Maxwell 20: Fun just dies

[Naga Viper]

5 hours ago, freejugar said:

This is like when you plug shit in google translate and you get a weird awkward sentence back

One of my all-time favorite FJ episodes was when we started feeding fundie blogs into Gizoogle and everything down to the comments was translated to sound like they were straight outta Compton. Whenever I look at Tits2, I still imagine Sarah's signoff as "Delightin' in Jizzy."

[punkiepie]

14 hours ago, anjulibai said:

I think they were still all going to a regular church at this point, too, because around this time Sarah began noticing the other girls at church also wore eye traps and did things to bring attention to themselves. 

Yes, they were.  Sarah and Teri would discuss the eye traps after church and Sarah would ask Teri why those girls parents allow them to dress like that- didn't they care about modesty?  And it bothered Teri because her pre-reversal boys were in their late teens and early 20s and she didn't want them exposed to such temptresses.  Probably another reason why they left real church and started the Church According to Steve.

[Granwych]

21 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

Yes, they have eased up on the clothing rules a bit since their homemade frumper days.  They used to make all the girls' clothes, and forbid anything that drew attention to the chest like shirts with pictures, words, and contrasting buttons.  They still double up on t-shirts as far as I can tell.   A single layer would be immodest!

Yes, but he's never told us anything about it!  As Air Force he could have been stationed in S. Vietnam, Laos, or Thailand - even close to Bangkok.  We have no idea what he did there.  

Also, Steve fibs when he says he wasn't raised in a Christian home.  His parents were just not Fundie Christian enough for Steve.  As a good little Christian boy, I expect he was shocked by military life in general.

Dammit, now I have an earworm.  You have to share my pain.

♪♫♬One night in Bangkok and Steve's world crumbled
The bars are temples but their women ain't free
He found a girl in every golden cloister
And if he was lucky, then the girl's a she
He could feel an hooker slidin' on his knee

One night in Bangkok and the Maxwell stumbled
Not much between control and ecstasy
One night in Bangkok and the Christian tumbled
He wasn't picky about his company
He felt the devil walking there you see♪♫♬

 

Wonderful!!  I love that song, and I love Murray Head!  your lyrics are spot on!!

[IReallyAmHopewell]

Steve and modesty....oiy, but yes, they have apparently lightened up some. They don't seem to have as many matching outfits these days, either.

 

I am apologizing in advance if this is not allowed. But here is a link to my post on modesty for men. It could be a wake-up call for Steve, lol 

https://hopewellslibraryoflife.wordpress.com/2016/05/26/9881/

[Palimpsest]

@IReallyAmHopewell, "Avon!" 

[punkiepie]

4 hours ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

Steve and modesty....oiy, but yes, they have apparently lightened up some. They don't seem to have as many matching outfits these days, either.

 

I am apologizing in advance if this is not allowed. But here is a link to my post on modesty for men. It could be a wake-up call for Steve, lol 

https://hopewellslibraryoflife.wordpress.com/2016/05/26/9881/

I love this!  I think it’s also important to note that while the Maxwells are crazy about female modesty, they are a bit more lax in the male modesty department, as evidenced by John and his love of the tight UA shirt that reveals a bit much. Or maybe he just dgaf, being their only strong willed child and all, and was like, this is what I’m wearing becausing we’re hiking a fucking mountain and it’s an appropriate shirt for the activity. 

[Black Aliss]

4 hours ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

https://hopewellslibraryoflife.wordpress.com/2016/05/26/9881/

"no woman has been known to find a man attractive in a short-sleeve sport shirt since the Eisenhower Administration so you’re safe."

One small quibble If I may.  Alex Honnold:

[kpmom]

Oh my goodness, @IReallyAmHopewell that was terrific!

It's funny that we're bringing up male modesty, because I thought the picture featuring Joseph's upper arm and tight t-shirt in the random life post was a bit defrauding.  Of course then there's Jesse with a very unsexy short sleeved sport shirt to get my mind back on track.

[catlady]

Well, Joseph is his own headship in his own house and can therefore wear what he (Elissa?) pleases; Jesse has to wait a bit for his turn to come around. 

[MamaJunebug]

9 hours ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

Steve and modesty....oiy, but yes, they have apparently lightened up some. They don't seem to have as many matching outfits these days, either.

 

I am apologizing in advance if this is not allowed. But here is a link to my post on modesty for men. It could be a wake-up call for Steve, lol 

https://hopewellslibraryoflife.wordpress.com/2016/05/26/9881/

BRAVISSIMA!

[PennySycamore]

@IReallyAmHopewell,  that blog post on male modesty was brilliant!

I also loved your post about the new Winnie-the-Pooh story.  The story was charming!  I also needed the reminder of Sybie, George and Marigold.  In one of the last episodes of Downton Abbey, (I think anyway), I think the children playing Poohsticks with Lord Grantham.  If not Lord Grantham, it was Tom playing Poohsticks with Sybie just before they left for America.  I wondered when I first saw that if it were a bit of an oxymoron, but it doesn't appear that it was.

[nelliebelle1197]

On 5/8/2018 at 11:46 PM, Naga Viper said:

One of my all-time favorite FJ episodes was when we started feeding fundie blogs into Gizoogle and everything down to the comments was translated to sound like they were straight outta Compton. Whenever I look at Tits2, I still imagine Sarah's signoff as "Delightin' in Jizzy."

Do you remember the Great Duggar You Tube Closed Captioning Adventure?  NOTHING WAS EVER FUNNIER!

19 hours ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

Steve and modesty....oiy, but yes, they have apparently lightened up some. They don't seem to have as many matching outfits these days, either.

 

I am apologizing in advance if this is not allowed. But here is a link to my post on modesty for men. It could be a wake-up call for Steve, lol 

https://hopewellslibraryoflife.wordpress.com/2016/05/26/9881/

Have you posted this before because I totally remember reading this?

[Naga Viper]

1 hour ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Do you remember the Great Duggar You Tube Closed Captioning Adventure?  NOTHING WAS EVER FUNNIER!

You know, I missed that. Either it was before my time, during my long FJ hiatus, or the more recent stretch where I avoided the Duggar forum like some people avoid the Nauglers'.

[Granwych]

17 hours ago, Black Aliss said:

"no woman has been known to find a man attractive in a short-sleeve sport shirt since the Eisenhower Administration so you’re safe."

....I do find Grampwych to be still hot in a sport shirt, especially if it isn't baggy and buttoned up too high...

[Milly-Molly-Mandy]

On 07/05/2018 at 6:59 AM, HeadshipRegent said:

Realizing Sarah is almost 40 makes me even angrier with Stevehovah for doing all of this to his family. 

Ok ok ok ladies please stop with this almost 40. She’s 36. She’s in her mid 30s she’s YEARS off from 40.

 

She’s also a year older than me and I may be taking this personally

[nomoxian]

She is a couple years older than I am  While I don't think of myself as "old" I do realize that I am pretty much half way to retirement (ha!) age, which is kinda like "middle aged".

[Milly-Molly-Mandy]

Not helping @nomoxian  

wasn’t it just a few years ago I was just 18 & going clubbing and at uni?

 

 

[dripcurl]

It's not so much that Sarah's age is nearing 40, it's that her captivity is. 

[Milly-Molly-Mandy]

1 minute ago, dripcurl said:

It's not so much that Sarah's age is nearing 40, it's that her captivity is. 

I agree. These threads use to turn into ‘I’m Sarah’s age and I’ve achieved all of this...’ and I was as guilty as anyone of this. Now I think it’s more sadness and maybe hopelessness at her situation. 

Having kids has been the best (& hardest) thing I have ever done. As I nurse my sweet baby girl to bed each night I am overcome with gratefulness to be her Mummy. My son’s sweet hugs and kisses when I pick him up from pre school make me swoon. That someone who so desired being a Mum is seeing her fertile years quickly slip away must be heartbreaking. Steve has done her the biggest disservice, robbing her of the chance to be a mother. And he can’t see it. 

[petrushka]

Maybe it's just me but I don't get the motherly vibe from Sarah. Perhaps because she probably helped raise the reversal siblings?  I don't get the motherly vibe from Mary either.  I do sense it is strong in Anna, though.  I hurt for her more and hope that she will get her chance.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

On 5/10/2018 at 9:46 AM, nelliebelle1197 said:

Have you posted this before because I totally remember reading this?

Possibly--I've shared it many places. I just get sick of it all being put on the women.

[socalrules]

I thought the Maxwells weren’t allowed friends. Who are the friends that helped plant the strawberries? 

[Starrynight]

11 minutes ago, socalrules said:

I thought the Maxwells weren’t allowed friends. Who are the friends that helped plant the strawberries? 

I'm really hoping that the Maxwell daughters are living an entirely different (i.e friend-filled) life. And that they just don't show it on the blog because it would be bad for their "brand". <fingers crossed>

[ViolaSebastian]

2 hours ago, petrushka said:

Maybe it's just me but I don't get the motherly vibe from Sarah. Perhaps because she probably helped raise the reversal siblings?  I don't get the motherly vibe from Mary either.  I do sense it is strong in Anna, though.  I hurt for her more and hope that she will get her chance.

It's so hard to tell with these fundie maidens, because they pretty much have one of two choices: marriage (and, by default, children) or slowly growing old whilst living with their parents. If they aren't really motherly, and advertise themselves as such, there goes their one method of getting out of the house and getting to be an adult. I imagine there are more than a few who, if brought up to have other, more secular, career paths available to them, would choose the childfree route. But that's just not a choice for them. Which is heartbreaking--kiddos deserve to have parents who really wanted them--and conversely, adults should have the choice on whether to have kiddos. What a cluster. 

[Palimpsest]

52 minutes ago, socalrules said:

I thought the Maxwells weren’t allowed friends. Who are the friends that helped plant the strawberries? 

The Maxwell girls have friends.  The Maxwells mention this all the time.  Lots of friends, so long as they are Steve-approved and suitably be-skirted.  They are just not allowed to have "best friends."  Those are their siblings.

According to Steve, they meet their friends at conferences, at the church they hooked up with to witness alongside as they paint faces and blow up balloons, and there are supposed to be other families that meet at the Church of the Holy Nursing Home.  These friends just rarely get into photographs.  They are very occasionally spotted or mentioned as they bless each other with good works but never named.

And Sarah needs a thesaurus more than ever:

Quote

Last week, the girls built a raised bed with scrap lumber. Since our dirt isn’t very good, we also needed quality dirt. Our city gives away compost dirt, which one guy told Dad was the best ever on his garden. Dad and the girls loaded up dirt in trash cans (hey, we need a pickup!) and put it into the van and transported it back to the garden.

Dirt: Soil, topsoil, potting mix, compost (which is not dirt but mostly humus), or even good old earth.

And was that a not very subtle grift for a pickup, Sarah?