Josiah and Lauren Part 11: The Baby Watch Continues

[VeryNikeSeamstress]

Re: AA. I have an atheist friend who struggles with addiction (it was alcolism for year, now it's overeating and compulsive shopping). She's tried the AA model, and all the 'God' stuff rubbed her the wrong way (she is very staunch atheist and while she respects other people's beliefs in higher powers, she literally doesn't believe in one). She's been sober for a couple of years now and is doing well, I know she initially took some medication to help her with alcohol cravings, and has found a new hobby. She's had the odd drink a couple of times in the past year but it has remained as a *very* occasional indulgence. Whenever I catch her shopping online I find myself asking her if she really needs the stuff she's buying,

[KelseyAnn]

10 hours ago, VeryNikeSeamstress said:

Re: AA. I have an atheist friend who struggles with addiction (it was alcolism for year, now it's overeating and compulsive shopping). She's tried the AA model, and all the 'God' stuff rubbed her the wrong way (she is very staunch atheist and while she respects other people's beliefs in higher powers, she literally doesn't believe in one). She's been sober for a couple of years now and is doing well, I know she initially took some medication to help her with alcohol cravings, and has found a new hobby. She's had the odd drink a couple of times in the past year but it has remained as a *very* occasional indulgence. Whenever I catch her shopping online I find myself asking her if she really needs the stuff she's buying,

I think a lot of people just don't understand how hard it is to give up an addiction and not replace it with anything else. 

I mean, ffs, when I stopped doing drugs I started spending $100 dollars a week on coffee just to have something to do during the times I would usually get high. 

[VeryNikeSeamstress]

^^So true.

I've been meaning to read In The Realm of the Hungry Ghosts by Gabor Mate. From what I hear it's a really good book about addiction.

[Daisy0322]

3 hours ago, KelseyAnn said:

I think a lot of people just don't understand how hard it is to give up an addiction and not replace it with anything else. 

I mean, ffs, when I stopped doing drugs I started spending $100 dollars a week on coffee just to have something to do during the times I would usually get high. 

A lot of people I know always went to meetings instead so they'd end up at 2,3,4 meetings a day. Whatever works I guess. 

[SassyPants]

3 hours ago, KelseyAnn said:

I think a lot of people just don't understand how hard it is to give up an addiction and not replace it with anything else. 

I mean, ffs, when I stopped doing drugs I started spending $100 dollars a week on coffee just to have something to do during the times I would usually get high. 

Yep...my BIL went from alcohol to drugs to overeating, then coffee, exercise and finally religion.

[libgirl2]

3 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

Yep...my BIL went from alcohol to drugs to overeating, then coffee, exercise and finally religion.

My friend's husband went from alcohol to God. 

[feministxtian]

30 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

My friend's husband went from alcohol to God. 

My husband definitely got more spiritual or religious after he quit drinking. It wasn't AA that did it, it was waking up in a jail cell with no memory of how he got there or the day he'd spent in the hospital sobering up. He swore that he'd be more faithful in the future if only God would let him stay married to me. He hasn't fallen off the wagon at all. BUT...he's not a full-on nutcase fundamentalist either. Just more "aware" I guess? 

[libgirl2]

37 minutes ago, feministxtian said:

My husband definitely got more spiritual or religious after he quit drinking. It wasn't AA that did it, it was waking up in a jail cell with no memory of how he got there or the day he'd spent in the hospital sobering up. He swore that he'd be more faithful in the future if only God would let him stay married to me. He hasn't fallen off the wagon at all. BUT...he's not a full-on nutcase fundamentalist either. Just more "aware" I guess? 

That is just fine. My friend's husband traded one addiction for another. He witnessed at his daughter's HS graduation pool party. She was mortified, so was the crowd. 

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

GOD in AA can be interpreted as Good Orderly Direction.  Just saying.  Personally I required therapy to get to the root cause and it turned out for the most part to be my ex and fundamentalism.   I sometimes wish I could have just shot the bastard.  I’m all good now though.  William Glasser’s Reality Therapy worked well for me. Big hugs to anyone struggling.

[metheglyn]

This showed up on their Insta today. Not sure what I think about Josiah's eyes and smile (?) in this pic. Is he expressing genuine happiness or "Ahhhhhh"? I'd like them to be happy with their lives and choices (as long as they're not being obnoxious about it and damaging to others), but this pic is unsettling somehow.

 

[SapphireSlytherin]

This picture does nothing to ring alarm bells to me. They look like a typical young couple in this one. This is the FIRST one they've looked "normal" in (to me). Even if she IS wearing a shirt with her old monogram on it...

[Daisy0322]

That's an age appropriate picture if you ask me I think it's cute... for the duggars anyway. It's the most comfortable I've seen them look. Si just looks like he's been holding the smoke for the picture for a couple takes. 

[Markie]

Si has lovely eyes in that photo. I think it’s a cute pic.

[Sky with diamonds]

I like that pic. This is the most "real'  have seen them. 

[Shadoewolf]

Hubby went from alcohol to pain pills to coke, back to alcohol, benzos then back to alcohol to Adderall. He's doing well now, sober for a good stretch but that always makes me edgy because a relapse is usually on the horizon. He's on a good combo of Sam-E and CBD oil but I know he struggles. We have no religious background to really lay hard on, though we study lots of Pagan traditions. I refuse to enable him though, I crack down when he slips and I don't allow for excuses. After being unaccountable and coddled his whole life, it's what he needs. He won't go to meetings and that's ok. His recovery. His choice.

ETA: when he's really stressing or on the verge, he hits coffee and sugar hard. I kinda giggled one night when he told me was going "angrily eat Oreos" then did. But at least he kept control!!

[Pecansforeveryone]

I know most treatment centers wether for eating disorders or substance abuse do allow patients who are smokers to have smoke breaks. It's to much to ask them to give it up all at once though methods of quitting are presented and encouraged post treatment. 

[metheglyn]

4 hours ago, Daisy0322 said:

That's an age appropriate picture if you ask me I think it's cute... for the duggars anyway. It's the most comfortable I've seen them look. Si just looks like he's been holding the smoke for the picture for a couple takes. 

I think it's a cute pic, something about it just reads a touch weird to me. If it's related to trying to hold an expression to get the right pic I could see that.

[Jinder Roles]

45 minutes ago, metheglyn said:

I think it's a cute pic, something about it just reads a touch weird to me. If it's related to trying to hold an expression to get the right pic I could see that.

I think it seems weird to you because usually in these cheek kiss pictures, the person being kissed isn’t looking at the camera (usually eyes closed or mid-laugh etc) 

 Josiah is smiling directly at us, bright eyed. Which is fine, but it makes it look more posed than candid. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

The only thing about this photo compared to one of JinJer is:  if this had been JinJer, our reaction would have been:  Jinger loves Jeremy; Jeremy loves the camera.

[LilMissMetaphor]

Let's stop analyzing people's eyes and percentage of body fat.

I beg of you.

[ihaveanexamintwodays]

On 9/25/2018 at 4:34 PM, metheglyn said:

This showed up on their Insta today. Not sure what I think about Josiah's eyes and smile (?) in this pic. Is he expressing genuine happiness or "Ahhhhhh"? I'd like them to be happy with their lives and choices (as long as they're not being obnoxious about it and damaging to others), but this pic is unsettling somehow.

 

This is one of the most genuine pictures we've seen from them, I think. But compare that to the little clips and pics we've of, say, John & Abbie.....and the difference is so, so, so stark. 

[QuiverFullofBooks]

I finally watched the wedding episode. Thoughts:

- Lauren is WAY too into her dad. Mentioning they’re close once or twice would have been plenty. Meanwhile, the only thing she said about her mom was that she’s supportive of her dad.

- Her hair needs conditioner desperately and maybe a trim. It really detracted from what was overall a fabulous look. Oddly, I don’t notice it in other scenes with her. 

- Jessa said it was her favorite wedding, and I agreed. No snark at all. I’m sure that was because the Swansons did much of the planning and paid much of the cost.

- Unlike @Buzzard, I liked her rehearsal dress. Simple, classic, and elegant. 

- Michelle looked much thinner and less busty in the tea party scene than at the wedding. I suppose it was just a more flattering dress and maybe a better bra, but it made me suspicious about the timeline of the tea party. There were no guests other than the Duggars, were there? In real life she would have invited more girlfriends and fewer brothers-in-law. It’s sad that Anna and Jill didn’t get to go.

- They really made a big deal of Josiah’s past wedding pranks. What has he done for each wedding? I wonder if he’s done pranks for extended family and friends that haven’t made the show? Are his siblings so shocked by any form of misbehavior that they’re making it into a bigger deal than it is?

- The brother who stowed away in their car should have said, “I’m your honeymoon chaperone!”

[viii]

So I know that Anna and Jill attend family stuff, so how does that work with filming? How awkward for the crew to be like, 'and now a photo.... jill and anna, if you guys can just duck out of the way please...'

[eveandadam]

Random and superficial (sorry) thoughts about the wedding episode:

- Jana is becoming more and more beautiful

- Michelle looked beautiful

- A lot of people looked beautiful, including the howler monkeys, man, they have grown up, Jeremiah might become the most handsome Duggar boy/man yet (we'll see about the rest). He is 19 now, the fundie girls will be crazy about him for sure... From the way Justin dresses I thought he might be in full teenage rebel mode.

- Josiah seemed happy to be with Lauren but super nervous because of the wedding itself. I do think they are a good match and I hope they are waiting to have their first child and do not rush Lauren into teenage motherhood.

- the tea party was awesome, more of that please! This reminded me of the tea party the Wilson family gave in their documentary "virgin tales". so is this a fundie thing or an american thing?

- jane austen references? I knew fundies would come around to jane austen as they pretty much live by the same rules, except fundies tend to show less cleavage lol.

- another tea party thought: why is lily presented so much on the show all of a suddon? courtship? what about lauren caldwell?

[FleeJanaFree]

6 hours ago, eveandadam said:

austen references? I knew fundies would come around to jane austen as they pretty much live by the same rules

 I mean, mr.rochester dressed in drag, to trick Jane into revealing her feelings about him by  cruelly telling her he was engaged, And hid his wife in an attic, and had no intention of telling his new romantic interest until they were 'married' a year (polygamy/ stealing her virginity and saved til marriage status under false pretenses), and wasn't too concerned his ward was probably his actual daughter.

jane Austen is far too metal for this crowd.