Safe at Home 2: The Continuing Adventures of The Arndts

[gustava]

4 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

The Arndts being single are by far the most perplexing of all the FJ fundies. I get why some of the other FJ fundies are still single. But the Arndts travel and meet new people through their jobs. Many of the boys are quite nice looking. They can't have super strict modesty standards since their mom is always wearing shortie shirts. They seem to have enough money for their own home and family since they all work. They don't seem to be socially awkward or super shy. So I just don't understand why they are single. 

None of us understands it, either.  It is one of the universal unknowns.

[quiversR4hunting]

3 hours ago, gustava said:

None of us understands it, either.  It is one of the universal unknowns.

it is why we all flock to this thread to get any tidbit to make this all make sense!

[Howl]

9 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

The Arndts being single are by far the most perplexing of all the FJ fundies. I get why some of the other FJ fundies are still single. But the Arndts travel and meet new people through their jobs. Many of the boys are quite nice looking. They can't have super strict modesty standards since their mom is always wearing shortie shirts. They seem to have enough money for their own home and family since they all work. They don't seem to be socially awkward or super shy. So I just don't understand why they are single. 

Didn't someone comment a few threads ago that they had met the Arndts, or at least some of the guys chidults and there seemed to be a testosterone deficit?  And yes, it is THE most perplexing thing.  I check in once a week or so to see if something, ANYTHING, has happened, but nope, nope, nope, nada, zip, zero.  And these are the guys that did that awesome shoot of the bride UNDERWATER in a spring somewhere.  Freaking mindblowing! 

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 hours ago, quiversR4hunting said:

it is why we all flock to this thread to get any tidbit to make this all make sense!

So true. They never post anything new or interesting. Yet we are constantly checking the thread. Out of 14 children (almost all adults), someone has to get married in the next 5-10 years! 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I was bored and looking at some Arndt Facebook pages and this made me laugh out loud! People have been trying to set these boys up for years!

 

[socalrules]

On 9/19/2017 at 3:24 PM, JenniferJuniper said:

Oh, but the highlight is the night before!  When you do the always original "It's the day before my birthday" song and dance routine in your parents' bedroom.  

Oh please tell me this is true. I need this to be true. 

[Letgo]

12 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

So I just don't understand why they are single. 

We know Rick has talked to them about waiting for The One God has for them, or however they phrase it. They wait for God's timing and perfect plan. Is it possible that Rick has told them that God will personally speak to them? Or that they need to pray for some very specific sign that a certain woman is The One? There just has to be some reason that NOT ONE of these men has married. Nor have any of them ever courted or dated, or shown any interest in a woman, as far as we know. Since the man is supposed to make the first move, there has to be a reason no one has a woman in his life. I keep thinking the reason is because there is a certain sign, event, message, or whatever that never occurs because it is so specific or unlikely. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

11 hours ago, Letgo said:

We know Rick has talked to them about waiting for The One God has for them, or however they phrase it. They wait for God's timing and perfect plan. Is it possible that Rick has told them that God will personally speak to them? Or that they need to pray for some very specific sign that a certain woman is The One? There just has to be some reason that NOT ONE of these men has married. Nor have any of them ever courted or dated, or shown any interest in a woman, as far as we know. Since the man is supposed to make the first move, there has to be a reason no one has a woman in his life. I keep thinking the reason is because there is a certain sign, event, message, or whatever that never occurs because it is so specific or unlikely. 

I would bet that some have "dated." Meaning they have gotten to know some girls over the years. I doubt they would ever make it public unless it was washcloth throwing serious. 

[Carm_88]

13 hours ago, socalrules said:

Oh please tell me this is true. I need this to be true. 

Oh this is true. It's referenced in one of their youtube videos. It may be referenced here in the video of Philip's 20th birthday. Not 100% sure on that one. 

 

[livinginthelight]

Well, if they're not independent enough to rebel against the revolting-and-sexual-innuendo-filled celebration of their birthday in their parental bedroom, they're definitely not going to think sufficiently out of the box to court a young lady.

An Arndt rebellion:

Son: Mom, Dad, I'd rather have the cake in the kitchen.

Mother Arndt: <"sniff">

Son: Okay.

[katilac]

On 9/20/2017 at 3:05 AM, Corntree said:

Someone may have said this before, but I just had the thought that the kids have their birthday celebrations in their parents' room b/c they were conceived in that room. Just Rick and Cathy bringing things back to where they all started, stressing the importance of all that Godly procreation.

Thank you for that disturbing thought. 

On 9/21/2017 at 9:00 AM, JermajestyDuggar said:

 They seem to have enough money for their own home and family since they all work.  

I wouldn't be so sure about having enough money for their own home and family.

Their photography business appears successful, but that is a really hard gig to make a living at, especially because theirs is a group endeavor (I'm pretty sure?).

Median pay for court reporters is $50,000 annually, which is fine for one person but less great for two adults and a few kids. dh and I were making about that amount combined in the early 1990s, no kids, living in apartments, and we weren't poor but definitely kept a close eye on the spending. 

16 hours ago, Letgo said:

I keep thinking the reason is because there is a certain sign, event, message, or whatever that never occurs because it is so specific or unlikely. 

I agree. I think many courtship fundies think that something magical will happen before they really even know the person, a green light from God to begin courting.

We homeschool, and I personally know quite a few hardcore Christians who are not to the level of this site, but who are very invested in the idea that God has a plan for their life. If their kid doesn't have the stats to get into engineering, it's because God has a different plan for their life, not because they didn't challenge themselves throughout high school. 

And when they pick out curriculum, omg, they like this program but they aren't quite sure that's where God is leading them. God doesn't care, pick out a spelling book already! 

3 hours ago, livinginthelight said:

Son: Mom, Dad, I'd rather have the cake in the kitchen.

Mother Arndt: <"sniff">

Son: Okay.

Funny and sad. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

38 minutes ago, katilac said:

On 9/21/2017 at 10:00 AM, JermajestyDuggar said:

 

I wouldn't be so sure about having enough money for their own home and family.

Their photography business appears successful, but that is a really hard gig to make a living at, especially because theirs is a group endeavor (I'm pretty sure?).

Median pay for court reporters is $50,000 annually, which is fine for one person but less great for two adults and a few kids. dh and I were making about that amount combined in the early 1990s, no kids, living in apartments, and we weren't poor but definitely kept a close eye on the spending. 

I will say that living at home for many years of your young adult life can really help cut expenses so you can save up quite a bit of money for a modest home and wedding. I'm sure the adult boys contribute to the costs of the home but they are still saving a lot of money. 

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Don't forget that the working Arndt kidults have been supporting 16 people since Rick "retired"  Plus they are paying for the never ending shoots and reshoots and reshoots of Vine Valley, including all the travel costs.  AND........ Mom and Dad's recent anniversary trip was paid for by the working kidults.

The kidults haven't saved up a ton of money by living at home -- they spent their money supporting that home and the family.  The Arndt boy-men can't afford to marry as long as Rick, Cathy and Vine Valley are around.

 

 

[MarblesMom]

1 hour ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Plus they are paying for the never ending shoots and reshoots and reshoots of Vine Valley

This story is another one I tried to CliffNotes for my visiting adult niece.  She gave me a blank stare after my brief synopsis.  (I am sure she is checking out Shady Pines for me now.)

I hope the final wrap on VV happens before Dad leaves us to his Great And Final Reward.  Otherwise, how will we ever see the Final Version?!

[Lurky]

I guess the average woman would look at an Arndt in his late 20s or 30s, maybe like him, but find out about his living situation and say "hell no!".  But I have always been surprised that there hasn't been a woman who's wanted to rescue one of them.  It would be one hell of a job to deal with that level of enmeshment, but for someone who likes to be that rescuer, it could be one hell of a challenge!

(I still wonder if the plan is they all have one gigantic joint wedding!)

[Howl]

A faint light is showing on the eastern horizon and the Arndt household is not yet stirring.  The Arndt chidult assigned to check goes into an upstairs bathroom and looks into the bathtub.  No washcloth has magically appeared.  He reports to Rick.  "Nope, not today, Dad" and sadly trudges downstairs to begin the day. 

[gustava]

10 hours ago, MarblesMom said:

I am sure she is checking out Shady Pines for me now.)

Completely OT but I laughed at your reference to Shady Pines.  My mother is now living in an upscale retirement community which we call Shady Pines, ala The Golden Girls.

[Chocolatedefrauded]

It might be the math too. It is easier to find a partner when you are in your teens or 20s when most people are single. At a certain point, it seems like everyone besides you is married or engaged. I lived through this period. I doubt the Arndts would find a divorced women or one with a child who had never married acceptable. They would insist on a religious virgin, right? I don't think those are easy to find for older bachelors. Especially not for older bachors with very emeshed family.

So yeah, most woman would run away from those kidults!

[Lurky]

23 minutes ago, Chocolatedefrauded said:

It might be the math too. It is easier to find a partner when you are in your teens or 20s when most people are single

I get this for the older guys - but there are Arndts of all ages, from mid teens to nearly 40s, no?

[JermajestyDuggar]

But in the fundie world, it's ok to marry an older guy. Especially if you are an old maid of 28.

[Indigo]

13 hours ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Don't forget that the working Arndt kidults have been supporting 16 people since Rick "retired"  Plus they are paying for the never ending shoots and reshoots and reshoots of Vine Valley, including all the travel costs.  AND........ Mom and Dad's recent anniversary trip was paid for by the working kidults.

The kidults haven't saved up a ton of money by living at home -- they spent their money supporting that home and the family.  The Arndt boy-men can't afford to marry as long as Rick, Cathy and Vine Valley are around.

 

 

Plus Rick & Cathy frequently go to "Maine" (Red Lobster) for meals & there are frequent birthday meals out with Dad, Mom & chosen siblings. Rick seems to have a "meeting on wheels" on a daily basis (often several times a day) & these typically involve a meal &/or "fountain soda".  

There always seems to be plenty of money for Vine Valley trips, vacations & the various annual gatherings they throw such as the Softball Classic & Memorial Day & 4th of July celebrations.

Rick refers to the master bedroom as The Upper Room.  This is where the family gathers twice a day for prayer, plus birthday celebrations.  

[Jigsaw3]

On 9/16/2017 at 0:35 AM, katilac said:

My dd may be in Montreal for an internship this summer. Her sister may go with her, so a 19-yr old and 17-yr old.  Do you know if they have any extended stay type places that might be fairly reasonable to rent? 

Check out the universities. I know Concordia and McGill rent out residences in the summer to people doing exactly that; not sure if it's dorms or apartment style. UQAM may as well, as might Universite de Montreal (but that's not downtown.)

Back on topic: as an unmarried 30-something heterosexual woman. I'd definitely consider the Arndt brothers as prospective spouses. They're clearly handy, decently domestic, and quite active. They're decently attractive. But would they be willing to cut the apron strings? Would any of them be willing to tell his brothers that he expects his fair portion of the revenue from court reporting or photography to go to him directly for the support of his separate family? Would he be able to buck Arndt tradition and invite his parents over for birthday cake after dinner in his own house in lieu of incestuous master bedroom celebrations? That's the problem.

[Chocolatedefrauded]

Do they have some weird thing where the oldest has to marry before the others? I know some families are like that with daughters.

[Carm_88]

I think the Arndts are in a strange place Fundie wise. I don't think they would be fundie enough for most of the fundie families that we discuss here. Yet, I think that they are too religious for the average person. So where will their potential spouse come from? I don't know! I hope that they break free, they really do seem like super nice guys who just nee to cut the apron strings. 

By the way, if James is breaking free and needs someone to show him the way in the world *I volunteer as tribute!*

[Corntree]

Well, David, the youngest, is I think 14.5, so maybe they will wait for him to turn 18 so they can all get married at once. But moving out will still be out of the question, so they'll have to find space for all the spouses at Casa Arndt.

OMG, does Rick really call the master bedroom the Upper Room? Like where Jesus and his disciples had the Last Supper? And I knew about the birthday celebrations, but they pray in there too? Holy crap, how big is this man's ego?