You've got to read it to believe it... Abigail Cries Poor

[miffy]

I'm from an upper middle class background & whilst i'm not amazing with money. I can save & only have feline headships to support. A school friend from an even more uuuhh upper middle class background (quite rich) is better with money than anybody else I know. He doesn't earn a massive wage, but he bought a house at 22 in an area mostly populated by professionals buying bigger family homes. Without help from his parents, on top of that he travels for months at a time.

Shes got a law degree! she could work 2 days in the office, 2 days at home & buy fresh flowers every week without having to sacrifice things like food for children.

[2xx1xy1JD]

I'm from an upper middle class background & whilst i'm not amazing with money. I can save & only have feline headships to support. A school friend from an even more uuuhh upper middle class background (quite rich) is better with money than anybody else I know. He doesn't earn a massive wage, but he bought a house at 22 in an area mostly populated by professionals buying bigger family homes. Without help from his parents, on top of that he travels for months at a time.

Shes got a law degree! she could work 2 days in the office, 2 days at home & buy fresh flowers every week without having to sacrifice things like food for children.

Money management skills don't always depend on whether your family of origin was rich or poor. It's more likely connected to how they related to money.

Some families take money management seriously - kids are taught to plan ahead, there is an allowance and/or payment for certain chores, and kids are expected to use that to pay for non-essentials.

Some families equate money with love - they see having a "magic wallet" as a sign of giving love to their kids, so the thought of telling a child to save and use their own allowance is horrifying.

Some families equate money with control - they can be very generous but make it clear that the money comes with strings, and that they will cut off support if the child goes against them. They deliberately create dependence in their adult kids in order to keep them child-like. These families are often headed by a patriarch with a family business. They keep my busy with prenup agreements....and divorces. [i'll sometimes ask "would you still be married if your ex was an orphan?", and the answer is often yes.]

Some families spend freely when times are good, and cut back when times are tough. The mere thought of budgeting used to give my husband palpitations, because in his house it was only done when they were going broke.

[darareaksmey]

Shes got a law degree! she could work 2 days in the office, 2 days at home & buy fresh flowers every week without having to sacrifice things like food for children.

Precisely. There's a pretty easy way to help herself, and that's to WORK. If you must homeschool and be home with your precious babiez, then get something you can do online or when the kids are down. The bar mag here often has want ads for JDs to assist in research and writing. If she'd get off the damned blog and put some of her training to use, she could supplement the income and buy the occasional Hobby Lobby crap.

[Conuly]

I'm from an upper middle class background & whilst i'm not amazing with money. I can save & only have feline headships to support. A school friend from an even more uuuhh upper middle class background (quite rich) is better with money than anybody else I know. He doesn't earn a massive wage, but he bought a house at 22 in an area mostly populated by professionals buying bigger family homes. Without help from his parents, on top of that he travels for months at a time.

Shes got a law degree! she could work 2 days in the office, 2 days at home & buy fresh flowers every week without having to sacrifice things like food for children.

For that matter, if she cut out the other crap then she could afford a small allowance for herself without breaking the bank! They aren't actually impoverished, and it's nice for everybody to have some spending money if they can afford it.

Looking at all her little splurges, it's not the flowers that are breaking the bank.

And I'm re-reading the post, and it's all the same - idiotic lack of planning. And what bothers me is she apparently has no qualms or compunction about telling everybody how stupid she is. I just do not understand that. More than I don't understand her messed up fiscal priorities, I don't understand why she isn't embarrassed to boast about it.

[valsa]

And I'm re-reading the post, and it's all the same - idiotic lack of planning. And what bothers me is she apparently has no qualms or compunction about telling everybody how stupid she is. I just do not understand that. More than I don't understand her messed up fiscal priorities, I don't understand why she isn't embarrassed to boast about it.

I think, in her messed up worldview, stupidness is next to godliness. The dumber she acts, the more pious she must be or something.

[MamaJunebug]

BULL SHIT!

The thing is she hasn't chosen poverty. She has CHOSEN to make her children suffer so she can indulge her own whims and then say "poor me" in one breath and then in the other "look and see how pious I am!"

If SHE wanted to take a vow of poverty etc for three years then SHE should have gone without purchased flowers, music lessons, fencing, etc.

She's an embarrassment to Third-Order Carmelites who truly do choose poverty and live sincere lives of devotion.

Feh! :twisted:

ETA: PS, "chastity"? as a married mother of 5? I sincerely doubt it.

(yes, "sincere" is my word of the day) ;)

ET also A: Ah, I see that "chastity" of a married person basically = fidelity. Whatever.

[Closed Womb]

I mean come on lady, they're just not that into you.

:clap:

[lilwriter85]

I don't think Abigail will ever be embarrassed about her mismanagement of money because of the Carmelite thing. I do wonder if the cello rental and fencing lessons are done so Abigial can have small rewards. I remember years ago, some priests and nuns used to encourage each other to have hobbies or indulge in things once in awhile. My parents were friends with a priest who used to play tennis a couple of times a month. Abigail can't really afford her indulgences and her children end up suffering because of that.

[NurseNell]

ETA: PS, "chastity"? as a married mother of 5? I sincerely doubt it.

(yes, "sincere" is my word of the day) ;)

ET also A: Ah, I see that "chastity" of a married person basically = fidelity. Whatever.

Yes, chastity and celibacy are TWO different things in the Catholic Church. We are all called to chastity, only a few are called to celibacy.

[2xx1xy1JD]

How is it meaningful to take a vow of chastity when you are already married? Isn't that just taking a vow to follow the vows that you have already made?

Re poverty: Does Abigail indulge the kids, or just herself? I know they get fast food burgers, but that's hardly a real treat.

[NurseNell]

How is it meaningful to take a vow of chastity when you are already married? Isn't that just taking a vow to follow the vows that you have already made?

Re poverty: Does Abigail indulge the kids, or just herself? I know they get fast food burgers, but that's hardly a real treat.

One of the daughters, I think the future nun, takes dance lessons.