Seewalds 22 - Funerals and Embryo Cake

[MadeItOut]

42 minutes ago, Pasta said:

I was genuinely surprised by the writing and the sentiment.  I'm glad Jessa found a guy perfect for her.  They really seem to balance each other. 

...and to think at one point she had that coffee date with meechelle trying to work out why he was being affectionate to her. At least she seems happy on that front now.

[Nikedagain?]

1 hour ago, Italiangirl said:

Uff Now i'm preatty tired after read quikly this letter. I know they are plenty of time but it still amaze me how they (both) can find the time and the motivation(?) to write every time such a long letter and then publish on line 

YAAWWNNN

 

[eleanora3]

Aw I thought it was sweet albeit a bit long. Jessa's birthday letters to Ben and Spurgeon are the most genuine and heartfelt ones I've read from the Duggars. She actually takes the time to talk about their individual personalities rather than "I love that you love God. I hope you continue to love God." I never thought she'd be the one who came across as the most loving wife/mother, but she really does.

[singsingsing]

I thought it was a nice letter. And I'll never stop being amused by how surprised so many people are that Jessa and Ben turned out to have the most stable relationship, Jessa turned out to love being a mother, etc. I don't know why, but I always expected that. I think my personality is somewhat similar to Jessa's, maybe, so I could see what she saw in Ben (not that I particularly want to be with someone like Ben - lol), thought they were pretty compatible, and I figured she'd be a doting mother once she had her own kids.

Anyway, that tangent aside... I think one of the main reasons that share this stuff on social media is that they truly believe that this is their mission. They're out to encourage other people and share the gospel via their 'happy, godly marriage'. People think the Duggars are all about money and fame, but don't underestimate the real power of their religion. I still think that's the main driving force in their decision making.

[VineHeart137]

The part about conversations getting heated is what surprised me the most. I don't think I've ever seen a Duggar (or any fundie?) admit to *gasp* arguing with their headship. It's kind of refreshing, actually.

 

(It obviously doesn't mean anything really in the grand scheme of their beliefs though. Just an observation on my part.)

[VelociRapture]

5 minutes ago, VineHeart137 said:

The part about conversations getting heated is what surprised me the most. I don't think I've ever seen a Duggar (or any fundie?) admit to *gasp* arguing with their headship. It's kind of refreshing, actually.

 

(It obviously doesn't mean anything really in the grand scheme of their beliefs though. Just an observation on my part.)

Erin and Chad Paine have discussed marriage taking work. And how they each secretly thought the other was smoking hot before they were courting.

[VineHeart137]

Oh I'm sure Jessa isn't the first fundie to express a realistic view on marriage that isn't all Godly flowers and rainbows, just the first that I've seen (which really isn't saying much since I really only follow the Duggars, and to a much lesser extent, the Bateses).

And oh yes, I've been defrauded by Chad's biceps on many an occasion thanks to Erin's Instagram posts! No wonder their marriage takes work, It's probably hard to tear herself away from staring at his muscles all day.

[nst]

11 hours ago, saywhat7 said:

Long time lurker, first time poster. Sorry if this is off topic but does the math work out the Jessa could be pregnant again when Jill gives birth. I can't remember how many months between pregnancies for her.  Thanks!

I am on your team  and welcome 

and the letter Jessa wrote the world about Ben was heartfelt 

stand by it 

at the same it was so Jessa to bring  up all about God and hearfelt he is 

- but True Love must be wonderful if it is so bloody perfect between them all the time. 

 

I thought we figured out that Jill waited until the exact day, moment second in time  to wait the 18 months she was supposed / allowed to get pregnant because of the C section....I think Jessa's  fertility will be every time a child is 4-5 months and she decides to get pregnant. 

2 hours ago, MadeItOut said:

...and to think at one point she had that coffee date with meechelle trying to work out why he was being affectionate to her. At least she seems happy on that front now.

it's called a storyline 

1 hour ago, VineHeart137 said:

The part about conversations getting heated is what surprised me the most. I don't think I've ever seen a Duggar (or any fundie?) admit to *gasp* arguing with their headship. It's kind of refreshing, actually.

 

(It obviously doesn't mean anything really in the grand scheme of their beliefs though. Just an observation on my part.)

there was an episode where she was pregnant with Spud and it was an enhanced episode and they showed a clip of the two of them in the kitchen creating a board of pictures and they were going at it. She was getting red in the face and everything.  It was fascinating to watch the dynamic because he wanted his way and she wanted her way and she couldn't keep sweet and clearly doesn't have to but to rewatch it makes me laugh all the times. 

[HarleyQuinn]

Who wants to bet Jill tries to 1up this loving birthday letter when Dwreck's bday rolls around?

[Eatingintheprayercloset]

Damn.....I can't believe Ben is the best husband the Duggar girls married so far. I know a lot of people think Jeremy was the catch but at least Ben doesn't seem to think of Jessa as a meek helpmeet and treats her as more of an equal. He also takes on more parenting duties such as changes diapers and getting up in the middle of the night.....not sure if Dirty Jesus or Joshly do this. The one part that stood out to me the most was when Jessa said Ben accepts her personality. A lot of fundie men are probably intimidated by domineering women like Jessa and would try to change them. I'm around Ben's age so it's crazy to me he already has two kids....at least he seems like a more doting father than other dad's I know that are his age. 

[Carm_88]

5 minutes ago, Eatingintheprayercloset said:

Damn.....I can't believe Ben is the best husband the Duggar girls married so far.

I never thought that Ben was a bad husband, mostly that he was young and trying to appear much older and wiser. Which may come from being a couple of years younger than Jessa. He's definitely not settled in the whole job aspect nor do I think that he will be a great preacher, but he seems to be a good husband to Jessa. I hope that he doesn't grow smug. He's a little bit but I hope he doesn't get to Josh and Derick level. 

[HermioneSparrow]

51 minutes ago, HarleyQuinn said:

Who wants to bet Jill tries to 1up this loving birthday letter when Dwreck's bday rolls around?

And she will fail miserably 

[Jatalie1996]

I'll admit, I "aww"ed reading Jessa's letter. I've often questioned whether she and Ben were a good match, especially after the coffee conversation with Michelle that someone else mentioned above. It's kind of refreshing to see this more... emotional? affectionate? side of her that isn't really shown on TV. Their system of finding a spouse may be completely absurd, but it seems to have worked out well for the Duggar girls so far. (Although the jury's still out on Jeremy and Austin.)

[Bad Wolf]

10 minutes ago, Jatalie1996 said:

Their system of finding a spouse may be completely absurd, but it seems to have worked out well for the Duggar girls so far. (Although the jury's still out on Jeremy and Austin.)

I don't think Derick was a great catch. I'd love to know what Jill really feels about their "mission".

[Jatalie1996]

1 minute ago, Bad Wolf said:

I don't think Derick was a great catch. I'd love to know what Jill really feels about their "mission".

Right. I was just thinking more about the beginning of their relationship and how smitten Jill was initially. Time will tell how these marriages actually pan out.

[BadMammaJana]

Jessa could use some serious editing to the letter, and there was that weird "I get to do life with him" line in the beginning, but, I think her writing isn't all that bad. It's not the greatest, but considering she got her education from SOTDT, I think it's pretty good, especially compared to Jill's writing. 

I will let it be known that I've been a SAHM for 2 1/2 years now, and spend most of my day with toddlers who are just learning to speak, so, maybe I'm just easily impressed these days. 

Did anyone else catch the part about Ben's love for Christ, and how at 17 he had more passion for him than men in their 30s? That line was so specific, especially when she added that it wasn't just an act like other guys she knew. At first I thought "well, duh, isn't that all you're surrounded by? Dudes with hearts for the Lord," or whatever they always say? It made me wonder just how many guys in her circle fake their love for Jesus. It also made me think of Josh and his facade, and how Ben probably made her feel safe because his love for God seemed genuine. It made me happy that she found someone that seems to truly love her and treat her as an equal, and it made me sadder for Jill because of the dickwad she's stuck with. 

[Fundie Bunny]

10 hours ago, Pasta said:

Jessa mispronouncing words would be better tv than the kids answering stupid questions like what kind of cheese is Jinger. Show us that stuff, TLC. Ugh.

They should merge with buzzfeed. 

[Lurky]

Jessa is always my least-worst Duggar, but I thought that letter was really sweet and real (although their "how we got to courting" story sounds more like something out of one of the passive-heroine Jane Austens, or Victorian fiction, or Laura Ingalls Wilder than the 21st century....  I saw him at church, my brothers invited him over, I'd see him every couple of weeks, my sisters teased me...  It kind of reminded me of Laura being walked home from church, and being confused by what was going on)

It's also interesting in the context of Duggar-time/storyline time - and I did like her saying she just wanted an engagement ring from Claires, and to save the money (Ingalls Wilder again!)

[Carm_88]

Aww Spurgeon and Henry are adorable!  Oh it's about Ben? Oops! 

[singsingsing]

"Get to do life with you" is a trendy phrase right now. Not sure if it's just among Christians or the general population. Honestly, I hate it, but Jessa didn't invent it. It's the sort of thing you see on a bazillion 20-something Christian newlyweds' instagram posts followed by the hashtag #blessed.

[Four is Enough]

AFA Jessa mispronouncing words: It's fairly common in Baltimore.

A word like hanging might come out as "Hang-ink" or "hangin-guh".. or "han-ghin-guh"

It's really very off-putting to listen to a native Baltimorean speak at times.

[singsingsing]

Oh man, my grandma does the hard g thing. "Hang-ink" is pretty close to how she pronounces "hanging". It's definitely a thing is some places. Not sure why Jessa would do it and not Ben, though. I wonder if her other family members do it? Now I'm curious. Linguistics are so strange sometimes.

[Four is Enough]

I've said this before, I'll say it again, I simply don't understand WHY they write, video, and post these greetings to someone with whom they LIVE...

My husband had heart surgery ten years ago. It was emergency surgery. Cath one day, surgery next. I saw the films of his cath, having been a nurse in an open heart unit and understanding what the films showed.

After his surgery, for our anniversary, I wrote an over the top, effusive letter spelling out just how much he meant to me. I kept it on the computer and printed it out, and it is in our scrapbook, but no way in Hades I'm going to share that with the world.

WHY do they do that?

[nst]

1 minute ago, Four is Enough said:

I've said this before, I'll say it again, I simply don't understand WHY they write, video, and post these greetings to someone with whom they LIVE...

My husband had heart surgery ten years ago. It was emergency surgery. Cath one day, surgery next. I saw the films of his cath, having been a nurse in an open heart unit and understanding what the films showed.

After his surgery, for our anniversary, I wrote an over the top, effusive letter spelling out just how much he meant to me. I kept it on the computer and printed it out, and it is in our scrapbook, but no way in Hades I'm going to share that with the world.

WHY do they do that?

because this is how they show their hearts for being leaders in their community.  They learned from the parents. And because this is what that generation aka Kim K etc has been expected to do and they have a fan base and they know they have a fan base and they want their fan base to watch the show that allows them to go on and on about God and their perfect lives.  It's a way they think will influence people to follow them.  Just look at ugh Audrey Roloff who is becoming more and more insane every day. 

It was such a personal letter I was a little embarrassed = I kept dreaming last night that she included when she knew Henry and Spurgeon were conceived.  In my dream - she told us that Spurgeon was conceived after watching Jaws and Ben was chasing her around the house with an oven mitt.  I have to not go to bed so early  

 

[Coconutwater]

In the letter she mentioned when Ben was going to community college and thinking about transferring to UA, I wonder if the Duggars had something to do with him not going there. That episode where JB asks Ben to move into the shed everyone looked shocked. I think he changed his life plan to stay with Jesssa or JB was going to end everything. Before the move he was going to a regular gym, twitter sounded like a regular guy, and he worked at a real estate agency.