Meredith is coming! Meredith is coming!

[SweetTexasCrude]

Mama Alexander said on her blog that Meredith is coming to visit in 20 days! Hopefully we'll get the update we've patiently waited for. No mention of a pregnancy, which makes me think she isn't preggo. I have a hard time believing that future President Stephen would censor his mother in law's announcement of her first grandchild.

[silvia]

I _think_ she looks pregnant in her Facebook profile pic, which is publicly viewable: http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/meredithivy

[Koala]

She is pregnant isn't she?

[Lady Elaine]

Slightly OT, if you look at her brother Elliot's facebook pic, it appears he is keeping the 6 inch rule with his sweetie.

And she is pregnant, due in fall with a girl. She's going to name her Margaret. (I think this info was gathered from comments she's left on other people's blogs.)

[SweetTexasCrude]

I agree that she looks preggo and we had reliable info that she was...still odd that her mom wouldn't mention it in her big update post. FJers, care to speculate?

[bionicmlle]

Whose blogs does she read/comment on?

[anniebgood]

She's still hanging on to him for dear life....as if she's afraid he's going to run off on her. I wish her the best. I still think he's a stinker in disguise.

[ladypuglover]

One by land, 2 if by sea.

[Milly-Molly-Mandy]

Um so who is she and why is she interesting?

Obviously not a Brit. My bf went to Oxford and no one writes Oxford, Oxfordshire just Oxford, UK

[sea_gale]

I wonder how she's finding Oxford? It's a conservative place by British standards, but I imagine she would find it shockingly librul.

[contrary]

Um so who is she and why is she interesting?

she's sort of fundie-lite, and has fabulous taste. she kept a very visually pretty blog before she got married, at strivingtoserveathome.blogspot.com/

i don't agree with her much, but i liked looking at her pictures.

now, she's married and moved to oxford with her husband, who is studying there, or got a job there...i forget which. she stopped blogging once she met her goal of marriage.

[Guest Anonymous]

I wouldn't call Meredith "fundie-light." She is pretty conservative in that she believes a woman should stay at home under her father's authority until "the transfer of authority" to her husband. And she doesn't beleive in birth control, I don't think. I think her only bit of liberalism is that she will wear pants when performing back-breaking physical labor.

Her husband is studying at Oxford on a Rhodes Scholarship. I am still stunned (and somewhat frightened) that someone bright and well-educated enough to earn a Rhodes would buy into a hyper-patriarchal belief system

[fundiefan]

I have never been a Meredith fan and am even less of a fan of her family. I can't believe her mom was thrown into such a tizzy when Meredith left home. That is the flip side of the daughter's at home crap and one of its very negative aspects; everyone relies on that grown daughter to fulfill their needs and then if that daughter is lucky enough to get out, the family can't function. Not only does everything about their daily lives change, they get deeply depressed and obsess about the daughter that finally left home. I see this happening to the Maxwell's to much, much greater levels, if poor Sarah ever gets a chance at life.

If your life is turned upside down to such an extent when an adult child leaves home (as all children are meant to do eventually; that IS the point of raising children) then you probably need to do some pretty deep examination of the life you're living and the choices you're making.

The mom's writing also grates on my nerves. Nails on a chalkboard kind of nerve grating. She is not good at writing, at all. She often sounds like a twelve year old girl.

Shouldn't there be a wedding announcement soon? It's been two months since the son stood up in church and told the world he was courting some chick. (What was with that? Standing up and announcing to the world that you're dating/courting/whatever? These people are just beyond weird, really). Two months is kind of lengthy as far as fundie courtship goes, isn't it?

[silvia]

That is the flip side of the daughter's at home crap and one of its very negative aspects; everyone relies on that grown daughter to fulfill their needs and then if that daughter is lucky enough to get out, the family can't function.

Exactly--that's why the Botkinettes (and older Duggarettes) are stuck in their current holding pattern.

[failsafe]

I wonder how she's finding Oxford? It's a conservative place by British standards, but I imagine she would find it shockingly librul.

I really hope she is enjoying it. Not very many fundies in England - and I'm not surprised she got pregnant so quickly, but I hope she has taken time to explore and is broadening her world view a bit. I fully admit to being a Meredith apologist, however, and it's entirely possible she's handing out tracts and soul winning and going on about how women are unfit to do anything.

Her husband is studying at Oxford on a Rhodes Scholarship. I am still stunned (and somewhat frightened) that someone bright and well-educated enough to earn a Rhodes would buy into a hyper-patriarchal belief system

I think this is the most interesting part of Meredith's story. On the one hand, it's a fundie fairy tale - SAHD who is getting a bit long in the tooth (I believe she was 22 when she got married?) writes a blog in a thinly veiled effort to get her name out there and comfort herself. Random college kid is surfing the web, finds said blog and emails her. She emails back and says she isn't comfortable communicating without Dad's permission, so he emails Dad. He visits for two weeks and BOOM, engagement. That he is a salutatorian at Princeton, ROTC and Rhodes scholar just makes it all the more romantic for fundie maidens. His pedigree catapulted the Alexanders so that they're now rubbing shoulders with fundie royalty and her story is basically held up as the ultimate success of the SAHD movement.

For those removed from the lifestyle, it's even more fascinating. Not only is Stephen clearly a bright guy with (likely) high ambitions, but he grew up Unitarian Universalist and seemingly only became intrigued by fundamentalism in college - and even then, very intellectually based Calvinism, at that. With so many very well reasoned religious arguments about KJV only/skirts only/SAHDs I'm surprised he bought into it - honestly, most men in the movement don't seem too smart. That he must have been surrounded by smart, well-educated women at Princeton, and that his mother is well educated herself is even more fascinating. I wonder what she must think of this whole thing.

For me personally, it makes me suspicious that he will be able to hold to (some) fundie hardlines like no college for women. For one thing, he must have seen by now that college for women isn't all bad, for another, politically it's not advantageous and he does seem to be grooming his life for an eventual world domination type of career. I hold out hope that both will mellow as they age, especially Stephen who seems to still be in a hyper-committed "new believer" stage and mellow to fundie-light. I don't think they're there now, however. I'm still hoping having a daughter will make a feminist out of him - in any case it won't look good for him as a politician if his kids don't go to college at all, even religious ones.

[ppmath]

I speculate (as I'm sure many others do), that Stephen's inexplicable attraction to Meredith via her blog stems from one of two reasons:

1. For his future political career, he wanted someone young, pretty, hardworking, reasonably intelligent, and with a pristine past. Someone he could mold into the perfect political wife.

2. Same as 1, only darker. In addition to those things, he wanted a woman who was submissive and who he could control. All those independant smart Princeton and Oxford women scared the crap out of him.

But because I think Meredith deserves better, I am hoping it's neither of those. I hope he saw a lovely girl and fell in love with her and will make her happy all the days of her life, along with freeing her from some of the more scary and non-Biblical/Christian aspects of her upbringing.

[GenerationCedarchip]

Even in fundie-dom, that one is still pretty controversial. There's a pretty decent-sized camp of people out there who still want their girls to get an education if for no other reason than to make sure the next generation gets good teaching at home. And there are still plenty of fundies going to college. I know some folks from Patrick Henry College and from Geneva College and from what I gather, skirmishes between the fundies and the fundie-lights are pretty commonplace.

Interestingly, one of the bones of contention is over graduate education. Among fundie-lights, it's not all that unheard of for women to get graduate degrees in various things, especially counseling, education and various health professions. I've even met a few lawyers who are plan to practice only until children come along. However, among the fundies, college for women is seen as a good idea but graduate school is seen as financially irresponsible and if you're married, downright ungodly.

All that being said, I googled Stephen and I have to wonder if he's even really settled into who he wants to be for the rest of his life. I knew guys somewhat like him in college who converted to fundie or fundie-lite beliefs and then later in their 20s, went through a whole lot of changes spiritually. I just hope that if this happens, Meredith(and their future child) doesn't get left out in the cold.

[failsafe]

1. For his future political career, he wanted someone young, pretty, hardworking, reasonably intelligent, and with a pristine past. Someone he could mold into the perfect political wife.

What I wonder about this is why he didn't do what most other political aspirants do: find a sweet sorority girl from Texas or Alabama from a reasonably well-off family. Laura Bush, Barbara Bush, Nancy Reagan, Anna Romney, etc all at least started college. What many have in common is a strong pedigree - from the "right" families, etc. Not every college-educated woman turns into Hillary Clinton (unfortunately!). Many become just excellent politician's wives, so one with high aspirations doesn't need to go to the SAHDs to find a good wife - a fundie-lite sorority girl from Wellesley or SMU could do the job just as well.

All that being said, I googled Stephen and I have to wonder if he's even really settled into who he wants to be for the rest of his life. I knew guys somewhat like him in college who converted to fundie or fundie-lite beliefs and then later in their 20s, went through a whole lot of changes spiritually. I just hope that if this happens, Meredith(and their future child) doesn't get left out in the cold.

I know, I am hoping he is still in new believer zealotry and he will mellow out a bit (but not so much that he leaves Meredith and their kids out in the cold, of course!) What I really hope was he was just an awkward guy, very much intellectually and spiritually passionate about his new religion, and stumbled across Meredith's blog. I hope he liked her for all the reasons I suspect many of us do - she seems genuinely sweet and smart, if naive, hardworking and caring and like a fundamentally good person, though perhaps one that doesn't realize the far-reaching negative consequences some of her beliefs can have. I hope that because he was awkward, he was somewhat aware that this was probably the best he was gonna get (and let's face it, if you're gonna have a stay at home wife, I bet Meredith's a great one). That he is driven and single minded doesn't seem to be a question even in those who admire him, so perhaps he was ready to get married (his brother getting engaged probably set the whole thing off), wanted to find a wife and found one. For someone that hadn't been raised in fundiedom, I can't imagine he expected things to move that quickly, but it would have suited said singlemindedness for it to move ahead with as few complications as possible.

Don't get me wrong, I certainly believe there could have been more nefarious motives, but I hope for Meredith's sake there weren't.

[SweetTexasCrude]

Many become just excellent politician's wives, so one with high aspirations doesn't need to go to the SAHDs to find a good wife - a fundie-lite sorority girl from Wellesley or SMU could do the job just as well.

:o

Wellesley?!?! No. Hillary Clinton (and I) went to Wellesley. There are no sororities at Wellesley. A fundie-light family wouldn't dream of allowing their daughter to go to Wellesley.

Wellesley grads become the politicians, not the wives.

[failsafe]

:o

Wellesley?!?! No. Hillary Clinton (and I) went to Wellesley. There are no sororities at Wellesley. A fundie-light family wouldn't dream of allowing their daughter to go to Wellesley.

Wellesley grads become the politicians, not the wives.

You're right! My mistake (and I should know better, my mom went to Mt. Holyoke!) Wellesley is an excellent school (as is SMU/Bama/most other schools - I definitely think that almost any college in the country can produce an educated feminist woman), I think I just have a Mona Lisa Smile picture of it in my head. Which I really should adjust as come to think of it, that movie was set 40 years ago...

I should note that I see nothing wrong with a woman either becoming a politician, or a politician's wife, as long as it is what she aspires to be and she doesn't mind and acknowledges that other women may have different aspirations than herself.

[Rue]

I like Meredith while disagreeing with what she believes. I really miss her blogging. I hate that Stephen shut that down. I hope her mom posts pictures of her visit!

[Librul]

she's sort of fundie-lite, and has fabulous taste.

Ok...fabulous taste...This made me snork...

27 Bell Ringers.

Sheridan's flower girl dress.

Meredith's wedding dress.

I rest my case.

Some people here love Meredith, some of us think she is just as dangerous and deluded as other fundies. Her parents are whack jobs, for sure.

(also, I was told my post count would be preserved, but here I am, telling you to go to hell instead of stacking 'em like cordwood.)

[Rue]

I hated Meredith and Sheridan's wedding dress. They were 80's inspired, ill fitting, and just horrible. I was very disappointed.

[Soulhuntress]

I think he is not buying into teh crazeee but he is going along to get along. IF he was fundie, he would NOT have joined a PCUSA in a college town. I said it on the other board: he is a bright guy who has had female elders (that is a PCUSA requirement IIRC) and he would do well in a reasonable church in one of the main conservative Presby denominations (the minis are a joke and a half). I doubt they are as fundie as the blog implies.

[contrary]

Ok...fabulous taste...This made me snork...

27 Bell Ringers.

Sheridan's flower girl dress.

Meredith's wedding dress.

I rest my case.

Some people here love Meredith, some of us think she is just as dangerous and deluded as other fundies. Her parents are whack jobs, for sure.

(also, I was told my post count would be preserved, but here I am, telling you to go to hell instead of stacking 'em like cordwood.)

mea culpa...the dresses were fug (as was her hair...wtf?). the wedding elements themselves were lovely, though, and i do think she has overall good taste.

i agree she's deluded. but i still love to look at her pictures!