File Under: When you thought Lori couldn't be any crueler...

[lilwriter85]

I just looked through Ken's site. I see he has a masters of divinity. I'm surprised that he isn't running his own asshole preaching blog like the PP does.

[wildrose]

Just as a tangent: what would you do with a child that literally only ate five or six foods? My little godson will only eat chicken nuggets, the top bits off boiled broccoli, french fries, and plain cheese pizza. He'll eat junk food too - cake, cookies, candy, chips, cheesies, koolaid, freezies. He won't drink milk, no cheese, no butter, no yogurt or similar-looking food, no plain meat, no burgers, no rice, no beans, no boiled/mashed spuds, no peanut butter, no nuts, and no veg or fruit.

He screams bloody murder if presented with food that isn't on his list. What do you do with a child like that to try and get them to eat?

Coming in late to this discussion, but part of my daughter's job as a speech and language pathologist for pre-schoolers is working with children who eat less than 15 different foods. This program is offered through Public Health after a referral from a doctor. I live in Canada, so it may not be the same where you live. I would never have known about this if she had not mentioned it, so perhaps it would be something to check out.

[latraviata]

I don't know of the book, but I agree with what you are saying. I think adults as a general rule have a very difficult time gauging how much food a child actually needs, so they end up putting way too much on their plates and then getting frustrated when the poor kid can't eat it all. I think it's much easier to start small and let them help themselves to more as they want it. I also agree that making them take a certain number of bites or clear their plate is a bad idea. A child is able to know when they are comfortable and shouldn't be forced to eat past that point. Food can always be wrapped up and refrigerated if you feel they might get hungry later.

We don't do the withholding dessert thing either. If we're having dessert, then everyone is having dessert. I refuse to make an issue out of food. The flip side of that is that I don't keep cookies or sweets in the house as a general rule. Maybe once every 2 weeks we will pick a sweet to bring home or I will let the kids pick a candy at check out. I do keep ice lollies as my daughter calls them (popsicles) in the fridge during the hotter months and hand them out when we go outdoors.

That is exactly my point.

Dessert is part of the meal, witholding is as far as I am concerned not an option.

And their is a huge difference between pickyness and absolute refusal to eat.

In the latter, go see a pediatrician first.

[latraviata]

[*]As a general rule, kids need a lot less food than we think they do and they would really benefit from adults relaxing about it. He is, of course, very much against force feeding of any kind but also against "gentler" methods like making kids take a certain number of bites, withholding dessert or other foods unless they finish a certain thing etc.

This!

Exactly what I said in my first comment.

Keeping it pleasant at the table is the best stimulant for a child to eat.

[latraviata]

Can someone post a link to her Facebook page? Thx!

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Always-Le ... 1696710545

My comments are still there. I posted the comments last night (European time)

[Kitchen Princess]

Coming in late to this discussion, but part of my daughter's job as a speech and language pathologist for pre-schoolers is working with children who eat less than 15 different foods. This program is offered through Public Health after a referral from a doctor. I live in Canada, so it may not be the same where you live. I would never have known about this if she had not mentioned it, so perhaps it would be something to check out.

Um, eating less than 15 foods is NOT in itself a reason for a child to see a speech therapist. Way to be alarmist. Sheesh.

[latraviata]

Um, eating less than 15 foods is NOT in itself a reason for a child to see a speech therapist. Way to be alarmist. Sheesh.

Sounds a bit over the top.......and I can't make the connection between the 15 foods and speech, little do I know...... :(

[Triplet3]

I'm surprised quite a few people in this thread are saying that dessert isn't a normal, everyday part of dinner. Maybe things are different across the Atlantic? In my family we always have a pudding course, without fail. Admittedly Monday-Thursday it's usually just a yoghurt or portion of ready-made trifle or similar, but at weekends we always have 'proper' homemade puddings such as crumble. Fresh fruit is an extra, eaten after pudding if desired. In fact when I was a child, fruit was practically a separate course in itself! It's interesting how dining customs vary across the world. :)

[Koala]

It's interesting how dining customs vary across the world. :)

I agree. We rarely have desserts. Only on special occasions or treats.

[OkToBeTakei]

Um, eating less than 15 foods is NOT in itself a reason for a child to see a speech therapist. Way to be alarmist. Sheesh.

I can't see where the poster said eating less than 15 foods would be a reason for a referral, just that it was a remit of Speech therapy, which it is. For many reasons.

Also late to the discussion.

It always amazes me when the only thing a child will eat is chicken nuggets, fries, ice-cream etc. That is what most children would choose to eat if given the choice. I do not believe in force-feeding it is disgusting.

My child has never been allowed to say she does not like something before she has tried it. I have never her MADE her try it if she does not wish to, she is just not allowed to say it. I also think there is in recent years a huge difference in what we feed or appears to be a 'social' norm of what we feed our children. Chicken nuggets were not available when I was growing up, child friendly menus in restaurants were a rarity. Supermarkets package and advertisers advertise child friendly food, this creates an attraction for the child and an attitude of 'OH this is child food.'

When I weaned my child I whacked everything in a food processor that we ate (greek salad ..don't try it.) Baby food? In a jar? No thanks. Too expensive amongs many other things. Is she an amazingly diverse eater? Not too bad. She, like every individual has her likes and dislikes and downright gags on mushrooms. I am sure she would eat Chicken nuggets every day if she could. I do make a point of saying that every meal she eats does not have to be something she 'Loves' There are food groups that are necessary for growth, health that we all need to tolerate instead of a bar of chocolate. There are fun ways to ensure this as many posters have said.

My own Mother was 'one sprout on your plate coaxing type' We found ways around it. She kept at it. She also fed my child a 'Chocolate Orange' for lunch one day. Way to milk the 'I LOVE Nana' Haha.

[mirele]

Someone was asking where Lori lives. . .

She lives in San Diego. Her husband is a consultant to orthodontists, and here is his contact information:

http://www.kenalexander.com/contact.html

Ken's address is listed as Carlsbad, which is a city in or outside of San Diego. I don't know if that's his home or office address though.

Ryan (the forcefeeder) works for his father, so he must live in that area also.

Millennium is spelled wrong. (MilleNium)

The address given at the bottom of the page is that of a residence, not an office. It's a five-bedroom, 3500 square foot house (thanks Google and Zillow). Of course, that site is from 2008, so there's no idea if they've moved since then.

[Spider Burps]

It's interesting how many people eat dessert daily! As a kid, we only had dessert on birthdays. In my house now, we usually eat dessert once a week, so it tends to be something more elaborate than "just" cupcakes or whatever (think: Thomas Keller's lemon bars, souffles, homemade pain au chocolat, etc.). I recently got an ice cream maker, though, so we've been eating ice cream for dessert every night for the last couple of weeks--you know, to develop recipes. :lol:

[latraviata]

I'm surprised quite a few people in this thread are saying that dessert isn't a normal, everyday part of dinner. Maybe things are different across the Atlantic? In my family we always have a pudding course, without fail. Admittedly Monday-Thursday it's usually just a yoghurt or portion of ready-made trifle or similar, but at weekends we always have 'proper' homemade puddings such as crumble. Fresh fruit is an extra, eaten after pudding if desired. In fact when I was a child, fruit was practically a separate course in itself! It's interesting how dining customs vary across the world. :)

Same here.

[Hane]

Thanks, latraviata!

I just posted this on her FB page:

Like you, I'm a grandmother, so I assume we're about the same age. Unlike you, however, I would never presume to "teach" young women how to conduct their sexual lives--unless these young women were being abused (physically or emotionally) or exploited. I cringe at the thought of expecting my adult daughter to be her husband's at-will sex receptacle.

And it will be deleted in 3, 2, 1...

[lilwriter85]

Thanks, latraviata!

I just posted this on her FB page:

And it will be deleted in 3, 2, 1...

I just your comment and the comments from latraviata. I love them all. I think Lori tries to be a "know it all" who thinks she can give advice to any woman. The thing is that she doesn't see the various factors and issues that affect young women. Lori's advice to women in recent posts is disgusting and is demeaning to women. I wonder about her age. I don't think she is in her 60s. My mother is 61 and she would never to try to teach young women about how to conduct their sex lives.

I think Lori is too sheltered and she probably does think deepy about certain issues. I bet if her daughter was being abused by her husband, she would probably defend the husband and then tell her daughter that she didn't serve her husband the right way.

[Hane]

Thanks, lilwriter85!

Seconds after I posted on Lori's Facebook page, my daughter gave it a "Like" and a "Thanks, Mom!" Timing!

I sent her an IM:

The Facebook page "Always Learning" belongs to a bitter fundamentalist shrew who believes in the subjugation of women and children.

Her response: "What is WRONG with people?"

[latraviata]

When I weaned my child I whacked everything in a food processor that we ate (greek salad ..don't try it.) Baby food? In a jar? No thanks. Too expensive amongs many other things. Is she an amazingly diverse eater? Not too bad. She, like every individual has her likes and dislikes and downright gags on mushrooms. I am sure she would eat Chicken nuggets every day if she could. I do make a point of saying that every meal she eats does not have to be something she 'Loves' There are food groups that are necessary for growth, health that we all need to tolerate instead of a bar of chocolate. There are fun ways to ensure this as many posters have said.

My own Mother was 'one sprout on your plate coaxing type' We found ways around it. She kept at it. She also fed my child a 'Chocolate Orange' for lunch one day. Way to milk the 'I LOVE Nana' Haha.

I did exactly the same, honestly not to boast about it, I never bought/used a jar of baby food, I always pureed, mashed their food either in a blender or with a fork when they got a bit older.

Grandmama was an entirely different chapter, she fed my children and the other grandchildren cake or chocolate when they didn't eat enough or refused to eat.

But that is grandmother's prerogative, that is what grandmothers are for, their wish was her command and we parents (her children) were absoluteluy fine with that!

[gingernut]

As far as a child who eats less than 15 foods, that is typical for a child with autism or aspergers. My son has only a few foods he will eat and we have to work with him on this issue.

[latraviata]

Thanks, lilwriter85!

Seconds after I posted on Lori's Facebook page, my daughter gave it a "Like" and a "Thanks, Mom!" Timing!

I sent her an IM:

Her response: "What is WRONG with people?"

I gave you the 'like' as well!! :clap: :clap:

[Hane]

I did the same! I only bought jars of baby food when my daughter was 7.5 months old and we took a trip to a YWCA convention in Texas.

I kept sugary breakfast cereal out of the house, but learned, years later, that my daughter had it most mornings at her grandparents' (my folks took care of her before and after school while I was at work). When she was littler, though, lunch with Grandma consisted of homemade soup and fresh vegetables from Grandpa's garden. Oh, and I told her always to choose plain milk for her school lunch--and she recently told me she always got chocolate milk. Somehow, she survived and is a productive member of society. ;)

[lilwriter85]

Hane, I just saw your daughter's "Like" and "Thanks Mom". That is very sweet. I'm looking through that the "Always Preaching Learning" FB page and it mostly Lori's dumbass fangirls praising her. Lori's fangirls basically have the same fucked up views as her. If I showed that FB page and Lori's blog to my mom and several of my female relatives and friends, they would be disgusted with the some of the shit Lori and her fangirls believe in. My mom would probably call Lori an asshole for her "teaching and mentoring" methods. I also know men that would find Lori to be an asshole because of her "advice" and the other shit she talks about. I showed my boyfriend some of Lori's postings and he thinks she is a moron. I remember after Lori's blog posting about stay at home dads, a couple of stay at home dads left comments. I'm glad those men stood up to her. I think Lori's dumb ass advice and attitude will backfire on her at some point.

This is a bit OT, but I sometimes lurk on the Get Off My Internets(GOMI) forum. I was lurking on the GOMI thread that is devoted to Mormon bloggers C.Jane Kendrick and Stephanie Nielsen. Several days ago, there was one poster who said that certain things about the LDS church appealed to her and that she liked how Mormons seem to be a close knit". One man responded indirectly to her and said that he found nothing inspiring or uplifting about the LDS church and thatone of the things he didn't like about the church was the sexism and the treatment of women. I love when men stand up for things like that.

[latraviata]

Thanks, latraviata!

I just posted this on her FB page:

And it will be deleted in 3, 2, 1...

I particularly liked this one!

And thank you!

[latraviata]

I did the same! I only bought jars of baby food when my daughter was 7.5 months old and we took a trip to a YWCA convention in Texas.

I kept sugary breakfast cereal out of the house, but learned, years later, that my daughter had it most mornings at her grandparents' (my folks took care of her before and after school while I was at work). When she was littler, though, lunch with Grandma consisted of homemade soup and fresh vegetables from Grandpa's garden. Oh, and I told her always to choose plain milk for her school lunch--and she recently told me she always got chocolate milk. Somehow, she survived and is a productive member of society. ;)

That is grand, my situation was almost identical. The grandparents, the chocolate milk instead of the plain milk.

Children and grandparents that is really universal, they are all the same all over the world.

[latraviata]

As far as a child who eats less than 15 foods, that is typical for a child with autism or aspergers. My son has only a few foods he will eat and we have to work with him on this issue.

Is it really? I have to look into my ' professional literature'

[latraviata]

Hane, I just saw your daughter's "Like" and "Thanks Mom". That is very sweet. I'm looking through that the "Always Preaching Learning" FB page and it mostly Lori's dumbass fangirls praising her. Lori's fangirls basically have the same fucked up views as her. If I showed that FB page and Lori's blog to my mom and several of my female relatives and friends, they would be disgusted with the some of the shit Lori and her fangirls believe in. My mom would probably call Lori an asshole for her "teaching and mentoring" methods. I also know men that would find Lori to be an asshole because of her "advice" and the other shit she talks about. I showed my boyfriend some of Lori's postings and he thinks she is a moron. I remember after Lori's blog posting about stay at home dads, a couple of stay at home dads left comments. I'm glad those men stood up to her. I think Lori's dumb ass advice and attitude will backfire on her at some point.

This is a bit OT, but I sometimes lurk on the Get Off My Internets(GOMI) forum. I was lurking on the GOMI thread that is devoted to Mormon bloggers C.Jane Kendrick and Stephanie Nielsen. Several days ago, there was one poster who said that certain things about the LDS church appealed to her and that she liked how Mormons seem to be a close knit". One man responded indirectly to her and said that he found nothing inspiring or uplifting about the LDS church and thatone of the things he didn't like about the church was the sexism and the treatment of women. I love when men stand up for things like that.

What I find alarming about this people is , the crueler the methods of education/ childrearing the more they seem to appriciate and even enjoy it. Very disturbing.