Maxwell 38: Forgotten Jesse and the Spinsters Have to Replace the Vests for the Wedding

[Coconut Flan]

Continued from here:

Jesse isn't quite as forgotten these days as we wait to see if the wedding takes place or not and how they handle it while supposedly social distancing.  I did not get to select the photo from the old thread.  Er, hm.

[Italiangirl]

I have to say it I love the new thread title and especially the photo ?

[JermajestyDuggar]

Someone in the last thread suggested that some fundie women have to convince their husbands to let them wear pants while making them think it was his decision. And I imagine this goes on quite a bit in fundie households. These women have to scheme so their husband will let them do something they shouldn’t have to seek his approval for. I am a shorts person. I wear them in the winter. I wear them all the time. Don’t worry, they aren’t tiny white ones  But if I had to somehow trick my husband into letting me wear them all the time I would die a bit inside. 

Edited May 16, 2020 by JermajestyDuggar

[Maggie Mae]

 @PennySycamore said: 

Quote

I was reading an article several months ago (Food and Wine?  New Yorker? Vogue? Somewhere else entirely?) about how the "smart kitchen" hasn't exactly panned out.   One of the cooktops I'm considering has  the stuff to connect to an app where you can control the cooktop remotely.  I can't think of anything more useless on a gas cooktop.

I'd like to see that article.  We still make fun of the fact that our immersion cooker (sous vide) has an app. For one, we don't need an app on a machine that is 100% "set it and leave it for hours" and two, the app only works through the wifi, so it's a privacy violation on top of being completely useless.  Home automation with lights and self-learning thermostats are nice, but I'm still sitting here like "are light switches that difficult to use?"  

[anjulibai]

12 minutes ago, Maggie Mae said:

 @PennySycamore said: 

I'd like to see that article.  We still make fun of the fact that our immersion cooker (sous vide) has an app. For one, we don't need an app on a machine that is 100% "set it and leave it for hours" and two, the app only works through the wifi, so it's a privacy violation on top of being completely useless.  Home automation with lights and self-learning thermostats are nice, but I'm still sitting here like "are light switches that difficult to use?"  

I don't know, I kind of like being able to turn the light on and off without getting out of bed. Plus, if I think I might have forgotten to turn a light off in another room, I just say "Turn all lights off" and it's done. Plus, there's the dimmer feature. 

My family has 4 echo dots and one google home device (my dad got that one for free and gave it to us). We have them in the bedrooms, the kitchen and the living room. We use them primarily to communicate through the apartment instead of yelling, play music, set alarms, and ask about the weather or time. They've been nice to have, honestly. 

[mango_fandango]

Forgotten Jesse and the Spinsters sounds like a band. Hey, the family have played bluegrass in the past... 

[onekidanddone]

31 minutes ago, mango_fandango said:

Forgotten Jesse and the Spinsters sounds like a band. Hey, the family have played bluegrass in the past... 

Josie and the Pussy Cats came to mind when I read this 

[Maggie Mae]

28 minutes ago, anjulibai said:

I don't know, I kind of like being able to turn the light on and off without getting out of bed. Plus, if I think I might have forgotten to turn a light off in another room, I just say "Turn all lights off" and it's done. Plus, there's the dimmer feature. 

We have dimmers on some of our switches but turning on and off lights and getting out of bed has never been an issue for us. Due to the privacy stuff, we'll likely never get any of those devices that listen in, and the tv has been blocked from the wifi (you can't buy a non-smart tv at Costco). I can see the draw for bigger families with kids who like to leave stuff on, but it just seems so pointless for us. 

We have a sound system to play music and our phones have weather and timers, and so does the oven, the microwave, and the chromecast. 

The only thing I want automated is the thermostat, honestly, turn down at night and back up in the morning. And down again when no one is home, back up when we get home to save $$$. 

[nvmbr02]

We only have a few of our lights connected through the wifi but we use it to turn lights on and off in a few random rooms when we aren't home for long periods of time. 

Our house is fairly connected (ring doorbell, security camera, a few lights, thermostat, etc...) so the privacy thing just isn't a huge concern at this point. We just made the choice years ago that we would either be off the grid completely or just not worry too much about it and we have chosen the latter for the most part. I understand the concern and I think it is a valid enough concern, but just isn't practical for our current lifestyle.

[Maggie Mae]

2 minutes ago, nvmbr02 said:

Our house is fairly connected (ring doorbell, security camera, a few lights, thermostat, etc...) 

We want a doorbell camera, but I absolutely will not give any money to Vivint, due their shitty salespeople, and ring seems so invasive, same with nest. I know i know. We'll probably get something like that soon, but the idea of lights being connected is just weird - we figured out how light switches work as children and it's not like it's difficult or they take time to use. But we're pretty responsible about turning off things that aren't in use (I still remember the unparalleled and absolute feeling of JOY of not having to listen to my dad's TV from the second I got up until the second he went to bed at night when I moved out) and having to find an app on the phone to use it seems like it would be more difficult than just hitting a switch. Maybe if the house was bigger? Still, I can't stand having things left on that aren't actively in use, so it's not a priority. I understand that other people are different.  

[indianabones]

3 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Someone in the last thread suggested that some fundie women have to convince their husbands to let them wear pants while making them think it was his decision. And I imagine this goes on quite a bit in fundie households. These women have to scheme so their husband will let them do something they shouldn’t have to seek his approval for.

The man is the head of the household, but the woman is the neck!

[HerNameIsBuffy]

14 minutes ago, indianabones said:

The man is the head of the household, but the woman is the neck!

Katy Perry did a whole thing  on this in Kimmel’s “mom texts” bit.

[JermajestyDuggar]

24 minutes ago, indianabones said:

The man is the head of the household, but the woman is the neck!

Not in my house! We are a two headed monster

[SPHASH]

Forgotten Jesse and the Spinsters have to replace the vests for the wedding is my all time favorite thread title. BTW the wedding is supposed to be a week from today.

Edited May 17, 2020 by SPHASH
Eta

[JordynDarby5]

My brother and sister-in-law got put up cameras. Mostly because their right next to a busy street and for all wildlife that roams around their area. Its somehow programmed into my brother's phone. It works great except for the one time when we wanted to surprise my brother's for his big 40 birthday by putting up Over the Hill signs and balloons (its a tradition started by my mom who was always putting balloons, taping signs and sticking Over the Hill signs in the yards of all her friends and family who turned 40. And yes she got the same treatment from everyone when it was her turn.). He saw it and almost called the cops until he noticed Dad and called to ask what he was doing. So much for the surprise. The next year when it was his wife's turn Dad called him a couple days before and told him he'd be going over to put up signs and balloons and to please not call the cops on him. 

[Hane]

About fundie women and their influence on their husbands: I’ve lost count of all the women we’ve covered here on FJ who are all for being SAHMs and skirts-only and no-BC and homeschoolers, while their husbands are lukewarm about the whole thing, or even putting up with it all against their will.

I’m thinking of *wink*smile* Large Families On Purpose. The wife was all *Halloween is SATANIC!!!11!!!!!1!*, while her husband had all kinds of Halloween stuff on his business blog. Shortly thereafter, the kids were all in public school and then radio silence.

Edited May 17, 2020 by Hane

[JermajestyDuggar]

13 minutes ago, Hane said:

About fundie women and their influence on their husbands: I’ve lost count of all the women we’ve covered here on FJ who are all for being SAHMs and skirts-only and no-BC and homeschoolers, while their husbands are lukewarm about the whole thing, or even putting up with it all against their will.

I’m thinking of *wink*smile* Large Families On Purpose. The wife was all *Halloween is SATANIC!!!11!!!!!1!*, while her husband had all kinds of Halloween stuff on his business blog. Shortly thereafter, the kids were all in public school and then radio silence.

This is exactly why I think people who claim patriarchy is “natural” is complete bullshit. It’s not. Some men don’t want to lead. Some men would prefer their wives to make a lot of the decisions. I honestly think a couple should decide for themselves how they want their marriage to work. And not just have one template for everyone and if it doesn’t work for you, then oh well. Pray about it and deal.

[Dru]

Off topic-ish, I had a good 45 minute cooking amd cleaning session listening to 'I Wanna be Sedated ' by Remones. A perfect fit for these times in my mind:

20, 20, 20, 4, hours to go
I wanna be sedated
Nothing to do, nowhere to go, oh
I wanna be sedated

Then it hit me, This is basically the thoughts  of Steve's daughters' reality, even if they can't consciously recognize  it.

 

That being said, can.seone sedate me? Lol

[deborahlynn1979]

YOU GUYS, TERRI REVEALED HER SECRETS TO MONTHLY SHOPPING ON THE BLOG TODAY!

 

Get this...she uses LISTS!!!!!!!!!!!! Brilliant!!!!!

[HerNameIsBuffy]

11 minutes ago, deborahlynn1979 said:

YOU GUYS, TERRI REVEALED HER SECRETS TO MONTHLY SHOPPING ON THE BLOG TODAY!

 

Get this...she uses LISTS!!!!!!!!!!!! Brilliant!!!!!

After shopping this weekend where a grown man blocked aisle after aisle being on the phone with someone asking "what do you need in this aisle?"  and another couple brought their small kids (~3-4) to run around with masks pulled down touching EVERYTHING and jumping out at strangers, where the "adults" were discussing every fucking item like they were choosing a wedding venue I've come to realize there are a lot of people out there who don't understand the concept of lists.

[the cost accounting part of me likes that she does a physical inventory and records her safety stock numbers.]

 

Edited May 18, 2020 by HerNameIsBuffy

[daisyjane1234]

28 minutes ago, deborahlynn1979 said:

YOU GUYS, TERRI REVEALED HER SECRETS TO MONTHLY SHOPPING ON THE BLOG TODAY!

 

Get this...she uses LISTS!!!!!!!!!!!! Brilliant!!!!!

Oh come on, there is so much more to it.  She uses lists AND she does a monthly shopping trip to COSTCO for staples, as well as a weekly shopping trip locally.  

But seriously, I was actually interested in what she might say.  We have a similar household composition to the Maxwells at the moment since during COVID shutdown my adult kids have returned home.  We have six adults in our home.  Three are young (19, 21, 23, two are boys) and have voracious appetites.   Two of us are vegetarians who lean toward a whole food/plant based diet, and the whole family eats mostly unprocessed, cooked from scratch, food.  We go through fresh produce like nobody's business.

Rather than the obvious (using lists, stock up staples via COSTCO, produce and fresh ingredients locally) I would have appreciated details.  How do they keep enough produce in the house - we struggle with that. I can buy three bunches of bananas and they will be gone in two days.  How do they manage different meals (meat/WFPB), and therefore different grocery needs.  They've talked about adult kids making their own dinners since lunch is their main meal, and that the "kids" buy "special" ingredients, but what is special?  Can adult kids ask for specific items to be purchased when she's out?  We post our lists and ask all members of the household to add any items they would like.   And so on.........

Her post was so devoid of meaningful information, and made shopping appear to be such a labour intensive effort.  That was one of Terri's first posts where I felt her depression was palpable.  

[kpmom]

Hey!  We also shop monthly at Costco for staples, and weekly at a local grocery store!

See?  God likes me best!! ?  The rest of you?  Well...

[ElizaB]

21 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

This is exactly why I think people who claim patriarchy is “natural” is complete bullshit. It’s not. Some men don’t want to lead. Some men would prefer their wives to make a lot of the decisions. I honestly think a couple should decide for themselves how they want their marriage to work. And not just have one template for everyone and if it doesn’t work for you, then oh well. Pray about it and deal.

I remember one of the Pearl daughters talking about being shocked when her new husband asked her where she wanted to stop for lunch while on a long drive. She said something about how she was used to her dad pulling in where/when he wanted. Her thought on this was her husbands was still her leader; he just wanted her opinion and that was the way he led (or something like that). I remember thinking- no your husband is just not as much of an ass as your dad.  

22 minutes ago, daisyjane1234 said:

Oh come on, there is so much more to it.  She uses lists AND she does a monthly shopping trip to COSTCO for staples, as well as a weekly shopping trip locally.  

But seriously, I was actually interested in what she might say.  We have a similar household composition to the Maxwells at the moment since during COVID shutdown my adult kids have returned home.  We have six adults in our home.  Three are young (19, 21, 23, two are boys) and have voracious appetites.   Two of us are vegetarians who lean toward a whole food/plant based diet, and the whole family eats mostly unprocessed, cooked from scratch, food.  We go through fresh produce like nobody's business.

Rather than the obvious (using lists, stock up staples via COSTCO, produce and fresh ingredients locally) I would have appreciated details.  How do they keep enough produce in the house - we struggle with that. I can buy three bunches of bananas and they will be gone in two days.  How do they manage different meals (meat/WFPB), and therefore different grocery needs.  They've talked about adult kids making their own dinners since lunch is their main meal, and that the "kids" buy "special" ingredients, but what is special?  Can adult kids ask for specific items to be purchased when she's out?  We post our lists and ask all members of the household to add any items they would like.   And so on.........

Her post was so devoid of meaningful information, and made shopping appear to be such a labour intensive effort.  That was one of Terri's first posts where I felt her depression was palpable.  

And the thing is I think Terri probably does have a pretty good system if she could just find a way to articulate it. While her depression was horrible for everyone; it did result in her coming up with some very organized systems in order to make it through life. 

[usmcmom]

I really wanted to see the list. It is most likely something she keeps on the computer and can be easily updated. But, is it arranged by aisle/store layout? I like that kind of stuff too and was interested in seeing how she managed, especially with the diet she and Steve follow.

I tend to keep a running grocery list in my fridge. When I am ready to go to the store, I rewrite it amd get it organized by aisle if I can. My husband has done most of the shopping during the pandemic. I don’t know if I can remember the layout of the stores anymore.
 

Sometimes I really like to “browse” at the grocery store.  Does that make me weird? I love to go up and down the aisles, without rushing, and look for things I haven’t tried before.  I don’t think we’re supposed to do that now, but I am kind of in the mood for a leisurely grocery stroll. I wonder of Teri is allowed to shop for things that aren’t on the list. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I love ordering my groceries online and picking them up. It has really sucked these past few months though. Before the pandemic, I only had a few substitutions and there were always plenty of times to pick up. The pandemic hit and suddenly they were out of 15 things on my list and I would have to order my groceries a week in advance. It’s getting a little better now. But still love grocery pick up. But I’ve always hated grocery shopping in person. I’m not going to list the million reasons why I hate it because there are a lot! Teri might like grocery pick up. Some people don’t but you never know.