Unassisted Fundie Births

[dramallama]

4 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

Money plays into it, but I also think it's a general anti-science and anti-intellectual climate. From fundie villification of college to the election of Trump, there's a deep, deep mistrust of the pursuit of knowledge and "experts" in American culture (Hofstadter's Anti-Intellectualism in American Life remains disturbingly relevant more than 50 years after it was published). 

"There is a cult of ignorance in the United States, and there always has been. The strain of anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.'" - Isaac Asimov

[Anonymousguest]

Wow, a blast from my past. I know the woman who was the original owner of this site personally. Her name is Charity, she had 9 kids at home, several unassisted and then the last 2 were c-sections. I didn't look around the site or the links yet to figure out if she is still affiliated or if her birth stories are still on there. 

[Briefly]

7 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

NicNog used to like the whole unassisted birthing thing too. Thankfully she was sensible enough to go to a hospital when she knew something was wrong. It saved her life but it didn’t save the life of William. I hope Nic is never pregnant again but if she is, I wouldn’t be surprised if she had another hospital birth. I think Zoo Anderson is done with assisted homebirths. She loved her epidural way too much to ever go back. 

I loved my epidural a lot, too!  We did the Lamaze classes, but I just could not absorb most of the lessons.  I wanted a non-medicated or low medicated birth.  My water broke at night, we called the doctor and headed to the hospital.  About half way there, the pain started.  I looked at Mr. Briefly and said I was going to ask for an epidural.  He already knew that whatever the woman in labor says is the law, so he just agreed with me and then he made sure that they knew I wanted one. My sister in law had her first about 6 months after our daughter, she asked me about the epidural and I told her that I would have kissed the feet of the anesthesiologist if I could have!

8 hours ago, BrandoBarks said:

Andrea Mills talks on Youtube about why she prefers unassisted home births and why she does her own prenatal care as well: 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

There are several videos about her various (unassisted) homebirths and the attempts.The Mills also have Audio bible played throughout their whole tiny house 24/7......

 

The part about doing her own prenatal care is scary.  Prenatal care is so important, so many things can happen.  Prenatal care is not just so they can abort if there is a problem, which is an argument I've seen before.  If there is an issue, I would have wanted to know so I could be prepared.

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 minutes ago, Briefly said:

I loved my epidural a lot, too!  We did the Lamaze classes, but I just could not absorb most of the lessons.  I wanted a non-medicated or low medicated birth.  My water broke at night, we called the doctor and headed to the hospital.  About half way there, the pain started.  I looked at Mr. Briefly and said I was going to ask for an epidural.  He already knew that whatever the woman in labor says is the law, so he just agreed with me and then he made sure that they knew I wanted one. My sister in law had her first about 6 months after our daughter, she asked me about the epidural and I told her that I would have kissed the feet of the anesthesiologist if I could have!

I agree. If I was a religious person I would say epidurals were sent straight from god himself. 

[Mrs. Bean]

12 hours ago, BrandoBarks said:

Andrea Mills talks on Youtube about why she prefers unassisted home births and why she does her own prenatal care as well: 

  Hide contents

 

There are several videos about her various (unassisted) homebirths and the attempts.The Mills also have Audio bible played throughout their whole tiny house 24/7......

 

Why are these people always so crazy? A rhetorical question. It boggles the mind!

[Ozlsn]

5 hours ago, Briefly said:

The part about doing her own prenatal care is scary.  Prenatal care is so important, so many things can happen.  Prenatal care is not just so they can abort if there is a problem, which is an argument I've seen before.  If there is an issue, I would have wanted to know so I could be prepared.

My son would have been stillborn if I'd done my own prenatal care. Mind you I probably would also have died. Prenatal care can and does save lives.

[zeppelincommander]

Prenatal care can save fetal lives, which, given the rabid pro-life stances of most fundies, you'd think they'd be all about.  Sometimes doctors can even do life-saving fetal surgery, but there's a short window, and you have to have a good 20ish-week ultrasound to catch issues.

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

8 hours ago, Lisafer said:

This poor little student from the high school was observing/shadowing labor and delivery as part of an educational program. She was in my room for the whole shitshow of screaming and cussing. Probably effective birth control, lol!

I had pretty much the opposite experience with my second birth. (Both of mine were in a hospital with pretty flexible policies and a comfortable, warm atmosphere.) I had a fairly large group of family that I was happy to have in the room during the births, and the second time it included my husband's almost 17 year old niece.

I did most of my laboring at home and my parent's house, so we were only at the hospital for a bit over an hour before the baby was born. Plus, I was able to relax through the contractions ("self-hypnosis" relaxation techniques I started doing as a teenager) as long as everyone but my coach (big sister) stayed quiet. I basically got lucky enough to have a pretty simple birth, and since I relaxed best when I just did the breathing exercises, it probably looked even easier than it was.

After the baby was born, I heard our niece asking her grandma (my mil) if that was the way birth usually went? I also got to hear her grandma, the ob, and a few nurses chiming in that NO! it was an unusually easy birth. I think they were afraid that a teenager might get the wrong idea. 

I'm still really thankful I was in a hospital. There's a reason that the "no medical care ever" cult here has many, many headstones for babies and toddlers in the cemetaries they use. I know that a mother with a low risk pregnancy, proper pre-natal care, and a well educated and trained midwife can have a safe homebirth, but it doesn't sound like that's what this lady is advocating for.

[Shadoewolf]

These fundie births drive me nuts because they think God is there and going to protect them but then things go horribly wrong and its "such a blessing that Dr. X was there!" to deal with the aftermath. Whereas if they'd been in the hospital heroics might have been lessened or unnecessary at all. And if God is so great why did Sam Dillard end up in the NICU for 2 weeks? For being so pro-birth these fundies boggle the mind.

[VaSportsMom]

On 7/8/2018 at 1:08 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

NicNog used to like the whole unassisted birthing thing too. Thankfully she was sensible enough to go to a hospital when she knew something was wrong. It saved her life but it didn’t save the life of William. I hope Nic is never pregnant again but if she is, I wouldn’t be surprised if she had another hospital birth.

I don’t think that she would plan a hospital birth. She would prioritize her ego and the opportunity to say “fuck you” to the naysayers over the well-being of her child. 

[JMarie]

I couldn't read the blog entry because girlfriend doesn't know how to create a paragraph.

[Anonymousguest]

2 hours ago, JMarie said:

I couldn't read the blog entry because girlfriend doesn't know how to create a paragraph.

I don't think the formatting or anything had been touched on that blog since 1998 when I first met Charity. Who is, btw, an RN now. 

This is my favorite WTF unassisted childbirth story. All my babies were born by c/s, so this is completely out there for me. Tldr version -husband and wife have been arguing a lot, she thinks she's in labor but didn't tell husband. He leaves for work, she has the baby on her own to spite him. She delivers in the bathtub while other kids are at home. She goes out and sits on the couch after the baby is born, and older son brings her some chocolate milk. Then she puts the baby in a doll stroller and the 4 of them walk to husband's work and everything is right with the world. http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/birth-stories/joys-birth-story/

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 hours ago, Anonymousguest said:

I don't think the formatting or anything had been touched on that blog since 1998 when I first met Charity. Who is, btw, an RN now. 

This is my favorite WTF unassisted childbirth story. All my babies were born by c/s, so this is completely out there for me. Tldr version -husband and wife have been arguing a lot, she thinks she's in labor but didn't tell husband. He leaves for work, she has the baby on her own to spite him. She delivers in the bathtub while other kids are at home. She goes out and sits on the couch after the baby is born, and older son brings her some chocolate milk. Then she puts the baby in a doll stroller and the 4 of them walk to husband's work and everything is right with the world. http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/birth-stories/joys-birth-story/

Did you read any of the other stories on this site?!?! Here’s a quote from another unassisted birth story:

“Yet this time the pulse of birth feels wonderful! I am building up to the birth climax after nine months of pleasurable foreplay. With one push the babe is in the canal. THE NEXT PUSH BRINGS HIM DOWN, DOWN INTO THAT SPACE JUST BEFORE ORGASM WHEN WE WOMEN KNOW HOW GOD MUST HAVE FELT CREATING THIS PLANET.....

HE COMES, AS DO I.”

[NotQuiteMotY]

2 hours ago, Anonymousguest said:

I don't think the formatting or anything had been touched on that blog since 1998 when I first met Charity. Who is, btw, an RN now. 

This is my favorite WTF unassisted childbirth story. All my babies were born by c/s, so this is completely out there for me. Tldr version -husband and wife have been arguing a lot, she thinks she's in labor but didn't tell husband. He leaves for work, she has the baby on her own to spite him. She delivers in the bathtub while other kids are at home. She goes out and sits on the couch after the baby is born, and older son brings her some chocolate milk. Then she puts the baby in a doll stroller and the 4 of them walk to husband's work and everything is right with the world. http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/birth-stories/joys-birth-story/

She apparently did it (not telling her husband) twice: http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/birth-stories/michelles-birth-story/

[formergothardite]

The first time I heard of unassisted births was when I dipped my toe into Mothering.com as a new mom and discovered I was not nearly as crunchy as I thought. I remember this one poster going on and on about the unassisted birth she was planning.  She she had a special ceremony to transfer the spirit of her deceased pet rabbit into her fetus. She came back after she had her rabbit baby and claimed it was so peaceful and no pain at all. Someone produced her husband's blog where he talked about how the unassisted birth was scary and there was so much pain.  

Unassisted birth is just ridiculous. So many things are caught by prenatal care and having someone who actually knows what they are doing there during the birth. 

[PennySycamore]

@formergothardite, I think we're probably both pretty crunchy because some of the mothers on Mothering dot commune are just batshit crazy!

[Anonymousguest]

If I could have babies as easily as Laura Shanley I might have had unassisted birth! JK...sort of. Seriously back when I was having babies and reading all I could about vbac and having natural childbirth I fantasied about just getting up in the middle of the night and having the baby fall out into the bathtub. Who doesn't? Lol. My dream both was a precipitous labor in the car and a birth in the hospital parking lot, or on the elevator. I could never be so irresponsible to plan an unassisted birth outside of the hospital, but it sure sounded better than another c/s.

Shanley had a baby die shortly after delivery, who was determined to have a heart defect and an infection. She said that the heart defect was incompatible with birth, and maybe that is true, he was born in the early 80s. But surely having an infection didn't help his chances. I can't remember where he was in the birth order, before the 2 stealth deliveries I think though. So even having a baby die of a heart defect and a blood infection didn't change her mind about no prenatal, nor post natal care. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 minutes ago, Anonymousguest said:

If I could have babies as easily as Laura Shanley I might have had unassisted birth! JK...sort of. Seriously back when I was having babies and reading all I could about vbac and having natural childbirth I fantasied about just getting up in the middle of the night and having the baby fall out into the bathtub. Who doesn't? Lol. My dream both was a precipitous labor in the car and a birth in the hospital parking lot, or on the elevator. I could never be so irresponsible to plan an unassisted birth outside of the hospital, but it sure sounded better than another c/s.

Shanley had a baby die shortly after delivery, who was determined to have a heart defect and an infection. She said that the heart defect was incompatible with birth, and maybe that is true, he was born in the early 80s. But surely having an infection didn't help his chances. I can't remember where he was in the birth order, before the 2 stealth deliveries I think though. So even having a baby die of a heart defect and a blood infection didn't change her mind about no prenatal, nor post natal care. 

Her story is on the site! She said she gave him CPR to get him breathing at birth. Then a short time later he died. And yes it did make me wonder if he could have had some sort of open heart surgery as a newborn that could have saved him. But it was 1984 so maybe not.

[formergothardite]

56 minutes ago, PennySycamore said:

@formergothardite, I think we're probably both pretty crunchy because some of the mothers on Mothering dot commune are just batshit crazy!

I hopped on there thinking I would find a community of like minded crunchy people and immediately realized some of those folks thought I was way too mainstream! I owned a baby stroller! I sometimes used disposable diapers! I owned packets of baby wipes! I never considered giving birth out in a field at night serenaded only by the stars and assisted only by field mice! I didn't even know I was supposed to do placenta art and then eat the placenta! I was so terrified to post anything because those people were vicious. 

[Jana814]

I once watched a special on unassisted births. None of these women were fundie. It was interesting but it’s something I would never do. 

[smittykins]

I wonder if we saw the same special.  One woman's idea of prenatal care was going to the drugstore and using their blood pressure cuff(which I've heard can be inaccurate).  She had the baby at home, "caught" by her husband, but had to go to the hospital because the placenta didn't deliver, and claimed someone threatened to report her to CPS for having an unassisted homebirth. 

[Lisafer]

15 hours ago, Anonymousguest said:

I don't think the formatting or anything had been touched on that blog since 1998 when I first met Charity. Who is, btw, an RN now. 

This is my favorite WTF unassisted childbirth story. All my babies were born by c/s, so this is completely out there for me. Tldr version -husband and wife have been arguing a lot, she thinks she's in labor but didn't tell husband. He leaves for work, she has the baby on her own to spite him. She delivers in the bathtub while other kids are at home. She goes out and sits on the couch after the baby is born, and older son brings her some chocolate milk. Then she puts the baby in a doll stroller and the 4 of them walk to husband's work and everything is right with the world. http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/birth-stories/joys-birth-story/

Did you notice one of the last sentences? "I am floating on air. I am high."

Yes, lady. Yes, you are. 

[Jana814]

1 hour ago, smittykins said:

I wonder if we saw the same special.  One woman's idea of prenatal care was going to the drugstore and using their blood pressure cuff(which I've heard can be inaccurate).  She had the baby at home, "caught" by her husband, but had to go to the hospital because the placenta didn't deliver, and claimed someone threatened to report her to CPS for having an unassisted homebirth. 

I remember the drug store pressure thing. But I don't remember the placenta thing or the threatening of calling CPS. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I think these women are dangerous. They are giving these magical (and probably made up) accounts of their amazing unassisted home births. They are misinforming women and make them think it’s a good idea to have a home birth by themselves. I really hope most women see through their bullshit.

[chaotic life]

I cannot find the exact story of the supposed congenital heart defect baby. However, it would be absolutely impossible to state one way or another if a congenital heart defect would have meant certain death in a hospital birth environment even in the 1980s. But the infection would have been equally responsible for the death for certain.

When I do shadow care for homebirthers, I STRONGLY encourage that 20 week anatomical ultrasound even if they refuse every other diagnostic test. My main explanation to them is that heart defects are nearly impossible to detect by Doppler (or heaven forbid fetoscope) and absolutely 100% you would want to have a baby with a significant birth defect in a hospital to give them the best chance of survival.

Matter of fact, after my second baby, I insisted on that ultrasound with my own births before I would ever consider myself cleared for Home birth back when I was birthing babies. Of course, all of mine had complications and got transported to the hospital for other reasons anyway. But my last one was my only planned hospital birth and that was because the midwife on the second to last one abandoned me when I went into labor and my choices were unassisted or unknown transport.