Bro Gary Hawkins 8: F is for Felony and No Longer Funny

[FullOfGravy]

17 minutes ago, FeministShrew said:

I bet Bro Gary thinks King James received the KJV on the wings of doves floating down from heaven.

I would honestly bet he's never even thought about it.  The KJV just exists as part of his world, praise the LORD haymayun, and he's not thoughtful enough or curious enough to wonder how it got here.  It came from God, just like the sky and the weather and 'Merica and weens. 

Telling him that Jesus wasn't white and didn't speak English would probably trigger a full-on systems crash.  It simply would not compute.

[Lisafer]

For Bro Gary, a man who claims to be a Christian pastor, to openly admit that he has no interest in the original languages of his Holy Book...wow. How asinine. 

[Alisamer]

14 minutes ago, FullOfGravy said:

Telling him that Jesus wasn't white and didn't speak English would probably trigger a full-on systems crash.  It simply would not compute.

That'd be a fun video to see. Although, really, I'm kind of surprised he considers the KJV to be English. If he'd been brought up with another translation I could see him calling the KJV "some kinda furren words". 

Can we also point out that King James himself was almost certainly bisexual? And that part of the deal about having the translation done was that the church would overlook his liaisons with his male courtiers?

[Lisafer]

5 minutes ago, Alisamer said:

 

Can we also point out that King James himself was almost certainly bisexual? And that part of the deal about having the translation done was that the church would overlook his liaisons with his male courtiers?

Lies from Satan! HAYMAYUN HALLEYLOOYER ?

[Black Aliss]

1 hour ago, Spinosaurus said:

Come to think of it, is Yiddish the official language of the State of Israel?  Isn't that Hebrew?

Yes. Hebrew is the official language of Israel. Yiddish is a combination of German, Hebrew, Aramaic, with a handful of Slavic and other languages and is the official language of certain ethnic enclaves in New York City.

[thoughtful]

So, let's see what we've got here:

1. One guy claiming that Yiddish is the official language of Israel (excuse me, "Isreal").

2. The other answering that all he needs is the KJV because God gave us an English Bible.

3. Each of them dissing the other for not being knowledgeable.

It's like listening to the mating call of animals, except it's the bloviating call of self-inflated idiots.

[Black Aliss]

2 hours ago, thoughtful said:

So, let's see what we've got here:

1. One guy claiming that Yiddish is the official language of Israel (excuse me, "Isreal").

2. The other answering that all he needs is the KJV because God gave us an English Bible.

3. Each of them dissing the other for not being knowledgeable.

It's like listening to the mating call of animals, except it's the bloviating call of self-inflated idiots.

33 replies and counting since the original Yeshua hamashiach comment. It's more like the bugling male elk during the fall rutting period. They have locked antlers now and are going at it until one gives up or they  die.

[Yogi]

It is really worth going and reading that thread for yourself but here is a taste. You have Jim posting a fake Socrates quote and Gary giving us a word salad. 

 

 

[Alisamer]

What an amazing battle of wits. The entire universe is now dumber for having this even exist.

[AliceInFundyland]

How does he do that?

This is why we are in a strange place with him. 

We are know he did something probably pretty awful. And based on what most of us know to be true about similar situations we feel that the likelihood of his turning over a new leaf and becoming some sort of awesome saintly dude are low. Really, really low.

So it’s hard to snark on him like we started out.

But he remains completely fucking ludicrous. So we still laugh.

This isn’t judging. Just observing. 

[Dandruff]

On 10/24/2018 at 4:06 PM, Alisamer said:

Although, really, I'm kind of surprised he considers the KJV to be English.

I'm not.  I'm sitting here with a sweater on and would still guess that my room temperature is higher than his IQ.

[FullOfGravy]

I was almost - almost - going to give him the benefit of the doubt and suggest that word salad up there is what happens when voice-to-text has trouble with Gary's mumbling and thick accent, but there's that everyrine.  So he must have either typed or accepted the predictive text for all of that, and decided that yep, that there's a good English post, haymayun.

 

1 hour ago, Dandruff said:

I'm not.  I'm sitting here with a sweater on and would still guess that my room temperature is higher than his IQ.

The temperature in Celsius, no less!

[Granwych]

6 hours ago, Dandruff said:

I'm not.  I'm sitting here with a sweater on and would still guess that my room temperature is higher than his IQ.

Shoot, my dog's IQ is higher than Bro Gary's, and the dog doesn't even talk.

Just now, Granwych said:

Shoot, my dog's IQ is higher than Bro Gary's, and the dog doesn't even talk.

Upon listening to Bro deliver a sermon, I noticed that whenever he really got going, he'd add a "hah" to the end of a sentence.  Only when he was on a "yelling roll," not while speaking in a normal tone.  Kinda strange, but this is Bro Gary we're talking about.

 

[Dandruff]

3 hours ago, Granwych said:

Upon listening to Bro deliver a sermon, I noticed that whenever he really got going, he'd add a "hah" to the end of a sentence.  Only when he was on a "yelling roll," not while speaking in a normal tone.  Kinda strange, but this is Bro Gary we're talking about.

Perhaps to emphasize the brilliant point he just made?

[PumaLover]

Oh Gary, you never fail to entertain. I stayed up late last night reading that Facebook exchange. I was amused.

[thoughtful]

5 hours ago, Granwych said:

Upon listening to Bro deliver a sermon, I noticed that whenever he really got going, he'd add a "hah" to the end of a sentence.

I think his daddy taught him preachin' while they were working with a lazy mule attached to a mill, and Gary thought "HAW!" and "HA!" were necessary parts of the homily.

 

[Black Aliss]

11 hours ago, Granwych said:

Shoot, my dog's IQ is higher than Bro Gary's, and the dog doesn't even talk.

A perfect example of "it's better to remain silent [or just bark] and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt"

[OwlEyes]

Is it just me or did the Bro just lock down his Facebook? I can't see anything anymore!

[griffin]

I could see it earlier today, but now there is just the photo of him and Ofgary from Oct. 5. I'm going to be severely bummed if I can't get my Bro fix every day.

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

Didn’t he do this once before?  We should have put Bro in private members only forum because him or Becky read here.

[Spinosaurus]

8 hours ago, OwlEyes said:

Is it just me or did the Bro just lock down his Facebook? I can't see anything anymore!

Nooooo!  I need updates from a dim, racist molester!  I need weens in pink gravy!!

... Actually I don't need weens in pink gravy because it looks like sick.  But weens or no weens, come back, Bro!  We need you!

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

OK folks, it looks like Bro scrubbed his account and is starting fresh.  Bro’s Facebook account has been borned again!!!  HAYMAYUN!!!!

[Spinosaurus]

Is it a child of KING?

[EyesOpen]

Well damn. I guess he didn’t like any sort of ‘intelligent’ and I use that word lightly... discussion on theology, doctrine or Biblical knowledge. What a grotesque, angry, useless and uneducated turd he is. Based on how many Tumpers I know and see in my day to day apparently he’s in shitty ass but numerous company. Please for all that is in you please vote. We are fucked if this type of uneducated idiot is influencing decision. Please vote. Vote vote vote. Ok. I feel better... no wait. Vote.

[Black Aliss]

On 10/26/2018 at 8:05 PM, OwlEyes said:

Is it just me or did the Bro just lock down his Facebook? I can't see anything anymore!

Oh, dear. I hope it wasn't something I said! I will miss his argle-bargle.