Dillards 46: Now with Pants and a Possible Nose Piercing

[Seculardaisy]

3 hours ago, Georgiana said:

Absolutely agree.  A child should not be the PRIMARY caregiver to their younger sibling.  They also should not be spending unreasonable amounts of time caring for the child.  Watching the kids while mom makes dinner?  Reasonable.  Watching them in the middle of the night?  NOT reasonable.  It's babysitter vs nanny.  A child may be reasonably expected to babysit a younger sibling, but when it moves into nanny territory, they should AT LEAST be getting compensated.

Also, the child needs to be able to say no or put their life first.  PARENTS need to sacrifice for their kids, but a child should not be expected to put their needs behind the needs of their sibling.  This means the elder child should be able to get out of watching the younger child in order to complete their own tasks (such as school work)  or attend social events occasionally.  

When a child is expected to help out so much with a younger sibling that they are essentially an unpaid nanny and/or their own interests suffer, THAT is when it crosses the line.  

I found a really compelling article on this the other day when I was bored and browsing the web. It seems relevant to share it now. 

They talk about the damage to children who are forced to become caregivers to their siblings at a young age.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.theatlantic.com/amp/article/543975/

This part really stuck out to me:

“If you’re parentified and you leave your younger siblings, it’s like having a parent abandon them.”

[meowfundiecatz]

I genuinely find it ironic that Derick is so disgusted about transgender issues, yet at this very time Jill decides to wear pants. I've read all the modesty stuff and while a lot of it is about "defrauding," a lot is also about gender distinction.

[bananabread]

Oh my gosh, AGAIN D-Wreck with the crusade against transgender people.

I feel so freaking bad for Jill and the boys. D-Wreck clearly has a lot of fire-and-brimstone anger to work out, and an addiction to finding reasons why he's superior to other humans.

[RainbowSky]

Am i the only one who was raised being told that henna was bad spiritually? I'm actually surprised for this one! The pants, nah. Nose piercing, maybe. But henna surprises me lol.

[HarleyQuinn]

People do henna at state fairs around here every year so I can't give Jill "worldly" points there. I bet every single Duggar would get henna if offered. 

dWRECK's twitter feed is basically a while male christian stereotype at this point. It could almost be a parody.

Wahhh protect familes! (rich ones) White people are under attack! (because you're probably racist) Don't compromise your values! (I can be a shitty person,Jesus will forgive me!)

[SamiKatz]

One of my friends, who is Indian, got married recently and I was invited to the mehndi party but could not attend, which I really regretted.  My friend's design was so beautfiul and intricate, it's a real art form.

I would wear henna at the slightest provocation, I really think it looks amazing.

[HarryPotterFan]

14 hours ago, Seculardaisy said:

I found a really compelling article on this the other day when I was bored and browsing the web. It seems relevant to share it now. 

They talk about the damage to children who are forced to become caregivers to their siblings at a young age.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.theatlantic.com/amp/article/543975/

This part really stuck out to me:

“If you’re parentified and you leave your younger siblings, it’s like having a parent abandon them.”

I posted about this in QoS a while back, feel free to start up the conversation again: 

 

It's definitely relevant to the Duggars.

3 hours ago, HarleyQuinn said:

People do henna at state fairs around here every year so I can't give Jill "worldly" points there. I bet every single Duggar would get henna if offered. 

dWRECK's twitter feed is basically a while male christian stereotype at this point. It could almost be a parody.

Wahhh protect familes! (rich ones) White people are under attack! (because you're probably racist) Don't compromise your values! (I can be a shitty person,Jesus will forgive me!)

Protect the fetuses!!! (But not babies and children!) 

[potato]

I feel like I'll I've been posting lately is Jill's Instagram posts, but here I am again.  Photo under the spoiler, as usual.  

Spoiler

 

Look, I think my boyfriend is one of the cutest guys in the world.  But do I keep pictures of him as bookmarks?  That would be a no.

Also jeans again.

[HarleyQuinn]

4 minutes ago, potato said:

I feel like I'll I've been posting lately is Jill's Instagram posts, but here I am again.  Photo under the spoiler, as usual.  

  Reveal hidden contents

 

Look, I think my boyfriend is one of the cutest guys in the world.  But do I keep pictures of him as bookmarks?  That would be a no.

I suppose if she can't be attached to his hip 24/7 that's a compromise?

[singsingsing]

I'm sorry, that just screams OVERCOMPENSATION. "Hey Instagram, I love my husband SOOOOOO much that I just stare and stare at a photograph of him while I journal/listen to music/read my Bible. HE'S MY FAVOURITE!!!"

I could see if they were teenagers dating, or they lived apart and had a long distance relationship, or Derick was in hospital or something. But this? This is just weird.

Now I know someone is going to pop up and say, "I use a photograph of my husband as a bookmark and we have the happiest, most secure marriage ever" which is great. But taking into account who Jill is, and who Derick is, and what they've been acting like over the course of their marriage, I'm going to go with the theory that in this case it's suggestive of a ridiculously insecure relationship and a desperation to to hide the truth (from herself/the world).

[onekidanddone]

5 hours ago, HarleyQuinn said:

Wahhh protect familes! (rich ones) White people are under attack! (because you're probably racist) Don't compromise your values! (I can be a shitty person,Jesus will forgive me!)

White lady here, and I feel like smacking Derdork upside the head. No, I do not feel 'under attack' by People of Color. I feel under attack by other White people.  It is crystal clear to me that Black Lives Matter does not mean White lives don't, while White lives matter means that people of color don't matter.  I'm not the best at articulating why I feel that way, I just do.

[VelociRapture]

4 minutes ago, onekidanddone said:

White lady here, and I feel like smacking Derdork upside the head. No, I do not feel 'under attack' by People of Color. I feel under attack by other White people.  It is crystal clear to me that Black Lives Matter does not mean White lives don't, while White lives matter means that people of color don't matter.  I'm not the best at articulating why I feel that way, I just do.

Yes!!!! I’m a white woman who does not feel under attack by black people - I feel under attack by the white men on Capitol Hill. I’m not worried that I’m going to be killed in a terrorist attack or street violence - I’m worried I’m going to be killed by a rabid white dude with a chip on his shoulder and access to guns that he probably shouldn’t have. I’m not worried about Hispanics taking our jobs - I’m worried that the tax bills proposed by white guys will make a decent life next to impossible for some of the people I care about. And I’m not worried about being attacked in a bathroom by a Transgender woman - I am worried about being attacked or raped by people like Brock Turner, Stanford Dumpster Rapist, and Matt Lauer though. 

Derick, like Trump, needs someone to take away his internet access. 

[Eternalbluepearl]

How many times and for how many years can someone still enjoy reading the same book? I would die of boredom as a fundie. Their quiet time is ALWAYS reading the Bible. 

[Screamapillar]

Maybe Jill uses Derick's picture on bookmarks on pages that contain a verse that he used in his daily twitter rant. I could see how that could come in handy in keeping track of his nonsense.

[Georgiana]

If I put a picture of my boyfriend in my Bible, he would ask me if I was planning on worshiping him instead.

Edit: I HAVE used pictures of my boyfriends as bookmarks.  In middle and high school.  Never as an adult.  So it seems VERY juvenile to me.  Just one more way the Dillards appear to be a high school first love romance  that went too far.  

[Feministe9000]

1 hour ago, singsingsing said:

I'm sorry, that just screams OVERCOMPENSATION. "Hey Instagram, I love my husband SOOOOOO much that I just stare and stare at a photograph of him while I journal/listen to music/read my Bible. HE'S MY FAVOURITE!!!"

I could see if they were teenagers dating, or they lived apart and had a long distance relationship, or Derick was in hospital or something. But this? This is just weird.

Now I know someone is going to pop up and say, "I use a photograph of my husband as a bookmark and we have the happiest, most secure marriage ever" which is great. But taking into account who Jill is, and who Derick is, and what they've been acting like over the course of their marriage, I'm going to go with the theory that in this case it's suggestive of a ridiculously insecure relationship and a desperation to to hide the truth (from herself/the world).

I 100% agree. Jill is overcompensating, and if she keeps reading verses about how she is "washed of sin" and "pure in the face of Jesus" and "no matter what happens God will save you", and it makes her feel better/sane, then so be it.
She lacks emotional maturity, critical thinking skills, and is married to the first guy she kissed, who has recently started to become who he truly is-and maybe always was- and has been through alot in the past few years.

Jill is coping, and if that means reading the Bible over and over till her eyes cross, sketching notes and using Derick's photos as bookmarks, then so be it. She has no other options, we all know therapy is off the table.

I see a girl forced into woman hood by bearing children, and is still just an insecure frightened child who desperately craves attention. If she wants to hide from the truth, I don't blame her. Better to live in a fantasy than in reality with Derick. If you're stuck with him, which she seems to be.

 

[HarryPotterFan]

3 hours ago, potato said:

I feel like I'll I've been posting lately is Jill's Instagram posts, but here I am again.  Photo under the spoiler, as usual.  

  Hide contents

 

Look, I think my boyfriend is one of the cutest guys in the world.  But do I keep pictures of him as bookmarks?  That would be a no.

Also jeans again.

 I feel like that puke emoji is an understatement of how I feel. I agree that using your husband's photo as a bookmark is super juvenile. It reminds me of a middle school girl who has her favorite boy band's photos plastered all over everything. Posters on her wall, lunch box, folders, notebooks, clothing, bookmarks... 

Oh lord. Jill is going to start getting custom made shirts with his face on them, isn't she?

2 hours ago, onekidanddone said:

White lady here, and I feel like smacking Derdork upside the head. No, I do not feel 'under attack' by People of Color. I feel under attack by other White people.  It is crystal clear to me that Black Lives Matter does not mean White lives don't, while White lives matter means that people of color don't matter.  I'm not the best at articulating why I feel that way, I just do.

As a white woman, I've lost track of the number of times my reaction to the news was, "Ugh, white people."

ETA: 

2 hours ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

How many times and for how many years can someone still enjoy reading the same book? I would die of boredom as a fundie. Their quiet time is ALWAYS reading the Bible. 

I've lost track of the number of times I've read Harry Potter. Makes watching the movies quite aggravating, because I notice the smallest changes. But I've also read other books, so...

[Carm_88]

Well Jill, I don't mean to brag but I use a picture of my cat in a bucket from he was a kitten as a bookmark; so my picture is much cuter.

[TakingBibleClasses]

2 hours ago, Georgiana said:

If I put a picture of my boyfriend in my Bible, he would ask me if I was planning on worshiping him instead.

Yeah, idolatry, much? Ugh. Hope you're using one of those pictures to bookmark Luke 14:26, Jill.

Also, looks like she's reading a Spanish-English parallel Bible. At least trying to keep up with whatever Spanish she may have had?

[Gillyweed]

Does anyone else feel like Jill is trying too hard to be relatable now?

[BlondeIdol]

I don't mean to make anyone jealous but I have a pretty sweet Dragon Ball Z bookmark my youngest brother gave me for Christmas a few years ago. Jill would def be jealous. 

All I've gathered from this is that Jill is trying very hard with the Instagram to be likable and relatable. She's trying to be like Jessa. Jessa comes off as less juvenile. In general Jill is acting like Derick is her first high school boyfriend and not her husband. I find it extremely weird. I notice the same kind of thing with Joy and Austin.

I just can't imagine treating my boyfriend in this way.

[LacyMay]

4 hours ago, potato said:

I feel like I'll I've been posting lately is Jill's Instagram posts, but here I am again.  Photo under the spoiler, as usual.  

  Reveal hidden contents

 

Look, I think my boyfriend is one of the cutest guys in the world.  But do I keep pictures of him as bookmarks?  That would be a no.

Also jeans again.

I think this has been shared before, but it seemed fitting for this 

 

[Iamtheway]

I could easily have my husbands picture as a bookmark. If it happened to be the closest thing to me when I needed one. It probably wouldn’t be though since I usually don’t keep photos just lying around randomly. 

I love the man and think he is pretty handsome but we live together and I can look at the real deal as much as I like. During my quiet time I like to imagine I’m young, skinny, single, and carefree.

[singsingsing]

1 minute ago, Iamtheway said:

I could easily have my husbands picture as a bookmark. If it happened to be the closest thing to me when I needed one. It probably wouldn’t be though since I usually don’t keep photos just lying around randomly. 

I love the man and think he is pretty handsome but we live together and I can look at the real deal as much as I like. During my quiet time I like to imagine I’m young, skinny, single, and carefree.

Plus, you're not carefully arranging it all and photographing it to share to your million followers on Instagram with weird captions to reassure the world that your #hubby is #yourfavourite!!

[onekidanddone]

4 hours ago, Georgiana said:

If I put a picture of my boyfriend in my Bible, he would ask me if I was planning on worshiping him instead.

Edit: I HAVE used pictures of my boyfriends as bookmarks.  In middle and high school.  Never as an adult.  So it seems VERY juvenile to me.  Just one more way the Dillards appear to be a high school first love romance  that went too far.  

I expect her to start writing Dertwit's name on her hand or a pile of napkins.  Hey I did that, but I was 12.