nerve to think she was meeting family.

 

11 hours ago, prayawaythefundie said:

Oh, the irony! Harry just published a book full of hanging on to offended feelings and being pissed. 

Exactly. Harry is writing about a lonely and traumatized childhood, extending over many years. He's perfectly justified in writing about the people he trusted who let him down.

Kate held onto one random comment by a new family member. She isn't a lonely, motherless kid. She was an established family member in a position of power. It was her job to be welcoming, not to seize on excused to be hurt.

 

12 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

Kate and Meghan are two vastly, vastly different people.  I've met spouses marrying in and none of them have thankfully tried to hug me. 

Meghan was showing love. She may have been clumsy, but a loving family would have shown her grace.

An uptight, self-important family would have used any clumsiness as an excuse to reject her. That's what we have going on here. She did not marry into a loving, accepting family. 

I'm not sure what you are saying about Southern California. Did you mean all Southern Californian families act the same, and you are reporting how they behave? 

 

 

10 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

I don't know I just feel like not-touching-strangers-and-slight-acquaintances is the norm and you'd have to explain the exceptions, not the default

Maybe it is the norm, but so what? A new member of the family makes a clumsy move and. . . ?

In a healthy family environment, they'd laugh and move on.  They'd write it off as shyness or awkwardness. They'd do their best to make Meghan feel welcome.

 

12 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

  I listened to a short article yesterday that said basically Harry is not healthy mentally, he is pissed, he rather paranoidly thinks almost his entire family is out to get him,

Is that paranoid or realistic? There's plenty of evidence his family did not have his best interests at heart.

 

9 hours ago, treehugger said:

@prayawaythefundie I agree with you.  I'm a hardcore introvert, so my personal sympathies lie entirely with Kate on the hugging thing... but I can see that it would be extremely difficult for an extrovert.  I think Meghan is desperately looking for friendship everywhere.  She seems to be incredibly lonely, and all the "friends" she has don't really seem to be the close type.  I feel bad for her, because I think it must be very hard.  But from personal experience, she seems like an exhausting type of person to be around for an introvert.  

I think Meghan expected the royal family to be warm and friendly behind the scenes. I think she was raised with love and generally encountered friendship and kindness. Everyone from her past speaks so highly of her--she's used to acceptance and warmth. 

She was wrong about the royal family. They are not like that.

 

8 hours ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Hawree's book did not help his popularity in the US or the UK one bit.

I don't think he wrote the book to become popular in the US. Why does everyone feel that popularity with the masses is so vital? Harry has everything he needs, whether or not he is "popular" with random people.

Also, that's a tabloid.

 

6 hours ago, viii said:

None of that surprises me. If you believe the stories about Diana raising the boys as equals and assuring Harry he would get everything William did, I'm not surprised he threw a fit over housing. 

Asking Granny for a different house isn't "throwing a fit." 

Apparently he is just expected to take what he is given. No wonder he wanted out!

Of course Harry should get everything William has. It's never going to end well if you favor one son over another. Why wouldn't Harry expect to be treated equally? Are you saying it's wrong for him to expect to be treated equally?

So Charlotte should expect lesser housing compared to George? And you think she'll just be content with that? 

 

8 hours ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

One of the Queen's biographer's (who spent a good deal of time with HM) told the Telegraph this week that Meghan was fine with her lodging at Nottingham Cottage until she saw Catherine's apartment at Kensington Palace. She apparently threw a fit, despite the fact that they were offered the similar flat next door and the possibility of Clarence House when Charles took the throne. That is how the while 3.5 million pound renovation of Frogmore came to be.

Why would it be fair to treat one son better than the other?

However, I think the narrative of "Meghan as a jealous bitch" appeals to you, so go with it. Meghan apparently was not allowed to have a preference or opinion--if they gave her a Quonset hut she should be happy! No wonder those two struck out on their own.

 

4 hours ago, tabitha2 said:

She knew very well that was never going to be the case… I just can’t fathom why she would knowingly  do that and set him up for all this trouble now,. 

You have quite the anger against this young biracial woman you've never met. 

 

 

Netflix made a good choice signing Meghan and Harry! I bet they'll be working for Netflix again. 

https://www.geo.tv/latest/466164-harry-meghan-enticed-new-viewers-as-netflix-soars-to-230-mn-subscribers?fbclid=IwAR0itGIHb8bgxWmG-Bunl9mFuxWvso-RFxKIDya_KgZul9nFUZnwWeEVajM

 

Harry and Meghan is Netflix's second most popular documentary of all time. Of all time!

https://www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/harry-meghan-announced-as-netflix-s-second-most-successful-documentary-series-b1054385.html

[nelliebelle1197]

6 hours ago, samurai_sarah said:

As plenty of people have said, there are cultural differences and personal preferences. Where I come from, if a stranger tries to hug me, I would consider that to be extremely weird. We don't know each other, please get out of my personal space, stop touching me!

My husband is from NZ and this is very much their culture as well. His dad is from rural Ireland and again, his generation/culture was not physically affectionate.

[AmazonGrace]

I don't know I just feel like not-touching-strangers-and-slight-acquaintances is the norm and you'd have to explain the exceptions, not the default

[prayawaythefundie]

I don‘t think Meghan‘s approach is wrong per se and I see how she would have suffered from repeated incidents like the hugging one.

If you are very outgoing, having many „warm“ and informal interactions is a need for you. If your initiative is met with reticence, you may feel rejected. For personalities as different as Meghan‘s & Kate‘s, being friends as opposed to just being polite would require great effort from both sides. One would have to very much leave their comfort zone and the other one would have to understand boundaries they don‘t feel themselves. How much effort was made from either side is anyone‘s guess. The thing is, Kate would probably have felt that being polite is enough, while Meghan needed friendship.

Not having enough social contact can cause depression quite easily. I think royal life is much more isolated than it looks from the outside. While the introvert might deal with that, it can be hell for the extrovert.

Edited January 20, 2023 by prayawaythefundie

[treehugger]

@prayawaythefundie I agree with you.  I'm a hardcore introvert, so my personal sympathies lie entirely with Kate on the hugging thing... but I can see that it would be extremely difficult for an extrovert.  I think Meghan is desperately looking for friendship everywhere.  She seems to be incredibly lonely, and all the "friends" she has don't really seem to be the close type.  I feel bad for her, because I think it must be very hard.  But from personal experience, she seems like an exhausting type of person to be around for an introvert.  

[prayawaythefundie]

@treehugger I totally see how it would be exhausting for you as an introvert. Being socially needy can be exhausting for the extrovert as well.

[nelliebelle1197]

Hawree's book did not help his popularity in the US or the UK one bit.

[Manda]

4 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

Kate and Meghan are two vastly, vastly different people.  I've met spouses marrying in and none of them have thankfully tried to hug me.  You are still a stranger to me whether you're marrying a BIL or cousin or whatever.  Plus Meghan kept reoffending Kate.  It isn't even American or California behavior.  It's Meghan behavior without giving a thought to boundaries.

Harry has tried to pass off Meghan's behavior as American and it was prejudice against her American behavior, among other things, that caused problems.  He's wrong because it's not standard American behavior.  That's what people have tried to tell him and he won't listen.  Meghan didn't try to fit in.  She kept wanting her way.  If Kate didn't want to be hugged, why would you go even more down the road and discuss her hormones or ask to borrow make up?  Read the room as people keep saying. 

[nelliebelle1197]

5 minutes ago, Manda said:

Harry has tried to pass off Meghan's behavior as American and it was prejudice against her American behavior, among other things, that caused problems.  He's wrong because it's not standard American behavior.  That's what people have tried to tell him and he won't listen.  Meghan didn't try to fit in.  She kept wanting her way.  If Kate didn't want to be hugged, why would you go even more down the road and discuss her hormones or ask to borrow make up?  Read the room as people keep saying. 

One of the Queen's biographer's (who spent a good deal of time with HM) told the Telegraph this week that Meghan was fine with her lodging at Nottingham Cottage until she saw Catherine's apartment at Kensington Palace. She apparently threw a fit, despite the fact that they were offered the similar flat next door and the possibility of Clarence House when Charles took the throne. That is how the while 3.5 million pound renovation of Frogmore came to be.

[Coconut Flan]

40 minutes ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

One of the Queen's biographer's (who spent a good deal of time with HM) told the Telegraph this week that Meghan was fine with her lodging at Nottingham Cottage until she saw Catherine's apartment at Kensington Palace. She apparently threw a fit, despite the fact that they were offered the similar flat next door and the possibility of Clarence House when Charles took the throne. That is how the while 3.5 million pound renovation of Frogmore came to be.

Which completely misses the fact that Catherine and William lived in Nott Cott for a time before they moved into 1-A.  They didn't start out in palatial surroundings either.

[QuiverFullofBooks]

24 minutes ago, Coconut Flan said:

Which completely misses the fact that Catherine and William lived in Nott Cott for a time before they moved into 1-A.  They didn't start out in palatial surroundings either.

It’s in the book, and Harry observes that they moved to a larger place when they started a family, so he and Meghan felt that they should be able to do so once she was pregnant. He does record Meghan’s awe at her first glimpse of the interior of the Cambridges’ apartment, and I wouldn’t be surprised if she was pissed off about it later.

[viii]

None of that surprises me. If you believe the stories about Diana raising the boys as equals and assuring Harry he would get everything William did, I'm not surprised he threw a fit over housing. 

[tabitha2]

She knew very well that was never going to be the case… I just can’t fathom why she would knowingly  do that and set him up for all this trouble now,. 

[WatchingTheTireFireBurn]

I wonder if there really is much of anything between Meghan and Kate.

All these things sound like things that would have been forgotten were it not all tangled together under the microscope.

 

But Harry's mental status seems concerning from all angles and consistently over years now. I hope when he's within his bubble of CA life he is able to put some of this aside and enjoy his family.

Charles must be very distressed. His message (during Xmas speech?) That they'd always be loved seemed genuine. But I'm sure he can't conceive of any way to realistically deal with Harry at this point.

[nelliebelle1197]

Just FYI, someone claimed the Daily Beast is a tabloid. It is not. It was founded by Tina Brown, the English former managing editor of Vanity Fair. The name is taken from a paper in an Evelyn Waugh novel. The Daily Beast is an online national newspaper and its writers have been instrumental in covering Jan 6, QAnon and broke a lot of the George Santos stories before anyone else. It covers a lot of the extreme right that major outlets ignore because they still desperately want to believe Republicans are sane.

If someone thinks DB is a tabloid, someone is totally ignorant.

Edited January 21, 2023 by nelliebelle1197

[Manda]

https://www.geo.tv/latest/466309-prince-harry-book-branded-very-purple-for-himself-he-has-no-clue-what-it-means

Quote

Editor of Majesty Magazine, Ingrid Seward, says the Duke of Sussex has picked the wrong ghostwriter for his memoir as the passages contain words he might not understand himself.

She said: "I also feel that possibly they picked the wrong ghost-writer for [Harry].

"The book is very flowery, it's very purple, and half the words in the book, you know that Harry hasn't got a clue what they mean."

Harry's book has been penned by author JR Moehringer.

For sure.  There are many sections that sound nothing like Harry.  

[Jackie3]

On 1/20/2023 at 12:10 PM, nelliebelle1197 said:

One of the Queen's biographer's (who spent a good deal of time with HM) told the Telegraph this week that Meghan was fine with her lodging at Nottingham Cottage until she saw Catherine's apartment at Kensington Palace. She apparently threw a fit, despite the fact that they were offered the similar flat next door and the possibility of Clarence House when Charles took the throne. That is how the while 3.5 million pound renovation of Frogmore came to be.

Well, that makes sense. Why should William have a better home than Harry? That's no way to treat two siblings.

Frogmore needed renovations anyway. I have a book written in the 80's that says Frogmore was a mess and needed many updates.

At least Harry and Meghan paid back the cost of the renovations. William and Kate have never paid back a cent for any of their renovations. In fact, they have renovated places and then moved shortly thereafter! They do nothing but take.

 

On 1/21/2023 at 5:52 AM, nelliebelle1197 said:

Just FYI, someone claimed the Daily Beast is a tabloid. It is not. It was founded by Tina Brown, the English former managing editor of Vanity Fair. The name is taken from a paper in an Evelyn Waugh novel. The Daily Beast is an online national newspaper and its writers have been instrumental in covering Jan 6, QAnon and broke a lot of the George Santos stories before anyone else. It covers a lot of the extreme right that major outlets ignore because they still desperately want to believe Republicans are sane.

If someone thinks DB is a tabloid, someone is totally ignorant.

The publisher of the Daily Beast calls it a "high end tabloid".

I'd think they'd know.

 

On 1/14/2023 at 10:48 AM, treehugger said:

His obsession with Williams kids is so weird to me. I get that he doesn’t want any of them to feel like spares, but I do think their upbringing is light years away from his own. Diana seemed like a lovely person, but not a particularly stable one. Katherine on the other hand, if somewhat reserved, does seem to have come from a stable, reasonably caring family, and I’m sure there’s a vast difference between how Williams kids are being raised and how William and Harry were brought up. We have learned so much about childhood development in 30 years, and Katherine seems to be very interested in that. She also, while extremely wealthy, was not titled growing up. Basically, he’s afraid that his niece and nephew are going have the same struggles he did, even though they still have their mother, the biggest drama in their life comes from him,  and the world has changed so much. 

Maybe Katherine is not all she appears. We have only tabloid articles and brief interviews to go by. You can't assess someone's parenting skills on that basis.

It is worth thinking about.  How entrenched is this habit of preference to the heir? Why are we just assuming that Charlotte and Louis are OK? The Palace is ruled by tradition--the tradition of favoring the heir may NOT have died. 

Again, you can't tell everything from pictures. But in photographs, George always looks unhappy, and Charlotte seems quite anxious. Maybe there is something to worry about.

 

On 1/20/2023 at 3:22 PM, tabitha2 said:

She knew very well that was never going to be the case… I just can’t fathom why she would knowingly  do that and set him up for all this trouble now,. 

I do hate to see women attacking other women, and assuming they manipulate their men. Harry is responsible for his own actions.

Honestly, his life seems to be going quite well. He's achieved everything he hoped for by leaving the UK.

 

Harry is the most popular royal in the US.

https://globalnews.ca/news/9422258/prince-william-prince-harry-popularity/

 

Spare is getting rave reviewers by readers. Almost no one says he "needs help" or that his "mental status seems concerning." 

Reviewers love the book.

Edited January 21, 2023 by Jackie3

[Smash!]

Oh well I have an extendend family member like Harry who plays the victim over things who happened when he was growing up. It’s tragic. In my family members case his parents have apologized for what they did wrong (and as someone said, everyone’s truth is different) and the whole family made concessions to him. Yet he still can’t move on from the victim play and new accusations pop up. It doesn’t help that both his ex and current wife enable his thinking that he got and is still getting wronged by his family (it involves money as well) even objectively this couldn’t be further from what happened. It’s sad but IMO the only way to stay sane is to cut such people out of your life.