Maxwell 19: Life is Still Boring

[nelliebelle1197]

9 hours ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

I'm surprised there is a Maxwell man in the kitchen even once a year. 

The Maxwell men know how to cook, and often do. Even Zscuifer used to teach her boys to cook, though I doubt anyone is being taught anything in the Little Adobe in Hell these days.

[FloraDoraDolly]

8 hours ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

What I hate about those signs (and letters, and big clock faces) is that you're giving prime wall space to some generic crap from Hobby Lobby or a Pinterest tutorial-- don't you own any art? Have you never walked around a flea market and noticed a print or painting that really speaks to your personal aesthetic? Never saved a poster from a concert or art exhibit? You don't have any friends who are into drawing or printmaking? It doesn't need to be pricey. I have loads of more interesting stuff on my walls and other than the cost of getting a few things framed, none of it cost more than $20.

In my family, we have more art than we know what to do with. My mother paints (oils mostly, but some watercolors). My sister and I both paint, although not as much as Mom does. Mom's mom left us with dozens of her own oil paintings. Dad's mom painted some still lifes. I also inherited a painting from a friend who passed away last year. Nobody knows where this painting came from, but it is stunning. In the unlikely event that anybody runs out of wall space for paintings, we also have a collection of 100-year-old photographs of our ancestors. None of this art is of museum quality, nor is it likely that any of it will be worth money someday. But it's ours. And there are people outside of the family who have said they like it.

[FloraDoraDolly]

10 hours ago, SPHASH said:

Poor Sarah wishes the blog readers Happy Resurrection Sunday.  As in the past they will have the family dinner.  Lets hope Judgy Chelsy gave her MIL some pointers.

I hope Nathan's kids were able to spend time with Melanie's side of the family today. They actually had an Easter egg hunt once. (Maybe more than once, I don't know. I hope so!)

As for the way fundie men grip their wives/fiancees, as children most of these guys probably received little or no affection from their parents. They weren't allowed to receive affection from anyone else, except maybe a sister mom (who also had a large brood to raise). Thus, the "grip" could be the way these guys hide their clinginess.

[CyborgKin]

this seems appropriate.

[OhNoNike]

“These adorable little guys are just waiting for a home. Yes, these are Anna’s creations lately.”

Gahhh.  Why can’t you just say, “Some of Anna’s recent creations”???

We all know they’re Anna’s. No one else does shit in this family like that.  No one would have seen the picture and asked, “Oh!  Are those made by Anna?”  

 

[nomoxian]

On the new blog post, I noticed the 'girls' are in the basement at the kids table. The only non-married adult allowed upstairs just happens to have a penis.

[anjulibai]

1 hour ago, nomoxian said:

On the new blog post, I noticed the 'girls' are in the basement at the kids table. The only non-married adult allowed upstairs just happens to have a penis.

Looks like Sarah was allowed. One benefit of eldest spinster status? 

I think they could have fit the kids upstairs, though. Pretty shitty to make Anna and Mary watch them downstairs. 

[OhNoNike]

“I bet the kids were excited to get Anna’s creations in their Easter baskets!  God bless your beautiful family.  He is risen!”

[Pretzel]

1 minute ago, OhNoNike said:

“I bet the kids were excited to get Anna’s creations in their Easter baskets!  God bless your beautiful family.  He is risen!”

FJ Translation: You have nothing better to fill those easter baskets with than some lame balloon animals. Oh, and Jesus. 

[nelliebelle1197]

Uh, when did they get friends?!

[Eternalbluepearl]

Someday the Maxwell thread will say HOT! And it will be because Sarah has left Daddy's house to live her own life. And I can't wait. The Maxwells are so boring and yet I keep coming back just to check. They really know how to hook readers. 

[formergothardite]

1 hour ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Uh, when did they get friends?!

Sarah had a friend visit and she was wearing PANTS!!!! 

[catlady]

1 hour ago, anjulibai said:

 

I think they could have fit the kids upstairs, though. Pretty shitty to make Anna and Mary watch them downstairs. 

I thought this at first too; and what a hassle to carry tableware and food down a flight of stairs followed by hauling it all back up again. But maybe they forgot to update the schedule with adjusting  the main table to make room for the others. 

Then I got to thinking, maybe M&A *wanted* to get the hell away from everyone else and just do their own thing with the kids. Either way, I hope it was their choice to be in the basement. 

[ophelia]

1 hour ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Uh, when did they get friends?!

Where do these friends suddenly come from? They may have brothers or cousins they could introduce to the girls, since getting married might be the only way to get out of MaxHell.

[bertnee]

I remember being excited about watching little kids at family events... When I was 13... Which is about the age Mary and Anna seem.

I had a dream last night that we got a giant touchscreen TV/computer. I used it to compose fake comments to the Maxwells. [emoji23]

[MamaJunebug]

@Pretzel I enjoyed your comment but Jesus is the point of the Resurrection Sunday festivities....er, Family Gatherings - not festive! Never festive! - so there’s that. 

I agree that M&A probably enjoy time with the cousins just because that’s when they are “the grownups” and have people looking up to them, instead of ordering around. 

Alrhough previous reports of Joshua ordering PSarah around and not even using the “Aunt” honorific are terrifying in what they portend, and how the boy cousins are already little Stevii. It was a couple years ago, IIRC. 

But what I really came here to say was, Fixer Upper snark! Can I pile on????

Chip has NO redeeming value to me, so let’s focus on Joanna. I haven’t watched in several seasons, but when I did, the way she robotically presented the redo’s on the laptop to the clients just annoyed the heck out of me. There was no salesmanship, no acknowledgment that this was the clients’ money and future home she was presenting. With a comical German or Russian accent she would go well in a Mel Brooks movie: Just “zis is vat ve vill do to your HOUSE! Und you vill LIKE it!” And to a couple, the clients  look shades of terrified: nod and smile, nod and smile!

And the reveals not only looked alike but toward the latter eps (that I saw) it felt like walking into a furniture store. Especially when the dining area was closest to the front door. My MST3K-wannabe self would say aloud, “Folks, you’ll find our living room pieces toward the back, there, and all the rusted wall art is 10% off today!” 

But my favorite snark was noticing how — after the first few episodes — when they showed a brief minute of the family entertaining in the home, all the shots were of the oversized island and in the kitchen. In the very very early one or two, they showed the living room and whoa, did it look different with the family’s own sofa, etc., instead of the pieces the interior designers had staged for the reveal! The room itself had lost most of its appeal. 

Now, Home Town I like. The show is transparent that an architect actually does the planning and I do get the impression that Ben is on the job site working, not just acting. In that case, it’s Erin for whom I’m constantly on the bubble: “Talk rudely to Ben once more and I will visit Laurel to school you, brat! You’ll NEED Ben to pick me up by my collar and belt and move me away from you!” What I’m saying is, be good to the guy who’s good to you.

[Pretzel]

@MamaJunebug I know. My point was rather that the content of that comment is so weird. There's some really trivial stuff mentioned in the comment, and then the 'He is risen'. Nothing else. Like, wouldn't you as a devoted Maxwell fan/follower Christian (especially on Resurrection Sunday!) make Jesus the point of your comment to a fundie Christian family like the Maxwells? I dunno. I just found that comment hilarious. Like, the commenter really wanted to suck up to the Maxwells but had to make sure Jesus was mentioned, too, but didn't bother mentioning his name or add some Happy Resurrection Sunday wishes or something. I guess when you're on one wavelength with the Maxwells, personal pronouns will do. lol

[Captain Obvious]

5 hours ago, anjulibai said:

Looks like Sarah was allowed. One benefit of eldest spinster status? 

I think they could have fit the kids upstairs, though. Pretty shitty to make Anna and Mary watch them downstairs. 

Although - and I'm such a dork for remembering this - their house has a walk-in basement so maybe there are no stairs? 

Regardless, it's probably still cold and not comfortable to eat in. 

[Ivycoveredtower]

add me to the list of people that find the kids and Auntie's stuck in the basement as very shitty. 

[kpmom]

29 minutes ago, Captain Obvious said:

Although - and I'm such a dork for remembering this - their house has a walk-in basement so maybe there are no stairs? 

 

When I read the poster's comment about walking downstairs with the food, I remembered about the walk-in basement too.

Then realized I know way too much about the Maxwells!  So, I'll join you in the dork closet (right next to the prayer closet, I think).

And I was thinking, can you really even say the whole family had dinner together when half of them were in an entirely different room?  Lots of families do children's tables for big dinners, but generally the tables are within earshot of each other.

[Triplet3]

Re the Maxwell 'friends', the girl next to Anna is John-Marie's sister, I think. Are any of the others those sisters who Sarah flew out to see sometime last year? The ones who have a headband business?

[SPHASH]

Looks like Amish Anna's mom came to visit

[nomoxian]

All of those shiny toothy smiles creep me out.

[nastyhobbitses]

Real talk I want Chelsy's rug.

Also, is Sarah friends with a...PANTS-WEARING WOMAN?!? Be careful, Sarah, or her separated legs, so much faster than your skirt-clad ones, will swiftly carry you straight to the lake of fire! 

Also, I'm glad that the kids know kids their age who don't seem to be related to them. It's the little things. 

[Jana814]

49 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Looks like Amish Anna's mom came to visit

I think your are right. Glad she was able to see her grandchildren.