Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles

[tralala]

This popped up on my tumblr dash. Apparently a mother wanted her children to enjoy the wonders of Harry Potter, but teh ebil witchcraft thing was kind of getting in the way.

So She wrote her own version. It just screams of fundie theology. Or of being an excellent troll fic. Social Theory based fanfic is all the rage right now in potter fandom. I've seen samples from Ayn Rand and Marxist social theories and they are friggen hilarious.

There's a sample and a link in this post http://owlithe.tumblr.com/post/97482992 ... es-so-this

[Marianne]

It's a troll, please tell me it's a troll :shock:

[Ivycoveredtower]

I don't want to read it and taint Harry Potter :naughty: but I have to wonder why she would want her children to enjoy Harry Potter if she's against a giant chunk of the story and how does she know it's wonderful. did she read the books or watch the movies. Naughty naughty. :evil:

[sassycupcake]

Troll in the dungeon

[IronicallyMaeve]

Here's the FF.net link:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10644439/1 ... d-Miracles

[Ivycoveredtower]

Okay I broke I read it I laughed because it's so stupid. :ew: she couldn't even get Harry's eye color right. or really anything about the books right but I mean the eye color who the Hell changes Harry's eye color. (Yes I am aware that in the movies the actor does not have green eyes That always bothered me) Anyway back on point I really want to write a nasty review to her like really bad but I think I'll refrain though she has almost 400 reviews I really want to read them. :lol:

[DGayle]

I managed to read it. To rant or to laugh, that is the question. She is as offensive to other Christians and non-Christians as out pet fundies, but her writing style (all right, lack of one) and her misunderstanding of the books is pretty funny. I feel bad for her kids.

[Firiel]

Are we sure Lori didn't write this? :shifty-kitty:

[Ivycoveredtower]

Are we sure Lori didn't write this? :shifty-kitty:

That would be hilarious but aren't her kids all grown up and her grandkids to young to read Harry Potter?

[Firiel]

That would be hilarious but aren't her kids all grown up and her grandkids to young to read Harry Potter?

Maybe new daughter-in-law Emily wants to read Harry Potter. :P

[heidi]

I think this is a parody. It's too over the top to be real.

"Hello, neighbor! I was wondering if you had been saved," Hagrid exclaimed brightly; and tipped his wide-brimmed, straw cowboy hat.

I mean...that's..that's something all right.

Edit: In chapter 3 Reverend Dumbledore greets Harry and since he has a "southern twang" Harry instantly "knew in that moment that the Reverend was a man of God."

[DGayle]

I think this is a parody. It's too over the top to be real.

I mean...that's..that's something all right.

Edit: In chapter 3 Reverend Dumbledore greets Harry and since he has a "southern twang" Harry instantly "knew in that moment that the Reverend was a man of God."

Reverend Dumbledore and his wife Minerva McGonagall are the parents of Hermione Granger, who is to sweet and holy to be interested in a career like those hussies in Sex and the City. Really, that's the example given.

[PennySycamore]

What the everlovin' fuck did I just read? That was horrible!

Yeah, I was curious about the reference to SATC, as well. And what's with fun dies and calling children "little ones". They do it almost to the exclusion of saying children or kids.

[Soulhuntress]

Is that crap a joke? :o :pink-shock: The reviews were epic

[crazyforkate]

99% sure this is a joke - just a hunch that it's winking at me the entire time. It just feels too lighthearted. Still the weirdest thing I've ever read, though.

[Ivycoveredtower]

99% sure this is a joke - just a hunch that it's winking at me the entire time. It just feels too lighthearted. Still the weirdest thing I've ever read, though.

Okay admit it which on of the FJ'rs did it. :dance: :lol: Seriously though the reviews are golden though 500 wow I mean yes 99% of them are flames but 500 reviews for three chapters good or bad that's hard to do.

[DGayle]

What the everlovin' fuck did I just read? That was horrible!

Yeah, I was curious about the reference to SATC, as well. And what's with fun dies and calling children "little ones". They do it almost to the exclusion of saying children or kids.

You're using something with autocorrect, right? I love how fundies autocorrects to fun dies. It's appropriate.

[DGayle]

Okay admit it which on of the FJ'rs did it. :dance: :lol: Seriously though the reviews are golden though 500 wow I mean yes 99% of them are flames but 500 reviews for three chapters good or bad that's hard to do.

4 chapters now, and I just passed most of my evening reading the reviews.

[Ivycoveredtower]

4 chapters now, and I just passed most of my evening reading the reviews.

Okay I write on Fanfiction a lot and so I can say with almost certainty that she is not getting PM's at least not good ones and certainly not 3 good ones for every bad review. If people want to say something they will leave a review. Pm's are mainly used for asking when updates will come or asking questions they forgot about in the review. . they are hardly ever used as a review tool. Plus she does realize that Harry Potter doesn't live in America right?

[DGayle]

I don't think she's ever read the books, so I don't think she knows it's British. I also don't believe she's getting scads of bright PMs. Why not post those publicly and back her up?

[Ivycoveredtower]

I don't think she's ever read the books, so I don't think she knows it's British. I also don't believe she's getting scads of bright PMs. Why not post those publicly and back her up?

You read many of the reviews. I just skimmed the first page or so. Was there very many positive ones?

[browncoatslytherin]

seriously? what's the point of sharing harry potter with her kids if she completely changes everything? smh, i really really hope this is a troll. the only thing that makes me doubt it is unfortunately similar drivel i've read on ff.net. -.-

[Gerialc]

My favorite part is when Aunt Petunia say that Harry doesn't need God/Hogwarts/religion because, "he has science and socialism and birthdays." :lol: (even though I'm sure it's a Poe)

[FundieFarmer]

It's a troll, please tell me it's a troll :shock:

Writing fanfic- thought you ought to know! *Faints of how bad the story is*

So many inappropriate semi-colons! SOTDRT has failed this lady.

[Firiel]

I would say this is a Poe for sure, but...

I mean, The Eye of Argon exists.

And people like Lori Alexander exists.

It's possible that those two situations could collide and produce this. I mean, it's not very likely, but it's more likely than the .000000000000001% chance that an abused woman would read Lori's blog and feel she is obligated to subject herself to abuse. And that actually happened.

Edit: Eye of Argon, in case you were wondering (link not broken because no point to it): http://www.ansible.co.uk/misc/eyeargon.html