Mills Family 7: Oh, Look, Another Reason to Detest Tom

[dizzy]

Okay popped back in to check on Tom/their situation after losing interest for a while and uh... Is it just me or did Tom go and find himself a female Tom? 

And here I was hoping his horny penis would lead him to a woman that might allow the kids to enjoy some sense of a normal non-cultlike-Christian life. She doesn't work (husband apparently didn't want her to), she homeschools using a religious program, she's also been married twice. She "doesn't believe in" social distancing and thinks she knows enough medical stuff from taking care of her husband for eight years that she doesn't believe the virus is real. She believes being a "Proverbs" wife and submission. Her last husband 'wanted and listened to her opinion' but ultimately things were his decision because he answered to God. 

He said their kids will all meet in July since she's coming for the 4th of July and then she's staying a month; are her kids staying a month too? Where? In a hotel with her? I'm still unclear on the ages of the kids overall but she has at least two younger ones. Those kids must have it even more rough than Tom and Andrea's. In the span of 14 months they've lost their dad, moved to a new state and now their mom is disappearing to go be a mom to someone else's kids. 

Some positives: she seems interested in getting the kids to try new food. She has a big house right now so she might be an incentive for Tom to end up in a place where some of those kids get to have space of their own that's more than the size of a twin mattress. She does drink wine, occasionally. I have to admit she made me laugh when the chat asked "Red or white?" and her answer was, "Yes." She also has a vested interest in feeding them vegetables and likes epidurals way too much to have ever had a home birth. She has kids in college. 

Overall... April seems like Andrea 2.0 - a few upgrades that might even make her more Tom compatible, but same basic wife model.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

1 minute ago, dizzy said:

Some positives: she seems interested in getting the kids to try new food.

That would be the first move if you wanted childhood me to hate you immediately. 

[Shaquillle Oatmeal]

43 minutes ago, Itsjustme said:

It is said that major life decisions should not be made 1-2 years after a loss, I guess Tom missed the memo on that. Didn't his "therapist" explain that to him? 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You must be referencing the therapist Tom has lied about having, yeah? When he first started lying about seeing a therapist he outright said it was so people would get off his back. Go back and watch when he talks about his fictional therapist. His voice changes. His facial expressions change. Tom is a shitty liar. He has also expressed his belief that it's acceptable for him to lie. 

But we see how much of a temper tantrum Tom throws when he thinks Claudia (a 4 year old whose brain isn't yet mature enough to distinguish fact from fiction) "lied."

If 'emotionally unhealthy' were in the dictionary it would have Tom Mills picture next to it. FFS... Why won't he admit he's wrong on a few things so he can make some positive changes for himself which will in turn fair well for those 8 little ones?!?

[GrumbleGrumble]

This April situation is juicy, but I feel awful for the Mills children, blowing in the winds of Tom's whims and desires. They still appear to lack adequate nutrition, education, or sufficient parental care and affection. Now Daddy Mills is salivating over his "hot" lady right in their faces, a woman who resembles their deceased mother but isn't, who may or may not remain a fixture in their lives. I fear this will lead to more trauma and confusion, especially for the girls.

Did anyone else catch during the Q&A, that Tom viewed 1,000 different dating profiles in his quest for a mate? Maybe an exaggeration, but flies in the face of the claim poor Tom is always so 'busy,' with no time to spare. (Busy with strangers instead of appropriately parenting his grieving children..) 

April recently purchased the Idaho home, 15 hours away from Tom, and has multiple children of her own. Her oldest son (25) and his wife (20) live with her. Sounds like a lot on her plate. I wonder, truly, if she didn't know about Tom's channel like she claims. Seems a bit coincidental, her being a self-professed Christian homeschooling mom with a large family too, also a widow, wow crazy luck. 

I found it disturbing that he allowed April to walk Sofia away and, presumably, tuck her back into bed during the live stream last night. I mean, what was he gonna do, interrupt his special time with the youtube people -- we all know the answer to that. But April shouldn't have private access to the small children, even if she does seem like a decent enough lady. She is still a near-stranger to Tom that contacted him on the internet a month ago. 

[Sloth]

So he has her doing the same colour clothing thing, he might as well just ask her to change her name to Andrea! I wonder if that's going down well with Judah. I wonder if Tom's mistakenly called her Andrea yet!

I've been wondering about why he wouldn't say what dating site they met on, weird, then I had a thought....maybe it's some type of "adult" site or hookup site rather than a regular dating site! 

[Shaquillle Oatmeal]

21 minutes ago, Sloth said:

I've been wondering about why he wouldn't say what dating site they met on, weird, then I had a thought....maybe it's some type of "adult" site or hookup site rather than a regular dating site! 

Right? Either that or his profile is still active.

[kesmom]

She’s already cleaning and parenting for him AND she has money. Tom certainly won’t be breaking this off will he. 
 

I’m not sure which bothers me more, the idea that she didn’t know about the channel in advance and seems so quick to jump in with minor children and go along with Tom’s ideals - or that she did know about him and purposely sought him out. 

[Shaquillle Oatmeal]

Something about April rubs me completely the wrong way. 

And frankly, I wonder if Tom subconsciously noticed it and that might be the reason behind his "black widow" dream?

Carl Jung theorized that where we won't allow ourselves to consciously take note of concerning matters that our subconscious will often materialize it in the form of a dream.

April strikes me as someone who has less-than-honorable motives, at best, regarding her involvement with the Mills family. And I get that she has money but I really wonder if she's a gold digger. 

[Itsjustme]

59 minutes ago, GrumbleGrumble said:

I wonder, truly, if she didn't know about Tom's channel like she claims. Seems a bit coincidental, her being a self-professed Christian homeschooling mom with a large family too, also a widow, wow crazy luck. 

That's a really good point. I hadn't thought about that. He did say her profile was only up for two weeks when she "found" him. It is definitely possible she sought him out becasue of all the similarities in their lives. I can't figure out why a woman who is all set financially, has a very large home, would want to jump right into another marriage and a totally different environment? 

[Itsjustme]

53 minutes ago, Shaquillle Oatmeal said:

April strikes me as someone who has less-than-honorable motives, at best, regarding her involvement with the Mills family. And I get that she has money but I really wonder if she's a gold digger

I think she has more money than Tom. My theory is she just wants to be married and Tom is easily influenced to do what she wants and or thinks. She'll keep him happy and he'll bend over backwards to keep her. She says he's in charge but she may be just making him think that. 

 

1 hour ago, Sloth said:

I've been wondering about why he wouldn't say what dating site they met on, weird,

He probably doesn't want anyone to see his inflated profile talking about what a Godly, hard working man he is. He did say that he and April came up as a very high MATCH on the dating site so I'm thinking maybe Match  . com? Possibly Christian Singles too?

 

1 hour ago, GrumbleGrumble said:

I found it disturbing that he allowed April to walk Sofia away and, presumably, tuck her back into bed during the live stream last night. I

Me too.  I would feel very uncomfortable if I was just dating a man and he had me go tuck his child into bed.  It seems she has no boundaries, inserting herself very quickly into not only his life but his children's lives. It's weird to me.  She seems very nice but very fast moving like Tom. 

[moreorlessnu]

1 hour ago, Sloth said:

I've been wondering about why he wouldn't say what dating site they met on, weird, then I had a thought....maybe it's some type of "adult" site or hookup site rather than a regular dating site! 

Maybe he doesn't want to give the dating site free advertising, and is hoping for some type of sponsorship from the site. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

5 minutes ago, Itsjustme said:

I think she has more money than Tom. My theory is she just wants to be married and Tom is easily influenced to do what she wants and or thinks. She'll keep him happy and he'll bend over backwards to keep her. She says he's in charge but she may be just making him think that. 

So she bought a copy of the JRod playbook?

[justlooking]

1 hour ago, GrumbleGrumble said:

This April situation is juicy, but I feel awful for the Mills children, blowing in the winds of Tom's whims and desires. They still appear to lack adequate nutrition, education, or sufficient parental care and affection. Now Daddy Mills is salivating over his "hot" lady right in their faces, a woman who resembles their deceased mother but isn't, who may or may not remain a fixture in their lives. I fear this will lead to more trauma and confusion, especially for the girls.

Did anyone else catch during the Q&A, that Tom viewed 1,000 different dating profiles in his quest for a mate? Maybe an exaggeration, but flies in the face of the claim poor Tom is always so 'busy,' with no time to spare. (Busy with strangers instead of appropriately parenting his grieving children..) 

April recently purchased the Idaho home, 15 hours away from Tom, and has multiple children of her own. Her oldest son (25) and his wife (20) live with her. Sounds like a lot on her plate. I wonder, truly, if she didn't know about Tom's channel like she claims. Seems a bit coincidental, her being a self-professed Christian homeschooling mom with a large family too, also a widow, wow crazy luck. 

I found it disturbing that he allowed April to walk Sofia away and, presumably, tuck her back into bed during the live stream last night. I mean, what was he gonna do, interrupt his special time with the youtube people -- we all know the answer to that. But April shouldn't have private access to the small children, even if she does seem like a decent enough lady. She is still a near-stranger to Tom that contacted him on the internet a month ago. 

Think about poor little Sofia - she got up for some reason to tell her Daddy something and it was HER that took her back to bed.  Some woman she doesn't know.  TOM should have gotten up like he has done before and taken care of what she needed and put her back to bed.  He was GIDDY that she did it for him.......if this is what he's going to put the kids through right now, he needs to give them EXTRA attention and support right now.  Let April color with them and play, get to know her, etc., but things like taking care of his children still needs to fall on him.  Jesus!  And I still think all this will be super hard on the oldest kids.  I kinda liked her until she said the Virus was bogus.  I noticed Tom was backtracking on what she said so bluntly -  I live in a hot spot and believe you me, if they weren't in a little shit town, they would probably be eating their words.  Regardless of anyone's view of the virus, Tom probably hit the jackpot because she's not living in that little house - when they get married she's gonna buy land there with a big house I bet and they'll all move in......

[formergothardite]

I find it hard to believe that she didn't know about the Youtube channel. Even if she didn't know when they first connected on the dating service, there is no way she didn't google him. 

Hopefully she isn't a total monster. So far she hasn't been shown to giggle as parents as they mourn their children, so maybe she is slightly less awful than Andrea. But I don't have a lot of hope that she is a caring person who puts the needs of children first. 

[Olivia Marie]

7 hours ago, can'tstopwatching said:

Her husband set her up to not have to work, she had two houses at once in CA including one on over 20 acres, she still has one more house to sell, this lady has got it made!! I'm now having dreamy visions of all the kids living in a big country house with a lot of land eating real meals and using several bathrooms. I hope it works out for everyone. Even if everyone involved is a lil crazy, I just want the kids to have a better life. Tom is rushing into making this very serious very fast so hopefully that, plus his awful personality, doesn't scare away a good chance for the kids.

Edit: She doesn't "believe in" social distancing and is "not worried about this stupid virus". The dreamy vision is dying, help!!!! I still have hope for the kids' livelihood though I'll just stick with that...

For the sake of the children, I hope things will be good for them - whatever that turns out to be.   I don’t care about Tom, not for a single second.                        

From reading the comments it sounds like she is financially stable, and at least partially normal.    It seems off to me that she would be interested in him.  One month is a short period of time, but enough time to at least get a peak into his bizarre thought  process.   

I don’t give a rat’s A about his dreams, desires, poor pitiful me, blah blah blah.   He only thinks about himself.    I care about the children who have always been afterthoughts.   Left to wither.   Their physical and emotional needs have never been met.   

 

[Shaquillle Oatmeal]

45 minutes ago, Itsjustme said:

I think she has more money than Tom. My theory is she just wants to be married and Tom is easily influenced to do what she wants and or thinks. She'll keep him happy and he'll bend over backwards to keep her. She says he's in charge but she may be just making him think that. 

 

 

Oh I don't doubt that she's better off than Tom. But I also don't doubt that greed grifts wherever opportunity presents itself.

[Maggiethecat33]

2 hours ago, Sloth said:

So he has her doing the same colour clothing thing, he might as well just ask her to change her name to Andrea! I wonder if that's going down well with Judah. I wonder if Tom's mistakenly called her Andrea yet!

I've been wondering about why he wouldn't say what dating site they met on, weird, then I had a thought....maybe it's some type of "adult" site or hookup site rather than a regular dating site! 

First post here, though I've been following here ever since Andrea passed (I'd been watching her videos for a year or so before that). I don't know if he was on any other dating sites, but I made an OkCupid profile a few months ago just to see if he was on there, lol, and he was. Also, the site gives you percentages of how good of a match you are with someone which they'd mentioned in last night's live, so I think they met on OkCupid.

[Olivia Marie]

27 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

I find it hard to believe that she didn't know about the Youtube channel. Even if she didn't know when they first connected on the dating service, there is no way she didn't google him. 

Hopefully she isn't a total monster. So far she hasn't been shown to giggle as parents as they mourn their children, so maybe she is slightly less awful than Andrea. But I don't have a lot of hope that she is a caring person who puts the needs of children first. 

I don’t buy her story of not knowing about his YT channel, not for a single second.  

From reading the comments alone, I get a bad vibe about her.  I don’t know what it is, but something is off.    

[Sloth]

50 minutes ago, Maggiethecat33 said:

First post here, though I've been following here ever since Andrea passed (I'd been watching her videos for a year or so before that). I don't know if he was on any other dating sites, but I made an OkCupid profile a few months ago just to see if he was on there, lol, and he was. Also, the site gives you percentages of how good of a match you are with someone which they'd mentioned in last night's live, so I think they met on OkCupid.

I should probably go and watch that live, I just have to be in the right mood to sit through his BS ?

[Shaquillle Oatmeal]

4 minutes ago, Sloth said:

I should probably go and watch that live, I just have to be in the right mood to sit through his BS ?

Been piecing through it, today. 

It is a whole lotta bs. And attention seeking. 

57 minutes ago, Maggiethecat33 said:

First post here, though I've been following here ever since Andrea passed (I'd been watching her videos for a year or so before that). I don't know if he was on any other dating sites, but I made an OkCupid profile a few months ago just to see if he was on there, lol, and he was. Also, the site gives you percentages of how good of a match you are with someone which they'd mentioned in last night's live, so I think they met on OkCupid.

Is his profile still live?

59 minutes ago, Olivia Marie said:

I don’t buy her story of not knowing about his YT channel, not for a single second.  

From reading the comments alone, I get a bad vibe about her.  I don’t know what it is, but something is off.    

We are definitely aware of the same vibe. Something about her makes my skin crawl.

Wonder if she knows that Ryan Schelling (Andrea's brother) and Papa Gary (Andrea's step dad) are both sex offenders?

[Maggiethecat33]

3 minutes ago, Shaquillle Oatmeal said:

Been piecing through it, today. 

It is a whole lotta bs. And attention seeking. 

Is his profile still live?

I don't know, I'm married so I closed the account right after. I have screenshots but I'm not sure if I'm allowed to share. I can post them if I get the okay, if anyone wants to see!

[HerNameIsBuffy]

1 minute ago, Maggiethecat33 said:

I don't know, I'm married so I closed the account right after. I have screenshots but I'm not sure if I'm allowed to share. I can post them if I get the okay, if anyone wants to see!

You can only post things that are publicly posted elsewhere.  If they are not publicly available then do not post on FJ.

 

[Maggiethecat33]

2 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

You can only post things that are publicly posted elsewhere.  If they are not publicly available then do not post on FJ.

 

Right, for this you would just need to have an OkCupid account. Kind of like needing a Facebook account to see publiy posted Facebook posts. So I think it would be okay but I'm not 100% sure. Thanks.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

11 minutes ago, Maggiethecat33 said:

Right, for this you would just need to have an OkCupid account. Kind of like needing a Facebook account to see publiy posted Facebook posts. So I think it would be okay but I'm not 100% sure. Thanks.

It isn't public.  I can see FB posts without being on FB...not a lot of them but you can see links.  Same with Instagram.  That's still public.

Dating accounts aren't public unless anyone with no account on that site could pull them up.

[dizzy]

1 hour ago, Shaquillle Oatmeal said:

Oh I don't doubt that she's better off than Tom. But I also don't doubt that greed grifts wherever opportunity presents itself.

Yeah I think that she seems like an extrovert that appreciates attention. I mean she stuck around to make his ten month video update about his deceased wife into a q&a about her, so... idk. She said her previous husband didn't want her to work and set her up financially but maybe she's already seeing that doing youtube and just stepping into Andrea's role there would be something fulfilling to do. She also said she hasn't had much time for hobbies since she spent eight years taking care of her husband as he died. If she's really an extrovert who has been limited in her capacity for travel and interaction and just putting herself out there for that long... well, like I said in my post earlier, she seems pretty similar to Tom in a lot of ways. There's validation in an audience ready to worship you.

There was that part of the stream where they both confirmed they wouldn't date someone they don't intend to marry, she said she didn't think it was "Biblical" (some real Duggar vibes there) so I'm guessing engagement by the end of her month long stay in July. I also wouldn't be shocked if Tom doesn't have her filming and editing the videos herself by the end of that long visit.