The Truth About Ruth - Part 4

[Stephanie66]

That's what I am saying...I would have no idea, based on just a blog, if her drama is real or not real. I have friends in real life who have REAL drama, not manufactured. (One had a friend die and now is raising her teenaged daughter. Another had her son hit by a drunk driver and get a severe brain injury. Neither one has blogs, though. Or tip cups. They just do it.) I don't blame anyone who believed RR's stories because life happens. People can break their leg, then break their leg again. Then lose their job for breaking their leg. (I had to resign my job for getting cancer. Thankfully, I can afford to, but what about people who can't?) Poor people, in general, are a very vulnerable population. Their cars break down more. They lack health insurance, so they get sick more. I have read huge parts of RR's blog since this happened and, in all honesty, the only parts I really found suspect were the adoption to a lesbian couple and the behavior of her employer when she broke her leg. And I was really confused about the whole buying a trailer and then getting evicted thing. (If she owned the trailer, why didn't she just move it if the landowner got upset?) And I am looking at it in hindsight.

And Louisa03, I am sorry your family are being assholes. No one needs to get kicked when they are down.

[Kellbells]

'It seemed as if she had a wall of protection around her in her supporters who seem to be absent now.'

Responding to the one sentence from above: don't you mean umbrella? :)

Carry on.

[Mama Mia]

That's what I am saying...I would have no idea, based on just a blog, if her drama is real or not real. I have friends in real life who have REAL drama, not manufactured. (One had a friend die and now is raising her teenaged daughter. Another had her son hit by a drunk driver and get a severe brain injury. Neither one has blogs, though. Or tip cups. They just do it.) I don't blame anyone who believed RR's stories because life happens. People can break their leg, then break their leg again. Then lose their job for breaking their leg. (I had to resign my job for getting cancer. Thankfully, I can afford to, but what about people who can't?) Poor people, in general, are a very vulnerable population. Their cars break down more. They lack health insurance, so they get sick more. I have read huge parts of RR's blog since this happened and, in all honesty, the only parts I really found suspect were the adoption to a lesbian couple and the behavior of her employer when she broke her leg. And I was really confused about the whole buying a trailer and then getting evicted thing. (If she owned the trailer, why didn't she just move it if the landowner got upset?) And I am looking at it in hindsight.

And Louisa03, I am sorry your family are being assholes. No one needs to get kicked when they are down.

That's funny that so many people found the trailer story suspicious. It's one of the parts I found most believable. I work in an area of social services that often involves people having housing issues, and owned trailers being evicted from private property leads to homelessness fairly frequently.

The constant crises didn't seem weird, particularly given my line of work, it was reading back and seeing the inconsistencies that did it for me.

[DarkAnts]

It is a good thing Ruth is fake, otherwise I'm sure we'd soon be hearing that she was nervous that she came into contact with a plague-infected squirrel while living in her car. Of course she would, in fact, come down with plague and then have a miraculous recovery. Or if she felt her fakery was soon to be discovered, she'd die from plague and we'd get an update (and requests for funds for the funeral) from a sock -- not sure who, because she has no friends.

NM has plague carrying rats. We have to be careful this time of year when camping.

[Dysfundamental]

That's funny that so many people found the trailer story suspicious. It's one of the parts I found most believable. I work in an area of social services that often involves people having housing issues, and owned trailers being evicted from private property leads to homelessness fairly frequently.

The constant crises didn't seem weird, particularly given my line of work, it was reading back and seeing the inconsistencies that did it for me.

I know someone who was living in a trailer on a relative's property and, when that relative died, became homeless because she didn't have the several thousands of dollars it would cost to have the trailer moved to a trailer park and to pay the deposits/fees the trailer park required.

And I know two people who have had ovarian torsion.

And I know someone who was offered a job by a fan of their blog (in an insurance office, not a university library, but still) so I thought it possible that that was what had happened with the Chicago job and "Ruth" didn't want to say that because it would have been so unprofessional of the supervisor. (I also once offered a freelance writing/editing contract to someone on the basis of her blog, which didn't pan out in the event.)

The other stuff I had glossed over because I know so little about the fundie world, and I assumed if Vyckie thought "Ruth" was legit then it must be so.

But Jeez, was I gullible! I really honor the perspicacity of everyone who figured this out long before I woke up and smelled the coffee. Of course any one of these things could happen to somebody, but that they all would happen to one person? What was I thinking?

[Burris]

She may have gotten the idea of a lesbian couple adopting from FJ itself. She was playing to her audience.

http://freejinger.org/forums/viewtopic. ... 59#p221659

When Ruth was first outed, I assumed that she had likely started this scam with at least some form of the truth; that the lure of easy money (and sympathy) was simply too much and she dramatized her story to bring in more donations.

In reading the Truth About Ruth blog, it becomes clear to me Ruth’s life really is a mess. I can bring myself to sympathize with a situation where things can go wrong, quickly; where poor choices can turn into worse things even before the chooser actually realizes the full extent of what has happened. (She lost custody of her children, and may even have lost a pregnancy. She brought the former on herself, obviously, but…well…shit happens.)

I thought the TAR author was overstating her case a little when she claimed Ruth was likely laughing at the people she had scammed.

When I see something like this, however, where Ruth obviously took a plot twist directly from the writing of another poster…that’s calculating and cynical. It’s the work of someone who, rather than having simply fallen for the easy money, likely started out with the intent to rip off as many people as she could. That's not merely a major error in judgment; it’s malignant.

[RachelB]

That's what I am saying...I would have no idea, based on just a blog, if her drama is real or not real. I have friends in real life who have REAL drama, not manufactured. (One had a friend die and now is raising her teenaged daughter. Another had her son hit by a drunk driver and get a severe brain injury. Neither one has blogs, though. Or tip cups. They just do it.) I don't blame anyone who believed RR's stories because life happens. People can break their leg, then break their leg again. Then lose their job for breaking their leg. (I had to resign my job for getting cancer. Thankfully, I can afford to, but what about people who can't?) Poor people, in general, are a very vulnerable population. Their cars break down more. They lack health insurance, so they get sick more. I have read huge parts of RR's blog since this happened and, in all honesty, the only parts I really found suspect were the adoption to a lesbian couple and the behavior of her employer when she broke her leg. And I was really confused about the whole buying a trailer and then getting evicted thing. (If she owned the trailer, why didn't she just move it if the landowner got upset?) And I am looking at it in hindsight.

And Louisa03, I am sorry your family are being assholes. No one needs to get kicked when they are down.

When you have very little money, everything hits you harder. Misfortune and mistakes that people with means can bounce back from can sink you.

My sister-in-law's dad, who has MS and hasn't consistently been able to work, was an orchard manager for several years. Not much pay, but there was essentially a converted shed for him to live in as part of his compensation. When the orchard owner retired and decided he no longer needed a manager, he evicted SIL's dad. (SIL's brother is bipolar and has never made enough money to consistently afford access to good mental health care. And nobody has known where or how their mom is for years. But that's another story.)

SIL's dad had never really made enough to have savings on hand. He's living with my brother and SIL, because they were able to take him in. I don't think one's access to food and water, a safe place to sleep/pee/shower, and needed medical attention ought to depend on the sheer luck of having family members who are doing all right.

So, yeah-- much of Ruth's story sounded plausible to me, prior to seeing the documentation that various FJers found.

[Morton Fan]

When Ruth was first outed, I assumed that she had likely started this scam with at least some form of the truth; that the lure of easy money (and sympathy) was simply too much and she dramatized her story to bring in more donations.

In reading the Truth About Ruth blog, it becomes clear to me Ruth’s life really is a mess. I can bring myself to sympathize with a situation where things can go wrong, quickly; where poor choices can turn into worse things even before the chooser actually realizes the full extent of what has happened. (She lost custody of her children, and may even have lost a pregnancy. She brought the former on herself, obviously, but…well…shit happens.)

I thought the TAR author was overstating her case a little when she claimed Ruth was likely laughing at the people she had scammed.

When I see something like this, however, where Ruth obviously took a plot twist directly from the writing of another poster…that’s calculating and cynical. It’s the work of someone who, rather than having simply fallen for the easy money, likely started out with the intent to rip off as many people as she could. That's not merely a major error in judgment; it’s malignant.

Yes, and there were other ironic little "tells" too, like when she listed her birthday as being on April 1. She also went overboard with her comments about how people on FJ were "like family" et cetera, which makes me think she was probably snickering at some of the leg-humping. Who knows. I never believed Ruth, so I never picked up the 'sweet' vibe; I always felt she came across as snippy ... not Emily snippy, but snippy.

[Burris]

Yes, and there were other ironic little "tells" too, like when she listed her birthday as being on April 1. She also went overboard with her comments about how people on FJ were "like family" et cetera, which makes me think she was probably snickering at some of the leg-humping. Who knows. I never believed Ruth, so I never picked up the 'sweet' vibe; I always felt she came across as snippy ... not Emily snippy, but snippy.

It sucked that Ruth’s life had been so bad, I thought, but she started her story at a point after she had escaped fundamentalism and was already getting an education. She lived alone and she already had access to community funds – certainly enough to live on - so I never donated or even gave her blog more than a fast read. (I didn’t see that her birthday was listed as April 1, for example, although I doubt I would have thought much of it either way.)

The information about her sister having adopted a child to lesbians came out here at FJ, however, so it was hard to miss. My first thought was that the woman must have been incredibly pissed off at her family and was sending them a big “fuck you.†I ended up calling bullshit in the thread because I just couldn’t see someone – even if she were angry enough to contemplate it – giving her own baby to people she had been taught her entire life were predatory child abusers.

[Morton Fan]

It sucked that Ruth’s life had been so bad, I thought, but she started her story at a point after she had escaped fundamentalism and was already getting an education. She lived alone and she already had access to community funds – certainly enough to live on - so I never donated or even gave her blog more than a fast read. (I didn’t see that her birthday was listed as April 1, for example, although I doubt I would have thought much of it either way.)

The information about her sister having adopted a child to lesbians came out here at FJ, however, so it was hard to miss. My first thought was that the woman must have been incredibly pissed off at her family and was sending them a big “fuck you.†I ended up calling bullshit in the thread because I just couldn’t see someone – even if she were angry enough to contemplate it – giving her own baby to people she had been taught her entire life were predatory child abusers.

By the way, just to clarify, I did NOT mean that the "tells" meant others were foolish to have believed Ruth. I just meant that there were some tells after the fact that make me believe she was having a little devious fun with her audience. I am a super-cynic by nature (to a fault), and I can totally see why others would take her story at face value.

ETA: typo

[Morton Fan]

It sucked that Ruth’s life had been so bad, I thought, but she started her story at a point after she had escaped fundamentalism and was already getting an education. She lived alone and she already had access to community funds – certainly enough to live on - so I never donated or even gave her blog more than a fast read. (I didn’t see that her birthday was listed as April 1, for example, although I doubt I would have thought much of it either way.)

The information about her sister having adopted a child to lesbians came out here at FJ, however, so it was hard to miss. My first thought was that the woman must have been incredibly pissed off at her family and was sending them a big “fuck you.†I ended up calling bullshit in the thread because I just couldn’t see someone – even if she were angry enough to contemplate it – giving her own baby to people she had been taught her entire life were predatory child abusers.

It's interesting how that particular story was such a watershed moment for so many in regards to believing Ruth. It seems like she really over-played her hand there.

[Burris]

It's interesting how that particular story was such a watershed moment for so many in regards to believing Ruth. It seems like she really over-played her hand there.

Even then I didn’t think Ruth’s story was wholly fictional. I thought at this point that she was embellishing, probably for money, but it didn’t occur to me the entire thing had been one person’s demented side project. The ticker on the TAR blog suggests “Ruth†scammed around $5700 at last count – a nice bit of money, but likely less than she could have earned by putting the same hours into honest work. I guess I just don’t get what is the pay-off here.

[Mama Mia]

Even then I didn’t think Ruth’s story was wholly fictional. I thought at this point that she was embellishing, probably for money, but it didn’t occur to me the entire thing had been one person’s demented side project. The ticker on the TAR blog suggests “Ruth†scammed around $5700 at last count – a nice bit of money, but likely less than she could have earned by putting the same hours into honest work. I guess I just don’t get what is the pay-off here.

I think that's just a fraction of the total amount she's made. That total only includes people who have happened to stumble across this story the last couple of weeks and post an amount. I would imagine there are many, many readers who found her and donated in the past who don't have a clue this is going on. When I started googling her I found several very large sites that had discussed her at some point, including more mainstream non snark focused sites like The Nest and Gentle Christian Mothers.

[Burris]

I think that's just a fraction of the total amount she's made. That total only includes people who have happened to stumble across this story the last couple of weeks and post an amount. I would imagine there are many, many readers who found her and donated in the past who don't have a clue this is going on. When I started googling her I found several very large sites that had discussed her at some point, including more mainstream non snark focused sites like The Nest and Gentle Christian Mothers.

Oh…wow. That explains it.

ETA: Okay, so I'm doing a Google search for Possummomma and it's epic. Really. I laughed, then I laughed some more, then I sobered because, well, a lot of people were emotionally burned by this one.

[Aurora rising]

We have, too. I am ready for a break, any time now! It all started right before the youngest's 1st birthday when my husband was laid off for the 1st time. I'm hoping we're finally on to bigger and better things now. I won't hold my breath, though.

I'm sorry your friends and family are being crappy about it. :-( Thankfully, mine have been pretty good. I've only got about 3 close friends, though. lol

Same here - but thank God for loyal and wonderful friends. And yes, if I would just tell a short version nobody would believe it...

[Stephanie66]

Aurora and Louisa--you should win the lottery or something "unbelievably" good.

[marmalade]

I didn't read RR's blog religiously, and I'm a cynic who's seen (but never been a victim of) internet scams. Until "Ruth." Yep, she got me.

I even bought the lesbian bit, thinking that they were more "okay" than gay men would be to fundies; their vitriol towards homosexuals tends to be aimed mostly toward men. I didn't pry as I should have into the trailer thing, although I thought it was weird, but justified it by thinking maybe she couldn't afford lot fees or something. She also took down the tip jar for big chunks of time, which, to me, legitimized her sob stories which I now realize are the work of a sociopath playing on normal human emotions/reactions.

I haven't been around a lot of late, so I missed the "outing." but taking time to read the TAR blog today made me feel really, really stupid. :embarrassed:

[Stephanie66]

Does anyone know PM's financial information in real life? Her photo on fb shows her with a degree-is she really a reporter?

[SoybeanQueen]

Stephanie66, if you're still online, can you edit the person's name out of your post?

[Burris]

I don't think anyone should feel stupid for believing Ruth. Why wouldn't they believe her? Most people who post online aren't lying - or if they are, it's for reasons unrelated to a scam.

[Arete]

I didn't read RR's blog religiously, and I'm a cynic who's seen (but never been a victim of) internet scams. Until "Ruth." Yep, she got me.

I even bought the lesbian bit, thinking that they were more "okay" than gay men would be to fundies; their vitriol towards homosexuals tends to be aimed mostly toward men. I didn't pry as I should have into the trailer thing, although I thought it was weird, but justified it by thinking maybe she couldn't afford lot fees or something. She also took down the tip jar for big chunks of time, which, to me, legitimized her sob stories which I now realize are the work of a sociopath playing on normal human emotions/reactions.

I haven't been around a lot of late, so I missed the "outing." but taking time to read the TAR blog today made me feel really, really stupid. :embarrassed:

Don't marmalade. Don't you dare. This woman is a master, there is no shame in being taken in by a master. She has been doing this for years and she appears to always "autopsy" her outed scams to see what she did wrong and can do better in the next scam.

[Curious]

Does anyone know PM's financial information in real life? Her photo on fb shows her with a degree-is she really a reporter?

First, please do not post her real name here. It's against the ToU.

Second, there are 2 people that live in the same town that have very similar names. Just one letter different. One of them is PM/RR and one of them is the Reporter.

I believe PM/RR does have a degree through.

[lawfulevil]

I understand the impulse to blame yourself, but I hope that everyone who gave/believed understands that it is not your fault for being kind, it is purely the fault of "Ruth" for being a predator. I didn't give to "Ruth", but I did buy her crap for a long time, and I'm sure I've given money to another scam or two. Looking back RR's garbage seems obvious, but in hindsight every single idiotic thing I've ever done/dated is obvious, and it wasn't so clear from where I was standing at the time. What stands out to me now is the so-convenient tip jar. I've been through my own periods of sorrow and drama, and what I remember most is the conviction that nobody would believe or help me. I stopped talking to my closest childhood friends for years because I didn't think they could possibly understand, and I thought that if I told them they would hate and blame me, so it seemed better to just "lose touch".

I could believe all the accidents and medical problems, I've been there. I could believe the rotten family luck, I've been there too. Same with the struggles with faith, the problematic work history, and the financial issues with school. The pieces all (at least superficially) make sense, it's the whole that is clearly rotten.

[Vex]

ETA: Okay, so I'm doing a Google search for Possummomma and it's epic. Really. I laughed, then I laughed some more, then I sobered because, well, a lot of people were emotionally burned by this one.

Could I please be a total pain in the ass and ask you for some links? I've googled the PM drama but haven't really found anything beyond what was written by the folks at GDNNOP. Is her blog worth reading?

[thekate]

It's interesting how that particular story was such a watershed moment for so many in regards to believing Ruth. It seems like she really over-played her hand there.

And Kelya even said that lesbians would be too much! "Ruth" was getting cocky I think.