Unassisted Fundie Births

[VaSportsMom]

This may be the most fucked up thing that I have read yet

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This really bothered me at first, but I have come to the point of accepting this as God shutting the door. If He wanted me to have an ultrasound, it wouldn’t be so hard to get one. Maybe someone will rear-end me in the car and then I can go to the ER and have their insurance co. pay for me to see my baby?

Like what in the actual fuck? 

http://birthjunkie.com/category/birth-stories/

[Tatar-tot]

I am surprised the Zsu has not decorated her living room with this stuff:

https://www.febromed.de/en/home.html

Its a German company so I thought she would be all over it.

 

[Ozlsn]

4 hours ago, VaSportsMom said:

This may be the most fucked up thing that I have read yet

Like what in the actual fuck? 

http://birthjunkie.com/category/birth-stories/

I hope I have twins, I don't think it's twins, I heard two heartbeats so it's definitely twins, one baby born.  Oh and increasing iron stores in case she has a PPH? WTH?

[starfish]

I think the fundie men are responsible in part for the home births. They resent the doctors being in control of the situation instead of them. (That's also why they like to be the pastor of their very own home church). Also, a lot of them are downright cheap. I understand if they are poor, but I think they more likely resent spending any money whatsoever on the medical side of birth.

Also, this pains me to write this, but there are times I think they view their wives as dispensable. That if she dies in childbirth, they can always find another wife.

[VaSportsMom]

43 minutes ago, Ozlsn said:

I hope I have twins, I don't think it's twins, I heard two heartbeats so it's definitely twins, one baby born.  Oh and increasing iron stores in case she has a PPH? WTH?

I am completely aghast by the stories. It seems that nobody knows their due date  (or even due month), how many babies they are having or where babies come from given the number of mentions of surprises and secret places. These people should not be reproducing.  One woman “prepared for any complication by obtaining a stethoscope and blood pressure cuff”!! I can’t look away but I pray that all the authors are teenage girls writing poor fan fic. 

12 minutes ago, starfish said:

I think the fundie men are responsible in part for the home births. They resent the doctors being in control of the situation instead of them. (That's also why they like to be the pastor of their very own home church). Also, a lot of them are downright cheap. I understand if they are poor, but I think they more likely resent spending any money whatsoever on the medical side of birth.

Also, this pains me to write this, but there are times I think they view their wives as dispensable. That if she dies in childbirth, they can always find another wife.  

I read one story where the husband “scolded” his wife for pushing when he told her not to! WTELF? There is definitely a strong correlation on that site between not having money/insurance and Jesus laying it on their hearts to birth at home alone. 

[Lisafer]

On 7/11/2018 at 10:05 AM, NotQuiteMotY said:

I just don't get the appeal. It's not like a licensed, trained midwife or OB won't listen to your requests (caveat: unless you're doing something risky for you and/or the baby).

There's many women who have had licensed medical professionals treat them badly, refuse requests, or pressure them into unneeded interventions. Doctors and midwives are not perfect by any means.

I apologize if it sounds like I'm picking on your post. I live in an area where the medical care is often absolute crap, whether at the hospital, the doctor's office, or the midwife's office. High poverty, lots of people on Medicaid, doctors who are overworked and underpaid. When I homebirthed my first son, the local hospital had a horrible reputation for misdiagnosing and poor care. It's since been taken over by a larger company. 

[Ozlsn]

15 minutes ago, VaSportsMom said:

One woman “prepared for any complication by obtaining a stethoscope and blood pressure cuff”!!

Yeah I read that. On the positive side, aware of preeclampsia. Negative side: obviously not aware of just how many interesting complications there are.

[December]

25 minutes ago, starfish said:

Also, a lot of them are downright cheap. I understand if they are poor, but I think they more likely resent spending any money whatsoever on the medical side of birth.

The medical bills for childbirth just 1x can be astronomical... imagine what the cost would be to have "as many as the Lord permits" at the hospital. The economic factors of having a kid are a great argument for affordable medical care, but also for family planning. 

15 minutes ago, Lisafer said:

There's many women who have had licensed medical professionals treat them badly, refuse requests, or pressure them into unneeded interventions. Doctors and midwives are not perfect by any means.

Great point, and many of these families are living in further out areas with fewer medical options. Negative experience(s) with a medical provider and a lack of choices are going to be especially powerful when combined with a culture that's often already wary of medicine, health insurance, etc. 

[VaSportsMom]

There is so much to eye roll here 

http://birthjunkie.com/tubal-reversal-home-birth/

Spoiler

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On January 18, 1999 I had a tubal reversal, by Dr. Levin of Louisville, KY. What a combination – the best doctor in the world and the Great Physician, enabling a total healing in my body. Six days later, Susanna was conceived

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The baby screamed as soon as she hit her Daddy’s hands, at which point Daddy named her – and the world must have heard the praising that was going on. Daddy handed Susanna to mommy and whooped and hollered some more

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While waiting for the cord to quit pulsating, G. went outside to enjoy a well deserved cigarette (well, a bubblegum cigar would have been better, but…) that was moistened with tears of joy. 

 

 

[mango_fandango]

Even with antenatal care things can go wrong; sometimes things aren’t picked up or labour can go awry etc. As some have mentioned, you can plan for a “zen” home waterbirth with a soothing whale-song soundtrack, but the baby doesn’t know the plan (and probably wouldn’t give a fuck if it did). So, blue-lights to the hospital it is. 

I remember Joy Forsyth saying that she was planning a homebirth but that the hospital was 30 mins away. Not quite as bad as it being over an hour or more away, but if I was in labour and things began going south I would want to be in a hospital so things can happen STAT, because things can go south fast, eg dropping fetal heartbeat or meconium in the amniotic fluid. 

(Side note: I feel slightly silly pointing out potential birth issues to a bunch of mothers when I have never given birth myself. Most of you guys already know this stuff!)

[EowynW]

2 hours ago, Lisafer said:

There's many women who have had licensed medical professionals treat them badly, refuse requests, or pressure them into unneeded interventions. Doctors and midwives are not perfect by any means.

I apologize if it sounds like I'm picking on your post. I live in an area where the medical care is often absolute crap, whether at the hospital, the doctor's office, or the midwife's office. High poverty, lots of people on Medicaid, doctors who are overworked and underpaid. When I homebirthed my first son, the local hospital had a horrible reputation for misdiagnosing and poor care. It's since been taken over by a larger company. 

The only newborn death a midwife friend of mine has ever experienced was under a local OBGYN. I don't remember all the exact details but She transported, handed all the paperwork to the OBGYN and said "she needs a C-section." He said "no she's fine for awhile."  She said "no, she needs one now." And anyway, he "monitored" the baby for too long and when he finally did the section the baby was basically brain dead. It was horrible. My friend fought and fought for her client but the OBGYN dismissed her concerns. Midwife and parents lodged complaints against the dr and he got a hand slap.  Baby lingered for about ten days. 

[adidas]

On 7/9/2018 at 9:31 AM, dramallama said:

"There is a cult of ignorance in the United States, and there always has been. The strain of anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.'" - Isaac Asimov

I think there are also quite a few cases of the Dunning-Kruger effect happening. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I read more than one story on that site where they refused Medicaid. Which makes me so incredibly angry. I’m sure they never take their children to the doctor as well. Which means they are not risking the health of their children because they can’t afford it, but because they refuse to use Medicaid on principle. Fuck that garbage. 

[Lisafer]

7 hours ago, EowynW said:

The only newborn death a midwife friend of mine has ever experienced was under a local OBGYN. I don't remember all the exact details but She transported, handed all the paperwork to the OBGYN and said "she needs a C-section." He said "no she's fine for awhile."  She said "no, she needs one now." And anyway, he "monitored" the baby for too long and when he finally did the section the baby was basically brain dead. It was horrible. My friend fought and fought for her client but the OBGYN dismissed her concerns. Midwife and parents lodged complaints against the dr and he got a hand slap.  Baby lingered for about ten days. 

A friend of mine was with her daughter, who was giving birth in the hospital. The baby came out with the cord wrapped around its neck and the doctor was yanking and turning the baby AGAINST the cord. A nurse stepped in and tried to guide her, but the doctor snapped at her and (later) outright yelled at her for "trying to tell me how to do my job!"

Thepoor baby survived, but I was terrified in my second pregnancy of encountering that woman during her on-call OB hours. 

[Briefly]

20 hours ago, mango_fandango said:

Even with antenatal care things can go wrong; sometimes things aren’t picked up or labour can go awry etc. As some have mentioned, you can plan for a “zen” home waterbirth with a soothing whale-song soundtrack, but the baby doesn’t know the plan (and probably wouldn’t give a fuck if it did). So, blue-lights to the hospital it is. 

I remember Joy Forsyth saying that she was planning a homebirth but that the hospital was 30 mins away. Not quite as bad as it being over an hour or more away, but if I was in labour and things began going south I would want to be in a hospital so things can happen STAT, because things can go south fast, eg dropping fetal heartbeat or meconium in the amniotic fluid. 

(Side note: I feel slightly silly pointing out potential birth issues to a bunch of mothers when I have never given birth myself. Most of you guys already know this stuff!)

Don't feel silly!  You are actually right, I never was a fan of the idea of home births.  I don't like to leave anything to chance, I tend to over plan things and birth is one of those things where things are going to happen the way they happen no matter what I had planned.  A few years before our daughter was born, a man I worked with was very excited because his wife was pregnant with their third and he (he, not her or them) had decided on a birth at home because it would be so much cheaper than a hospital birth.  She had complications in the middle of the birth and they had to get an ambulance to get her to the hospital in an emergency situation.  She was ok and the baby was, too, but it was pretty close.  I don't remember if they had a midwife or not, but I would not be surprised if they didn't because he didn't want to spend any more money than he had to!

Meconium can be a serious issue, we had to deal with it when I had my daughter.  They monitored her for any issues when she was in the nursery at the hospital but she didn't have any problems because of it.  But it was something that was very scary at the time.

[CancerBomb]

As a former Fundie, I was prepared to give birth at home with the help of a midwife, my husband, and maybe a nurse or something. From a young age (I think I was 12?) you're taught that male doctors are perverts, and if you go to a hospital you lose all control and autonomy over an exercise that your body was designed for. Nowadays, I don't agree with everything doctors do (ex: elective c-sections, pitocin instead of Foley balloon dilation, forcing moms into unwanted episiodomies) or the high cost of giving birth, but I believe in working to better the rights of women in labor so they don't turn to the birth equivalent of a wire hanger abortion. 

[Anonymousguest]

I know a couple that the husband insisted on a home birth. The first baby was a hospital transfer and the baby was still born, due to an infection. Mom wanted to have the second baby in the hospital, naturally. Dad instead on home. They transferred again. And again for the 3rd. 4th baby she had at home, and I thought she would have been thrilled. But when I took her a meal see said it was so hard, she was praying that her husband would change his mind and let her deliver in the hospital next time. He did eventually, she's got 6 now and the last 2 were born in the hospital. 

[VVV]

On 7/11/2018 at 5:15 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

I had my kids in the hospital in front of a bunch of people. The thought of coming in front of them all while they stare at my crotch makes me want to rip my eyeballs out. So I guess it’s good that she had him alone and at home....

I...er...had an orgasm during the hospital birth of my second son as he was coming (pun intended) out. Took me a moment to realize what was happening but I didn't say anything, nor did I moan in pleasure...I mean, yeah, that part was a nice surprise but it was still unbelievably painful over all (unmedicated by choice) and an instant of pleasure did not override the ongoing pain of transition and birth.

It's not anything I sought, nor did I even know it was a thing until years later. I just thought I was weird. And you'd better believe I didn't say anything about it to the doctor, the nurses, or my husband. Oh, and there was no repeat performance when I had my third child later.

[Lisafer]

1 hour ago, CancerBomb said:

As a former Fundie, I was prepared to give birth at home with the help of a midwife, my husband, and maybe a nurse or something. From a young age (I think I was 12?) you're taught that male doctors are perverts, and if you go to a hospital you lose all control and autonomy over an exercise that your body was designed for. Nowadays, I don't agree with everything doctors do (ex: elective c-sections, pitocin instead of Foley balloon dilation, forcing moms into unwanted episiodomies) or the high cost of giving birth, but I believe in working to better the rights of women in labor so they don't turn to the birth equivalent of a wire hanger abortion. 

I wouldn't call my homebirth the equivalent of a wire-hanger abortion. It's not like I think all women should have home births, or that it's all "ZOMG! It's the only way!!!!!" But it seems harsh to use that comparison. Unless you only meant homebirths like the ones in the OP? 

[VaSportsMom]

WTF does this even mean?

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They hooked up the fetal monitor and had trouble finding the heart beat. Then after every contraction, major decelerations concerned the nurse and doctor. The doctor urged me to consent to a csection, but I declined. I said, ” I have more faith in my baby than that.”

JFC, part of the same comment 

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She turned out to be a very intelligent, advanced child. She was speaking a lot already at 1 year old. As a two year old, she was at least a 3 year old verbally and understood so much. She could sing the alphabet perfectly, count to 15, and was so aware of everything. I remember giving her dimes to play with at 1 year old, because I told her that if she put it in her mouth, she would choke, and she understood and acted it out, and never put objects in her mouth. 

 

[EowynW]

2 hours ago, Lisafer said:

I wouldn't call my homebirth the equivalent of a wire-hanger abortion. It's not like I think all women should have home births, or that it's all "ZOMG! It's the only way!!!!!" But it seems harsh to use that comparison. Unless you only meant homebirths like the ones in the OP? 

Agreed. Many women have safe, positive homebirth experiences under the care of qualified, trained & licensed midwives. 

[HarryPotterFan]

On 7/8/2018 at 11:39 AM, feministxtian said:

I had three easy, straightforward births. I THOUGHT about having the last one at home because I felt that it was going to be the shortest and easiest of the three. However, that's where I have to hand it to my X. His X-wife had c-sections b/c of some pelvic abnormality (I don't remember now what it was) and when I said I was thinking about having the baby at home he flipped his shit...but, when the baby was born, he was like "is that it?". 

Baby #3 was the easiest. The only labor intervention was breaking my water just to speed things up. From when the doctor broke my water to birth was 94 minutes. He was born during a Star Trek TNG re-run during the bottom of the hour commercial break. By the time the show was back on, I was peacefully nursing our son. 

You can watch TV while giving birth? I’m totally going to insist on Harry Potter when the time comes

On 7/8/2018 at 12:39 PM, BrandoBarks said:

Andrea Mills talks on Youtube about why she prefers unassisted home births and why she does her own prenatal care as well: 

  Hide contents

 

There are several videos about her various (unassisted) homebirths and the attempts.The Mills also have Audio bible played throughout their whole tiny house 24/7......

 

I didn’t watch the whole thing, but props to Andrea for talking about finding out her baby’s SEX instead of GENDER like most fundies do.

On 7/8/2018 at 2:26 PM, ladyamylynn said:

Or the one where Dr. Crusher bangs her dead grandma's ghost boyfriend! 

What the heck??? This show goes to some strange places.

On 7/8/2018 at 5:23 PM, Lisafer said:

I'm in favor of science enabling men to get pregnant instead of women, haha.

PREACH!!! I want this so badly. I’ve even thought about how to make this work. Like can I have my uterus implanted in my future husband?

On 7/9/2018 at 7:07 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Did you read any of the other stories on this site?!?! Here’s a quote from another unassisted birth story:

“Yet this time the pulse of birth feels wonderful! I am building up to the birth climax after nine months of pleasurable foreplay. With one push the babe is in the canal. THE NEXT PUSH BRINGS HIM DOWN, DOWN INTO THAT SPACE JUST BEFORE ORGASM WHEN WE WOMEN KNOW HOW GOD MUST HAVE FELT CREATING THIS PLANET.....

HE COMES, AS DO I.”

TIL God had an orgasm when he created Earth 

[JermajestyDuggar]

8 hours ago, VaSportsMom said:

WTF does this even mean?

JFC, part of the same comment 

 

Sorry but I had to laugh at the ridiculous dime thing. What she described verbally isn’t that amazing. If she let her kids go to public school she would be the mom insisting her child should be in the gifted program although she tested too low for it. 

[Curious]

2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Sorry but I had to laugh at the ridiculous dime thing. What she described verbally isn’t that amazing. If she let her kids go to public school she would be the mom insisting her child should be in the gifted program although she tested too low for it. 

Both my kids understood verbal instruction long before they spoke.  It was clear they understood because they acted on things they were told.  That being said, I STILL would not trust them with choking hazards because they may understand when told/reminded not to put something in their mouth, they don't have the self-control and way too much curiosity to be trusted.

My son knew NOT to put his pb&j into the VCR.  We'd been over it *many* times   That didn't stop him from trying it (again) when I took a minute out of his sight to pee!  

[Lisafer]

1 hour ago, Curious said:

My son knew NOT to put his pb&j into the VCR.  We'd been over it *many* times   That didn't stop him from trying it (again) when I took a minute out of his sight to pee!  

But...but...the VCR slot is the perfect size for a PB&J! 

My 18-month-old knows he's not allowed to play with the printer, but he still tries. We tell him "no printing!" But it's just so dang fascinating.