Josiah & Lauren 13: Drift, Duggars, Drift (Miscarriage Content Warning)

[AliceInFundyland]

I do applaud Marjorie but minus eleventy points for using multiple living creatures.as a dress! I am appalled.

[jqlgoblue]

20 hours ago, Glasgowghirl said:

True, I don't see why she doesn't just wait until Derick is home or go and ask a sibling to take the pictures, Jessa takes good pictures of Spurgeon and Henry and would do better job at taking pictures than Israel.

I can guess why she doesn't ask Derick. I'm betting there is a lot of grumbling.

As for the sibs... it is interesting that she doesn't seem to hang w/ the whole crew over at the TTHC. She'd get more support there.

[Ivycoveredtower]

10 minutes ago, jqlgoblue said:

I can guess why she doesn't ask Derick. I'm betting there is a lot of grumbling.

As for the sibs... it is interesting that she doesn't seem to hang w/ the whole crew over at the TTHC. She'd get more support there.

the last time I saw Jill publicly mentioned by the family was Izzy's birthday and interestingly it was only the women going to the park for his birthday.  I believe anna called it a moms and kids party. 

[TheMustardCardigan]

Interestingly enough, Jill and Jinger both follow Marjorie on Instagram. 

[Ivycoveredtower]

14 minutes ago, TheMustardCardigan said:

Interestingly enough, Jill and Jinger both follow Marjorie on Instagram. 

well I mean it's not like fundy world is that big everyone knows everyone, I mean look at the Bates still hanging out with Ashley

[lizzybee]

I mean another thing to consider is that Derick is probably gone most of the day when she’s got the best light to take a good photo. 

[ihaveanexamintwodays]

On 5/10/2019 at 8:05 PM, neurogirl said:

I'm not sure where is the best place to put this, and I do wish Josiah and Lauren the best, but I would just like to point out Marjorie Jackson continuing to live her life. She graduated from Bob Jones University in December, has published two devotional children's books, is serving as a speaker at the Christian conferences in their circle, and was just in the Caribbean wearing a normal bathing suit. Her younger sister is currently studying at Oral Roberts, as well.

She actually went to John Brown U! Still private and majorly Christian but JBU is actually reputable and accredited at a much better level than dinky ol' Bob Jones lol. 

[neurogirl]

2 hours ago, ihaveanexamintwodays said:

She actually went to John Brown U! Still private and majorly Christian but JBU is actually reputable and accredited at a much better level than dinky ol' Bob Jones lol. 

Geez why do I keep making that mistake! I do know there’s a difference. Thank you thank you for keeping the record straight.

[Ivycoveredtower]

Josiah seems sweet and that he really cares for Lauren. I couldn't see Jim Bob or JOsh making a post like this.  Joe maybe

Edited May 12, 2019 by Ivycoveredtower

[Snarkasarus Rex]

I thought that was a sweet post.  I’m sure Mother’s Day was hard on her, and it doesn’t help that she has four pregnant SILs, all of whom have at least one other child.

[Ivycoveredtower]

3 minutes ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

I thought that was a sweet post.  I’m sure Mother’s Day was hard on her, and it doesn’t help that she has four pregnant SILs, all of whom have at least one other child.

probably even worse that she would be due in less then a month and also the same Day Jessa is due. I would break if i constently had to be around a SIL who shared my due date after I'd had a miscarriage. 

[VelociRapture]

1 hour ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

Josiah seems sweet and that he really cares for Lauren. I couldn't see Jim Bob or JOsh making a post like this.  Joe maybe

This was a very sweet and supportive post to make on what could have been a difficult day for her. I know a lot of people were hesitant or concerned about how they’d do as a couple and I won’t deny there was some cause for concern at times - they have seemed awkward at times. I’m glad Josiah appears to be the type of husband who genuinely cares about his spouse’s feelings though and that it appears he’s been doing his best to support and protect her through a difficult experience. 

I could see JimBob at least trying to make a post like this. Same with Joe and the Sons-in-Law. I don’t think it would be as well stated, but I could see all of them at least trying and sometimes knowing effort was made is all that really matters. I don’t really see John doing this, but that’s mostly because he’s more private and quieter. I think he’d offer support to Abbie privately, but not through such a public platform like social media. Josh? No. Five years ago I could see him turning it into a smug anti-abortion thing somehow, but I don’t think I can really picture him offering public support like this to Anna. I’d hope he’d be better in private if she ever needed it, but I have basically the lowest possible expectations for him at this point. 

[imokit]

I think that's the first time a Duggar has made me cry.  That's genuinely super sweet and a lovely thing for Josiah to do.

[bal maiden]

That post just seems a bit pro-life/anti-choice propaganda by stealth to me. 

[Sullie06]

On 5/10/2019 at 8:49 PM, Audrey2 said:

Let's see, according to JRod, the neckline is too low, the sleeves too short, the hem way too high, and not enough make-up. Also, the hair isn't high enough.

Cuz you know.... the higher the hair the closer to god! 

[meee]

Oh, that's a beautiful Mother's Day message from Josiah. ❤️

[VelociRapture]

2 hours ago, bal maiden said:

That post just seems a bit pro-life/anti-choice propaganda by stealth to me. 

Eh. I understand your wariness and skepticism given their beliefs. I don’t think that was really Josiah’s intention though. Subtly isn’t really a strong suit of the Duggars. I feel like if it was meant to be an anti-choice message then it would have pretty much beaten everyone over the head with how obvious it was. Mother’s Day can be a very difficult day for a lot of people. I’d guess it’s likely it was tough for Lauren this year considering the pregnancy she lost would have been due in just a few short weeks and so many of her in-laws are expecting babies right now, including one who is due on what would have been her due date. I honestly think Si wrote it strictly as a form of showing his love and support for Lauren. 

Additionally, a lot of people express the same sentiments after a loss as Si expressed here without being anti-choice. There are tons of quotes and graphics online about remembering moms who have lost their pregnancies or never got to hold their babies.* I didn’t really count myself as a mom following my loss because it was so early (earlier than Lauren’s.) I was still heartbroken, but I didn’t really feel like a mother at that point. I didn’t feel like a mom until I heard my daughter’s heartbeat for the first time around the 6 or 7 week mark. Not everyone feels the same about that though and I can respect that other women do feel like moms after a loss like my own.

*I know because I looked for general messages of support for anyone having a tough time for any reason on Mother’s Day this year - my SIL lost her mother almost two years ago, my sister’s SIL did as well, I have a friend who’s mom appears to have suffered permanent brain injuries in a bad car accident a few years ago, I know people who don’t speak with their moms, I know a few couples that struggled to have a family at all, and I know families that have lost pregnancies and children. Social media can be a beautiful way of connecting people, but it also has a habit of rubbing salt into wounds on days like Mother’s Day - all those happy posts people make praising their mom can really hurt for people who can’t or don’t have a reason to celebrate. I wanted to find something to post that offered my support and love to some of the people I care about on what was a tough day for many. 

[JesSky03]

That was really, really sweet of Josiah to acknowledge Lauren on mother's day.  It must so incredibly difficult to be surrounded by all those pregnant women. I know I struggled when my sister got pregnant several months after I had a miscarriage and I still wasn't pregnant again yet. I hope Lauren was able to find some enjoyment in the day and to take some time to herself if she just needed a moment.

[Meggo]

On ‎5‎/‎10‎/‎2019 at 9:17 PM, OyToTheVey said:

Marjorie living the life! You can still be religious without being crazy. She’s living proof. 

 

PS the bathing suit is really cute. 

Agreed - like way to GO Marjorie! Dodge that bullet. She wouldn't have been able to do anything like this if she'd been tied to the Duggar clan.

[Bad Wolf]

2 minutes ago, Meggo said:

Agreed - like way to GO Marjorie! Dodge that bullet. She wouldn't have been able to do anything like this if she'd been tied to the Duggar clan.

Maybe JB and M saw a potential problem and discouraged the relationship.

[TheMustardCardigan]

Every time I see a post about the miscarriage subject with Lauren it just makes me sad because at this age she should not even be forced to DEAL with this complex topic and all the emotions that come with it. At 19 I remember being super emotional about goofy teenage dating! The will-we-or-won't-we of whether things were going to finally work out with that guy you liked, finding your niche and making friends in college, trying to figure out who you'd be as an adult... That's what I remember about being that age.

And plus, a miscarriage is a lot to deal with for a lot of people even if they aren't super religious-- but their cult has a ton of harmful messages about God doing certain things to reward or punish people, she has so much pressure on her to have not just a baby, but lots of babies for God, AND she's around multiple pregnant sisters-in-law all the time. She's young with likely a lot of fertile years left and yet I feel like the Quiverfull expectations make her feel like she is somehow already running out of time or running "behind."

[Smee]

It does also make me wonder a bit, because it’s been months since the miscarriage and the speculation that started up again is obviously unfounded so far. I was in the “JinJer were preventing for the first year” camp for ages but now I wonder if their comments about kids “in the future” (and even now about wanting to see Felicity grow a bit rather than plans for #2) were to protect themselves from having to tell people about any fertility concerns if it didn’t happen immediately 

I met my husband when I was 19 and married him when I was 21, so I don’t really buy into the “late teens/early 20s are about partying, going on lots of dates and figuring yourself out as an adult” line of thinking, but I do feel for Lauren going through so much so young. She doesn’t have the experience and maturity that many girls her age do, and her support network is hardly varied. It’s hard for anyone to long and pray for something, work towards it, and simply not have it, no explanation for why everyone around but you seems to be in the situation you hoped to be in yourself. And I think it’s safe to say they’re trying. Her due date/the birth of Threewald will be even more painful for her if she’s not pregnant by then.

I kind of hope that Abby isn’t pregnant soon (& doesn’t want to be - I can see JD enjoying her company without wanting to tick off “the next thing”), because having just one other married woman to hang around with whose life isn’t all babies and pregnancy could be really helpful for Lauren.

[SassyPants]

Sadly, Lauren and Michaela are experiencing and will continue to deal with the consequences of “leaving it all up to God and letting God decide the number of children you have”, because out here in the non-cult, real world, sometimes couples are dealt the number zero. So, since these folks claim that their way, approach, values, beliefs...are superior to us common folks living in the real world, why don’t they tell and show us how they support and encourage women (couples) within their fold  for whom HE (their he) has decided to give zero blessings?  Personally, I think these ladies (and their spouses) get very, very limited support beyond being told to “keep sweet.”

[Sullie06]

I feel for Lauren and I love the Si seems to be really supportive of what she's going through. My first pregnancy ended in miscarriage and it took me another 2.5 years to get pregnant again. I could not imagine having to go through all that in the public eye. 

[Bad Wolf]

My DIL miscarried her first pregnancy. I always said that if she was told to stand on her head and eat raw liver to keep the baby she would have done it. Sometimes, however hard you try to do things right, shit happens.