Jazz Hands, Sparkle Crotch: Erika Schupe Pt. 9

[Showtunesgirl]

1 hour ago, usmcmom said:

I wonder if Erika does not really need to schedule her day, but rather feels the need to mold her day into something that needs to be scheduled. Does that make sense??

Schedules and lists are her security blanket. Suddenly she has found herself with plenty of time to get it all done and has no need to block off her day into 15-minute increments. She probably feels lost without that list and is just thinking of ways to keep making that schedule. 

It makes me think of a little girl who gets a new purse. She has no need of a purse and nothing she MUST carry with her but by golly she is going to carry that purse. So, she goes around the house and fills the purse with all sorts of needless items. 

Or am I the only one that did that?

Me! You reminded me of this picture I saw online a few weeks ago, I wish I had been as smart as this kid, she's a genius (sorry, I couldnt paste it here because it's a tweet)

 Little girl and her purse

[usmcmom]

12 minutes ago, Showtunesgirl said:

Me! You reminded me of this picture I saw online a few weeks ago, I wish I had been as smart as this kid, she's a genius (sorry, I couldnt paste it here because it's a tweet)

 Little girl and her purse

Oh my gosh!  Why have I never thought to carry Cheetos in my purse?!? 'Cause Cheetos are NOT worthless!

[Jellybean]

I'm so thrilled for the whole Shupe family that they've been able to make, and adapt to, such a momentous change. I'd been trying not to get my hopes up, despite so many things seeming to point to the kids being at school, so having it confirmed is great news, despite the lack of explanation. I know that a number of other families we follow here have made the switch from homeschooling, and it certainly doesn't have to mean that the Shupes no longer hold any damaging beliefs, but I really do feel hopeful for them. I hope this decision turns out to be good for them as a family, and for each of them as individuals. 

Erika's blog obviously did focus on people who shared her faith and who had large families, but I seem to remember from comments on her blog and here that people appreciated some of her organising/storage/homemaking posts despite the religion. Personally, I think Erika could use her large-family-in-small-house as encouragement to her blog readers that it's possible to stick to a budget, live in a small house, have lots of children with various individual needs, and maintain a degree of order and sanity, without having to bring her faith into it at all. I think that might end up appealing to at least as many people as her previous 'ministry'. I can only hope that if she is trying to secularise her blog, that she will end up questioning some of her other actions, and that she will change how she does things, not just decide not to write about them. Karen and Melanie seem to have found their voices, and I hope they will continue to use them for good within the family, and that they receive support from extended family and friends/others outside the family to speak up when things are not right, while still maintaining relationships within the family if at all possible. 

[December]

Well, that's pretty awesome the kids are in public school and they're admitting it. Hopefully, it works out better for their whole family, although it's too bad that the oldest kids won't have much/any time to experience the academic and social benefits of school before they age out.

[VaSportsMom]

Please tell me that one of you posted the "Anna V" comment. That woman should not be homeschooling five kids.

[usedbicycle]

4 hours ago, Hisey said:

Erika's new post is foolish and irritating. Does she really think her readers will be satisfied with "I'm not telling you why they are back in school, and I'm not telling you what I do all day, but here are my ideas about scheduling and I hope they are helpful! Here they are: plan ahead, don't forget things, and write it down. Hope this post was helpful!"

I think the truth will come out eventually. Right now, she's putting a fake *grin* on her face to hide the shame. Overturning 18 years of strong held beliefs about the evil outside world has surely been incredibly difficult, something worthy of ex-cult members. I salute this rare occurrence in Fundie Land, even if her posts right now are still sprinkled with *smiles*, patronizing advice, and Maxwell references. 

[Koala]

My thoughts-

-Erika's readers have been far kinder to her than she ever would have been to them.  For the most part, it seems she is being offered encouragement and pleasant little quips about this being "God's path".

On the flip side, I can't tell you how many times I've watched as Erika sharply slapped down readers who suggested that public schooling was God's will for their family.

It's was 100% ungodly until Erika herself did it, and now it's all "God's good, all the time!"

-I don't feel she owes anyone an explanation about the "whys".  I actually think it's refreshing that she's respecting her family's privacy for a change.  

That said, I think she does owe her readers an apology for all of the years she looked down her nose and declared homeschool THE godly option.  She had zero sympathy for others who needed to make different choices for their children, and now she expects everyone to gather round at her feet while she tells them how being a public school mom is done.  Umm, no!  You just got here Erika.  Let some of the veteran school moms tell YOU how it's done, for a change.

It's that attitude "whatever I am doing is the only way to do it" that landed Erika in a position to eat crow in the first place. 

This is *just* like ZsuZsu.  Every OB/GYN was a pervert/reprobate until she needed one.  

[Hisey]

I also think that Karen's graduation last year may have had a role in this. (or a "roll" in this, as Erika would probably say). 

Erika has said she expected her kids to "SOAR" and that they'd be flying so high that even getting a GED would bring them down. And what happens? Karen graduates from the SOTDRT and is a receptionist at a gym. A minimum wage job with no real future. Melanie will probably have to do the same and . . .how are the kids soaring, exactly? They can save their money and go to cosmetology school or whatever, but that could take years. And that would be despite Erika, not because of her.

Meanwhile, Karen's cousins and same-age peers, who went to public school, are facing much brighter futures. Just attending high school means you are exposed to many different opportunities and options. My 11th grader has a wealth of opportunities for after graduation, simply because her high school is always sending her emails about internships, gap years, college classes, etc. Her teachers can give her recommendations to give her an advantage over the Karens of the world. Karen has none of that. Karen probably knows no one who can vouch for her academically (other than her mommy), and has spent her teen years taking care of littles. 

Even more concerning, what about when the five boys graduate? Erika and Bob need/want them to be able to learn a living. They may see that going through the SODRT -- mostly in isolation -- doesn't prepare them to begin life.

But I think Erika hopes to bring the kids home again one day. If you read her post, she uses a phrase like "for now" when discussing the public school. "For now" means, to me, that she hopes that Bob's business will improve and she can bring them back home. But I think her kids would have a fit. After you've been exposed to the fun of an elementary school classroom, with same age peers, parties, music, art and recess, it's hard to go back to two-hour Don't Talk Time, with little gates around you to remind you to stay in your spot.

The only one I worry about is Brandon. He must be in 8th grade now. He is very small for his age and (judging from the note Erika posted from him) is behind socially and academically. He seems to hang with the little kids, still calls Erika "mommy" (a word he couldn't spell), and seems very innocent and sweet. I would worry about his success in middle school with boys far larger and more sophisticated than he is.

[ViolaSebastian]

I'm of the opinion that Erika probably had to go back to work in some form, hence her refusal to say what she does during the day. She's always banged the "God will provide" drum hard, and now he hasn't provided and she's been forced to recant that mantra. I think financial difficulties played a role in her allowing Karen to have a job too. Bob must have been under terrific strain as the sole provider for eleven people and I can easily see him saying "enough is enough."  The kids are getting bigger and it must be harder to keep them all in food and clothes. She just couldn't cut corners as hard as she did when Bob was unemployed--plus it's harder to make it work with older kids the same way she did when she primarily had very young children and dieting teenage girls. 

[sta_sha]

I never thought I'd see it- the Shupettes in public school!

 I'm very curious about the forces that spawned the change. I really hope Erika shares with us eventually. I'm inclined to agree with previous posters who have mentioned that maybe Karen's GED performance was a big factor. How old is Karen? Could she go back and take some high school classes with people her age or would she have to do some sort of adult learning? It's too bad that she missed out on this opportunity. 

This is the best possible thing that could have happened to the Shupe kids who are still school aged. They have a chance at a real education as well as a chance to socialize with kids who aren't siblings. I hope they love it!

[defraudingjezebel]

My friend in the group said that someone commented on the post with the question about whether Erika will share with everyone what lead her to the decision to put her kids in public school. Her response was -and I quote- "maybe some day." 

Maybe I'm just pessimistic but to me, that sounds like she isn't planning on sharing her reasons. I agree with a bunch of other posters who think that it is related to financial issues. I think Erika either had to start working for Bob or get a job elsewhere, hence why she refuses to share her schedule. 

I know Erika has been a super judgmental jerk in the past to her readers but I sincerely hope that this situation -whatever it is- causes her to eat a bit of humble pie. I hope she realizes that many people don't have the comfort or privilege of living up to some absurdly high (and arbitrary) moral standard, and that she should NOT judge those who don't live according to her (or as she would say, God's) strict standards. 

 

[spork78]

I'm thinking that Erika had to go back to work in some form or another.

Another possibility that I thought of is that maybe one of the kids has special needs - possibly Brandon, as has been speculated - and when faced with the reality that a public school would better suit him, she decided to go ahead and enroll the rest of the bunch. Erika is notorious for assuming that what's good for one kid is good for all nine kids.

Either way, I'm glad that the Shupettes are being exposed to a wider and more liberal world view. 

[princessmahina]

I can't believe how nasty that woman was to Erika. Even more, I can't believe how nice Erika was back. Having seen Erika's bitchiness via video & print, I figured she'd have given the smackdown to poorly-educated Christian homeschooling mama.

[StepMonsterInLA]

19 minutes ago, princessmahina said:

I can't believe how nasty that woman was to Erika. Even more, I can't believe how nice Erika was back. Having seen Erika's bitchiness via video & print, I figured she'd have given the smackdown to poorly-educated Christian homeschooling mama.

*laugh* Erika has been shitty for SO MANY MANY MANY blogposts for years.  That woman wasn't nasty. She spoke truth. LFOP Sanitized Erika is not the same animal as FLOP Erika.  

Erika is not a SAHM. Erika has not all of the sudden been convicted and become humble. She has a job. IF she were at home (either working from home part time or truly being at home) she would have kept some kids home schooling and put the rest in school. 

Omg. Who schedules clean the microwave?  Boil some water. Let it hang out and get steamy. Wipe with a cleaning rag. 10 minutes start to finish IF you stand in the kitchen while the water and steam do their magic.

Funny to me that she has proven to be a hypocrite in her LFOP convictions so I expect more crap from FLOP. 

I literally clicked this thread with a bit of boredom wondering if we would ever know the truth and am pleasantly surprised!   

[Coy Koi]

12 hours ago, VaSportsMom said:

Please tell me that one of you posted the "Anna V" comment. That woman should not be homeschooling five kids.

And another comment from the same person:
 

Quote

 

Anne vasquez January 13, 2017 at 11:02 am - Reply

If we are christen raising our children for the Lord how could you put them in public school? They will be taught and exposed to many harmful things. I believe you will loose your children to the world. Anyway why don’t you get a job. How can you be a stay at home mom? You don’t have any small children at home, they are being raised by the school. I don’t agree and I would never put my kids in that situation. I hope you actually got them some new clothes and stuff for school. I used to look up to you, but now I feel sorry for your kids.

 

Why is this woman so personally offended that Erika sent her kids to public school when 1. She doesn't even know her, and 2. She has kids in public school too? Public school is fine for autistic kids but there is NO other reason it could ever be okay? She "would never put [her] kids in that situation" except that she CURRENTLY IS? This woman seems quite unstable.

[formergothardite]

1 hour ago, Coy Koi said:

Why is this woman so personally offended that Erika sent her kids to public school when 1. She doesn't even know her, and 2. She has kids in public school too? Public school is fine for autistic kids but there is NO other reason it could ever be okay? She "would never put [her] kids in that situation" except that she CURRENTLY IS? This woman seems quite unstable.

Sounds like she is repeating a lot of the things Erika has said over the years. Erika is getting a taste of her own medicine. But yeah, it doesn't make a ton of sense.

[clarinetpower]

Erika never did make sense either.

[VaSportsMom]

Why is this woman so personally offended that Erika sent her kids to public school when 1. She doesn't even know her, and 2. She has kids in public school too? Public school is fine for autistic kids but there is NO other reason it could ever be okay? She "would never put [her] kids in that situation" except that she CURRENTLY IS? This woman seems quite unstable.

That woman can't be for real. Right? You will "loose" all the kids but I hope they are wearing new clothes? Anna has to be a FJ member.

[closetcagebaby]

23 minutes ago, VaSportsMom said:

 

That woman can't be for real. Right? You will "loose" all the kids but I hope they are wearing new clothes? Anna has to be a FJ member.

 

I have a feeling it is, but I hope I'm wrong. There's no point in that. Don't break the fourth wall. 

[SamiKatz]

Anna Vasquez is NOT a good endorsement for homeschooling.  If you are fundy and can't even spell the word "Christian", then you really need to re-think your choices.

Unfortunately, she is probably an actual person and not a troll.

 

[Justmurrayed]

Everyone has said everything I could say about Erika. She deserves all the humble pie she's getting now. 

[Coy Koi]

2 hours ago, formergothardite said:

Sounds like she is repeating a lot of the things Erika has said over the years. Erika is getting a taste of her own medicine. But yeah, it doesn't make a ton of sense.

Yeah, I don't think Erika is being wronged by this woman or anything, just that the woman sounds pretty unhinged. And I think Erika does owe her readers some kind of explanation. Not necessarily an explanation of what specific circumstances changed in her life, but at least an acknowledgment that something in her thinking DID change. Because right now she still said (also in the comments on that post) that their beliefs and values have not changed, and that just isn't true. Even just something like "I realize I have a tendency to be too rigid in life and on my blog, and that's something I've been working on" would go a long way, IMO. That's not sharing ANY personal details, but it's not insulting your readers by treating them like they're so stupid they can't see something right in front of their faces. Until Erika shows some sign of not being completely full of shit, I'm not giving her any credit for this. But I am glad the kids are in school.

[Eternalbluepearl]

11 minutes ago, Coy Koi said:

 but at least an acknowledgment that something in her thinking DID change. Because right now she still said (also in the comments on that post) that their beliefs and values have not changed, and that just isn't true. 

I agree with the idea that something in her thinking HAS changed. It isn't just the idea of public school which in itself is HUGE. The girls all wear pants now.  A huge shift has occurred. Karen having a job and not just sitting at home dusting mommy's appliances is amazing too. I wonder if a reconciliation with Bob's parents could be in the works too? Anything feels possible right now. It's a whole new Shupe world. 

[mango_fandango]

How can she say her beliefs and values haven't changed?? She used to be all about skirts-only and homeschooling. In the last family album on the LFoP page, all the girls were in pants. Her kids are now in public school. 

Fundies are constantly contradicting themselves. Lori Alexander is a prime example. Erika's only doing herself a disservice by not giving any sort of explanation. She disappeared from the LFoP page for ages, deleted that photo with the comment about the kids coming home from school, and just recently mentioned that they actually are in public school, just casually in a blog post like it's no big deal. 

Reading that, I reckon Erika is ashamed somewhat. I don't know if or when we'll find out why the kids are in school, but I have a feeling that Erika did not really want to have to do this. She'd been painting the picture of having a perfectly organised house and homeschool, and now things (for whatever reason) have gone tits up. 

[Koala]

23 minutes ago, Coy Koi said:

Even just something like "I realize I have a tendency to be too rigid in life and on my blog, and that's something I've been working on" would go a long way, IMO. That's not sharing ANY personal details, but it's not insulting your readers by treating them like they're so stupid they can't see something right in front of their faces. 

I agree.  

Over the years, she has been very insulting to public school moms.  She has written endless posts about how her manner of dress is the godly manner (something about crotches and eye-traps). Her girls weren't going to be allowed to drive unchaperoned, work, etc.  

Now she is doing the very things she shamed others for doing.  And you know, I am thrilled that she's making changes, but she really owes the women she's looked down on, a GIANT apology.  

That said, I guess she's checked off all of the fundie approved boxes. 

-Presume what you're doing is the only godly thing. Check.

-Shame people who refuse to adopt your lifestyle choices. Claim they aren't rejecting you, they're rejecting God himself. Check.

-Do the very things you've shamed your readers for doing. Claim it's God's will and expect lots of back pats. Check.

-Delete the evidence / open a new blog.  Check.

-Pretend to be an expert at the new thing you're doing.  Presume the people who have been doing it all along will be anxious to hear your advice.  Check.

Somewhere in all of this there is a post or two about fundies who tell others how to do things they haven't even done themselves.

How many fundie stay at home daughters have we had tell us all about marriage and raising children?  

There's a degree of arrogance there, that's very disturbing.  Kinda like Erika prattling on about raising teenagers.  Until she had a couple...