John and Alyssa Webster 13: The Blessed Boy Arrived

[Tdoc72]

4 hours ago, gobucks said:

Alyssa's video today talks about how Zoey and Maci started coughing over the trip to Papa Bill's and how they went straight to urgent care when they got home. Rhett ends up getting the cough as well and turns out he has RSV. I hope they didn't get the grandparents sick!

ETA They had Addallee and Jud come home with them to help with the car drive and then they stayed all week to help with the sick kids. The video ends up the 2 sibs flying home, Alyssa getting symptoms of RSV, and Ellie flying down to help for the next week! 

I hope Ellie enjoys all this. She was just in NJ at Katie’s, helping b/c Travis hurt his hands. 

[gobucks]

7 minutes ago, Tdoc72 said:

I hope Ellie enjoys all this. She was just in NJ at Katie’s, helping b/c Travis hurt his hands. 

I hope she enjoys it and doesn't get sick herself or bring RSV back to TN with her!

[GreenBeans]

13 hours ago, Tdoc72 said:

I hope Ellie enjoys all this. She was just in NJ at Katie’s, helping b/c Travis hurt his hands. 

This is unpaid child labour. I can’t believe it’s legal to have children work unpaid instead of sending them to school and giving them an education. It’s normally what you see in countries where parents have no other choice.

Or is Ellie a legal adult yet? Then it’s still exploitative. But at least they are exploiting an adult and not a child.

[JermajestyDuggar]

10 minutes ago, GreenBeans said:

This is unpaid child labour. I can’t believe it’s legal to have children work unpaid instead of sending them to school and giving them an education. It’s normally what you see in countries where parents have no other choice.

Or is Ellie a legal adult yet? Then it’s still exploitative. But at least they are exploiting an adult and not a child.

Most quiverful families would fall apart if child labor was illegal. Most of the older kids in big quiverful families work more than full time hours taking care of younger siblings, cooking, cleaning, helping tutor siblings, and yard work. 

[SassyPants]

It would be quite unusual for a 20 something adult to be seriously ill d/t RSV. A baby or elderly/compromised person might get quite sick but not an otherwise healthy adult. Why would young adult Bateses need to be dispatched to care for their married siblings’ kids? Travis was hurt, and Katie couldn’t manage 1 baby? She’d better start using BC now.

[JermajestyDuggar]

8 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

It would be quite unusual for a 20 something adult to be seriously ill d/t RSV. A baby or elderly/compromised person might get quite sick but not an otherwise healthy adult. Why would young adult Bateses need to be dispatched to care for their married siblings’ kids? Travis was hurt, and Katie couldn’t manage 1 baby? She’d better start using BC now.

Thankfully Katie and Travis aren’t against BC. 

[0 kids n not countin]

Ellie is 16.  Although one can argue it is "summer vacation" now, the younger sisters are often helping out the older sisters during the "regular school year".  While it can be nice to spend time with one's siblings and even help out, at 16, one should be enjoying the summer with one's friends.  Well maybe Ellie does, but all we see in the social media posts is her helping out her older sisters. 😶

[dawn9476]

You would think Alyssa wou;d be against it since she was exploited as a sister mom but I guess the need to have Aunt Moms because her oldest is still so young is strong. I blame Kelly. She started the vicious cycle. When the younger Bates girls starts having their own families, we will probably also start seeing niece moms with the older Bates Granddaughters. 

Edited July 23, 2023 by dawn9476

[JDuggs]

Interesting choice for the Sunday church dresses the weekend the Barbie movie came out. I think Alyssa wants to participate in a cultural trend without supporting the message of the movie. Or maybe she’s just oblivious.

Spoiler

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

16 minutes ago, JDuggs said:

Interesting choice for the Sunday church dresses the weekend the Barbie movie came out. I think Alyssa wants to participate in a cultural trend without supporting the message of the movie. Or maybe she’s just oblivious.

  Hide contents

 

I’m sure she loves the look of Barbie. And I am betting her daughters have a few Barbies. 

[rebeccawriter01]

8 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’m sure she loves the look of Barbie. And I am betting her daughters have a few Barbies. 

Many fundy families I have seen or been around don't buy Barbies or the knock offs. They have all sorts of philosophical reasons, but I think they know the dolls usually end up naked and not modest.

[JermajestyDuggar]

45 minutes ago, rebeccawriter01 said:

Many fundy families I have seen or been around don't buy Barbies or the knock offs. They have all sorts of philosophical reasons, but I think they know the dolls usually end up naked and not modest.

I could totally see that with families like the Maxwells or Duggars. But Alyssa is just so superficial. She loves clothing. She loves hair. She loves everything looking perfect and beautiful. And she has 4 girls. So I could see her buying a few Barbies. And possibly being one of those weirdos who draw bathing suits on the naked Barbies’ bodies for their modesty. 

Edited July 24, 2023 by JermajestyDuggar

[HermioneSparrow]

On 7/14/2023 at 10:00 PM, Jackie3 said:

Maybe they dont' want to. Lots of kids want nothing to do with sports.

However, they might want to play an instrument, do ceramics, build Legos, do crafts, learn chess or embroidery. I hope they have the chance to learn whatever they want, not just sports.

Well, I remember at some youtube video there was talk about Lexi liking sports and what John does and still, she's not doing any sport. And Allie is into ballet and STILL, she's not doing ballet. They don't even take their kids to the playground much. I do bet Rhett will be in softball.

[Expectopatronus]

I’m glad that she isn’t forcing little Maci to give up the soother before she’s ready! I always feel sorry for littles who are force weaned when they still need it. Mine was taking herself off until things got really bad at daycare. Then she went back hard and heavy. I’ve pulled her from daycare, put in reports through both child protective services and early learning and am letting her use soothers as needed in the car and at night. She’s eating again and is starting to be able to poop so her anxiety is dropping as is her need for the soother. Maci is coping with a change to family dynamics and likely needs the comfort. 

[Jackie3]

On 7/26/2023 at 6:55 PM, Expectopatronus said:

I’m glad that she isn’t forcing little Maci to give up the soother before she’s ready! I always feel sorry for littles who are force weaned when they still need it. Mine was taking herself off until things got really bad at daycare. Then she went back hard and heavy. I’ve pulled her from daycare, put in reports through both child protective services and early learning and am letting her use soothers as needed in the car and at night. She’s eating again and is starting to be able to poop so her anxiety is dropping as is her need for the soother. Maci is coping with a change to family dynamics and likely needs the comfort. 

It seemed like Maci WAS being pressured to give up her paci. The whole thing seemed Alyssa's idea and it baffled me why she was rushing her. Personally, I was in favor of ANYTHING that soothed my toddler. 

I did skim through the video so maybe I missed something? But Maci did not look enthused. The kid's only two, come on--she won't go to college with the thing in her mouth. (if she goes to college at all, I hope she does!)

[gobucks]

I don't know why they aren't just having her keep it in her bed. That is always the first step I was taught to weaning the paci. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

7 minutes ago, gobucks said:

I don't know why they aren't just having her keep it in her bed. That is always the first step I was taught to weaning the paci. 

That’s a good idea. Just make it a nap time and bedtime thing. My youngest hated them and never used them. My oldest liked his but when he was less than two, (maybe getting close to two) he got sick with a stuffy nose. He couldn’t suck on the pacifier and breath because his nose was stuffed. He got pissed and threw it across the room in frustration. It was pretty cute. When he did that, I decided to gather up every pacifier I could find and hide them. About a week later when he got better and wanted his pacifier again, I said I got rid of them. He was a little bothered but since he had been falling asleep without them for like 5 days, he wasn’t that upset about it. I figured if he’d had a full blown meltdown over it, I would have dug them out of the closet since I had actually kept them. But since he wasn’t too upset, I just went with it. I wish potty training, sleeping through the night, and weaning were all that easy.

[nvmbr02]

19 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

That’s a good idea. Just make it a nap time and bedtime thing. My youngest hated them and never used them. My oldest liked his but when he was less than two, (maybe getting close to two) he got sick with a stuffy nose. He couldn’t suck on the pacifier and breath because his nose was stuffed. He got pissed and threw it across the room in frustration. It was pretty cute. When he did that, I decided to gather up every pacifier I could find and hide them. About a week later when he got better and wanted his pacifier again, I said I got rid of them. He was a little bothered but since he had been falling asleep without them for like 5 days, he wasn’t that upset about it. I figured if he’d had a full blown meltdown over it, I would have dug them out of the closet since I had actually kept them. But since he wasn’t too upset, I just went with it. I wish potty training, sleeping through the night, and weaning were all that easy.

This is what we did with my oldest. Only she was a bit younger, a little over a year. She didn't seem to care when we took them. If she had fussed I would have just given them back. Neither of my other two used a pacifier much beyond 2-3 months, and even then they didn't use them much. 

[GuineaPigCourtship]

My daughter never cared much for her binkies except at daycare during naptime.  Now that she's two and a half she will get very excited if she finds a discarded one (and I mean we'd totally forgotten about them because she REFUSED them but they were in various nooks around the house where we'd stuck them).  We'll wash it and give it to her and she'll walk around with it for a bit, then leave it in another random spot.  Whatever works for her, I suppose.

[Giraffe]

20 minutes ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

My daughter never cared much for her binkies except at daycare during naptime.  Now that she's two and a half she will get very excited if she finds a discarded one (and I mean we'd totally forgotten about them because she REFUSED them but they were in various nooks around the house where we'd stuck them).  We'll wash it and give it to her and she'll walk around with it for a bit, then leave it in another random spot.  Whatever works for her, I suppose.

That sounds adorable!

[Jackie3]

13 hours ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

My daughter never cared much for her binkies except at daycare during naptime.  Now that she's two and a half she will get very excited if she finds a discarded one (and I mean we'd totally forgotten about them because she REFUSED them but they were in various nooks around the house where we'd stuck them).  We'll wash it and give it to her and she'll walk around with it for a bit, then leave it in another random spot.  Whatever works for her, I suppose.

That's like how I feel if I find a forgotten bag of cookies in the back of the cabinet. For others, perhaps an old bottle of wine.

Is there a reason that people try to wean toddlers off pacifiers? Like, a dental reason or something? Because I'd rather have a three year old with a binkie in her mouth, as opposed to a 3 year old having a tantrum. We all need to self-soothe.

If she'd waited a year or tow, Maci would have lost interest on her own, when she realized she looked like a "baby." I'm sure she wants to keep up with her big sisters.

This sounds mean, but I can't help feeling that Alyssa doesn't like how Maci looks in pictures with the binkie in her mouth. Also, she gets a lot of disapporving comments about it ("When is she going to give that up?" etc)

[Mama Mia]

1 hour ago, Jackie3 said:

That's like how I feel if I find a forgotten bag of cookies in the back of the cabinet. For others, perhaps an old bottle of wine.

Is there a reason that people try to wean toddlers off pacifiers? Like, a dental reason or something? Because I'd rather have a three year old with a binkie in her mouth, as opposed to a 3 year old having a tantrum. We all need to self-soothe.

If she'd waited a year or tow, Maci would have lost interest on her own, when she realized she looked like a "baby." I'm sure she wants to keep up with her big sisters.

This sounds mean, but I can't help feeling that Alyssa doesn't like how Maci looks in pictures with the binkie in her mouth. Also, she gets a lot of disapporving comments about it ("When is she going to give that up?" etc)

I think people get lots of pressure to have their toddlers give up binkies, and thumb sucking, and bottles because of potential tooth damage. But it really becomes one of those ridiculous things of people harassing parents about it because they think it looks bad somehow. Like the child is too “babied” or spoiled, or hasn’t learned emotional regulation (depending on the type of folks you’re around) . A long time ago when I worked in a residential treatment center for moms with substance abuse issues and their young children - many of the kids straight from foster care, mom’s there after jail -  the Dr’s would lecture the mom’s and staff to not let toddlers have pacifiers or bottles. Like, seriously?!? These kids haven’t had enough trauma, you care about a pacifier? 

[fluffernutter]

My first born was a pacifier user. And we got allllll sorts of shit about it. Right after she turned three she fell and her front two teeth became a tiny bit loose. The dentist told us to have her stop pacifier use right away. She was old enough to have a little talk with, and so we were up front with her. She didn't have any issues letting it go. I can totally see though, that if that would've been a different kid (like our middle daughter), that it could've been super awful and traumatic. I'm glad our others never got into it. It was a pain to keep track of, always have back ups, and keep clean. That said, they sure can be life-savers for the kids that use them. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I just want to say I would never shame anyone over such a thing. My little cousin had one forever. Like she would come home from kindergarten and go for her pacifier 😂 sShe eventually got rid of it. But boy did she love that thing. Thumbs are worse because you can’t throw them away. I have a childhood friend who sucked her thumb into adulthood. 

[Maggie Mae]

10 hours ago, Jackie3 said:

Is there a reason that people try to wean toddlers off pacifiers? Like, a dental reason or something?

They are discouraged for breastfeeding babies due to "nipple confusion" and awful for teeth. No one in my family of dentists has used them or at least admitted to using them. I know I never had one, my mom complains about them all the time. 

I don't really care either way, but the damage to teeth is well documented. Save money on future orthodontics or not.