Josiah and Lauren Part 9: Where Are They Honeymooning?

[Iamtheway]

3 hours ago, Caskett4ever said:

In the long term, I have an extremely lofty travel list with goals to hit all 50 US States (I'm at 26 right now), all 7 continents (I'm at 2 right now), and 40 countries by my 40th birthday (I'm at 14 right now and I'm 21). But the next new country I'm hoping to visit is Greece next summer.

I’ve only been to 1 state but I’ve been to 5 continents. And your 40 by 40 goal made me start counting.

I’m at 38 and will add Switzerland to that list in a couple of days. So I have some time to add one more country before I hit 40. 

[PumaLover]

On 7/6/2018 at 6:45 AM, bashfulpixie said:

People who travel - do any of you do your traveling alone? Most of my friends don’t have the either means or the paid leave to travel and I’m currently single. Which means if I don’t do something alone, I don’t do it at all. 

I do travel alone sometimes and I love it!! I usually get a National Parks pass and would just drive up to our local park for the day. I would take a picnic lunch and my camera and a book and go hiking by myself. I always told my husband exactly where I was going and when I would be back. I also regularly go hiking and sledding by myself in the wintertime. 

At one of my old jobs I would have to travel for work and that was a lot of fun. I am a foodie so I was always finding great new places to eat.

Last year I visited Flagstaff, AZ on my own for a few days. It was about a 10 hour drive. I had a great time driving and listening to music. I went to some awesome restaurants and brought my phone and read FJ while I was eating. I didn't care that I was by myself. It was actually very liberating and I proved to myself that I could do a long distance trip by myself. I also visited the Grand Canyon on my way back. It's my favorite National Park so that was really cool too.

I have been wanting to visit Iceland. I didn't know it was so touristy! I am a geology nerd so I want to check out the fire and ice. Maybe we'll go one of these years. I don't care how much money I have, as long as I can take care of my animals and be able to travel!

[FundieCentral]

Yeah, I think every time we discuss the ages of first marriage it always comes down to the ideas of maturity and independence.
There are 21/22/23-year olds who have a degree, have worked for a couple of years, have their own apartment, have been with their significant other for 2+ years, have been through some difficult periods together, and possibly lived together or travelled together (so spent some significant time seeing each other when stressed, unhappy, sick, etc.). They also have been able to discuss issues openly (and without chaperones ) such as religion, sex, finances, potential health crises, family relationships, lifestyle expectations, career goals, and other relevant things. 
In these situations, I always feel pure joy for the couple, and I am happy that they have found each other early, and I hope that they have a long and happy life together. 
I am certainly not entirely objective because I myself am in my early 20s and married. But while I haven't been married long, I wake up every morning  thinking about how lucky I was to have my husband, and that I can't wait to spend the rest of my 20s with him. I think I have shared previously that in my European birth country attitudes toward marriage (especially if you're under 30) can be quite negative, and that I am often a bit hurt when random people share their opinion with me that I made a mistake, or ask why "someone like me" would get married, or where the catch is. Spoiler Alert: We just really like each other   
The concern for the Duggar girls is that they just aren't really active participants in a life-changing decision - and given the environment that they are in, who they are marrying is the most important and essentially only major life decision they get to make. And the younger they are, the less agency they seem to have. They just fall in love, and then they are married 6 months later, and basically at 2 months of courtship is a point of no return - after that it's just a race to the alter and baby #1.
I personally think that one of the reasons why Ben and Jessa appear to have a much more balanced and healthy marriage is that they actually dated for a year before getting engaged, and during that period actually seem to have spent quite a significant amount of time together. Jill and Derick on the other hand seem to have been essentially total strangers due to most of their relationship taking place while he was in Nepal. I fear that Josiah and Lauren might devolve similarly. 
 

[SapphireSlytherin]

5 hours ago, Gillyweed said:

My mom and I are planning a trip next March for my 21st birthday. We are having trouble coming up with ideas. Currently unsure of length, but the longest it could be is 5-6 days, since it'll be during my spring break. All of your travel plans are making me want to go abroad, but that might be a hard sell. (Especially Iceland. It looks so beautiful!!)

Any ideas? (We're from the New York area)

We do 5-day trips to London or Paris all the time, so Iceland from NYC would be fairly easy. Doing short trips makes them infinitely cheaper because you don't need to pay for as many hotel nights or meals. Going in the off-season or shoulder season is better too, for smaller crowds. These short trips are actually very easy:  fly out Friday night, land Saturday morning, spend Saturday/Sunday/Monday doing and seeing all the things, fly home Tuesday, back to work Wednesday. 

On the other discussion, I've been to all but 4 states (AK, HI, ME, ND), but I've only been to 9 foreign countries. We will be adding at least one more country (for me) and two more (for DH) next spring when we travel to the continent for our 20th anniversary. 

[The Wanderer]

5 hours ago, Caskett4ever said:

In the short term, I'm traveling back to Cardiff to visit my boyfriend in August and then I'm thinking about doing a trip to Boston in October. In the long term, I have an extremely lofty travel list with goals to hit all 50 US States (I'm at 26 right now), all 7 continents (I'm at 2 right now), and 40 countries by my 40th birthday (I'm at 14 right now and I'm 21). But the next new country I'm hoping to visit is Greece next summer.

I loved going to Boston in October. The weather was great, and I went in early October and drove all around New England so it was like getting the best of summer and fall without too much of a crowd.

The states can really add up quickly. I just made it to all 48 lower states with this recent trip, so Alaska and Hawaii are next on my list (I’m trying to get to all 50 by my 30th birthday which is in just over a year and half away). It may seem like you have a long way to go with just 26, but I have actually visited 35 states in the past 8 years alone.

Internationally, I have been to three continents: North America, Europe, and Asia. I went to Hong Kong two years ago and it was an incredible experience that I would love to do again (although there is so much more of Asia I want to see). After Alaska and Hawaii, I hope to visit South Africa, although knowing my boyfriend, we will likely go to Europe or Japan first (he’s never been out of the US).

ETA: I’m really wondering where SiRen went now.

[Million Children For Jesus]

6 hours ago, Gillyweed said:

My mom and I are planning a trip next March for my 21st birthday. We are having trouble coming up with ideas. Currently unsure of length, but the longest it could be is 5-6 days, since it'll be during my spring break. All of your travel plans are making me want to go abroad, but that might be a hard sell. (Especially Iceland. It looks so beautiful!!)

Any ideas? (We're from the New York area)

In March, I would go to the Bahamas or New York, but since you’re already in New York, maybe...

Bahamas... perfect month to go 

Austin... SXSW is in March

Scottsdale/Phoenix... MLB spring training games, if you like baseball, but also a day trip to either Sedona, Tucson, Tombstone, or Elgin (wine and ranch country). 

Chicago... St. Patricks’s Day celebrations go big

Las Vegas... March Madness college basketball tournament 

Seattle... I enjoy Seattle as early as March, but I don’t mind gloomy weather 

Charleston, Hilton Head Island... a nice time of year to go 

Miami... popular for spring break break

San Diego... popular for spring break

[xenobia]

I tried this, and I've apparently been to 30 countries. None in South America, so that would be a nice goal

https://traveltip.org/countries_visited.php

And Si&Lauren - my bet is actually on somewhere in South America!

[Alice in Fundieland]

This discussion is giving me travel envy. I generally suffer from wanderlust and haven’t been much of anywhere so I love reading about all the places people have been and their travel tips. I live in the mid-Atlantic and have only been to 11 states. I’ve been planning a cross-country road trip for several years but haven’t found a way to make it happen yet. My husband doesn’t enjoy traveling as much as I do. 

This summer we’re going back to the same place we spent our honeymoon. We haven’t been back since then and our kids have never been to that state so they’re looking forward to it. My family rarely went on trips when I was a kid so I’m trying to expose my kids to more and get them more comfortable with and excited about seeing new places. 

My husband’s paternal grandparents were born in Italy. They died before he was born but we have some information about the specific regions in which they were born. We swear we’re going to make it there someday.

I want to see the world, but sometimes doubt I’ll ever make it out of the continental U.S. This summer’s trip is only happening because I took charge and planned everything. Maybe the cross-country trip will be my next project and Europe can be a few years down the road. Thanks for the inspiration, fellow FJers!

[SapphireSlytherin]

46 minutes ago, Alice in Fundieland said:

Thanks for the inspiration, fellow FJers

I've found the best inspiration for international travel is having a passport. If you don't already have one -- get one, and then there's no excuse! Especially because you live MidAtlantic where there are frequently $400 r/t airfares to Europe!  

[mango_fandango]

I haven't been to that many countries, really. France, Germany, Belgium, USA, Bulgaria, Menorca (Balearic island off Spain). If we're splitting the UK up into its constituent countries, then Wales and Scotland could be included. Oh wait and Italy. And a Greek island too.

France: various family holidays.

Germany: a school exchange trip, and then my university year abroad.

Belgium: school trip, to Ypres.

USA: school ski trip (New Hampshire). 

Bulgaria: my friend lives there and invited me to her place for a week three years ago (Sofia).

Menorca: family holidays.

Italy: school trip to Rome. 

Greek island was Spetses (my mum's cousin, and her kids, lived there for several years and I visited when I was about a year old).

I haven't been to France for a long time, so I'd like to go again. Really it'd be great to visit any of them again, although I'd have to be careful about Menorca and Spetses because they get hot and I am very pale...

As for new places, I don't know. *shrug*

[JillyO]

I am incredibly lucky that my husband and I both love travelling and have very similar travelling "styles" (we like most of the same destinations and usually agree on what we want to do and see at those destinations). We definitely prioritize traveling over most other things (such as owning a home) and feel privileged to have been able to travel a good bit already.

As far as bucket list destinations go (in no particular order):

Israel, South Africa (I've been twice, but husband has never been and we really want to go together), road trip through the Southwest (ideal trip would be three weeks from Denver through Colorado, Utah, Arizona and Nevada back here to the Bay Area), Croatia, Philippines, Costa Rica, New Orleans (husband has been, I haven't), Australia, Kaua'i, New Zealand, lots of Caribbean islands (Virgin Islands, Curacao, St. Martin, etc. etc.)

Some of those are more likely to happen within the next few years than others - especially since we use much of our vacation time just to go back to Germany to visit our families - but I'm confident we'll get everywhere eventually.

[Analytica49]

On 7/6/2018 at 12:34 AM, Chewing Gum said:

Not even that, it’s been 7 months. 7 months from getting to know to tying the knot. Bad idea anyway (I know people make it work but overall chances are pretty high they will grow apart just because their personalities aren’t fully developped yet, and honestly how well do you know someone if you can’t ever see them in private?)

But do their personalities even have the chance to develop, I wonder?

If each person can't have any kind of life independent of the other, and if, in addition, they have to devote all their time to conceiving, gestating, delivering, and then raising eleventeen offspring (and doing the work to support them), then it seems unlikely they can grow much at all. In addition, the environment they're in offers little stimulation, few chances for intellectual or artistic experience, and no encouragement for diverging from the religious pap they've been fed as children. And they only socialize with "like-minded" people--their own relatives and members of their cult.

I think of these fundamentalist marriages as being like two saplings planted too close together. They become intertwined and the branches can't grow properly because each tree is in the way of the other. If the soil is poor, they also end up stunted.

There may be cases where individuals in such a situation get to mature after marriage, but I wouldn't count on it.

 

[Analytica49]

On 7/6/2018 at 9:45 AM, bashfulpixie said:

People who travel - do any of you do your traveling alone? Most of my friends don’t have the either means or the paid leave to travel and I’m currently single. Which means if I don’t do something alone, I don’t do it at all. 

I'm in a relationship, but I've done a lot of travel on my own. Much of it has been the result of work-related trips, onto which I've tacked some holidays. I have wonderful memories of visiting Tokyo by myself for a week, of touring out of Capetown, South Africa, and of travelling all over Canada's Maritime provinces on my own. It can be tough (especially tough in Japan, because I knew so little Japanese) not to have someone else to share experiences with, or to bounce ideas and interpretations off. But at the same time, I was really proud of myself for managing to be independent.

I've also travelled a bit with friends (e.g., a Caribbean cruise), and with my mother. (We took our last international trip--to France--when she was 85.)

My first choice is to travel with my partner, but I have to recognize that he's not always available.

[Gillyweed]

7 hours ago, PennySycamore said:

If you've actually turned 21 by the time you go to Epcot, you can do Drinking around the World which is bacially a pub crawl of Epcot and is fun. but pace yourself.

I'm totally going to spend the next month trying to convince my mom to go to Disney! We're both total lightweights and she might be a bit over amusement parks, but I'm hoping the flower and garden festival will win her over. 

I would go to Disney every year if I could, but no one ever wants/has the funds to go with me. 

[MarblesMom]

Anthony Bourdain and Andrew Zimmern helped me get Mr MM across the globe.  Food unites us! 

This was a man who had never been east of the Mississippi - and he willingly went to Europe twice and to South America once, just for the food!

If you have a partner who is reluctant on travel, tempt them through their stomachs 

[NachosFlandersStyle]

6 hours ago, PumaLover said:

At one of my old jobs I would have to travel for work and that was a lot of fun. I am a foodie so I was always finding great new places to eat.

That's how I've done a lot of my US travel. Counted it up and out of 37 states I've visited, 12 were only for work. In some ways it really sucks; i was always at a cheap chain hotel, often for weeks at a time, on the outskirts of some city that was not exactly a vacation destination. But being on your own and having a per diem to eat really frees you up to see a lot of stuff. I always used to spend a little time before I left researching stuff like, what's the dish that's considered the local specialty? Is there a dominant industry in the area that I can ask people about if I need to make small talk? What historical events happened in the area? Is there a distinct type of architecture or rock formation or wildlife that's only here? (I was so excited to see "witch windows" on houses in Vermont, and the people I was working with had no idea what I was all worked up about!) Most every little city has an art museum, and some of them are surprisingly good! 

Basically, the US is huge, and while a lot of it is more homogenous than people realize, there are also more little quirks and pockets of cool stuff than people realize, if that makes any sense. 

[MarblesMom]

6 minutes ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

That's how I've done a lot of my US travel. Counted it up and out of 37 states I've visited, 12 were only for work.

When you are on a plane every week for work, you are going to knock out a lot of states.

I think I am only missing Maine, Kentucky and West Virginia at this point.  

[NachosFlandersStyle]

8 minutes ago, MarblesMom said:

When you are on a plane every week for work, you are going to knock out a lot of states.

I think I am only missing Maine, Kentucky and West Virginia at this point.  

You gotta check out WV! I've never worked there but when I was living in DC I spent many weekends in its state parks. What a gorgeous state.

[onekidanddone]

I take cross country train trips alone and love it. Getting on a train, settling in a sleeper closing the door is an amazing feeling. Last year from Maryland to Seattle and then down the coast to Los Angeles. For my 50th birthday I did the Vancouver to Toronto and to celebrate the one year mark after my cancer surgery I road to San Francisco.  

Sure I like to travel with my family, but those trips are never relaxing. We fly out to Colorado and make our way south to Albuquerque. It is all family all the time. By the time we get home I always feel as if I need a vacation to recover from my vacation 

[Travlr98]

On 7/6/2018 at 6:45 AM, bashfulpixie said:

People who travel - do any of you do your traveling alone? Most of my friends don’t have the either means or the paid leave to travel and I’m currently single. Which means if I don’t do something alone, I don’t do it at all. 

I have traveled on my own. I usually go on cruises.  I like them because I can meet people and still feel safe. I use the cruise line excursions even though they are more expensive. I just feel safer. I usually arraigne to meet anyone in one of the public areas and I never give out my cabin number.  I also take my name off the door so people don’t know a single woman is in that cabin. It actually feels weird when I travel with others.  

[just_ordinary]

What I find incredible frustrating about travelling is that if you visit every country/state just once you have never really visited it. I have been to Stockholm and the north of Sweden, nevertheless I haven’t experienced the huge variety of the country. There are still hundreds of places and things to do there.

I love travelling but I put quite some pressure on myself to experience the cultures I am visiting because it has been always an absolutely fascinating and great experience. It can be stressful sometimes though.

That is why we sometimes opt for a simple holiday where we visit places we have already been too and have seen a lot. There are still new things to do every time but we don’t feel pressure when we just hang out, read or walk the same way through town with a look in the same shops and eat in the same cafes.

Now, I just need more holidays and a pay raise so we can do both to an amount that seems sufficient......

 

[Alice in Fundieland]

@just_ordinary I agree completely. I get caught up in visiting new places to add to my list and then realize I also want to revisit some places because I didn’t get to see everything the last time I was there. 

[nvmbr02]

 I agree with not always getting a chance to really see something in a normal trip for say a week. Even if you can spend a couple of weeks it is never enough. I am thankful we have gotten a chance to live in a few other countries. It is still a short amount of time (1-3 years) but it is much better than a week or two. 

It is always a struggle for us to decide if we are going to go somewhere new or return to somewhere we love. Frequently we revisit countries that we have been to, but try to see something new too. So, we have been to Germany 4 times, but 3 times were to different areas. Or we really want to take my oldest back to the area in Italy where she was born and lived the first 18 months of her life but we are also looking at going to Greece the same trip since Dh and I  have not been there yet. It is the same when we travel inside the U.S. too. There are a few places that we really love and that we have visited multiple times but we also try hard to see new places. 

And I have WV on my list of states to visit. I have been to both Kentucky and Maine though, Maine is one of my favorites. I really like the Northeast in general. 

[G33kywife]

I love this thread drift about travel! I have an extensive list of places to go. It’s hard with young kids, but we are currently saving up for a Scandinavian adventure in 2020. We are fortunate to have many friends and family members scattered across the globe, so having places to stay makes our travel goals more in reach. 

In the meantime, I love exploring the American Southwest (I’m a native Phoenician)- many amazing destinations are within 6 or fewer hours of driving. My husband’s job makes it difficult to do extensive traveling unfortunately, but hopefully someday!!

[Thorns]

Oh yes, repeat visits, that is me ans London! I usually don't feel the need to visit places twice, but London... I've been 8 times, and I still want to go back

I want to visit New Zealand, maybe Australia but the though of spiders creep me out, Japan, travel/roadtrip though UK and the US!