Dillwalds at ALIVE

[DeFrauder]

It is possible to be casually dressed, but still look good for the occasion.

[halcionne]

It was a bloody music festival; do you guys really expect them to be wearing business casual?! :?

I don't wear pyjamas on the plane but I do wear trackie bottoms (sweatpants to the 'Mericans here) and a hoodie... I've done enough transatlantic flights to know that restrictive clothing is just a bad idea! I don't think that anyone who's ever made the mistake of wearing jeans on a long haul flight would complain a about someone wearing PJs! :lol:

My daughter slept through the night at 8 weeks (ebf and no sleep training); unfortunately she decided to stop that after 2 weeks and is still waking up multiple times at night at 7 months, argh! Almost think I'd rather not have been reminded of what real sleep is like for those 2 precious weeks... Anyway, back to Jill: I'm pretty sure she's still breastfeeding, just look at those bazongas!

I mostly agree with this. Jessa and the husbands looked fine to me; Jill wore what she always wears--cheap jersey knits. IMO, denim is the obvious choice for a concert. If you're speaking at a Christian version of Coachella*, dress like a Christian hipster. I actually felt like Jessa's outfit was pretty close to that aesthetic, but the skirt was too long.

*I had to google to remember the name of this festival, during which I learned there are a couple of christian music festivals coming up in New Jersey. I wonder if the Seelards will be invited...

[bal maiden]

They aren't musicians.

They weren't part of the paying customer base/audience.

They were working- paid speakers.

Yes, I would expect them to dress accordingly.

But part of dressing accordingly is dressing appropriately for the event at hand, no? Business casual attire at a music festival, even as a speaker, would be laughably out of place, In the same way a maxi skirt and flip flops would be wrong in a board meeting...

[bal maiden]

It is possible to be casually dressed, but still look good for the occasion.

This is a good and sensible point :wink-kitty:

[SassyPants]

It is possible to be casually dressed, but still look good for the occasion.

I agree.

My biggest complaint is that it seems they only have "a" set of clothes and they wear them no matter the venue or activity involved. Flip flops to work a farm, or to go hiking, immediately comes to mind.

It's as if no one taught them to dress for an occasion or an activity.

NO, JB/M were not and are not good parents. Good parents impart knowledge, lots of it. Not those 2.

[DGayle]

Babywise and Baby Whisperer, are basically parenting books. They both teach a similiar method to help the baby get into a sleep routine and it is nothing barbaric or harmful, they do not teach anything like blanket training. I think in Babywise, the routine is Eat-Play-Sleep.. it's really just a routine that parents can use to help their child get on a sleep schedule.

The AAP recommends STRONGLY against Babywise because of the elevated risk a baby can become malnourished. Babies need to be fed when they're hungry, not told at midnight that they have to wait until the next scheduled feeding at 8am until 8:10am. Babies need to be allowed drinks when they're thirsty, not left to cry all night. People like to talk about how all this works, but all that's happening is babies learning that their parents won't be there, so why bother crying when wet or hungry. It's heartbreaking, and it's neglect.

[Handmaiden of Dog]

Who was saying they had to wear "business casual"? I'm talking about wearing sharp, attention-getting clothes. The sort of clothes their audience was wearing but better tailored and suited to their body types. Color and cut are important. Styling is important. You cannot look like you just picked some random shit off the rack at TJ Maxx and expect people to take you seriously. They want to make a living as professional speakers but they don't look professional and they don't look prepared. They look like random people from the audience.

At this point their name is only going to take them so far. If they want to make enough money from public speaking or to build these small gigs into a full time family ministry then they are going to have to work at it. I don't think they want it bad enough.

[SassyPants]

Who was saying they had to wear "business casual"? I'm talking about wearing sharp, attention-getting clothes. The sort of clothes their audience was wearing but better tailored and suited to their body types. Color and cut are important. Styling is important. You cannot look like you just picked some random shit off the rack at TJ Maxx and expect people to take you seriously. They want to make a living as professional speakers but they don't look professional and they don't look prepared. They look like random people from the audience.

At this point their name is only going to take them so far. If they want to make enough money from public speaking or to build these small gigs into a full time family ministry then they are going to have to work at it. I don't think they want it bad enough.

They feel entitled- the show and all that went with such aided in that process.

Professional speakers? I could see Jessa giving advice on hair styles and Ben on exercise or weight lifting.

Derick needs to go back to being steady Eddie working in a cubicle in some small business.

Jill- maybe working in a church run daycare.

[DGayle]

I can't even remember exactly when my son started sleeping through the night, but that was a lovely thing when it happened.

My girls are 6. Mild special needs. They sleep 4 hours maximum, 2x/day. If I'm lucky, it's at the same time. Good thing this mama also doesn't sleep much. But if it's different times, their dad will work from home if he can so I can get sleep. I will be lovely if they ever sleep all night.

[DGayle]

Because in the media world, presentation is important. If you have ever watched a news broadcast you would notice that the folks involved are usually nicely dressed and coiffed. Why do people in the media world get their makeup professionally done before they go on air? In my job I had a specific outfit to wear in the workplace, and when these folks are "working" most usually dress the part.

Outfit should match venue and activity. It's just common sense.

It also shows respect for the event. If you dress inappropriately, it shows you don't care enough to put the time into preparing.

This goes both ways. If you're going to a video game conference and get up there is a snazzy 3pc suit to talk in front of a group of geeks in jeans and t-shirts with their favorite games, that's not appropriate. I was taught the general rule of thumb is dress a notch above the audience you're speaking to, not several notches, not below, not at. A notch above.

[DGayle]

We have no idea whether Jill is trying for another baby and no right to know either.... :shock:

She was raised quiverful, has drunk so much koolaid that she sweats it, and has a covenant marriage dedicated to "all the kids god brings," in a family where the value of women is having as many kids as they can. I would be shocked if she's not maximizing her chances.

[DGayle]

Sadly, I am getting used to seeing people in their pyjamas at the grocery store or even on a plane for that matter. But who cares if if you look like a slob when all that matters is comfort? :roll:

There is, honest to god, a trend right now of looking dirty. Pajamas and shiny face (I'll be honest- people who go out in public in this shit look like junkies who can't he assed to get dressed), and now "teased lashes."

http://www.marieclaire.com/beauty/makeu ... mar&dom=fb

Maybe I'm getting old, but I remember learning how to carefully separate my lashes and not get mascara all over because clumps and smudges look like you don't bother bathing.

I think this spoken trend is a way to make laziness trendy and acceptable.

[DGayle]

I was being kind about their bridesmaid dresses since technically they bought them for the event. I've complained about them on another thread and people disagreed. But you're right, those dresses were bad. The jersey knit dresses did not match the formality of the gowns. Further we've seen Joy bumming around TTH wearing Jill's bridesmaid dress. Wearing a bridesmaid dress again should mean you could wear it to a dinner or a nice brunch/lunch not pushing the Lost Girls on a tire swing.

But will give the Duggar women points for at least buying something for the occasion.

They weren't bad-bad. They were too casual for a non-casual wedding. Jessa's jersey dresses looked almost identical the bridesmaid dresses an aunt of mine picked for her wedding (#2) on her ranch, and they paired well with cowboy boots, if that tells you how not fancy those dresses are.

I'd wear either dress as a guest at a wedding, or on a lunch date with hubs. Bridesmaid dresses they are now.

But I also give points because at least a clear effort was made.

[DGayle]

As someone of their generation I have to say that comfort is really important, my clothing varies depending on the setting (yes I do dressy too) but it's always bought with comfort in mind. Why? There's enough negative stuff going on, I don't want an extra stress that I can easily eliminate. What I wear doesn't effect anyone else so why factor in other people's opinions when choosing it.

I highly doubt this is why the duggar girls dress the way they do but you made a general comment.

Would you wear your dress-down clothes when you're a paid speaker? Something I think the younger gen is not learning is how what you wear helps send your message or breaks it. This goes for everyday stuff, and triply for when you're doing business, and a speaking engagement is business.

[VelociRapture]

They weren't bad-bad. They were too casual for a non-casual wedding. Jessa's jersey dresses looked almost identical the bridesmaid dresses an aunt of mine picked for her wedding (#2) on her ranch, and they paired well with cowboy boots, if that tells you how not fancy those dresses are.

I'd wear either dress as a guest at a wedding, or on a lunch date with hubs. Bridesmaid dresses they are now.

But I also give points because at least a clear effort was made.

I didn't find the dresses as bad as a lot of people did. Were they perfect for the occasion? No, but they were far better than they could have been. Maybe its because I'm thinking of the type of reception they had more than the type of ceremony though - Jill's dresses especially seemed fine for an outdoor, more laid-back type of summer reception.

I do give them both credit for making the attempt though; its always tough trying to pick a dress that looks good on a bunch of different people and that everyone will like.

(Spoiler Alert: anyone who is or will be planning a wedding soon - give your Bridesmaids a color and fabric then let them pick whatever dress they want. I did that this past spring and it was so much easier for everyone that way!)

[Mela99]

I'm here solely to say I thought the topic said "Dillwads" and was immediately full of Beavis and Butthead thoughts and commentary.

:character-beavisbutthead:

Carry on.

[HarleyQuinn]

Who was saying they had to wear "business casual"? I'm talking about wearing sharp, attention-getting clothes. The sort of clothes their audience was wearing but better tailored and suited to their body types. Color and cut are important. Styling is important. You cannot look like you just picked some random shit off the rack at TJ Maxx and expect people to take you seriously. They want to make a living as professional speakers but they don't look professional and they don't look prepared. They look like random people from the audience.

At this point their name is only going to take them so far. If they want to make enough money from public speaking or to build these small gigs into a full time family ministry then they are going to have to work at it. I don't think they want it bad enough.

I said that and I stand by it. You get paid to speak, you'd better suck it up and dress professionally.

[Rescinded and Mended]

I will agree that there is some truth to the idea of (some) younger people needing to know the appropriate form of dress when making an appearance at certain events.

I took a college class a couple of years ago. One day, the 19-year-old young woman who sat behind me came to class wearing a very racy blouse that showed lots of skin. She looked as if she was going to a club later that night. She told me that she was interviewing for a job position immediately after class, and that she wanted to look really nice.

She told me later that the business didn't hire her. I'm not sure that it ever occurred to her that she might have improved her odds of getting the job if she had dressed more appropriately for the interview. This is personal anecdata - I don't know how she behaved during the interview. I am assuming that her appearance could have been a factor here, but I don't wish to imply that all younger people think or dress this way for interviews. I would simply agree that there is a time and place for certain types of apparel, and that it's important to think that through before attending an event.

[amers]

My third child started sleeping all night at 8 weeks. It was just her natural way, I did nothing to promote it. So may be Izzy is too.

[19 cats and counting]

I haven't been to Christian concert/paid-speaker events in YEARS, but even when I was going it would have been weird for a speaker to show up in business casual.

I have gone to Walmart in pajamas. People can judge me. :lol: But I'm not in the Duggar generation, I'm much older.

There's a whole website devoted to people who show up at Walmart in pajamas (or worse) so as long as you don't make that site you're forgiven :-)

[CorruptionInc.]

There's a whole website devoted to people who show up at Walmart in pajamas (or worse) so as long as you don't make that site you're forgiven :-)

We used to get "Walmart People" emails here in Aus about 10 years ago... last time I got sent a chain email like that probably was 10 years ago too!

[Nic]

I said that and I stand by it. You get paid to speak, you'd better suck it up and dress professionally.

Agreed. There are ways to up your dressing game while still matching the setting.

Music festival doesn't equal put no thought into it. As for comparing them to musicians, (even though they aren't) I guarantee you all the professional music acts have specific stage clothes that they wear only on stage. They put together a look. It may not look that way to the audience, but the clothes are very purposely selected. Even the musicians understand it's a business, and they need to look professional and clothing is part of the package.

If it looks like they just got off the couch, they start at a disadvantage bc it makes people wonder what kind of effort they took to prepare. I'm assuming that's why they do the Q&A format (w an "interviewer" not the common masses) because that requires less preparation or creating an engaging presenation. I'm not sure if they have it in them to create one-- they only have their stock answers.

[curlykate]

Me too, curly kate! Cosleeping and nursing side lying saved us. I'm pretty sure my son didn't sleep through the night (fully through the night, not the 5-hour definition) with any regularity until 20-22 months. He self weaned at 23 months and sleeps through the night exclusively now. A new one on the way in 5 weeks and I'm terrified remembering how tired I was!! :shock:

Congratulations on your pending birth! I hope your new little one decides to sleep better than your first! My first slept better than this. I remember being exhausted, but nothing like I am this time! We have been co-sleeping/side nursing part time, however I have a bad back, and that just makes it ten times worse. Nights we co-sleep, I can barely move for the rest of the day! Due to our pillow top mattress, LO has to sleep in my arms, or it's not safe for him. I'm literally stuck in the same position all night long and it's killer.

However, back to topic....

To the poster who mentioned that no one must have taught them to dress accordingly....there was a pic posted by either Josh or Anna months ago of Josh, Anna, JBoob and DQ with another couple. They seemed to be at a black tie affair. Josh, Anna and the other couple were dressed appropriately, the Boob was wearing a suit, and DQ was in her black skirt,many blue/green shirt combo. They looked so out of place! If they're that unaware of how to dress accordingly, it's no wonder their children are the same!

[curlykate]

https://instagram.com/p/yiu6PCOWAO/

Found it! This is from Josh's Instagram. JBoob and DQ look so out of place in this photo, at what is obviously a black tie affair.

[feministxtian]

https://instagram.com/p/yiu6PCOWAO/

Found it! This is from Josh's Instagram. JBoob and DQ look so out of place in this photo, at what is obviously a black tie affair.

Boob and DQ are horribly underdressed for the occasion. Damn, even I (the forever underdressed redneck) knows how to dress for certain occasions. I've discovered that living here in the desert SW, things are a LOT more casual...a dress, no hose and sandals work for almost any occasions except for incredibly professional (executive level) or black/white tie events.