Counting on Season 4 - Part 5 - Volunteering or Profiteering

[Augustus]

Who else is thinking about Lucille from Arrested Development being unable to spare the moisture? 

[punkiepie]

11 minutes ago, AtlanticTug said:

It's such a sharp contrast to see the Caldwell parents interact with Kendra in such a genuine way. You really get the sense they love her and understand her as more than just one of a zillion kids. She seems to have a nice relationship with them and the emotions they were all showing were so real as compared to Emotional Zombie Michelle and Jim Bob (aside from Jill's wedding).

I adopted my dog when she was between one and two years old. She came from an abusive home, but she was the the sweetest, loving, and most gentle dog ever; but she didn’t know how to play- in fact, she never figured it out. From time to time she would watch another dog play with a toy and then she would run around with it, shaking her head and trying to do what the other dogs were doing. After about 30 seconds of this, she would come back to me, drop the toy and give me this look like, “how is this fun? Can you please just scratch my belly now.”  And that’s what Michelle reminds me of, and to an extent Jboob- attempting to mimic the right moves, but never actually experiencing the corresponding emotion. 

[Carm_88]

Apologies in advance if I miss something because I can feel myself zoning out. This just isn’t holding my attention tonight. I keep thinking “I’ve seen this before.” There may be pieces like Josie and Jordyn decorating cakes that I didn’t, but mostly, yeah. Been here, saw this. I just pulled out a handful of all pink mini eggs, my food baby shall be a girl! Yayyyy!

Joe is being led to the staircase by Laura and now the photographer is setting him up, for the first look of course. Kendra is just one big ruffle coming down the stairs. With flowers. “Hey Joe.” He looks so genuinely excited when he sees her. “You’re so beautiful.” Awww. He’s a nice guy. Kendra just really wanted to show him her dress. She loves his outfit and he smells good too. Well that’s a good thing. “I missed you. My princess.” It was more beautiful then Joe thought it would be. He didn’t know that you could put so much sparkle on a weding dress. You haven’t watched say yes to the dress. They are really enjoying talking to each other here. They balance each other well. It’s amazing. To take a word from Jinger. They’re going to do pictures.

What advice do you have for Joe and Kendra as newlyweds.

Ben “The more you get to know a person, the more you realize, they’re an imperfect human like me. “ Hardest thing you will ever do but the most rewarding.”  Says Jessa

“Enjoy the first few months. You don’t want to get comfortable with each other.” Joy

“You miss the little things in your engagement.” Austin

“Spend time together as a couple. Takea all the joys in.” Jinger

Kendra doesn’t like the thought of Joe having to leave her because she gets stressed. Michelle is very excited about Joe getting married, seems like a long time since they had a son get married. Yeah it was 9 years. Jim Bob is talking. I am not listening. He wanted to marry someone like his Mom, Joe did. I am not sure about that. I hope that Kendra doesn’t check out after a bunch of kids. Michelle’s advice is not to go to bed angry. I am not so certain about that one. Sometimes things can be better if you go to bed angry because you make wake up with a clearer head. Because you’re fueling your own anger. I’m not even listening. God I dislike Jim Bob and Michelle. “Sweet godly girl.” Fuck you Jim Bob. I hate your face right now.

The dress fix. Ahhhh I remember this. Miz Renee’s Frankenstein monster creation did not hold up well. Jana can help anyone because she brought her sewing machine. Jana to the rescue. Jana is so prepared. Jana expects the unexpected. She’s super seamstress says Jinger. It was just all coming off because Miz Rneee didn’t do shit. She was probably cooing on about “Theeee whoever.” The wedding is starting in like 10-15 mintues says Joy. Ahhh that makes me so nervous. Joe said that it was hard but he was waiting like a gentleman in the back room. Josiah is talking about using Joseph’s bed for a storage space. Joe says it’s prime location. Jessa did her kiss in private. Laura booed her because that’s not cool. Everyone can see lots of kisses says Jessa just not the first one. You do you. I was going to ask if Derick dip kissed but I remember that he got the Josh treatment.

And they’re off! Wedding time. Lauren is helping Kendra with her dress.

-Various duggars walking down the aisle

Lauren and Kendra are hugging tightly before Lauren walks down the aisle. It’s sweet how close they seem to.

Pastor Caldwell helps Kendra with her veil before the wedding march starts playing enthusiastically. Is it Erin Paine?

Johanna looks so grown up. As do most of the littler Duggars.

[Carm_88]

I told you I was zoning out! 12:03 is too late for the Duggars and me!

More wedding marching. Joe is going to cry when he sees Kendra. Oh yes I Called it. Maybe becase I have seen it before. That lower lip quiver. Yes Joe, you did lose it. That’s ok though. He’s not a crier though, not at all. It was a big deal for him to cry. Um Joe, pretty sure you cried when you were talking about the Turd. Who is now in your wedding. Kendra realized that he was bawling and she was totally shocked. It started making her emotional, it makes her emotional when other people are crying. Yes, you’ve said that.

Who gives this woman to e married to this man? Her mother and I do. “Give me a kiss.” “Not yet.” I am not sure she ever gets this kiss. Kendra is a precious gift and he ran some numbers. He figured that nearly $850,000 would cover all the food and joy. They have been praying for this day since she was born. There are many good things about Kendra. He is still her father right now, he will be the pastor in a minute. His wife, him, and the lord have worked very hard to get her there, don’t mess it up. In all seriousness, he wouldn’t give her away to just anyone. They did their part and now it’s Joe’s time to do his part. Blah blah and the lord, and all that as well. I Cut that part out. Lauren is bawling. He hopes that the bright ray of sunshine lightens her new home as she goes with Joe. He hugged her, but she didn’t get that kiss. She loves her Daddy.

They walk up the steps. Pastor Caldwell cracking a few jokes helped Joe keep it together and he wasn’t crying the rest of the time at least. Marriage is an institution given by God to man. I cannot deal with all the God stuff. Do they understand it? Yes of course they do. “Keep yourself only true to her, as long as you both shall live.” “I will.” In other words, do not pull a Josh. Same for Kendra. Now they are going to do the stupid ring gag. Here he comes out of the ceiling. *yawn* Michelle is acting laughing and doesn’t have that phony laugh and grin. Joe expected something. This is Josiah of course he has some prank up his sleeve says Kendra. If it was a prank it has to be a real prank says Josiah. I am so done with this prank at weddings thing. It gets old. Jed thought it was cool as long as no one gets hurt. Josiah has friends in high places says Jeremiah. They are doing the vows. Blah blah blah. They are going to be married. They’ve been married since September now. I am done with this. Lots of weird camera angles to cut out Turd and Derick. The mother and father of the groom are going to pray over them. They’re doing the unity candle. And butterfly kisses is playing in the background. I love the song but come on. It’s a bit weird at this moment. Oh god Jim Bob. “You mean everything to me.” I don’t know which one said it. I think that it was Kendra. Now both sets of parents are praying but they’re not going to let us hear that. Joe didn’t take his wedding vows likely “Take that Josh!”

Pastor Caldwell is now dragging out the whole prounucing them husband and wife thing. And roses fall out of the ceiling and they kiss.  

[3SecondSideHugger]

Ohh Gawd Joe really just compared kissing his wife on the lips to kissing a baby’s forehead wtf 

[2manyKidzzz]

Looks like they had REAL FOOD. Guess the Caldwells saw to that doncha think.

[Carm_88]

Here comes the kiss and rose petals and of course the kiss. Kendra loves him and he loves her and the kiss was the best ever. When he kissed Kendra, it was everything he ever hoped and more. Do we need a slow mo TLC? Kissing a baby’s forehead is different then kissing someone on the lips. It made it so much greater because they waited. It was a really special moment for Kendra. Seriously TLC fuck off with the slow mo.

Why is the power out? Joe thought that it was part of it because of all the candles. Kendra thought that it was a prank. Everyone started looking at Josiah and he said it wasn’t him. And out they run in the dark. People thought that it was a part of the ceremony. Then they realized the pastor’s mic was out. It was strange and really weird says Josiah. The kiss was so great the lights went out. That’s what Kendra and Joe are giggling about. Jessa said that it was gorgeous. They all ran out. It ended up being a neat effect. “I guess the kiss like knocked the power out.” Says Joe. “Yeah it blew everything away said Kendra.” Jana said that all the power went out in the city, so they are trying to light everything with candles and tea lights. Some places still have power for some reason. They’re putting out candles for a little more light, it looks more romantic.

All the food was cooked and all the food was set out. So it doesn’t really matter. Then the power came back on. No proposals this time. Josiah introduces them as Mr and Mrs. Joseph Garrett Duggar. Joseph loves the sound of Mr. and Mrs. Joseph Duggar. He wants to thank all the people who came and all the people who meant so much to him.

Cake feeding. Kendra made an awful mess of him and Pastor Caldwell says that’s my girl. Kendra doesn’t remember the cake but Joe said he did. Her Mom sys that she was proud of her fro smearing the cake on his face. She encouraged her to do that. Kendra loves messing Joe. “It’s my only surprise left for you.” Ohhhh really?

Joe Jr will be coming along says Josiah.

Don’t get yourself too busy the first year. Take it easy, get to know each other, spend time together. Says John David.  

Sometimes the power is going to go out but you’re going have to stick together and go through it. There will be hard times but stick to each other and trust in the lord and you will get through it. -Josiah

Your worlds are going to change. You’re not longer a single person. Focus on each other and this season of life. –Jeremy

Austin says he sees children in their future. No one would guess that. /sarcasm. It’s exciting to be young couples with them, to grow up together, and raise kids together.

Jessa talks about allt he excting things. JinJers wedding, Henry was born, Joy and Austin’s wedding, Joe’s proposal, and now their wedding. Note that she skipped Sam and Mason’s births.

Joy says that there are more weddings to come. A lot to come fos rue.

They already lost track of how many kisses it has beem. They’re getting close to hundred, it will soon be 101. They’re giving out sparklers. It’s an amazing feeling to be married. It’s a big responsibility but he has an amazing bride.

They are walking out of the reception and onto their honeymoon. First kiss was amazing but so was 102 says Kendra. Sparklers are quite pretty. More kissing. They really can’t get their hands off each other. Oh young love.

They’re excited to go on their honeymoon and go see what kind of adventurous things that they can do in Greece. Kendra wouldn’t change anything about their wedding day. It was so special and it meant so much to them.

And that’s it. Good night!

[VineHeart137]

Thanks bunches @Carm_88. My eyes started glazing over just reading your recap (Not because of you, because we've literally seen all of this already) so I can't really fathom how you managed to actually watch it all. Bravo!

[Nargus]

7 minutes ago, Carm_88 said:

Don’t get yourself too busy the first year. Take it easy, get to know each other, spend time together. Says John David.  

JD sounds like a smart young man.  I hope he gave that advice to all his recently married siblings. Even if only Jinger and Jeremy seemed to listen.

[2manyKidzzz]

Thank you Carm!! You are so strong!!

[Carm_88]

4 minutes ago, VineHeart137 said:

Thanks bunches @Carm_88. My eyes started glazing over just reading your recap (Not because of you, because we've literally seen all of this already) so I can't really fathom how you managed to actually watch it all. Bravo!

I was so bored. They just cut some more scenes into the actual wedding and showed a little more before and after. Literally just cut and pasted like a Miz Renee original. 

[ChickenettiLuvr]

Muchas gracias for the recap, @Carm_88. If I'd known how boring this would be, I would have drone-dropped you some No Doze + espresso. 

[SamuraiKatz]

she is all of 19 she needs to stop acting like she's oh so old and has been waiting for ever for her "prince charming" 
as for having the little kids stay away for a year that just makes me rage those poor kids are already restricted enough without having to be restricted even more because brother dearest just has to marry without being able to probably care for a wife and family. 

I think having the kids wait for an invitation is a healthy boundary. I am happy that she and Joe can feel like they can do ghst.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

We cut the cord and don't have cable/satellite anymore so I didn't get to see tonight's episode and @Carm_88 the way you described it, it is almost as if I had seen it with my own two eyes. 

[Ivycoveredtower]

7 minutes ago, SamuraiKatz said:

2 hours ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

she is all of 19 she needs to stop acting like she's oh so old and has been waiting for ever for her "prince charming" 
as for having the little kids stay away for a year that just makes me rage those poor kids are already restricted enough without having to be restricted even more because brother dearest just has to marry without being able to probably care for a wife and family. 

I think having the kids wait for an invitation is a healthy boundary. I am happy that she and Joe can feel like they can do ghst. 

If it was not on the property I would agree. but since it's still in the compound I don't think it's right to restrict those kids even more on where they can and can't go. If they wanted privacy and not to be invaded then they should have saved money and rented/bought their own house. 

[Carm_88]

5 minutes ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

If it was not on the property I would agree. but since it's still in the compound I don't think it's right to restrict those kids even more on where they can and can't go. If they wanted privacy and not to be invaded then they should have saved money and rented/bought their own house. 

They have enough room to move around. They know that Joe and Kendra are living in this certain place, they don't need to go there. They're all old enough to know better. 

[nst]

Thanks Carm for the recap 

 

[SamuraiKatz]

They have enough room to move around. They know that Joe and Kendra are living in this certain place, they don't need to go there. They're all old enough to know better. 

The compound sits on 20 acres.

[Sky with diamonds]

Great recaps, @Carm_88

[Kelsey]

Michelle says "I'm very excited that Joseph is getting married" while looking less excited than I do when my dog finally stops spinning in circles and takes a dump.

[JillRodsEyeliner]

4 hours ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

We cut the cord and don't have cable/satellite anymore so I didn't get to see tonight's episode and @Carm_88 the way you described it, it is almost as if I had seen it with my own two eyes. 

It's about as exciting as watching paint dry. Why do people still find this family fascinating? They get married and have a baby! So exciting. 

[Rachel333]

7 hours ago, Augustus said:

Who else is thinking about Lucille from Arrested Development being unable to spare the moisture? 

My first thought as well. 

 

[SapphireSlytherin]

Thanks, @Carm_88 - I felt like I was right there watching with you. lol

What a boring fucking show. HOW is it still on?

[Pandora Spocks]

After watching this episode, I see what a failure I am as a parent. I have never once prayed for my children's future spouses. Now I fear they will never marry and give me eleventy bajillion grandchildren! How can I ever atone? 

[Eternalbluepearl]

Thank you so much @Carm_88! I'm kind of confused. Did they actually show Kendra and Joe's wedding again? Will we be seeing Joy and Austin's again too? Is it all just recapping weddings from here to eternity, TLC?