Dillards 30 - Lawsuit Tweets and Leaving Danger America

[Daisy0322]

We didn't really "announce" our sons name. We just started using it, once we picked it out, when we talk about him because it is his name and seemed like the natural thing to do for us. I wouldn't really think twice if someone wanted to keep it a secret or make a big announcement. Seems like some people just like rules more than others.

[Cleopatra7]

1 hour ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

It seems that Derick's time in college is something the Dillards talk about frequently as a family, even visiting his old dorm on Counting On and whatnot. We see Israel in OSU shirts often in pictures and that freaky-looking mascot Pistol Pete is mentioned and showed constantly. All of this OSU culture worship is going to be weird if Jill and Derick's kids then aren't allowed to go to college. 

We've seen the Duggars wear Razorback gear and go to University of Arkansas games, even though no J'kid would ever be permitted to go there as a student. The late, lamented Stuff Fundies Like discussed this tendency to support football teams of schools whose actual educational mission are condemned as evil and unchristian. Since there aren't too many major sports franchises in rural areas, college sports are used to fill the void.

[bal maiden]

The Pistol Pete head gives me the fucking creeps. 

[frugalitymom]

I think the difference with Derick is that he went to college and was the mascot like his dad.  I foresee him wanting the same for his sons.  Now I know plenty of homeschooled kids who gone on to college without any problems.  If Derick takes an active role in the kids schooling then they might get a great homeschool education if not then it might be questionable since the homeschool education Jill got is questionable especially not knowing how she was taught or what she was taught.

[breakfree]

I flat out don't think Jill is remotely capable of preparing any child for a normal 4-year university. I also don't think Derrick is going to help home school them at all. Derrick is very comfortable doing nothing whatsoever, he's gonna continue on with that either for the rest of his life or until no more money is coming in from TLC and grifting and he has no choice whatsoever but to do something for money to support his kids. Even then though he might just take them all to Africa and lead some missionary life in a hut that he steals there rather than do an honest day's work.

[PennySycamore]

When I first saw all the orange shirts,  I thought for a second that it might be one of the events last weekend sponsored by Every town for Gun Safety where we were all supposed to be in orange, but no, it was the Dullards.  No way would they have been at a rally protesting the epidemic of gun violence.

[Eternalbluepearl]

50 minutes ago, breakfree said:

I flat out don't think Jill is remotely capable of preparing any child for a normal 4-year university. I also don't think Derrick is going to help home school them at all. Derrick is very comfortable doing nothing whatsoever, he's gonna continue on with that either for the rest of his life or until no more money is coming in from TLC and grifting and he has no choice whatsoever but to do something for money to support his kids. Even then though he might just take them all to Africa and lead some missionary life in a hut that he steals there rather than do an honest day's work.

I agree with you here but Derick didn't seem this way when we were first introduced to him. Derick was raised by a father who had a job (I have no clue if his mom worked) and went to college expecting to have a job as a young adult and then did work for a short time. Then it was free mansions, holy first-born-sons, and please pray for us while we attempt to learn spanish. It's hard to know if Derick always had a grifter's heart or if Jill's reality fame changed him. Although I don't think Derick picking millionaire Jim Bob Duggar to be his "prayer partner" while he was in Nepal was an accident. Hmm. Derick's descent into doing nothing remains a mystery to me. 

[mpheels]

5 minutes ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

I agree with you here but Derick didn't seem this way when we were first introduced to him. Derick was raised by a father who had a job (I have no clue if his mom worked) and went to college expecting to have a job as a young adult and then did work for a short time. Then it was free mansions, holy first-born-sons, and please pray for us while we attempt to learn spanish. It's hard to know if Derick always had a grifter's heart or if Jill's reality fame changed him. Although I don't think Derick picking millionaire Jim Bob Duggar to be his "prayer partner" while he was in Nepal was an accident. Hmm. Derick's descent into doing nothing remains a mystery to me. 

I can't remember is Cathy Dillard worked, but she also went to college. Derrick's parents were both students at OSU when they met.

[Jugs MacGee-Duggar]

On ‎01‎/‎06‎/‎2017 at 10:11 AM, Tatar-tot said:

 

Derrick Dillard, in my book, is 2 degrees of separation from John Schrader.  I really don't want Jill to end up being Esther 2.0.  

I can't believe I am saying this; but, it is  too bad Jill did not marry David Waller.  David at least has his act together when it comes to taking care of Priscilla and their children.

Look, I'm not trying to pick a fight (terrible way to preface anything, I know) but the only thing Jill Dullard has in common with David Waller (outside of loving the lord of course) is their mutual appreciation of the male physique. Priscilla at least is too dim to notice.

[justmy2cents]

44 minutes ago, mpheels said:

I can't remember is Cathy Dillard worked, but she also went to college. Derrick's parents were both students at OSU when they met.

Cathy worked for Walmart. May still work there.

[HarleyQuinn]

Honestly, Dwreck probably feels entitled to one of his son's being Pistol Pete. If his kids can't get into that college, I could see him trying to organize a "one night only as a mascot" type thing because they're speshul snowflakes and what not. 

[Lurky]

I read really good advice in a column that if people reveal the name before the baby's born, they can open themselves up to a lot of criticism (& I know this is true, my mum was an arse re my sister's name pre-birth) but if you keep it secret, and then introduce the baby to the world as a real named person, people will coo over the baby/photos, and think it's great!

[justmy2cents]

The minute I told my friends and coworkers I was pregnant with a girl many of them asked if I knew what I was going to name her. I'd had the name for 20 years, my grandmother's name, but I didn't want to share for many of the reasons mentioned above. I was a little put out that so many people asked. I never asked anyone that question though there were definitely people who shared on their own.

[VelociRapture]

7 hours ago, Iamtheway said:

I always find it a little weird when people name their kids before they actually meet them. But then again they all do look pretty much the same when they arrive so if you want to name your kid a name that suit them you either have to wait until they are a few months old or name them Potato. 

We had our daughter's name picked for three years before her birth. She's named for me, my mom, my dad's favorite Aunt, and my mom's late (and only) sister. We loved her first name and her middle name individually - but the family connection made it even better.

Sometimes, you just know. And for us, having lost a pregnancy prior to having our daughter, saying her name out loud when we were alone together really did help us bond with the pregnancy as @VineHeart137said. It made us feel more hopeful that things would turn out differently that time.

[mpheels]

1 hour ago, justmy2cents said:

The minute I told my friends and coworkers I was pregnant with a girl many of them asked if I knew what I was going to name her. I'd had the name for 20 years, my grandmother's name, but I didn't want to share for many of the reasons mentioned above. I was a little put out that so many people asked. I never asked anyone that question though there were definitely people who shared on their own.

I had several friends get married in 2014 and have first babies in 2015 (we're all in our 30's, and they all lived with their SOs before marriage). My rule of thumb for both weddings and babies is to ask general how do you feel type questions, and never ask specifics about details, sex, names, etc... If my friends want to share, I support them and withhold my judgement.

[VineHeart137]

2 hours ago, Lurky said:

I read really good advice in a column that if people reveal the name before the baby's born, they can open themselves up to a lot of criticism (& I know this is true, my mum was an arse re my sister's name pre-birth) but if you keep it secret, and then introduce the baby to the world as a real named person, people will coo over the baby/photos, and think it's great!

I used to frequent a baby name forum and the regulars there always gave the same advice. Although their reasoning was that if you told people the name before baby is born they feel like they can change your mind. After baby is here and the birth certificate is signed people are more likely to keep their negative opinion to themselves since there isn't much anybody can do about it at that point.

[SapphireSlytherin]

6 minutes ago, VineHeart137 said:

After baby is here and the birth certificate is signed people are more likely to keep their negative opinion to themselves since there isn't much anybody can do about it at that point.

We went into the delivery room with only the middle name picked out for a girl, plus three possible first names.  When we saw her face, the third name option was immediately selected, because that's what she looked like. Nobody knew our potential names.

As for the negative opinion post-birth, I got a lot - because neither of her names is a "family" name. 

Did I mention we had no idea if we were having a boy or girl? US Army hospital wouldn't tell the sex of the baby to anyone. And also, military birth process:  Go to hospital, labor unmedicated, deliver unmedicated, walk to recovery room, walk to semi-private room, etc. 

[karen77]

3 hours ago, Lurky said:

I read really good advice in a column that if people reveal the name before the baby's born, they can open themselves up to a lot of criticism (& I know this is true, my mum was an arse re my sister's name pre-birth) but if you keep it secret, and then introduce the baby to the world as a real named person, people will coo over the baby/photos, and think it's great!

nah..  I still criticize my niece's name... maybe not to their faces (wouldn't have before hand either), but yeah, it's rough and she's almost 2)

[Chocolatedefrauded]

29 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

Did I mention we had no idea if we were having a boy or girl? US Army hospital wouldn't tell the sex of the baby to anyone. And also, military birth process:  Go to hospital, labor unmedicated, deliver unmedicated, walk to recovery room, walk to semi-private room, etc. 

Military wives/moms win the toughness award! I was asked, in mid-push, if I wanted to walk to the OR at a regular hospital, & said no way, give me that wheelchair!

we didn't find out our baby's gender before birth but my family knew my girl name since I was 15 when I picked it out. We had 2 versions of a boy name picked out. The trouble was a middle name for a girl. No one said anything negative about it, thank goodness, cause it was no one's business what we named our baby.

[nvmbr02]

4 hours ago, Lurky said:

I read really good advice in a column that if people reveal the name before the baby's born, they can open themselves up to a lot of criticism (& I know this is true, my mum was an arse re my sister's name pre-birth) but if you keep it secret, and then introduce the baby to the world as a real named person, people will coo over the baby/photos, and think it's great!

I think it is really hit or miss. We received criticism both ways. It is what it is. When my sister was naming her baby recently I warned her about certain family members and sure enough the same people had something to about her choices. 

1 hour ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

 

Did I mention we had no idea if we were having a boy or girl? US Army hospital wouldn't tell the sex of the baby to anyone. And also, military birth process:  Go to hospital, labor unmedicated, deliver unmedicated, walk to recovery room, walk to semi-private room, etc. 

Ugh, that wasn't my experience for the most part. 

With my first we did find out she was a girl ahead of time. I gave birth in a small overseas hospital. The labor and delivery room was the same and they pushed us on a gurney to the postpartum room., which was semi private. The only issue was there was only one bathroom in the hallway and I had to waddle down the hall with a towel between my legs just a few hours after birth so that I could shower. That was fun. There was also only one shower and the next day I had to wait forever to shower since there was a line. My roommate and I became friends though and still keep in touch. I do wish my husband would have been allowed to stay longer, they booted him out shortly after I was settled in since it was past visiting hours. I did have an epidural though and the staff was amazing.

With my second I had a private room and a bathroom. They had plenty of wheel chairs and gurneys to use as needed. I did have an unmedicated birth, but that was by choice.  We also didn't find the sex but that was because our little guy wouldn't cooperate.

My third baby was after we left the miltary but there really wasn't much difference in the way things were handled. We just had a hospital copay.

[SapphireSlytherin]

18 minutes ago, nvmbr02 said:

small overseas hospital.

My friend had her second son in a hospital off-post in Germany. She was in for a WEEK, treated like a queen! I was so jealous.

I think they do give epidurals now, but my experience was 25+ years ago. 

[nvmbr02]

1 minute ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

My friend had her second son in a hospital off-post in Germany. She was in for a WEEK, treated like a queen! I was so jealous.

I think they do give epidurals now, but my experience was 25+ years ago. 

Mine were 14 and 12 years ago, I know they have been doing epidurals for 18ish years at least, but I have no idea what was done before then. 

Most of my friends that gave birth in Germany did so off post, but at a birth center, so unmedicated and usually back home later that day, but again the was their choice. I had 3 days in the hospital with my first, but things were a bit complicated after her birth. The other two I went home 18-20 hours after. I wanted out as soon as possible. If I could have had a home birth safely that would have been my first choice, but unfortunately it isn't a safe option for me.

[NotQuiteMotY]

12 hours ago, Iamtheway said:

I always find it a little weird when people name their kids before they actually meet them. But then again they all do look pretty much the same when they arrive so if you want to name your kid a name that suit them you either have to wait until they are a few months old or name them Potato. 

For the most part, the people I know pick at least the first name but don't share it, though there are a few who announced the name the same time as the sex. Plus, having a handle helps! My husband and I decided not to find out what we were having, so we ended up referring to the baby as "Little T-or-J" because we had a name picked out for either possibility. Besides, it's easier to have a name ready to go by the time the kid comes out, at least for me.

All that said, I don't understand sharing the name early. Letting it be secret means that you can change your mind if the name ends up not suiting the baby once it arrives. Plus, as someone pointed out up-thread, people in general are more likely to swallow criticism when it's official than when it's still speculative.

[Daisy0322]

Haha I've had a few people tell me they didn't like the name we picked and I just told them that they didn't have to like it, we did. My mom being one of them . I've ordered a ton of stuff with our little guy's name on it though. I tend to think the person makes the name rather than the name makes the person. Plus I'm just a monogram/ embroidery person so it was important to me his name looked good in different fonts and his initials flowed well. 

[JordynDarby5]

I've had my kids names picked out since I was childhood for a boy and for two girls assuming they ever end up coming along.  But everyone hates them. I've had the boy's first and middle named picked out since I saw the Little Mermaid and fell in love with the name Sebastian. The middle name would be my great-grandfather's first name because he had a huge impact in my life. I've had two names picked out for two girls just as long one is my paternal grandmother's name I always thought it was so beautiful with my maternal grandmother's middle name for the middle name and I've always loved the name Anastasia which I'd pair with my great-grandmother's first name which is also my mother's first name. No matter how many years pass they are still my favorite names.