Adeye upset at clinic practicing sound medicine

[LittleOleMe]

Well, that's one way to spend 7 or 8 thousand dollars helping kids.

bc helping kids in other parts of Africa have access to clean water isn't a necessity. Neither is making sure the kids in homeless and domestic abuse shelters have food and something like a coat or a stuffed animal to call their own. And let's just ignore the dozens of starving children who go to bed hungry and only get food through subsidized breakfast and lunch programs at school bc dad is a deadbeat and mom is working two or three jobs just to keep the lights and the heat on. Or maybe dad is there and he's working two or three jobs as well, again just to keep the lights and the heat on. Bc helping children who are already here and in need, especially when they'll never know it was you, isn't nearly as important as making sure we adopt a couple of embryos.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

Jesus won! He gained four precious children–finally freed from the test tube and now united in heaven.

So why not just unplug all the freezers then?

None of the "logic" of this "Jesus wants me to do this, everything is in his plan, it's all foretold, nothing is chance" that Adeye continually spouts makes any sense to me.

[LittleOleMe]

So why not just unplug all the freezers then?

None of the "logic" of this "Jesus wants me to do this, everything is in his plan, it's all foretold, nothing is chance" that Adeye continually spouts makes any sense to me.

Bc those test tube babies are waiting for families to adopt them. Obviously. But if god wants them right now, then an electrical shortage or something will happen and they go right to heaven. Otherwise they're waiting around for the right time to grow into humans and be devoted followers of christ. :roll:

[whoviana]

It is hard enough for me to follow anti choicer logic when it comes to women hosting fertilized eggs in their fallopian tubes, 9-12 days before they even attach. I totally don't know what is the deal with the frozen ones. But apparently, those corn grenade shaped bunches of cells in the freezer also have a soul attached to them. Right.

[anjulibai]

Wait a minute .. she's been in touch with the biological mother of the embryos all this time? And this woman is thankful that she no longer has to think about them every day and wonder what will become of them?? If this woman wanted her embryos so badly then why didn't she find a clinic with "staff that valued life" and transfer them herself? And why would Adeye even have her contact info? I admit I'm clueless when it comes to this embryo adoption thing, but when you can't contact your sperm donor and even organ donors don't have contact with their recipients, I find it odd that embryo donors would have contact with the people intending to adopt the embryos.

How does embryo adoption work? Do you have to legally adopt them once their born? Since the woman is physically giving birth, it is just assumed it is her child? Can the biological parents attempt to claim "their" child later? Why does this even exist? Why would anyone create embryos if they don't intend to transfer them? I mean they can freeze eggs and sperm and just make the embryos when the time comes. And they can just opt out of genetic screening if they want to. And isn't it safer to freeze eggs and sperm than embryos? They last longer and generally survive the thaw when they're just sperm and egg versus embryos don't they??

I read a story about a couple that had two kids through IVY and some left over embryos. They couldn't afford to go through the process again, but also didn't feel they could just dispose of the embryos.

So they went through an agency that found another couple whose eggs and sperm were of too low quality to work with IVF, but wanted to experience pregnancy. They worked out some sort of contract/paperwork through the agency and lawyers, transferring the ownership of the embryos from the first couple to the second couple.

The second couple had the embryos implanted and had a baby. Since the second mother gave birth, she was legally the mother per the birth certificate; the second father was named on the birth certificate.

They two families apparently keep in touch and get the kids together regularly, because they want the siblings to have a relationship.

All the legal stuff occurred at the time of the transfer of ownership of the embryos.

[mystikchick17]

I believe when she first posted about this harebrained scheme, she said there was some medical/personal reason the bio-mom couldn't carry out the implantation as planned, so she gave them to the adoption agency.

Poor Haven. She's finally going to school, in a small, contained class, with trained special educators who are helping her, and now that's all going to disappear. And not be in the least bit traumatic for her. Nope. Because Jesus. :angry-banghead:

[LilMissMetaphor]

Now the Salems are asking for $30,000 just to send them to SA. :pink-shock:

[Lissa1481]

Now the Salems are asking for $30,000 just to send them to SA. :pink-shock:

Is that the yearly support they want?

[LilMissMetaphor]

I could be wrong, but I think that is just to get them there. So, not even to help the poor little Godless orphans.

[Lissa1481]

Reading it again, I think that it's the yearly support needed for them to live in S.A. so it would cover their rent and groceries and other living expenses. It is common for missionaries to have supporters, since they aren't working a job where they get paid. I think they just want to have the support ready before they go, hence the "30,000 in 30 days." You don't pay it all at once you make a monthly commitment.

[ILoveJellybeans]

I feel bad for their poor kids, especially the one who doesn't talk, she was going to school and getting outside interaction, and was making progress and now she has that taken away from her.

[DGayle]

So why not just unplug all the freezers then?

None of the "logic" of this "Jesus wants me to do this, everything is in his plan, it's all foretold, nothing is chance" that Adeye continually spouts makes any sense to me.

Does an embryo who goes to heaven get to rung through the grass and play and sing like a sick child?

[LilMissMetaphor]

Reading it again, I think that it's the yearly support needed for them to live in S.A. so it would cover their rent and groceries and other living expenses. It is common for missionaries to have supporters, since they aren't working a job where they get paid. I think they just want to have the support ready before they go, hence the "30,000 in 30 days." You don't pay it all at once you make a monthly commitment.

Yeah, I don't know. Maybe somebody better than me at Googling flights can find out how much it would cost to fly two adults and at least four teenagers (which reminds me...do they have to go by the kids' actual ages for flight tickets? Maybe I'm being an asshole here, but if I had a seventeen year old the size of a five year old I would hate to pay adult prices for them??) plus five littles from...where are they now, Colorado? to South Africa? I'm thinking it would be a shit ton of money?

[Lissa1481]

Yeah, I don't know. Maybe somebody better than me at Googling flights can find out how much it would cost to fly two adults and at least four teenagers (which reminds me...do they have to go by the kids' actual ages for flight tickets? Maybe I'm being an asshole here, but if I had a seventeen year old the size of a five year old I would hate to pay adult prices for them??) plus five littles from...where are they now, Colorado? to South Africa? I'm thinking it would be a shit ton of money?

Colorado yes. I think they are in Fort Collins. When they were given the van awhile ago, it was a dealership in Greeley. I'm curious now, I'll go Google prices.

[Lissa1481]

I'm getting Between 800 and 1200 per person, but that's out of New York and DC so they'd have to fly from DIA to somewhere else first. Also I'm only seeing adult prices. But I'm not trying very hard. Maybe buying that many tickets you can get a discount?

[Rowan]

Yeah, I don't know. Maybe somebody better than me at Googling flights can find out how much it would cost to fly two adults and at least four teenagers (which reminds me...do they have to go by the kids' actual ages for flight tickets? Maybe I'm being an asshole here, but if I had a seventeen year old the size of a five year old I would hate to pay adult prices for them??) plus five littles from...where are they now, Colorado? to South Africa? I'm thinking it would be a shit ton of money?

I'm going to Namibia this summer (borders South Africa, and you transfer through Johannesburg SA) and my round-trip ticket from either of two possible major cities is going to be $2,500-$3,000 for me. So $30,000 will pay for the flights if they get round-trip (I don't see them doing that) and not much to set them up once they get there.

[DaffyDill]

There is just something so manic with women like Adeye and Tonya Ferguson. Even the Rodrigueseseses with their RV.

They fling themselves and their families into these ridiculous situations; Jill R and Tonya with the "We shall give up our worldly goods, sell/leave the house and live in an RV!" thing, and Adeye with her bouncing from collecting disabled adoptees, to implanting someone elses embryos, to leaving America altogether to start an orphanage in S Africa.

All because....well, Jesus. What is wrong with them? And I could be wrong, but the husbands of all three seem to just bumble along and agree with all this rubbish, that anyone in their right mind can see is ridiculous at best, or doomed to fail at worst. All three really are cases where someone needs to step in and "think of the children".

Why do they all do it? Some kind of Christian fundy one-upmanship perhaps? Everyone is trying to be more Christian than the next?

[dairyfreelife]

I did a quick search for the hell of it because flight prices can be quite expensive. It only allowed for a max of four minors with two adults, but they have a youth 12-17 and child 2-11 tickets. I did two youth and two child tickets and put the date as June 1 (no idea when they are going, it was just a date a couple months away leading to better costs). Total cost is $8311 and the flights are very long. But they have four more children and one more youth, so yeah, it will be quite expensive. I had a feeling it would be about $1000-1500 per person because bf and I have looked up flight prices from east coast U.S.A to southern India and it's about that much as well if you book early enough. However, I did a one-way for them and ours is a roundtrip so ours was a little bit more ($1300-2000 average price and would take a car/train for about 4-5 hours to his town as we'd save about $3000-4000 per person doing that-seriously, an extra 45 minute flight away and the cost increases from $1500 to $5500, what the ever living hell is that about).

Anyway, it is going to be quite the expense just getting them all there. That's what happens when you have nine children and decide to move on the other side of the world.

[Maggie Mae]

I'm getting Between 800 and 1200 per person, but that's out of New York and DC so they'd have to fly from DIA to somewhere else first. Also I'm only seeing adult prices. But I'm not trying very hard. Maybe buying that many tickets you can get a discount?

I've never been on an airline that had children's prices. You pay for the seat. If you have a child in the lap, that costs less (free?), but IME, seats cost the same. The only exception off the top of my head is the free seat some airlines give to "persons of size." If you need a second seat and aren't fat, (e.g. for equipment) you have to upgrade to first class, and pay a cargo fee.

[LilMissMetaphor]

There was a point (at least once I remember for sure) where my daughter's ticket was 75% of an adult ticket, between Asia and Canada, can't recall the airline though.

[tankgirl]

We have done international flights with children and it is common for these types of flights to have discounted under 18 prices. But you don't tend to see it on basic rate, domestic flights as much.

[Idolatry]

That adventure in embryo land was probably around 5K, just for the medical part, not even including the Snowflake people and the travel. My clinic is 4K without meds. Sounds like someone is not being wise steward.

[Maggie Mae]

We have done international flights with children and it is common for these types of flights to have discounted under 18 prices. But you don't tend to see it on basic rate, domestic flights as much.

I didn't even think to check anything other than my few preferred airlines. Thanks!

[salex]

I've never been on an airline that had children's prices. You pay for the seat. If you have a child in the lap, that costs less (free?), but IME, seats cost the same. The only exception off the top of my head is the free seat some airlines give to "persons of size." If you need a second seat and aren't fat, (e.g. for equipment) you have to upgrade to first class, and pay a cargo fee.

Actually, in the USA, if you are a person of size most airlines have policies that require payment for the second seat, though it might be refunded if the flight is not full.

[2xx1xy1JD]

There is just something so manic with women like Adeye and Tonya Ferguson. Even the Rodrigueseseses with their RV.

They fling themselves and their families into these ridiculous situations; Jill R and Tonya with the "We shall give up our worldly goods, sell/leave the house and live in an RV!" thing, and Adeye with her bouncing from collecting disabled adoptees, to implanting someone elses embryos, to leaving America altogether to start an orphanage in S Africa.

All because....well, Jesus. What is wrong with them? And I could be wrong, but the husbands of all three seem to just bumble along and agree with all this rubbish, that anyone in their right mind can see is ridiculous at best, or doomed to fail at worst. All three really are cases where someone needs to step in and "think of the children".

Why do they all do it? Some kind of Christian fundy one-upmanship perhaps? Everyone is trying to be more Christian than the next?

The frustrating thing with Adeye is that her best quality is also her worst.

I genuinely think that she's got a big heart. Unlike some other adoption blogs that terrify me and give the impression that the kids are just unsaved demons, she seems to actually love her children and she's accepting of their special needs. She's sees kids that are suffering and that desperately need a home, she feels distressed and she needs to do whatever she can to make that happen. She and her husband pushed themselves beyond their comfort zone to adopt all the kids and take on kids with extreme medical needs. Maybe you do need to be a bit irrational to do that - quite frankly, I haven't fostered or adoption even though I know there is a need in my community, because it would be disruptive to my family. They had the mindset that they would push through logical obstacles to love and care for children, and with a child like Hasya, the transformation has been stunning.

So, I can't call this impulse to feel deeply and be moved to help wrong. It's actually quite awesome. It just needs to be balanced with some sense of reality and self-preservation and recognition that she really can't do it all, and that's the piece that's missing. If she were to say, "I can't save the entire world by myself, but I can be the best mom to my children here and continue to inspire others on my blog and draw attention to conditions in foreign orphanages", she could do an amazing job. If she burns herself out, though, at some point she won't be able to continue to help her children.