All things Razing Ruth

[VaSportsMom]

This is all so disturbing. I tended to believe RR and always assumed that any inconsistencies were just attempts to protect her privacy but a baby is one hell of an inconsistency and I can't just write that off. IF this is a scam, then there is no way that it was her first. I'm really disappointed in the way that this has played out. It will now be ten times harder for a real Gothard/Fundy victim to get the help or support they need. It sucks that real victims pay the price for these scammers.

[Mama Mia]

I hope she comes back! This feels like when a favorite tv series gets suddenly cancelled with hanging story lines !

[OkToBeTakei]

I hope she comes back! This feels like when a favorite tv series gets suddenly cancelled with hanging story lines !

If she walks out of a shower and says it is all a dream I am going to be well pissed off!!

[NurseNell]

Now that the majority of Helpmeets have had an opportunity to get caught up on this thread and participate in the discussion, we've decided that it's time to move it back to Snark Chatter.

It seems to be back in Snark. :?

[tuckerphez]

To the person that was asking about the "were you the x family that had a rabbit" comment:

razingruth.blogspot.com/2013/02/interesting-developments-and-questions.html

Relevant part here:

Mary, I've been addicted to your story since someone pointed me to it ten days ago. I think I'm caught up. I have a question or two if you don't mind. I was a Gothard kid, too. Homeschooled and ATIed. Were you the xxxxxxxxxxx family that used to live in NW Arkansas? We may have stayed with you once. Were you gone by 1995 because I remember you if you are that family? You were maybe 11 or 12? What happened to your rabbit?" Brandywine

Yes. That was us. I remember your first name. Glad to see you got out of that too. You should go over to freejinger and tell your story. If YOU are who I think you are, your story is better. You're living a great life from what I hear. :) The rabbit was eaten.

[mrs]

This is all so disturbing. I tended to believe RR and always assumed that any inconsistencies were just attempts to protect her privacy but a baby is one hell of an inconsistency and I can't just write that off. IF this is a scam, then there is no way that it was her first. I'm really disappointed in the way that this has played out. It will now be ten times harder for a real Gothard/Fundy victim to get the help or support they need. It sucks that real victims pay the price for these scammers.

I always wanted to believe Ruths story. But it seems that it may be a "fictional" story.

I encourage others to check out the Broken Daughters Blog:

http://brokendaughters.wordpress.com/ge ... ife-story/

The author is a daughter of patriarchy/ Quieverfull Movement.The first time I read her life story, I cried.

(She does not ask for donations)

Edited to fix formatting

[happy atheist]

It seems to be back in Snark. :?

Oops. Snark is what I meant to say. I'm going to go back and make that change, to avoid confusion.

[Lainey]

There are a few more things that, in hindsight, are bothering me. First, she claimed to have started the blog on the advice of her therapist. What kind of therapist would suggest writing a public blog to deal with your past? My therapist tried to warn me away from posting those sorts of things on the internet.

Also, has she EVER, here or on her blog, shown concern for anyone who's not her, and also not related to her? Anyone she doesn't know at all? Because that seems strange to me. There are sooo many reasons to be concerned about your fellow humans. Wars, natural disasters (which seem to have been plentiful lately, at least to me), school shootings, bombings, etc. And yet, I can't remember a single time she's ever mentioned anything like that, even in passing. Maybe I missed it? Or has it really been all "me me me?"

[freejugar]

it's really weird that she put that txt file in her blog

who even knows how to do that?

[mrs]

There are a few more things that, in hindsight, are bothering me. First, she claimed to have started the blog on the advice of her therapist. What kind of therapist would suggest writing a public blog to deal with your past? My therapist tried to warn me away from posting those sorts of things on the internet.

Also, has she EVER, here or on her blog, shown concern for anyone who's not her, and also not related to her? Anyone she doesn't know at all? Because that seems strange to me. There are sooo many reasons to be concerned about your fellow humans. Wars, natural disasters (which seem to have been plentiful lately, at least to me), school shootings, bombings, etc. And yet, I can't remember a single time she's ever mentioned anything like that, even in passing. Maybe I missed it? Or has it really been all "me me me?"

Lainey, you make a great point.

Has she ever commented on anyone's blog? Other stories from NLQ?

[nokidsmom]

it's really weird that she put that txt file in her blog

who even knows how to do that?

Yes, I found that weird as well.

Lainey makes some good points. And I still find it really telling that not one poster from here has come forward and said they have met her or had any kind of contact from her. If anyone had, they would have very likely reported it by now and on this thread.

[Peas n carrots]

To the person that was asking about the "were you the x family that had a rabbit" comment:

razingruth.blogspot.com/2013/02/interesting-developments-and-questions.html

Relevant part here:

At this point you never know if the other poster is a sock or not.

[VaSportsMom]

I always wanted to believe Ruths story. But it seems that it may be a "fictional" story.

I encourage others to check out the Broken Daughters Blog:

http://brokendaughters.wordpress.com/ge ... ife-story/

The author is a daughter of patriarchy/ Quieverfull Movement.The first time I read her life story, I cried.

(She does not ask for donations)

Edited to fix formatting

Thanks for that link. I will go read her blog. RR always interested me because my paternal family is Fundy. My dad left the church before I was born but he was his mom's pick so there was never the shunning that Ruth described. I grew up with a front row seat to watch the crazy but was never subjected to it (other than stupid stuff like my cousins never being allowed in my room for fear that the NKOTB posters or music might forever corrupt them).

[VaSportsMom]

Yes, I found that weird as well.

Lainey makes some good points. And I still find it really telling that not one poster from here has come forward and said they have met her or had any kind of contact from her. If anyone had, they would have very likely reported it by now and on this thread.

I think that was what pushed me over to the scam side. She made a point of saying that she had met people from here but nobody has spoke up to say they actually met her. It kinda sucks that being here has given her a bit more legitimacy than she might have had otherwise.

[Oddeverything]

Thanks to the mods for moving this thread to Snark. I appreciate it because it will give this information the chance to be viewed by more people. I also appreciate that the mods checked for sockpuppets but I still encourage them to be wary. I think anyone who has ever run a site that deals with controversial subject matter knows how easy it is for people to use multiple IP addresses.

I do hope Ruth comes back to explain these problems but if she doesn't, no one should be surprised. I can't imagine how anyone can explain just the TWoP baby reference, let alone all the issues that have been raised, unless the explanation is "I lied and I need help." The TWoP baby, the brother with stage 4 cancer, the completely inexplicable cross country job offer in a field crowded with far more qualified candidates - those alone are enough for me to close the chapter of Ruth. But if she does come back to explain all of this, I for one will be very polite and kind to her, even as I remain very skeptical.

But being polite and kind does not mean accepting explanations that do not genuinely clear these things up. The days of "I am protecting my identity" being enough to shut down questioning are over when one squanders their trust capital as badly as Ruth has. And that does not mean she has to identify herself. Rather, it means that she can no longer say, "Oh, well, I was making that up so no one could identify me" and hope we accept that as a reasonable explanation for all these lies. No one needs to plant a fake comment about a baby or mention a brother with cancer in order to shield her identity while she tells so many other details about her family, details that if they were true likely would have revealed her identity long ago.

And it bears repeating - everyone who supported Ruth and gave her money or sincere affection should not feel bad for believing her story. The blame in a scam belongs to the scammer, not those scammed. Being kind and caring about other people is nothing anyone should ever feel foolish about. When your kindness is exploited, it is not your fault and you should not feel as if you were somehow stupid or naive.

[KitCatCadillac]

There are a few more things that, in hindsight, are bothering me. First, she claimed to have started the blog on the advice of her therapist. What kind of therapist would suggest writing a public blog to deal with your past? My therapist tried to warn me away from posting those sorts of things on the internet.

Dude, John Watson's therapist totally told him to blog. And then his blog became totally popular because of Sherlock. And the catchy titles. Everybody loves a mystery.

[Morton Fan]

I've never been quiet about the fact that I thought/think Ruth is a total scam. But, I can't help feeling kind of sad now that it's been (mostly) verified. What kind of inner sickness/sadness/loneliness/turmoil must someone be undergoing to create such elaborate lies?

[Ralar]

It was a FJ member who is a lawyer, and she directed her to a CA lawyer. at least, that is what I remember.

Wasn't it a FJer who referred R/M to her sister, an attorney in California>

[Mama Mia]

Over on TWOP a 'prominent former poster' is now theorizing that the admins at FJ are probably in on the scam and/or Alecto is actually the Raising Ruth persona :popcorn2:

Reading over on that child free forum......the member in question seemed to have an incredibly similar story.

I kind of am leaning towards the person (forget who) who theorized the maybe Rachel and Ruth's stories are a combination of the same person. Maybe "Ruth" was traumatized by an early pregnancy that ended in adoption or losing the baby and felt the need to work the experience into her narrative.

Eta: While her story, to me, is certainly seeming more and more like a con, I do have to say that I worked in social services agencies for years, and the number and range of catastrophes doesn't seem that far-fetched. We would of course get a few people who exaggerated or manufactured their issues, but many people really do have a life of constant crises.

[Coconut Flan]

That has bothered me, too, Lainey. It's a constant stream of woe is me without adding anything about anyone else except woe is me stories of her family. In my mind I'd classified it as the whining without her lot in life ever truly improving and it had gotten on my last nerve. She was finally in a place where her life should have been coming together for over a year now and yet she was still lurching from catastrophe to catastrophe and no joy to be found in anything except possibly her sister's baby. I was ready to wash my hands if for no other reason than it had become a downer to read. It seemed like she was never really making progress.

There are parallels with the PM story. There it was hatred of the Gosselins with embellished but frequently believable stories, woe is her or her family, and then maxing out the drama to an unbelievable point with people stalking her or her "son." Now we have hatred of ATI/Gothard with embellished (possibly) but maybe believable stories of her parents and childhood, plenty of woe is her or her family (to the point of not being believable taken altogether), and now I think we're at the maxing out the drama stage with the move and the latest dramatic hospitalization. I was going to say the only thing we were missing was a family death, but Darth Daddy conveniently died recently. PM was discovered and tracked to her real life identity. There are some holes and errors in the sleuthing, but the overall story lead to the actual person. She had done this kind of thing before IIRC so it's plausible she's at it again or someone else who followed the same pattern.

I'd still like for Ruth to be real if for no other reason than if it's a scam, it taints the believability of other escape and mistreatment stories. I never gave more than my time to read and occasionally comment here and the entertainment value has been worth the time, but I'll still be somewhat ticked for being lied to if it's a scam.

I'm laughing at the Alecto is Razing Ruth theory. I almost proposed that as a joke the other day and then thought it was a bit more caustic than funny.

[martian]

Yes, I found that weird as well.

Lainey makes some good points. And I still find it really telling that not one poster from here has come forward and said they have met her or had any kind of contact from her. If anyone had, they would have very likely reported it by now and on this thread.

I've been PM-ing back and forth with Ruth since the trek to the Chicago job started as I mentioned in a post on this thread just before it blew up. We were talking about getting together. No, it hasn't happened yet. I'm referred to in the "Plea" post on her blog as "Crock pot reader", that being one of the items I've offered her to help her get her new place together.

I only noticed that this thread had blown up a couple of days ago and have been wary of stepping into the middle of it. I don't feel comfortable blabbing things from Ruth's PMs to me, and that's understandably what everyone's bound to have questions about.

[Daenerys]

I'm reading this thread and getting bits and pieces of the story but I can't quite fit it all together... can someone give me the crib notes?

[Morton Fan]

I've been PM-ing back and forth with Ruth since the trek to the Chicago job started as I mentioned in a post on this thread just before it blew up. We were talking about getting together. No, it hasn't happened yet. I'm referred to in the "Plea" post on her blog as "Crock pot reader", that being one of the items I've offered her to help her get her new place together.

I only noticed that this thread had blown up a couple of days ago and have been wary of stepping into the middle of it. I don't feel comfortable blabbing things from Ruth's PMs to me, and that's understandably what everyone's bound to have questions about.

Eh. I think at this point, I'm far more interested in hearing her defend herself on FJ. Doubtful, but one can hope ...

[Ex 2x2]

I just discovered this thread yesterday b/c I very rarely go to chatter. I actually clicked on chatter yesterday by accident and saw it. So I've been reading like crazy to catch up.

I know it makes me sound incredibly gullible, but I can't help but hope that there is some reasonable explanation. I hope she'll come back and it will all make sense.

edited to delete the part about RMNP since I had that all kinds of wrong.

[Ex 2x2]

Martian,

Do you believe she's who she says she is?