The Truth About Ruth - Part 4

[Arete]

I think it speaks volumes for #1) a father being able to win sole custody of the children, and #2) the court allowing him to move across state lines with them. That tells me Our Lady of Possums is some very bad news, and some very well documented bad news. Courts will rarely award full custody to a father except in very extreme cases.

[wild little fox]

I'm not saying PM is the woman named in the ABC news colum (the one who "died" and then came back alive.) It was interesting to trace her back to her poetry. On the site there were slightly lukewarm comments and then there were ones, none were anonymous, that were gushing. They looked like socks to me.

[ShesCrafty]

I think it speaks volumes for #1) a father being able to win sole custody of the children, and #2) the court allowing him to move across state lines with them. That tells me Our Lady of Possums is some very bad news, and some very well documented bad news. Courts will rarely award full custody to a father except in very extreme cases.

Yeah, that struck me as odd too. It's unusual for a father to be awarded sole custody over the mother, especially when the mother was the stay at home parent. But to then be allowed to move them 2,000 miles out of state? The judge saw something he or she didn't like about The Possum to allow that unusual situation.

[nokidsmom]

Yeah, that struck me as odd too. It's unusual for a father to be awarded sole custody over the mother, especially when the mother was the stay at home parent. But to then be allowed to move them 2,000 miles out of state? The judge saw something he or she didn't like about The Possum to allow that unusual situation.

Exactly. This tells me that there are a lot of issues at play.

[Stephanie66]

Aren't divorce records in California public? (Or only in cases of celebrities...where maybe some immoral court clerk leaks them?)

[ShesCrafty]

Aren't divorce records in California public? (Or only in cases of celebrities...where maybe some immoral court clerk leaks them?)

I thought so too, though I'm having a hell of a time finding that info. If someone who is a better Google detective than I am could point me in the right direction, I would really appreciate it :D .

[nelliebelle1197]

A lot of divorce and custody records are sealed to protect children

[lizziesmom]

Yeah, that struck me as odd too. It's unusual for a father to be awarded sole custody over the mother, especially when the mother was the stay at home parent. But to then be allowed to move them 2,000 miles out of state? The judge saw something he or she didn't like about The Possum to allow that unusual situation.

Do we know what state the divorce proceedings took place in? Yes, it would be unusual to permit the children to move from California to Chicago but maybe Dad filed suit in Illinois. Also, aren't the two younger children teenagers? Judges often will take input from teens about the custodial parent.

[Burris]

On the other hand, the "false flag" business is puzzling. Does Calladus suspect the former husband of implicating his friend PM in all these personalities? From Scarlett to Jayhawkgirl, to Penn Mommy to Ruth. Why would people at FJ or even GDNNOP bother to go along with such a plot? That would be too weird for words.

I found myself wondering what it would take to set up a “false flag†operation against PM.

The answers are time, money, motivation, know-how, and intimate knowledge of the target’s itinerary.

The perpetrator of such a scheme would, among other things, have to ‘spoof’ PM’s IP addresses not only at her own place but as she travelled.

I don’t know all that much about how IP addresses are assigned or when they change, so I asked my husband about it. (I still don’t understand all of what he said, so I could be messing up here.)

He says an internet service provider can assign the user with a static (unchanging) IP address or a dynamic (changing) IP address. (Our provider has a dynamic address system, but our address usually stays static. We’re located in Alberta and the IP reflects that regardless of whether or not a new one has been randomly assigned by the ISP.)

Each individual computer on a network has its own IP address, but all computers on a network – there are three at out place: His desktop, his tablet, and my laptop – will likely be assigned just one IP address on the internet because all of them are behind the same firewall and using the same modem.

A person could do one of the following if she wishes to impersonate me by using my IP address:

* She could ‘spoof’ the IP address – a 12-digit code made from four sets of three numbers - after having learned precisely what it is from (a) working as a moderator on FJ or Blogger, etc. or (b) directly accessing or hacking into an ISPs server.

* She could access the internet from our place or by using our wireless network.

It’s far more likely that one person could end up signing into a place such as FJ with two different IP addresses in one day, even while using the same connection, than it is for two different people to sign in using one IP address (unless they both access the site using the same internet connection).

(Click here and here for more fun with PM and IP addresses.)

Someone who wants to frame PM would have to either know her IP address(es) or have access to her personal network.

Wow. She must have really pissed someone off.

PM says she has a form of Lupus so terrible that sun-sensitivity once confined her to the bedroom because the UV light coming through windows in her house would cause her to ‘flare up.’ She collected a large sum of money for the installation of UV filters on her windows.

Awhile later, PM posts a new picture of herself in daylight without hat or protective clothing. Only when asked about this oddity – a picture that appeared on Photobucket, and well away from the site where she collected donations - did she claim to be taking a new medication.

This medication is so incredible that someone with severe sun sensitivity can now spend several hours a day in direct light without protective clothing.

She doesn’t brag about this scientific innovation on her blog, however, but only talks about what a lot of people would see as a medical miracle after someone asks her how in hell she managed to suffer through that picture.

It’s common knowledge who PM is. She has linked the PM blog to her own legal name several times in print.

Then there’s Ruth – daughter from a prominent QF family that absolutely no one, over four years, can identify even despite its patriarch being a speaker at ATI conferences.

In looking over Ruth’s blog entries through TAR, I don’t think it’s all that apparent for someone reading them singularly to see a major problem.

When looking at them all together, however, there’s a pattern: Ruth is absolutely surrounded by people who mistreat her and, despite her being a single female student, she cannot find suitable free counselling or financial aid or even a stable room to rent. Her bosses all suck. Her coworkers at a new job are bitches who make fun of her for bringing lunch from home.

Ruth also lies on her blog, for example about the names of her siblings. These lies aren’t meant merely to hide her past or protect her identity. They aren’t the sorts of lies that would serve that purpose.

Someone who wants to protect her identity would lie about her name, her birth place, her birth date, and her criminal record but probably not about whether or her siblings’ names all began with a specific letter.

Ruth lies about the names of her siblings – not in revealing or hiding what they are, but rather in claiming outright that her family gave the children ‘R names’ and were more creative about it than the Duggars. (Eventually she reveals a different set of names entirely, most of which do not begin with R.) It’s an odd lie because it doesn’t really serve any purpose.

Her family than appears on the blog to attack her, but they have enough consideration for her privacy to use the pseudonym she created without any comment on the matter. (She didn’t edit their posts; she claimed to be unable to either block or remove the posts at all.)

She has siblings who left the movement, but none of them can provide her with so much as a garage to park the car where she lives – in service to neutrality, even despite their having left a faith system where one is either for or against it without any middle ground. (And her siblings who left are struggling financially, but will not take board money from the sister who is homeless and working two jobs. Everyone in Ruth’s life is such an asshole.)

Can all that happen to one person in a short space of time? Oh hell yes.

Could that separate person have the same travel itinerary, at the same exact time, as a suspected scammer whose blog deals in part with religious mistreatment and QF? That seems a lot less likely.

I think Calladus is still in denial that his friend PM could be guilty of being Our Lady of Many Personalities. She is a complete victim to him, surrounded by evil people and far-fetched plots against her. He has bought PM's story hook, line and sinker and really doesn't want to believe that he was scammed. He may be wavering though.

I feel sorry for him.

I think maybe Calladus believes PM is his friend – a friend acquired while his late wife was still alive. I feel bad for him, too.

As for the idea it could be PM calling this guy in the middle of the night, I’d normally think not – but with this one, I…

[FiddleDD]

If it looks like a duck, sounds like a duck, quacks like a duck.... It's probably a duck.

[okayobee]

I think it speaks volumes for #1) a father being able to win sole custody of the children, and #2) the court allowing him to move across state lines with them. That tells me Our Lady of Possums is some very bad news, and some very well documented bad news. Courts will rarely award full custody to a father except in very extreme cases.

Not just a father but a step-father to the two oldest! That's really unheard of. The courts almost always favor the mother in custody battles. They must have found her to be very unfit.

[lizziesmom]

Not just a father but a step-father to the two oldest! That's really unheard of. The courts almost always favor the mother in custody battles. They must have found her to be very unfit.

My understanding is that the two oldest are adults. There would be no custody issue regarding them, only the minor children. Dad is their biological father.

[longskirtlotsakids]

It is not hard at all to read the courts hearings findings.

Google Kern Co CA circuit court. Search under her name. The hearings findings are clickable. She did get vacation visitation, and was found by the court to be capable of earning minimum wage.

[Mama Mia]

Not just a father but a step-father to the two oldest! That's really unheard of. The courts almost always favor the mother in custody battles. They must have found her to be very unfit.

Her ex husband adopted the two eldest children, so his status is exactly the same as a biological parent.

I know it is more common for the mother to receive custody, however it really isn't rare for fathers to gain custody.

In my work in social services we averaged about 10% single dads. 50% single moms and 40% couples - and couples are frequently one biological parent and their partner/spouse.

In addition to fathers having custody because the mother was drug addicted, or mentally ill or had disappeared or was otherwise unable to care for the children, we also worked with many women who lost custody simply because the kids dad had more money and a lawyer. Of course those are just the conflicted cases, most families figure out the custody arrangement reasonably peacefully based on what works best for their family.

I have no idea what possom momma s custody issues are, but I wanted to point out that the assumption that the mother is nearly always the custodial parent really isn't accurate. It's an assumption that kind of bothers me, because it assumes that mothers are by default the better parent, when many women just aren't all that maternal, and that most men don't make good single parents, when many do.

[ShesCrafty]

Do we know what state the divorce proceedings took place in? Yes, it would be unusual to permit the children to move from California to Chicago but maybe Dad filed suit in Illinois. Also, aren't the two younger children teenagers? Judges often will take input from teens about the custodial parent.

My understanding is the divorce took place in California and it was quite awhile after it was finalized that that the ex husband moved to Illinois. I also thought it was the two oldest who were teenagers and the two younger children were preteens. Someone please correct me if I'm wrong, it's a lot of information and I'm having a hard time keeping it all straight!

[Stephanie66]

Given RR's (now ex) husband's employment (available through the court records and a google search), I am going to take a leap and assume she never needed the money. At least not when she was married to him.

It might be wrong, however, to assume she is capable of minimum wage employment. Even McDonald's has standards.

The records are available here: http://www.kern.courts.ca.gov/home.aspx ... PEN&p1=Top

ETA: Pick family law, then put in her real last name. Hers is the only one that comes up.

Also interesting? She uses illness a LOT to delay the divorce proceedings. Sounds like the judge got a tad fed up with it. And that he had to pay her over a grand in child support, even though she had the kids one day a week and every other weekend. She also got alimony. Why shouldn't she be paying HIM child support?

It sounds like she agreed to allow him custody back in 2009 and didn't really object to him taking the kids to Chicago. It was just a formality to go through the courts to decide jurisdiction. Her child support went way down. (Although I still don't understand why she is getting any)

[okayobee]

Just read the latest on Calladus' blog and PM has convinced him she is the victim of a false flag attempt to tie her to another online identity, presumably RR. Ok, so let's say that's true. One (known scammer) PM is being set up to look like RR (why RR?, who knows). If that's true why hasn't RR posted at all? If she is indeed a different person wouldn't she have posted something? Why did she scrub her posts? If she's real there's no need. Or is her (PM) belief that this other person RR is another scammer? What are the odds? One scammer linked to another scammer - for what purpose? Especially when PM has been outed as perpetrating another person previously - PennMomma. Are we to believe she changed her ways?

Using the same link above you can also get the records to her first marriage. That info coupled with some other info out there (seriously, crumbs ALL OVER the web) indicates:

Married to husband #1 from 1995 to 3/2000 (filed in 8/1999)

Married to husband #2 from 7/2000 to 11/2009 (filed in 4/2009)

She didn't waste much between husbands!

She received child support from Husband #1 and child support and alimony from Husband #2. Husband #2 also paid her attny fees until the judge put the kabosh on that later in the proceedings.

Want to bet that RR's shaing of the tip jar coincides with these court proceedings??

[Arete]

MrsS2004, my dad was the sole custodial parent. So I do not come with a prejudice that single men can't make great parents, because I know they can. However, the fact he was able to go cross country with the children tells me something more is in play here than poor little PM didn't have a good lawyer. Granted I am talking about NJ and NY, but moving out of state tends to be a line judges do not let custodial parents cross easily here.

Also, the statistics you provide show that fathers are sole custodial parent in only 10% of cases. Once again, I don't think women have some innate ability to be a better parent, but sole paternal custody is a minority situation.

[Burris]

Want to bet that RR's shaing of the tip jar coincides with these court proceedings??

May 24, 2013 - court record:

MINIMUM WAGE IS IMPUTED TO RESPONDENT/[redacted]; THE COURT FINDS RESPONDENT HAS THE ABILITY TO EARN AT LEAST MINIMIM WAGE.

June 2, 2013 - RR blog:

TAR Record

The last entry on the PM blog is from late April.

[Whipple]

Or a sociopath who claims that she adores her children and would do anything for them, really doesn't and would relinquish them easily in exchange for her freedom. She probably treats her children the same way she does everyone else. Like chess pieces, having no regard for their needs, only her own.

I've been thinking a lot about Ruth's lies lately. I don't want people to feel bad that they gave $. My sister, who is a con artist of the highest order, was so good that even those familiar with her pathological lying could be conned and conned again. I am terrible at telling whether she is lying because she is that skilled at earning my sympathy. The only thing I could do is analyze what she did after the fact and the common thread I found is that sister always went too far with her stories and gave additional information that was not necessary and slightly over-the-top. Sometimes there is a pause in her voice when she realizes that her lie has worked but again, I don't catch the pause until later when I am scratching my head. My other sibling was told by a psychologist that said sister is dangerous and to stay away. That is the strategy we are using now--safe.

Luckily these people are few and far between.

[Stephanie66]

I couldn't find her first divorce, but it really does appear that she didn't fight the custody or move to Chicago. She might have fought the child support and alimony (she *still* gets child support, even though the kids are in Chicago!) but she didn't fight at all for the kids. Of course, this could have been because she knew she couldn't win.

It appears as though she did get a psych assessment, but the psychologist also said she gets the "right of first refusal" if the kids needed a sitter, so the doctor didn't find her dangerous or anything.

[polabear]

It's hard to tell how much fighting there was from the court proceedings. They did some to an agreement, but a lot can happen between the filling and the agreement. Also the original custody arrangement was pretty close to 50/50, which is typical these days. The changes came later.

Pm gets a little bit of child support because of how CA calculates child support. Mainly, they look at both parents income, the amount of time the children spends in each home, and then come up with a figure. Since pm makes nothing, and her ex presumably makes a fair amount, she gets a small support payment. Not all states work that way.

[Stephanie66]

This is veering off topic, but when I got divorced, my ex had no legitimate income. The courts decided he was capable of earning a certain dollar amount based on his previous income and education level, and that's how they determined his child support. I had the bigger burden, as I was actually employed with insurance and all that, (I think it ended up being 65% to 35%) I don't understand how I would have had to pay him money under any circumstances. (He had the kids one night a week and every other weekend. I think those expenses were calculated into the child support. Like they said I had the kids 26 days a month and he had them 4 days a month)

[polabear]

This is veering off topic, but when I got divorced, my ex had no legitimate income. The courts decided he was capable of earning a certain dollar amount based on his previous income and education level, and that's how they determined his child support. I had the bigger burden, as I was actually employed with insurance and all that, (I think it ended up being 65% to 35%) I don't understand how I would have had to pay him money under any circumstances. (He had the kids one night a week and every other weekend. I think those expenses were calculated into the child support. Like they said I had the kids 26 days a month and he had them 4 days a month)

It totally depends on the state. In IL, the non-residential parent pays a set percentage of their income towards child support, depending on the number of children. So, my husband sends his ex about 1200 a month, even though we have his son about 45% of the time. It looked like from the court record that once PM's ex was in IL, he tried to transfer the chidl support case to IL. IF that had worked, PM would have been on the hook for 32% of her net imputed income, since she has 3 kids under 18. CA minimum wage is 8 dollars an hour. At the worst (assuming she filed single, one deduction), she would have owed her ex 341 a month.

In CA, there is a nice big form to fill out to figure out child support:

https://www.cse.ca.gov/ChildSupport/cse ... nv_id=none

[hathorlive]

It’s far more likely that one person could end up signing into a place such as FJ with two different IP addresses in one day, even while using the same connection, than it is for two different people to sign in using one IP address (unless they both access the site using the same internet connection).

Or it could just be that two people who have no connection are using the same vpn service, that allocates certain locations/ip's from a range. Example, my coworker and I were commenting on a web article. He was in Kentucky and I was in Michigan. However, we both were using the same VPN service that made my posts appear from London England and he connected to the Chicago option. So, you can basically fool anyone you want, just by having enough locations with your VPN service. RR wouldn't have gotten caught if she'd kept track of what character was where and used the appropriate VPN connection to give it credibility.