Jesse Maxwell is gonna homeschool

[sparkles]

Neither Melanie nor Nathan have ever dated. They have kept themselves emotionally and physically pure in anticipation of the one person the Lord would have for them to spend their lives with.

Hmm, they really have to turn themselves inside out to spin Chris and Joseph's broken engagements because according to this, they're fucked, and not in a good way. No wonder they've retconned both out of existence.

[uber frau]

Even after Liz dumped Joe, there were comments to the effect of "well, at least they didn't get to involved, so at least they're still pure".

I'm not sure what's worse: being so deprived of any normal relationships that they fall hard for the first person daddy agrees to, or being so emotionally detached that there is no emotional implications for being practically jilted at the altar.

[singsingsing]

I don't understand how people can live like that. I went on a date the other night, the guy was perfectly nice and on paper we should have been perfect for each other, but there was just no chemistry, no connection. And I don't mean I didn't want to jump on him and rip his clothes off, I mean there was nothing. He was pleasant to talk to but he might as well have been a female friend or a relative. All I could think afterwards was, "If I were a fundie this would be it. We would be courting now, and expected to marry."

You can't marry someone like that. That person has to be your closest confidant and sexual partner. If you marry someone without emotional or physical attraction, you risk coming to resent them and being miserable very quickly. How is that a 'holy' or 'pure' foundation for what is supposed to be the most important human relationship of your life?

[Odd1Out]

OH NO THE HORROR!!!!!!!! How did the Maxwell's ever survive such a harrowing ordeal! Clearly, if the staff had just followed the typed out instructions, the family's time with the evil, heathen waitstaff would have been minimized! His children, had to talk to a person of the opposite sex to to get their drink!

Dear Steve and Teri

F-you!

Signed

A former banquet hall waitress of 6 years.

How in the world do they survive daily life when they dare leave their home??

You may be able to control your family Steve, but you cannot control everyone else in life. Get over yourself.

[Luisainlondon1]

I don't understand how people can live like that. I went on a date the other night, the guy was perfectly nice and on paper we should have been perfect for each other, but there was just no chemistry, no connection. And I don't mean I didn't want to jump on him and rip his clothes off, I mean there was nothing. He was pleasant to talk to but he might as well have been a female friend or a relative. All I could think afterwards was, "If I were a fundie this would be it. We would be courting now, and expected to marry."

You can't marry someone like that. That person has to be your closest confidant and sexual partner. If you marry someone without emotional or physical attraction, you risk coming to resent them and being miserable very quickly. How is that a 'holy' or 'pure' foundation for what is supposed to be the most important human relationship of your life?

I agree. But in many societies there are arranged marriages and not all of them are unhappy about it. I am not a defender of arranged marriages or courtships of fundies. But I do believe that their way of thinking is just different than ours. If everyone is excited for you that now you are in a courtship and you think that the Lord wants you to marry this person, you might actually believe this and be happy about it. They've never felt the excitement before the first kiss with the person you have a crush on or ordinary things that we are used to. They haven't made the experience that the better you know a person (emotionally and physically) your love grows. Their expectations are just different.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

The other thing about arranged marriages (where they're traditional) is that both parties go into it with the same expectations, that it's almost like a business partnership at first (with the "business" being a functional household, possibly even with an actual business involved), progresses to friends, eventually to very good friends, etc. But they fully expect that it takes time.

What I don't get are the people who fetishize this "Dad (inspired by God Himself!) picks the partner" type thing and yet at the same time have these ideas that when the right one comes along you'll be madly in love with "the one God chose for you" right off the bat.

It sort of reminds me of the people who simultaneously fetishized the "Mother is there for her children, 24/7, attending to their every need" and the "Mother is there for Father 24/7" trends, both of which have existed in various times/places (among the upper classes) but not at the same time, to come up with this unattainable ideal housewife where Mom of course stays home, is everything for the kids, but ready for Dad's every sexual whim after work, and oh yeah by the way also keeping a perfect household too where you can eat off the floor.

...without any staff, naturally.

[nokidsmom]

Even after Liz dumped Joe, there were comments to the effect of "well, at least they didn't get to involved, so at least they're still pure".

I'm not sure what's worse: being so deprived of any normal relationships that they fall hard for the first person daddy agrees to, or being so emotionally detached that there is no emotional implications for being practically jilted at the altar.

To the bolded: only in the fundie world would people say this and it shows what's really wrong with the whole purity obssession. This a cancelled wedding, done the week before! For non fundies, this would be a very big deal not just because of the wedding arrangements. One would expect for the couple to be very involved with each other at this point because they're getting married. The emotional impact of a cancelled wedding would be considerable. For them not to be too involved? That's just weird.

[nokidsmom]

I don't remember them getting all emotional about Christopher leaving after his marriage. Maybe they were tired of him being so old and still living at home. LOL.

Christopher seems to be a carbon copy of Steve. Maybe there was room for only one "Steve" in the house.

And yes, the crying over Nathan's wedding really seems over the top. It's like they "lost" him even though he's going to be living across the street and in a sense, isn't really leaving anyway. And they got to control things regarding the wedding. And they are still crying?

Any whiff of not having any control seems to send this family over the edge. I can only imagine the impact that the cancelled wedding had. To be a fly on the wall when that happened.

[WonderingInWA]

Christopher seems to be a carbon copy of Steve. Maybe there was room for only one "Steve" in the house.

And yes, the crying over Nathan's wedding really seems over the top. It's like they "lost" him even though he's going to be living across the street and in a sense, isn't really leaving anyway. And they got to control things regarding the wedding. And they are still crying?

Any whiff of not having any control seems to send this family over the edge. I can only imagine the impact that the cancelled wedding had. To be a fly on the wall when that happened.

There were TWO canceled weddings. When Christopher was engaged the first time, they had a wedding date set in the month of October of that year (I don't remember what year that was). So there was an engagement ring and a wedding date. But it was Steve who canceled that future wedding, or so it appeared, and it was a couple of months beforehand, so the situation was different than the unfortunate Joseph/Elizabeth situation.

[Justme]

Big difference between Nath and Chris. Nath was 24, bought a house, then married Mel. Chris was much older at 32ish, and lost his purity due to a broken courtship/engagement.

IMHO, but I think Steve's shitin' a brick because at least one of the reversal boys isn't married yet. It just doesn't look good for business.

[Jana814]

IMHO, but I think Steve's shitin' a brick because at least one of the reversal boys isn't married yet. It just doesn't look good for business.

Same here!

[nokidsmom]

There were TWO canceled weddings. When Christopher was engaged the first time, they had a wedding date set in the month of October of that year (I don't remember what year that was). So there was an engagement ring and a wedding date. But it was Steve who canceled that future wedding, or so it appeared, and it was a couple of months beforehand, so the situation was different than the unfortunate Joseph/Elizabeth situation.

Do remember that there were two cancellations but the second time around was indeed different and suspect it must have had a lot more impact. I think in the case of the first cancellation, if Steve had a hand in it, then it wouldn't have been as bad because once again, it was in their control plus it was done with more time before the wedding. In the second instance, it clearly was not a Maxwell controlled decision and Steve's mind must have been in a state of near implosion over the fact that a woman made a choice not to marry his son plus now they had to scramble to cover for this sudden cancellation. Really bad for the business. He couldn't control it and I wouldn't be surprised on one hand if he seriously asked Liz, via her father, to reconsider. On the other hand, maybe not. Because at that point Liz would not be deemed suitable Maxhell wife material.

[Hane]

Good God.

I have only one child, and am a "dwidow" (long divorced from her dad, who died several years later). She and I are very close, but I came nowhere near to falling into a pit of grief when she got married (or when she went away to college, or when she moved out and into her first apartment). And she lives--GOD HELP US!!!--fourteen miles away from me.

Did I get choked up a little on these occasions? Sure--I'm not a robot. (I nearly lost it, though, at her wedding reception, as the parents and the wedding party were escorted in; when I was announced, she had the DJ play ebil Muslim Cat Stevens' song "Wild World," because she WANTED me to get all choked up: "I'll always remember you as a child.")

And re Jesse and his intention to homeschool his putative children: Of course he's going to say that. That's all he knows. It's about as revolutionary as any one of us parents here saying that we'd like to see our kids go to college or train for a skilled profession.

[salex]

I don't understand how people can live like that. I went on a date the other night, the guy was perfectly nice and on paper we should have been perfect for each other, but there was just no chemistry, no connection. And I don't mean I didn't want to jump on him and rip his clothes off, I mean there was nothing. He was pleasant to talk to but he might as well have been a female friend or a relative. All I could think afterwards was, "If I were a fundie this would be it. We would be courting now, and expected to marry."

You can't marry someone like that. That person has to be your closest confidant and sexual partner. If you marry someone without emotional or physical attraction, you risk coming to resent them and being miserable very quickly. How is that a 'holy' or 'pure' foundation for what is supposed to be the most important human relationship of your life?

I suspect this is where so many of the amazingly depressing marriage advice blogs and books the fundies promote come from. If their marriage has no chemistry, and absolute obedience is required, how resentful and hate filled might life become?

[SPHASH]

OH NO THE HORROR!!!!!!!! How did the Maxwell's ever survive such a harrowing ordeal! Clearly, if the staff had just followed the typed out instructions, the family's time with the evil, heathen waitstaff would have been minimized! His children, had to talk to a person of the opposite sex to to get their drink!

Dear Steve and Teri

F-you!

Signed

A former banquet hall waitress of 6 years.

They had a seating arrangement at the rehearsal dinner? Every rehearsal dinner I've been to you could sit wherever you wanted. And what is the big deal deal with hollering out Sprite Sprite Coke Coke? Was Teri mad no Pepsi was available?

[WonderingInWA]

Any rehearsal dinner I have ever been to was very casual and there was no seating arrangement. But I can understand them doing it to help the restaurant wait staff and honestly, giving them a list of orders and seats should have helped the restaurant pull it off without a hitch (and I'm sure that's why they put up the "plan"). Unfortunately, the best laid plans don't always happen per the plan (think "childbirth plan" here -- LOL!). I was THAT BRIDE -- I had a plan for everything, but not everything happened to plan. You can only control people to the extent that they take your orders seriously.

[Mela99]

So why is it okay for HIM to speculate on getting married, but the wimmin-folk have to sit down/shut up/and be content if God never brings them spouses?

[Melissa1977]

Who is homeschooling Abigail? she is turning 6 this year I think.

I find very strange that a family whose bussiness is homeschooling is not showing the grandkids homeschooling.

Maybe Melanie and Nathan are private people and doesn't want to show their life... but they take part in family events and concerts and photoshoots.

And no, I don't think Abigail is going to any kind of school (even a coop), not in a million years.

[kpmom]

So why is it okay for HIM to speculate on getting married, but the wimmin-folk have to sit down/shut up/and be content if God never brings them spouses?

Now Mela99, you know the answer. It begins with P and ends with atriarchy.

It's the answer to everything the fundies do.

[sparkles]

Who is homeschooling Abigail? she is turning 6 this year I think.

I find very strange that a family whose bussiness is homeschooling is not showing the grandkids homeschooling.

Maybe Melanie and Nathan are private people and doesn't want to show their life... but they take part in family events and concerts and photoshoots.

And no, I don't think Abigail is going to any kind of school (even a coop), not in a million years.

For the most part, unless the families of the married sons cross paths with the remainder of the Maxwell collective, they don't merit any mentions on the Titus 2 blog. Steve noted this at one point in answer to a question. He considers those families to be their own separate units (as if) and that their day-to-day lives shouldn't be part of the regular Titus 2 blog (which is really how it should be). If the girls visit or if the families have an activity together, then we see them. Otherwise, their private lives are pretty much private. Unless, of course, Steve thinks it's necessary to trot them out.

So while I'm pretty much 99.9% certain that Melanie DOES homeschool, it's not something we're privy to.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Bet that puts the "kids" off marrying, that nomatter how close and dependant they are on their family, once theyre married they aren't considered part of the family...I guess that's a scary thought for them

[SisiL78]

They are going to have to marry off the remaining children. It seems that Anna and Mary may have had some attention, but those guys have flown the coup. I anticipate that Steve is going to lower his standards considerably for the next batch. There are probably a lot of fundy girls out there would be over the moon for Jesse or Joseph, and wouldn't have any clue about how bad Maxhell could be. Rebecca Eleventy is unfortunately one of these girls. She is right there commenting on their posts (or used to) and clearly just sitting at home waiting for her prince's father to ring up. Yes, she's dowdier and larger than the typical Maxwell but I wouldn't put it past Steve to call up a father and tell him that if he sent his daughter to fat camp and out for a makeover that she'd be a bride in no time. I wouldn't see them as being past the idea of grooming a woman to act and look like the idea bride and making sure that she felt ever so grateful.

Honestly, the girls who are looking at living in a cramped house/trailer might see the Maxwell lifestyle as luxurious and pampered. It might be harder to find husbands since there is a higher likelihood of boys leaving the fundy fold, but even then there have got to be families like the Arndts (but perhaps less insane) who would have plenty of half dumb/brainwashed sons that they are looking to unload.

I am shocked that their level of desperation hasn't gotten this far yet!

[WonderingInWA]

Yes, poor Rebecca Eleventy. She really wanted to be a Maxwell. She doesn't comment as much as she used to on their blog, but she shows up every now and then (with fewer exclamation points, which is a relief). And I think she's 23ish, so getting pretty old for fundie matchmaking, and I get the feeling that she may be developmentally delayed (gut instinct based on how she writes and her general appearance -- can't really put my finger on it). Hopefully some fundie guy will snap her up or she'll be living in that trailer forever.

[Jana814]

Have to agree about Rebecca. I think she would do anything to be a Maxwell.

[johnhugh]

Have to agree about Rebecca. I think she would do anything to be a Maxwell.

I think Stevie was too concerned about the upload of sugar intake on the family if Mrs Evelenty bought round one of her infamous cakes!!1!!!!1