camdendayton

Fundy-lite FB friend: no bikini for my 4-year old

127 posts in this topic

I have a facebook friend from HS who was always kinda fundy-lite. Apparently his family (he is married now) is heading quickly in the fundy direction. They already have 2 bio-kids, and our favorite fundy-accessorie, an adopted girl, complete with adoption blog, after 4 and a half years of trying to "grow their family." Now they are going the Lockwood family route and heading to Mexico for some missionary work. His FB post from this morning reads,

So my four old daughter got upset today because we told her she couldnt wear a bikini...It starts so young!
Because we all know a 4 year-old wearing a 2 piece suit is a travesty to god. Uck...

I always wondered how this guy put up with the high school team that I know him from. We were quite the sinners! :naughty:

ETA: responses

From his mom:

And you are going to have this x3! Tell her princesses don't wear bikinis.

And someone else:

Oh my!! Yes no bikinis here either!!!

:whistle:

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I have a facebook friend from HS who was always kinda fundy-lite. Apparently his family (he is married now) is heading quickly in the fundy direction. They already have 2 bio-kids, and our favorite fundy-accessorie, an adopted girl, complete with adoption blog, after 4 and a half years of trying to "grow their family." Now they are going the Lockwood family route and heading to Mexico for some missionary work. His FB post from this morning reads, Because we all know a 4 year-old wearing a 2 piece suit is a travesty to god. Uck...

I always wondered how this guy put up with the high school team that I know him from. We were quite the sinners! :naughty:

ETA: responses

From his mom:

And someone else:

:whistle:

I can't imagine how hard it to go to the bathroom in a wet bathing suit when your four. At least let her have at modest tikini!

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The only thing I dislike about four-year-olds wearing bikinis is that they don't need the top half at all and yet the designers have decided that their nipples have to be covered when they don't even have breasts. I don't have an issue with it from a modesty angle...I think it's a bit messed up when people talk about their four-year-olds having to be modest, ironically they are sexualising them more.

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I can't imagine how hard it to go to the bathroom in a wet bathing suit when your four. At least let her have at modest tikini!

Not just 4-year-olds. I always opt for the tankini and this is one of the reasons :)

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Not just 4-year-olds. I always opt for the tankini and this is one of the reasons :)

This.

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Why not? Let her have whatever will be comfortable and easiest for her. I personally like the idea of a tankini, anything that will be easy for her to use the restroom.

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We are not fundie, lite or otherwise, but we do not allow our 4 year old daughter to wear bikinis. Has nothing to do with modesty, though we find it weird, like someone said above, 4 year olds need a bra top. Mostly it's for sun protection. We all are fairly light skinned, so we all wear UV shirts and swim shorts. That's really the only reason. Though it does make bathroom trips easier!

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I wonder what these people would say about a 4 year old wearing a bikini because the bare stomach gives easy access to her g-tube for feeding. Sure it kept her alive, but at the cost of modesty!

I remember Kate Gosselin talking about how she wouldn't put her 8 in skimpy clothes because she believed in modesty. This was years before she appeared on magazine covers in a bikini herself.

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Why not? Let her have whatever will be comfortable and easiest for her. I personally like the idea of a tankini, anything that will be easy for her to use the restroom.

I'm sure they'll be some beach pics forthcoming. I'll look forward to seeing what kind of suits the girls end up with. Now that I've thought for a second this is especially funny to me since most of my memories of him involve speedos (it was a swim team we were on!)

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No bikinis here for my 6 year old. Just my preference. I don't care what you choose to do on this, but for my family it works.

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We are not fundie, lite or otherwise, but we do not allow our 4 year old daughter to wear bikinis. Has nothing to do with modesty, though we find it weird, like someone said above, 4 year olds need a bra top. Mostly it's for sun protection. We all are fairly light skinned, so we all wear UV shirts and swim shorts. That's really the only reason. Though it does make bathroom trips easier!

We feel the same way. I wasn't allowed to wear a bikini until I was 12 or 13 or something and I just find bikinis on little girls weird. But the two-piece part is much better for potty training time in particular. My sister always said she'd never have bikinis for her daughter until she had twins potty training the summer last year :lol: If it wasn't for my fear of skin cancer I'd just slap little speedo bottoms on them and call it done. That's what the little European kids in my neighborhood did and it was adorable. Like the Coppertone baby :) But I will probably use the UV rated swim shirts when I have kids--on the boys and the girls.

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I wonder what these people would say about a 4 year old wearing a bikini because the bare stomach gives easy access to her g-tube for feeding. Sure it kept her alive, but at the cost of modesty!

I'd still use a tankini, as it would keep the Mic-Key or button a little more protected.

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We feel the same way. I wasn't allowed to wear a bikini until I was 12 or 13 or something and I just find bikinis on little girls weird. But the two-piece part is much better for potty training time in particular. My sister always said she'd never have bikinis for her daughter until she had twins potty training the summer last year :lol: If it wasn't for my fear of skin cancer I'd just slap little speedo bottoms on them and call it done. That's what the little European kids in my neighborhood did and it was adorable. Like the Coppertone baby :) But I will probably use the UV rated swim shirts when I have kids--on the boys and the girls.

FWIW, I'm not saying that little kids should wear bikinis, or that there aren't legitimate reasons for them not to. I took the "it starts so young part" and the "princesses don't wear bikinis" as a pretty clear indication that it's a modesty thing.

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If I have children I will probably just let them run around in bikini bottoms, boys and girls. It's crazy to say a little girl needs to cover a flat chest when she isn't developing (if there were sun protection issues then I'd get them something with more material, but that's got nothing to do with modesty!)

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I took the "it starts so young part" and the "princesses don't wear bikinis" as a pretty clear indication that it's a modesty thing.

What the hell do princesses wear then? WholesomeWear? Yeah, like a princess would be caught dead in one of those monstrosities. ;)

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I'm sure they'll be some beach pics forthcoming. I'll look forward to seeing what kind of suits the girls end up with. Now that I've thought for a second this is especially funny to me since most of my memories of him involve speedos (it was a swim team we were on!)

The latest for boys on swim teams are the knee length speedos, much less revealing. I swear the skimpy speedos were the reason my sons and their friends quit competitive swimming by age 12 or so. A lot of girls are wearing the knee length suits too, and some the suits that cover neck to ankle. They are so expensive, I would love one, they are supposed to really cut the drag.

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We've always worn shorts and teeshirts because we're so pale we practically glow. I managed to get sunburnt in Costa Rica wearing leggings and a teeshirt and slathering myself in SPF 60 every fifteen minutes. I was a hurting puppy.

I don't agree with kids in bikini tops because it sexualizes them at an early age. Girls and boys are virtually identical up top until puberty, so until then (or until the kid feels uncomfortable), gendered swimsuits are silly. Everyone runs away barechested, or everyone runs around with a teeshirt on, whatever, don't care, but don't pin it on the kid like that.

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:lol: I think they won't like Mexico's beaches then. Topless/nude beaches are pretty common there.

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I think if I had kids I'd go for a swim shirt, for sun issues. If modesty is the only concern, hell, just a bottom or a tankini. Last year I bought a one-piece for myself (first time since I was 12) and oh God, I forget how gross it is get a wet one back on after you've taken it off to pee.

The only reason I would prefer tankinis to bikinis is that bikinis look weird to me when there are no breasts at all (and little girls tend to have straight bodies/round tummies, too). There's nothing to really keep it in place, seems like it would be more of a hindrance than anything.

Personally, I find bikini bottoms much more comfortable than shorts, though, so I would probably default to those for a girl, unless she showed a preference for shorts.

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The latest for boys on swim teams are the knee length speedos, much less revealing. I swear the skimpy speedos were the reason my sons and their friends quit competitive swimming by age 12 or so. A lot of girls are wearing the knee length suits too, and some the suits that cover neck to ankle. They are so expensive, I would love one, they are supposed to really cut the drag.

This was before the knee length speedos were common. If anyone wore them it was only for the big, end of season meets.

OT on competitive swimwear: Actually for national/international competitions and what not the suits past the knee, and anything above the waist for boys are now against the rules. I assume this is true for almost all levels as the swimming community is pretty constant with their rules. I think it's stupid for things like the Olympics where Speedo gave suits to any swimmer that wanted one, but it makes sense for age-group competition to avoid an "arms race" for faster suits among parents. Don't get me started on this topic, I like to say my family converted from Catholicism to competitive swimming when I was about 9 b/c I stopped going to CCD when it conflicted with swim practice. But those suits do feel amazing, I'd love to get to wear one too, if I had some money to burn.

8-)

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If Thing# 2 is a girl, there won't be any bikinis BUT for completely non modesty related reasons.

I am a combination of Irish and Czech and am SUPER CRAZY pale. Thing #1 is super pale too. My husband's family has a history of cancer.

My girls will just like my son does, wear the board shorts or boy short bottoms and the surfer shirt. THe last thing I want is for my kid to develop melanoma!!!

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FWIW, I'm not saying that little kids should wear bikinis, or that there aren't legitimate reasons for them not to. I took the "it starts so young part" and the "princesses don't wear bikinis" as a pretty clear indication that it's a modesty thing.

I'm sorry. I didnt mean to imply you were saying that. I was mostly replying to the other posts about little girls and bikini tops, and just giving my experience. I did find the bit about princesses weird. What the heck are Princess Jasmine and Princess Ariel wearing, then?? But maybe they're the type to not do Disney...

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:lol: I think they won't like Mexico's beaches then. Topless/nude beaches are pretty common there.
This is going to sound weird but topless is less sexualizing that a bikini, especially on small children. We're a no bikini family and we're not even fundy-lite. I don't have the body for it anymore. And it's too sexy for kids. That and we're all so fair skinned, we've all gone the swim shirt and board shorts just to cut down on how much sunscreen we have to buy or aloe if we forget. ;)
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I'm sorry. I didnt mean to imply you were saying that. I was mostly replying to the other posts about little girls and bikini tops, and just giving my experience. I did find the bit about princesses weird. What the heck are Princess Jasmine and Princess Ariel wearing, then?? But maybe they're the type to not do Disney...

You don't need to say you're sorry. I guess I should have made that a general reply. Not sure whether or not they do Disney.

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No bikinis here for my 6 year old. Just my preference. I don't care what you choose to do on this, but for my family it works.

Is this for modesty or other reasons?

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