What is going on at the Maxwells?

[SolomonFundy]

6 hours ago, anjulibai said:

And yet, we've never heard that wonderful pizza cutter trick for cutting lettuce!!

 

Sarcasm aside, here's some things they could post about that would actually be interesting while at the same time promoting themselves:

1) A day in the life of Melanie, NR Anna and/or Elissa. They chould show how the schedule their days and how they remain productive. 
2) Any sort of discussion of the jobs the guys have. We know they do more than is posted, we just don't really know why they don't post about it. Might as well get free publicity. 
3) Abby's homeschooling. They could talk about what she's learning and how she's progressing. I'm sure she's not doing a ton of projects, because this is the Maxwells, but it'd still be interesting to see how she's doing. She is 8 now, she's well into elementary school. 
4) The daily schedules of Sarah, Anna and Mary. Talk about what they do all day. 
5) Show some more of Mary's artwork. How is she progressing? Is she taking any classes? Trying any new techniques? 
6) Some actual recipes that are not stupid like that layered salad or the burrito filling or tortillas. They do have recipes for more complicated casseroles, they just don't really share them. 
7) Pictures and pictures and pictures of the grandkids spending time together. Seriously, people love that stuff. They seem to be aware of that, but they don't show the kids together as much as they could. 
8) Specifics about how Sarah is training Ellie. Like, what tricks is she teaching, how is Ellie progressing, that sort of stuff.

Any of those would be interesting to read, while at the same time being totally in keeping with their statement mission of the blog. 

They've teased some of this stuff in the past, but never followed through. Anna-Marie has contributed a couple of times here and there, and it seems obvious that she was intended to do more. Nothing consistent has ever come of it.  My personal opinion is that AM's brand of regimented time management and anal retentiveness out-Steves even Steve himself. She probably just doesn't want to be bothered with something that isn't directly essential to running her home/kids/wifely duties. As to pimping the grandkids, they are definitely aware of the potential there, just seemingly unable to follow through with any regularity. Bethany's picture being plastered on the new edition of KOCH is a good example of their awareness of the value of using the kids commercially. Then there is the seemingly abandoned "Young Presenters" video series they started 6 months ago. 

I think that some of it is internal factors (meaning the "real" Maxwell family), and some is external (the in-laws and other false Maxwells). Steve is a vain and self-righteous man. He probably still clings to the notion that people look at he and Teri with their daughters and sons still at home, and see a couple in their prime with dutiful, well-trained children at their heels. The Maxwell enterprise is grinding to a halt in large part due to Steve's inability to recognize that his immediate family no longer looks like anyone's ideal. Nobody aspires to be an aging parent to a brood of adult children who never leave home, and consider family burrito time to be the height of hilarity and fun. Ten years ago, he was poised to show the world how his perfectly raised children could be released upon Heathen America to raise up an army of arrows for Jesus through hard work and appropriate marriages. Now, he's creepy Old Man Steve, who skulks around the family compound and encourages his 34-year-old virgin daughter to prayerfully consider getting a puppy to fill the multitude of voids in her life. 

Handing the keys to the empire over to the younger generation would underscore a lot of these deficiencies, particularly if the comparison would make the main Maxwell household look even more stagnant by comparison. 

[nokidsmom]

6 hours ago, SolomonFundy said:

<snipped>

I think that some of it is internal factors (meaning the "real" Maxwell family), and some is external (the in-laws and other false Maxwells). Steve is a vain and self-righteous man. He probably still clings to the notion that people look at he and Teri with their daughters and sons still at home, and see a couple in their prime with dutiful, well-trained children at their heels. The Maxwell enterprise is grinding to a halt in large part due to Steve's inability to recognize that his immediate family no longer looks like anyone's ideal. Nobody aspires to be an aging parent to a brood of adult children who never leave home, and consider family burrito time to be the height of hilarity and fun. Ten years ago, he was poised to show the world how his perfectly raised children could be released upon Heathen America to raise up an army of arrows for Jesus through hard work and appropriate marriages. Now, he's creepy Old Man Steve, who skulks around the family compound and encourages his 34-year-old virgin daughter to prayerfully consider getting a puppy to fill the multitude of voids in her life. 

Handing the keys to the empire over to the younger generation would underscore a lot of these deficiencies, particularly if the comparison would make the main Maxwell household look even more stagnant by comparison. 

To the bolded:  ITA.  And it seems that Steve messed up his chance to show ebil America to how to do it right.   Ten years ago, people could buy in, the children were younger, even Sarah still at home at the age of 24 would not look weird.  Nathan was already married and there was still time for the others to find spouses.    But it seems that Steve could not practice what he preached.   Not only for his own narcissistic needs but his system of how to raise a godly family probably eliminated a lot of potential spouses.  We know about Christopher's first failed engagement and Joseph's "wedding that didn't happen".  I still believe Sarah has had her share of suitors and her single status today is because of Daddy.  She has seemed too down in the past, especially after turning 30, for me to believe that she's really happy with being single and stuck in the Maxhell compound.    I think she really thought that at 34, this would not be her life, but here she is. 

It seems completely logical that their conferences have ground to halt.  I don't believe for a moment that there hasn't been an increasing WTF factor coming from their audiences over what they preach.  Also there's other options to their product that weren't available now.  I believe this "family integrated church" thing is another idea of Steve's to continue preaching his worldview and feeding his ego. 

The Maxwell kids, along with the Arndt manboys, are a sad example of how parents can totally fuck up their children's lives and be totally delusional about the damage being done.

 

 

[anjulibai]

@SolomonFundy and @nokidsmom, those are some great points. Steve's need for control makes them unable to actually do anything. He is so demented and it's so sad for his children. 

[Jana814]

Steve has the kids so scared of the outside world that none of them realize what he had done is wrong. The only thing he cared about is guarding their hearts. I think Sarah would make a wonderful mother but because of her father she can't find any man. 

[socalrules]

Sarah is 34? I thought she was closer to 31 or 32 for some reason. Maybe it just seems so old to be stuck in that lifestyle, just waiting for tomorrow to be different. Maybe the thought of Sarah is just stuck in time for me since nothing in her world ever changes. As many regrets I have as to things I expected to have done by now or things I did do, at least my own choices brought me here. Sarah, and many other fundy women, are waiting for their dads to decide it is time to start a new chapter in their lives. At what point does the patience run out? And when it does, they will keep sweet as though everything is as God commanded.

[Dandruff]

Where would Sarah or the other Maxwell daughters be expected to find husbands?  Hasn't family travel been curtailed due to lack of interest in the conferences?  And if a family they knew had a marriageable son, wouldn't something have likely happened already?  I'm pretty sure that fasting and praying won't result in Mr. Right appearing with a bible and a smile at their front door.

[mango_fandango]

I know we've discussed this before, but I think Steve is much more relaxed about getting his sons married than the daughters. One of the main criteria is having your own house. With John and Jesse, he can make sure that they have one within Leavenworth/in the same road as the others. The wives have to be under their headship, and ultimately John and Jesse (like the others) will be under Steve if they're all still in the same road. With the girls, they will be under their husband's headship. Their husbands could do whatever they fancied. If say Anna's husband wanted to up sticks to, I dunno, Wyoming, there is nothing Steve could do. It is, and would be, much easier for the Maxwell boys to remain controlled by Steve than for the girls. Leavenworth is not a huge place. I can't imagine Steve being able to find three guys in Leavenworth who'd fit his criteria, or three guys willing to move to Leavenworth. I know we can all say that if Steve has any sense he'd let at least one of the girls marry, but we all know he hasn't. Plus, as we all say, where on Earth are the girls going to even meet husbands??? 

[goldbu]

On a whim I decided to see what's new with Swift Otter. They have updated their page and added a blog, with entries from today. No mention of Jesus, and their "about" page actually contains humor (and mentions Jesse's preference for black coffee, of course). It says that Joseph speaks at conferences around the country "to do his part in building the developer community." Is this a reference to the Maxwell conferences, and is a huge stretch, or does he actually speak at other conferences? 

[kpmom]

1 hour ago, goldbu said:

On a whim I decided to see what's new with Swift Otter. They have updated their page and added a blog, with entries from today. No mention of Jesus, and their "about" page actually contains humor (and mentions Jesse's preference for black coffee, of course). It says that Joseph speaks at conferences around the country "to do his part in building the developer community." Is this a reference to the Maxwell conferences, and is a huge stretch, or does he actually speak at other conferences? 

Oh wow.  They've come a long way from their "saved by the blood of Jesus" days.

They've even gotten rid of the mention that they are all related and Steve is their dad, which they previously had in their bio page.

Between Joseph's glasses (glasses??) and the line in his bio that he plays great guitar (no mention of Christian hymns only) it's almost like they're going for a hip vibe.

Well as hip as the Maxwells can be anyway.

[Jana814]

3 hours ago, Dandruff said:

Where would Sarah or the other Maxwell daughters be expected to find husbands?  Hasn't family travel been curtailed due to lack of interest in the conferences?  And if a family they knew had a marriageable son, wouldn't something have likely happened already?  I'm pretty sure that fasting and praying won't result in Mr. Right appearing with a bible and a smile at their front door.

Steve has such ridged rules when it comes to men for his daughters that its impossible for them to find anyone.  

[molecule]

I finally got tired of waiting and decided to try the pizza cutter trick for cutting lettuce. I was so overwhelmed by the experience that I forgot to take pictures. (Okay, not really. I just didn't have my phone on me so I could take pictures.)

It actually worked really well for deveining romaine lettuce. It took me a few minutes to get the hang of using the pizza cutter to cut the lettuce into bite-size pieces for my large nutritious salad that even Lori Alexander would deem acceptable. As long as I wasn't trying to cut too many lettuce leaves at once, it worked pretty well. It was easier than tearing or using a knife, and I'll probably try it again. It did create something of a mess, although that is more about me than about the pizza cutter.

Take that, Maxwells.

[rural juror]

Speaking of websites, I found this while looking at the Maxwells' Linkedin profiles:

http://bluegrasspiano.com/

Jesse's website on playing bluegrass piano.  Wonder what the point of it is, he's not actually selling any services.

[anjulibai]

11 hours ago, rural juror said:

Speaking of websites, I found this while looking at the Maxwells' Linkedin profiles:

http://bluegrasspiano.com/

Jesse's website on playing bluegrass piano.  Wonder what the point of it is, he's not actually selling any services.

Ministry, maybe? They seem to think only bluegrass is holy (well, except for maybe Handle's Messiah). 

 

There's a new post up. Steve and Teri took the ABCD kids to the park for Grandparents' Night. It seems they hadn't done it in a while, but wanted to start it up again. Hmm, wonder why they couldn't schedule this in on a regular basis? Sarah came along, in order to take pictures. 

Anyone else think they are only starting this up again so they can post it to the blog? 

I also noticed that Steve only appeared in shots with Drew also in them. 

[bertnee]

I like that the Swift Otter's portfolio lists Titus 2 - 

Quote

 

TITUS2.COM

Titus2.com is a ministry for encouraging families in Jesus Christ. We had the blessing of being able to migrate them from their own in-house shopping cart to Magento. Their existing cart was not built for maintainability, and they were pushing the boundaries. Magento is rock-solid, easy to use and very maintainable.

 

 

[usmcmom]

Quote

 I tagged along with them to the park to take pictures, and yes, I ended up playing with the kids too.

Love,
Sarah

In other words, "Take THAT, Free Jinger!! I do TOO play with the kids. I DON'T just stand around giving orders and snapping photos!!"  *puts hands on hips and sticks out tongue*

[HermioneSparrow]

5 hours ago, anjulibai said:

Ministry, maybe? They seem to think only bluegrass is holy (well, except for maybe Handle's Messiah). 

 

There's a new post up. Steve and Teri took the ABCD kids to the park for Grandparents' Night. It seems they hadn't done it in a while, but wanted to start it up again. Hmm, wonder why they couldn't schedule this in on a regular basis? Sarah came along, in order to take pictures. 

Anyone else think they are only starting this up again so they can post it to the blog? 

I also noticed that Steve only appeared in shots with Drew also in them. 

That's because boys are the only grandchildren that matter to Steve, girls are just fillers to their quivers.

[kpmom]

6 hours ago, bertnee said:

I like that the Swift Otter's portfolio lists Titus 2 - 

 

 

6 hours ago, bertnee said:

TITUS2.COM

Titus2.com is a ministry for encouraging families in Jesus Christ. We had the blessing of being able to migrate them from their own in-house shopping cart to Magento. Their existing cart was not built for maintainability, and they were pushing the boundaries. Magento is rock-solid, easy to use and very maintainable.

It's so weird the way they word this.  It's as if they came along and helped  this Titus2.com company move from old, outdated software, when it was the Swift Otter guys themselves who built the original site!!!!

[FloraKitty35]

23 hours ago, kpmom said:

Oh wow.  They've come a long way from their "saved by the blood of Jesus" days.

They've even gotten rid of the mention that they are all related and Steve is their dad, which they previously had in their bio page.

Between Joseph's glasses (glasses??) and the line in his bio that he plays great guitar (no mention of Christian hymns only) it's almost like they're going for a hip vibe.

Well as hip as the Maxwells can be anyway.

 

From left to right I see as characters from The Simpsons: Smithers (Jesse), Old Gil (Steve), Lenny (Joseph), & Carl (the Caucasian version) (Chris)

[SPHASH]

Bethany wore this shirt and Grandma at Grandpa's night.  Read what it says.

 

 

Sorry Bethany your dad is not.

Looks like they went to a playground at an ebil elementary school.  They hate public school yet use their playground equipment.

Yes Steve is showing his favortism again.  

What the hell is this:

Quote

Abby and I doing whatever those things are called.

Gee Sarah can't you show any less enthusiasm?

[princessmahina]

22 hours ago, molecule said:

I finally got tired of waiting and decided to try the pizza cutter trick for cutting lettuce. I was so overwhelmed by the experience that I forgot to take pictures. (Okay, not really. I just didn't have my phone on me so I could take pictures.)

It actually worked really well for deveining romaine lettuce. It took me a few minutes to get the hang of using the pizza cutter to cut the lettuce into bite-size pieces for my large nutritious salad that even Lori Alexander would deem acceptable. As long as I wasn't trying to cut too many lettuce leaves at once, it worked pretty well. It was easier than tearing or using a knife, and I'll probably try it again. It did create something of a mess, although that is more about me than about the pizza cutter.

Take that, Maxwells.

I'm so, so happy someone finally told me how to do this. I've been barricaded in my house with rotting lettuce and pizza cutters for months waiting for the Maxwells to update their blog. 

/Maxwellsnark. Would it really have been difficult for them to post it? It only took molecule one paragraph. Or perhaps they could have made a video. I'd like to see some more of those **excellent** conversational skills. 

[mango_fandango]

We're coming to the end of this thread. I propose "A Whole Lotta Nothing: What's Going On At The Maxwells? Part Two" or something. 

Back to topic: I don't know what those things Sarah and Abby are playing on are called either, but it just sounds so half arsed the way Sarah puts it.

[anjulibai]

1 hour ago, kpmom said:

 

It's so weird the way they word this.  It's as if they came along and helped  this Titus2.com company move from old, outdated software, when it was the Swift Otter guys themselves who built the original site!!!!

That is weird. I'm guessing they really don't have a lot of customers, so they have to do this to pad their portfolio. It's really sad and pathetic. 

[molecule]

It only took molecule one paragraph.

To be fair, my one paragraph is longer than most of their blog posts.

[CyborgKin]

Quote

We had the blessing of being able to migrate them from their own in-house shopping cart to Magento.

Wow, what a blessing!  I mean, what a convoluted manner of phrasing!

[Granwych]

On ‎6‎/‎5‎/‎2016 at 10:43 PM, molecule said:

I finally got tired of waiting and decided to try the pizza cutter trick for cutting lettuce. I was so overwhelmed by the experience that I forgot to take pictures. (Okay, not really. I just didn't have my phone on me so I could take pictures.)

It actually worked really well for deveining romaine lettuce. It took me a few minutes to get the hang of using the pizza cutter to cut the lettuce into bite-size pieces for my large nutritious salad that even Lori Alexander would deem acceptable. As long as I wasn't trying to cut too many lettuce leaves at once, it worked pretty well. It was easier than tearing or using a knife, and I'll probably try it again. It did create something of a mess, although that is more about me than about the pizza cutter.

Take that, Maxwells.

I'll  raise you one up with using my quilting rotary cutter....(just kidding, far more likely to draw blood)