Nathan (WAS) Courting Ashley (pt. 2)

[Fundie Bunny]

Isn't Jeb 4? If a child is not old enough to trust it with a knife by himself, axes are a big fucking old no

[HereticHick]

2 hours ago, Fundie Bunny said:

Isn't Jeb 4? If a child is not old enough to trust it with a knife by himself, axes are a big fucking old no

But but but...isn't he protected by the power of Jeebus?

[JMO]

When I saw Jeb with the ax I convinced myself that it had to be a fake one,  because what negligent moron gives their 4 yr old an ax to use?!? But I'm pretty sure it was a real one. 

[infooverload]

I wonder about the conversations which are bound to happen between Nathan and Zach. After all this is a shared experience and his older brother can offer unique insight. Since I don't have UP I don't have any idea what Zach may have said during a talking head regarding the break up.

[season of life]

1. Wow, I genuinely thought Nathan and Ashley would marry and the breakup hint was just bait. 

2. No pieces of your heart given away? Bull. From what you guys said, Nathan was crying. His heart is hurting.

3. I'm relieved at the same time because I don't want these young kids getting trapped in marriage and endless babies.

Lastly: Only Erin, Alyssa, and Michael have gone through successful courtships. Jill and Jessa as well, and only time will tell for Jinger. Josh Duggar had a terminated courtship with Kayleigh Holt, Josiah Duggar with Marjorie Jackson, Zach Bates and Sarah Reith. Now Nathan and Ashley have broken up. I really hope Zach comforts Nathan, having gone through a similar breakup.

[Purrl]

You just know the little fundy-etts will be all over Nathan now. He's been shown to be loving, affectionate, generous, considerate and kind toward Ashley. Now, with the tears, he's sure to be irresistible to so many of those young girls who see only harsh, hardhearted, stingy & spiteful men in their fathers. I bet God will be speaking to a lot of young fundy girls' hearts soon and directing them toward Nathan.

[season of life]

31 minutes ago, Purrl said:

You just know the little fundy-etts will be all over Nathan now. He's been shown to be loving, affectionate, generous, considerate and kind toward Ashley. Now, with the tears, he's sure to be irresistible to so many of those young girls who see only harsh, hardhearted, stingy & spiteful men in their fathers. I bet God will be speaking to a lot of young fundy girls' hearts soon and directing them toward Nathan.

Becky is surely going to set her sights on Nathan now. I don't even want to envision her Instagram comments about the breakup.

[backyard sylph]

20 hours ago, Fundie Bunny said:

20 hours ago, Audrey2 said:

I do see the sad irony that the Bates boys are 0 for 2 on their first courtships and the girls are 3 for 3. (Courtships that actually result in marriage.)

From the little knowledge of human anatomy i have, i'm pretty sure boys don't have precious hymens to protect

Well, I'm new to these people, but as generally capable and sweet as Nathan seems from a limited view, it's got to be harder for these guys to find women who are willing to fully embrace the...whole package, 100%. And a young woman from a more contemporary environment might think initially that it would be pleasant and old-fashioned and secure, but then realize how truly limited he plans to make her life, not to mention living under a microscope of "representing the brand." That's where we are with these people, right?

[JermajestyDuggar]

38 minutes ago, backyard sylph said:

Well, I'm new to these people, but as generally capable and sweet as Nathan seems from a limited view, it's got to be harder for these guys to find women who are willing to fully embrace the...whole package, 100%. And a young woman from a more contemporary environment might think initially that it would be pleasant and old-fashioned and secure, but then realize how truly limited he plans to make her life, not to mention living under a microscope of "representing the brand." That's where we are with these people, right?

If a girl is raised in the cult, it's probably not a big deal to marry into the Bates family because they believe the same stuff. But the whole TV show could be really intimidating for some. So I can see some girls hesitating. Because honestly, it would be uncomfortable to live your new romance on tv if you've never been on tv before. I shudder from the thought of it. 

Someone mentioned Zach possibly saying something about Nathan's broken courtship. No way. I would fall over from shock if Zach ever mentioned anything about Sarah on the show. He has the perfect family now. That's water under the bridge that he won't be talking about on tv. 

[Exjw2015deed]

53 minutes ago, backyard sylph said:

Well, I'm new to these people, but as generally capable and sweet as Nathan seems from a limited view, it's got to be harder for these guys to find women who are willing to fully embrace the...whole package, 100%. And a young woman from a more contemporary environment might think initially that it would be pleasant and old-fashioned and secure, but then realize how truly limited he plans to make her life, not to mention living under a microscope of "representing the brand." That's where we are with these people, right?

Nathan doesn't seem to be generally capable and sweet IMO. Watch the episode of Michael trying on dresses, and him saying something like "that dress looks like an old lady dress," very coldly as she just walks out. Her face looked like her feelings were genuinely hurt. It was his delivery and after the fact not taking it back. Michael seems self conscious as it is. After that I think he is Gil Jr. 

[nelliebelle1197]

13 hours ago, JMO said:

When I saw Jeb with the ax I convinced myself that it had to be a fake one,  because what negligent moron gives their 4 yr old an ax to use?!? But I'm pretty sure it was a real one. 

If something happens to my Jeb I will drive three hours north and smack that Fingerhut mock turtleneck off Gil Bateseses fake neck.

[backyard sylph]

11 minutes ago, Exjw2015deed said:

Nathan doesn't seem to be generally capable and sweet IMO. Watch the episode of Michael trying on dresses, and him saying something like "that dress looks like an old lady dress," very coldly as she just walks out. Her face looked like her feelings were genuinely hurt. It was his delivery and after the fact not taking it back. Michael seems self conscious as it is. After that I think he is Gil Jr. 

Sure, if he wasn't controlling to some degree, he wouldn't have run that girl off. (Obvs speculation.) But I think in general terms, anyone's good points can be nurtured over the not-so-good points. I like to think that of these young people. Realistically, I know it takes more getting out into the broader world to make some of that happen, beyond Clown College, etc. I compare them to my own kids, though, around these older ones' ages, and entertain optimism on their behalves. Behalfs? Whichever.

[formergothardite]

The Bates have always been super slack with child safety, but giving a four year old an ax?!  Have they just given up pretending they care about their children? 

[JillyO]

6 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

The Bates have always been super slack with child safety, but giving a four year old an ax?!  Have they just given up pretending they care about their children? 

But, but... he is a manly man-child. Ax-wielding is what manly man-children do. Arrrrr!

[FlamingFundie]

Id like to comment on Kelly's choice to put up the pic of Nathan and Ashley.

Could it perhaps have been her passive-aggressive plea to the couple that they should try again/harder? Like, "remember the good times!" I only say this because my BIL and his GF had this happen on a grander scale-- they broke up but my MIL's entire family continued to keep the ex-GF involved in all the family doings and events in hopes that they would rekindle. They have (several times now...) but Im hoping for selfish reasons they are finally done this most recent time.

At any rate, Im kind of hoping that was Kelly's reasoning rather than $$$. Not sure which one is worse though.

[Dandruff]

I think Kelly's reasoning was for $$$s, and that they (Gil, and Kelly) had known that things weren't working out for some time.  IMO, Nathan didn't seem entirely comfortable during the New York trip.  Part of it could have been shyness, or being a bit overwhelmed by the big city, but I noticed that Ashley was talking over him and touching him to the point where he was gently pushing her away.  Those aren't behaviors that I can see any son of Gil being willing to accommodate long-term.  I do think they loved each other, and were compatible in some important ways, but not others; e.g., city vs. country.

My strong suspicion is that Nathan broke off the relationship.  I didn't pick up discomfort from Ashley, and she apparently thought things were OK to the point where she had thought he was about to propose.

[Palimpsest]

3 hours ago, backyard sylph said:

Well, I'm new to these people, but as generally capable and sweet as Nathan seems from a limited view, it's got to be harder for these guys to find women who are willing to fully embrace the...whole package, 100%. And a young woman from a more contemporary environment might think initially that it would be pleasant and old-fashioned and secure, but then realize how truly limited he plans to make her life, not to mention living under a microscope of "representing the brand." That's where we are with these people, right?

Well, I don't know how sweet or capable Nathan is (and TBH, the Bates young men are pretty interchangeable to me and none of them strike me as particularly charming) but the whole package must be intimidating.

It's not just IBLP/ATI religious stuff, it is indeed representing the brand and probably the whole Reality TV issue doesn't help.  I'm sure the young Bateses and Duggars attract some people for the wrong reasons.  A fame whore might agree to a courtship just because they want to be on TV.  A nice but shy person might reject a courtship because they don't want to be on TV.  A courtship could start - and the person could drop out as soon as they got a good look at the Reality TV contract.  In addition, some Fundie fathers might reject a courtship outright because they don't want their daughters being filmed giving birth and disapprove of TV altogether (see Steve Maxwell and The Beast!)

Granted, I've never seen an UPTV contract but the ones that have been leaked from Bravo and TLC have been iniquitous.  I couldn't imagine selling my privacy and complying with that sort of controlling contract for any amount of money.  They do indeed sell their souls to unReality TV.

And my guess is that Ashley was the one to break it off - but that is pure speculation.

[Thorns]

Maybe we will get a Duggar - Bates crossover, with Nathan and Josiah having a heart to heart about feels and heart pieces. 

Or maybe People could do the same with Ashley and Marjorie. I would totes read that for snark

[season of life]

Maybe Ashley will write a book like Marjorie.

[Nashville92]

48 minutes ago, season of life said:

Maybe Ashley will write a book like Marjorie.

Doesn't she sing?  I'd count on a CD.  I actually felt bad for him.  Who wants to spill their broken heart on TV? 

[season of life]

8 minutes ago, Nashville92 said:

Who wants to spill their broken heart on TV? 

That shows the negatives of allowing your lives to shown on air. Everything, including the embarrassing or sad times, is filmed for anyone to see. 

[formergothardite]

9 hours ago, Nashville92 said:

Who wants to spill their broken heart on TV? 

The bad thing is that at some point Kelly addresses how difficult for it was for Zach to go through a public courtship failure, Yet they are willing to allow all their children to suffer that humiliation just to make money. 

I do think that the courtships shown are going on considerable longer than they want people to know, which explains why Ashley thought it was a marriage proposal. They had probably been courting for some time already and that whole courtship proposal was for the show. I'm guessing Gil and Kelly wait till they are confident that the courtship will work before allowing the person on the show. But there is always that risk that the person is going to bolt and a Bates is going to have his/her broken heart turned into entertainment for others. 

[Mela99]

So what do you think Gil and Kelly's reaction was to Nathan/Ashley having issues? Would they encourage them to pray, to read their bibles or to actually learn to compromise? Would they tell Nathan he needs a submissive wife and if she can't do that, Jesus wants him to marry someone else? Would they tell Ashley her feelings don't matter? Genuinely would like to be a fly on the wall for this.

[season of life]

36 minutes ago, Mela99 said:

So what do you think Gil and Kelly's reaction was to Nathan/Ashley having issues? Would they encourage them to pray, to read their bibles or to actually learn to compromise? Would they tell Nathan he needs a submissive wife and if she can't do that, Jesus wants him to marry someone else? Would they tell Ashley her feelings don't matter? Genuinely would like to be a fly on the wall for this.

I don't think Gil and Kelly wanted a breakup to happen, even if it would lead to Nathan finding someone he loved, like Zach with Whitney. I assume they told Nathan to pray and try to figure something out because I don't believe for a second they would take the situation into account and realize the courtship wouldn't work out. I think Ashley and Nathan ended it because they knew they weren't compatible and now Kelly's trying to cover it up by saying, Oh, they can be pals now, they didn't end up having sex like dating heathens.

[Melissa1977]

On 2/7/2016 at 0:04 AM, Fundie Bunny said:

Isn't Jeb 4? If a child is not old enough to trust it with a knife by himself, axes are a big fucking old no

I don't want to sound hypocrite, because I won't give an ax to 4 year old neither to a teen, but I've met country children that can use sharpy tools, even axes, or cook in the stove, of course fully supervised. I'm a contemporany urban mother and probably overprotective, but I understand that children are able to do much more than they're doing nowadays.

Anyway, probably Bates children are raised near fire weapons, so maybe using an ax (supervised) is not a big deal for them.