A Noble Calling Blog

[Guest Anonymous]

I spent quite a bit of time at home between undergraduate and postgraduate, because I was ill. I wasn't doing anything useful (working/looking for work/studying), I was just languishing. Doing nothing at home is not good training for life (though I have decided to claim my sick leave as a PhD in homemaking :lol:).

As for the list...

- cook/bake

- clean house

- learn how to sew, quilt, crochet, knit, etc.

- gardening

- menu planning

- learn how to care for children

- help with the homeschooling of younger siblings

- learn about grocery shopping and budgeting

- laundry and care for clothes, linens, etc.

- help with family business/ errands if necessary

- showing hospitality

- church activities

When I was fourteen I made a huge crochet blanket, and I had a huge basket of experimental crochet bits (Hellena??). Somehow, since then, I have completely forgotten how to crochet. Other than that, I've got the list covered.

My time off did help me improve my cooking but, other than that, this is the sort of stuff I learned as a young teenager.

[salsa]

I think sahd's are one or more of the following:

1) lazy, and looking for an excuse to sit around.

2) afraid of the outside world and looking for an excuse to remain sheltered,

3) drunk the kool aid and really do believe they're incapable of anything else

4) and the one that makes me saddest: pretended to drink the Kool Aid because not toeing the line means being abused.

[desertvixen]

There is nothing counter-cultural about dedicating your life to chores that the rest of us do in our spare time.

This. Not only that, but I would say most of us do them better.

[Buzzard]

This. Not only that, but I would say most of us do them better.

What fascinates me is the great divide between the secular world and these fucking looney tunes. We value education and experience while they seem to revel in the ability to sheild their children from as much as possible, thus preventing them from having any chance at having an opinion or escaping. Its like a fucked up version of victorian aristocracy where the women of means were expected to sit around all day drinking tea an chatting while teh menz worked. They didnt worry themselves with the "matters of men," and were nothing but pretty things - until we managed to learn to read and then demanded the right to vote, work etc.

What is this obsession with the past and why do these women think that the backward ways are better?

[FundieWatcher]

I decided to see what Libby was up to.

Nothing really new. I did appreciate the "Letting Go of the Duggars" post. She realizes it is sick that the older sisters raise the younger ones. And calls Jim out on his power trip and fake ministry. Based on her post " Thou Shall be Married by the Age of..." She is taking some heat from her homeschool community.

She is perfectly cute looking. She openly admits she is a casual dresser, not too into fashion. I just don't think the men are going to be after her based on her looks and blog alone. I hope that, somehow, is able to put herself out there as available to potential suitors. She seems to be reading plenty on being a Christian and homemaking, I imagine she still wants to get married. I worry for her, not much has changed over the years. Nothing is moving her forward.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VxGDGM6RRQY/VN2EvURiVvI/AAAAAAAAFHg/5mWJWDQn7gw/s1600/libbymccord2.png

[Georgiana]

The fundie marriage world is incredibly hypocritical. While they SAY that they want women who avoid calling attention to their physical appearance, the fundie women we see getting married are almost always very pretty. If they aren't naturally pretty, then they distract from that by spending time on their hair/skin/makeup.

The girls who snag a mate while not being naturally pretty or by spending time on their appearance do so by putting themselves out there. Getting involved in Church ministries. Working at Gothard HQ. Showing off their "skills".

Erin Bates, Jill Duggar, or Liz Munck might be able to snag a mate while being sequestered at home, but the truth is that those girls are VERY pretty. A guy can have to go through a lot of risk to get a fundie girl (talk to dad, be vetted, etc), and women who are just "cute enough" may not offer enough reward to get a guy to go after them.

Basically, this girl is looking at the dream life of gorgeous girls and having trouble pulling it off. Yes, this way of life works for fundie super-models, but it doesn't work for average Janes. I would love to live life like Kate Upton too, but let's be real, I don't have her looks so I can't.

[browngrl]

I find this one interesting. Apparently her father is not on board with her being a SAHD. Her mother and sister agree with her beliefs but the difference of opinion with her dad has caused some issues. She only mentioned this once and was quite discrete about it. I wonder how it goes for a daughter who wants to submit to her father(this sounds ruder than it is meant to be) and a dad who wants his daughter to do something else.

[DomWackTroll]

I love how she stops watching the Duggars because they're "in a cult," but goes on to recommend books by Scott Brown, Stacy McDonald, and Jasmine Baucham.

[BobTheWalrus]

how about a godly woman has a relationship with GOD? Slightly more important than baking.

YES. Thank you. This is my number one beef with this lifestyle. I don't care if you want to wear long skirts and bake everything from scratch and keep chickens in rural Arkansas, or whatever. It's the implication that doing those things = "being godly". The Bible says that followers of Jesus should be known by their love for one another, so that should be one major trait of a godly woman. Someone who has a relationship with God and attempts to humbly live her life according to what He asks. So genuinely caring for widows and orphans - God calls that acceptable worship. Examining yourself and taking the speck out of your own eye before judging others. Being loving and compassionate. Praying for those who oppose you; showing grace to those you disagree with. I could go on. If you can do that AND cross stitch, well and good. If you do that in your job as a lawyer or brain surgeon or artist or filing clerk or WHATEVER...it doesn't matter. It's true that the Bible does speak about caring for the home, and valuing children, but if you read the definition of a noble woman in Proverbs, she is a business woman, manager and landowner, making her own money and her own decisions, not just staying in her house pushing out baby after baby. And it says that she brings honour to her husband by what she does!

[bluehydrangea]

I find this one interesting. Apparently her father is not on board with her being a SAHD. Her mother and sister agree with her beliefs but the difference of opinion with her dad has caused some issues. She only mentioned this once and was quite discrete about it. I wonder how it goes for a daughter who wants to submit to her father(this sounds ruder than it is meant to be) and a dad who wants his daughter to do something else.

I agree, this girl is extra intriguing for the reasons you stated.

If you read her blog, it sounds like she had some kind of negative experience in public/private school before being pulled out and homeschooled. And from this, she determined that being a SAHD is what God desires her to be. In reality, I think it's what she desires to be because she is afraid of the real world and uses scripture to justify it. Holing up at home and doing nothing to better oneself (other than practicing chores) is not going to attract an eligible man, I'm afraid.

[FundieWatcher]

Her teeth are really stained. I wonder if she gets her teeth cleaned and dental check ups like you should. If she cleared up her ance, whitened her teeth, and cleaned up her brows, she would be very presentable. And I don't think those minor suggestions are too superficial. She has pretty, thick hair and beautiful eyes. A trip to Ulta could make a world of difference.

Her dad should at least insist on a compromise. He could say something like "Hey, I appreciate everything you do around here, how about looking into this part-time job at a daycare I saw advertised..."

Even if some trauma did happen, I think most people agree hiding away forever isn't healthy. I might leave a few suggestions one day for her.

[JaCrispy]

New blog from a SAHD

I love these lists.

Okay, as a working woman who is also a full time college student (one semester left and I'll be a college graduate-super excited about it too), I do almost everything on her list all the time or I already know how to do it (minus knitting and quilting, but I can crochet and I don't go to church.

anoblecallingblog.blogspot.com/

Ok So I found this crazy ass lady named Erika Shupe, and she's got 9 kids, she's a fundie too, however she's SUCH a control freak and scary she makes Michelle Duggar seem like a sweet cuddley kitten1

[PennySycamore]

JaCrispy, we've talked about Erika quite a bit here at FreeJinger. You might enjoy reading this thread about her decision to get a Shih tzu. It might make you mad too.

viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25061

[JaCrispy]

JaCrispy, we've talked about Erika quite a bit here at FreeJinger. You might enjoy reading this thread about her decision to get a Shih tzu. It might make you mad too.

viewtopic.php?f=8&t=25061

Wow you just made My day! I'm obsessed with how effed up this lady is! Thanks! Oh and regarding her getting another dog, that was a ludicrous decision on her part, being that she lives in a sardine can house with all those kids, and she already booted poor Mocha their former dog, for a newer one named "Happy" I'm sure this isn't going to end well! Thanks again for the link to the thread, I'm very intrigued. :cracking-up:

[Johanna25]

This blog makes me sad. As has been said, she seems a very nice girl, but without the looks or personality to attract a fundy guy to go out of his way to seek her out. If her father is less than enthusiastic about the project, he's not going to make any effort to get her a mate either. I see only sadness ahead of her. When are these girls going to learn that waiting for Prince Charming doesn't work? God helps those who help themselves. If I had wanted to marry and raise a family, I could have made some efforts and I'm sure I would have found someone suitable. I did not and didn't because that's not something I wanted, but it seems to be her only desire in life. If you want something you need to make some effort to bring it about. Maybe get a job, get involved with church or community groups, spruce yourself up, be out there so you have some opportunity to "meet cute."

[acheronbeach]

Honestly, what is with the focus on knitting/sewing? I mean, they're perfectly reasonable, fun hobbies, but where I live, sewing is NOT cheaper than buying clothing already made.

This girl is not going to attract a husband and that's clearly what she wants. I'm sorry, this is going to sound bitchy, but if she was going places where she was befriending guys (school, job), she'd have a chance. But she isn't. She's sitting around and home doing chores and blogging about it. She's got to attract them by - basically - her looks. She needs to do a little more than just roll out of bed.

[browngrl]

I have no problem with women who choose to be a homemaker - it is just as honourable a job as any other. However, I think that being a SAHD (or as I like to think of it SAHC (Stay At Home Child)) is the worst way to learn this skill set.

I learned the basics of many homemaking skills (e.g. budgeting, cooking, cleaning, simple home repair, simple sewing, simple car fixes etc) from my parents but I did not really learn anything until I had to do things on my own. Being independent forces you to step up to the plate or else things will fall apart.

If I was this young girl's parent (mom has drunk the koolaid - it is only dad that opposes staying at home) I would strongly encourage this girl to go out and get a job/go to school so that she has a chance of being able to take care of herself. I guess that is the real issue - these people don't want their children (more specifically the girls) to grow up, they want them as controllable as possible.

[defraudingjezebel]

I don't know- I don't get the sense that all SAHD are utterly lazy. Don't get me wrong- I'm sure that many of them are! But sometimes I think they choose this lifestyle because it allows them to be passive and not have to make any major choices in life. It protects them from the big, scary world out there (to some extent). I'm sure it is comforting for them to think that they are under the headship of someone else for their whole lives instead of having to venture out on their own and be forced to rely on themselves and their own decision-making.

Sure, they have the potential to choose how to decorate their home, how to dress, and what to cook for meals but those kinds of decisions are minor compared to career choices, going to school, or actively seeking out a life partner.

[acheronbeach]

I guess that is the real issue - these people don't want their children (more specifically the girls) to grow up, they want them as controllable as possible.

I get the sense that Libby is pushing this. After all, if the father is the head of the household, she has no Biblical authority to disobey him unless he's asking her to sin. And he's not, he's just telling her to get off her ass and do something other than blog about making cheddar cheese burritos and fried avocados. She doesn't like that, so she does what she pleases.

And I DO think that not being willing to go out and take the risks that normal people take is a form of laziness. Making choices is hard work. It's anxiety-laden, exhausting, and sometimes painful. These girls just don't want that. They want to coast through a simple-minded life, and foist their responsibilities on others.

[AnywhereButHere]

Honestly, what is with the focus on knitting/sewing? I mean, they're perfectly reasonable, fun hobbies, but where I live, sewing is NOT cheaper than buying clothing already made.

Seriously! I mean, I can sew a button back on, but for all else, I'm hitting up my neighborhood dry cleaners. At least that way our pants won't look like they've been re-hemmed by a blind squirrel. I actually would not mind learning how to crochet or knit. Both sound fun and relaxing (and like an excerise in Pictionary for people who would want to guess what I'm making - arts & crafts are not my strong point... :P ). Maybe one day!

Everyone, male and female should learn the basics of cooking and cleaning, gardening, car maintenance and general around the house handy stuff, and learn when best to call a professional (when your toilet bowl becomes Mt. Vesuvius is a good time - not that I'd know from experience or anything).

[Daenerys]

She says that she doesn't believe in courtship, and then goes on to describe a relationship setting that is pretty much exactly the same as courtship: anoblecallingblog.blogspot.co.uk/2014/08/series-for-week-my-thoughts-on.html

Whatever she calls it, she won't experience it if she keeps sitting at home waiting for a guy to come along. She'll end up like the Seven Sisters, only a slightly less insane.

[warriorblade8857]

Which post mentioned that her dad's not on board with the SAHD lifestyle? I want to read it, but I'm having a little trouble finding it.

[Hane]

I don't know- I don't get the sense that all SAHD are utterly lazy. Don't get me wrong- I'm sure that many of them are! But sometimes I think they choose this lifestyle because it allows them to be passive and not have to make any major choices in life. It protects them from the big, scary world out there (to some extent). I'm sure it is comforting for them to think that they are under the headship of someone else for their whole lives instead of having to venture out on their own and be forced to rely on themselves and their own decision-making.

Sure, they have the potential to choose how to decorate their home, how to dress, and what to cook for meals but those kinds of decisions are minor compared to career choices, going to school, or actively seeking out a life partner.

Exactly. I feel the same way about many of the SAHMs we follow here, and even a few I've known in real life. I speak from experience: I got married at 20, when my husband and I were still in college. Although I worked, much of my work was temporary or parttime, and he was the primary wage earner. I had never lived on my own or supported myself, and found the idea intimidating.

If I hadn't wound up getting divorced at 27, with a year-old baby, and being forced to get the hell out there and learn how to take care of myself and my child, I might have been another of these SAHMs who made a career of never leaving her comfort zone. I fully believe that one rarely gets to be a full-fledged adult without the ability to support oneself.

[acheronbeach]

Miss Libby has a new blog... elizabethmaryblog94.blogspot.com

Looks like more of the same... Mistaking mascarpone for clotted cream (yep, there's that excellent homemaking education) and posting a weekly goal list (spoiler... It's mostly blogging).

[salex]

Miss Libby has a new blog... elizabethmaryblog94.blogspot.com

Looks like more of the same... Mistaking mascarpone for clotted cream (yep, there's that excellent homemaking education) and posting a weekly goal list (spoiler... It's mostly blogging).

OK, her task list is filled with makework shit (seriously--

Switch bedding over to spring/summer

is nothing more than "change sheets and comforter, put old bedding in hamper."

But what is this crap?

She scheduled time on her list to make this cover. :lol:

elizabethmaryblog94.blogspot.com/2015/01/diy-blogging-planner_19.html

Shouldn't most of this "book" be on files on her computer? She's a blogger. How does it make sense to have a list of blog links and quotes written out by hand in a notebook when it could be in a computer file.

But, I guess pasting crap on paper is more time consuming than hitting save, so if you have to create makework things to fill your time, this is just the thing!