Mortons: A new year of Marryin', Birthin', and Writin'

[LurkerOverThePond]

3 hours ago, SolomonFundy said:

Between all those trains going into tunnels and mountains, and the good feelin' he gets from "cleaning his gun", I'm gonna go ahead and say that this is the thirstiest piece of fundy manhood we've seen in a minute.

Good to see I'm not the only one with a dirty mind

I can't wait to read Addie's courtship story sometime in the future, if she decides to write one. It will probably involve a lot of billowing long curtains in the evening breeze, lovely walks in Georgia countryside, soft light of setting sun rays, a fine  young man who needs to talk to a wise old father of a certain young woman, and God knows what else...

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 hours ago, LurkerOverThePond said:

Good to see I'm not the only one with a dirty mind

I can't wait to read Addie's courtship story sometime in the future, if she decides to write one. It will probably involve a lot of billowing long curtains in the evening breeze, lovely walks in Georgia countryside, soft light of setting sun rays, a fine  young man who needs to talk to a wise old father of a certain young woman, and God knows what else...

You all can give me the summary because I just can’t stand Addie’s writing. 

[VVV]

59 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

You all can give me the summary because I just can’t stand Addie’s writing. 

Same here.

I keep thinking that there must be an honest human somewhere under all that flowery prose but maybe there really is no "there" there.

[picklepizzas]

Boooooo. He constantly posts his little takes on scripture on Facebook, which get all of two likes every time (guess all his fb friends have hit ignore by this point). They include a lot of ALL CAPS STATEMENTS. So he’s preachy AND dumb (yes, I think not being able to spell your own job title is a HUGE red flag re: intelligence). Poor addie, I wanted better for her. 

I guess on the bright side it seems like he mostly chose inspirational bible quotes about god having your back rather than judgey ones. So that’s nice.  (Low bar, lolz). 

[SolomonFundy]

Just to throw fuel on the "potentially pregnant Mortons" fire, Martha made a post on Instagram today of Zandry with a pillow up her shirt and a hand on her back, mimicking pregnancy lower back pain. Martha added eleventy emojis, and said that this was because Zandry had been watching her "awesome aunties". 

Zandry is 3 1/2 (will turn 4 in September). It's entirely possible that she remembers the recent pregnancies of two of her close-by aunts (Alyssa and Kennedy live on the compound, and both have had babies in the past year), but it seems more like something a child her age would do in the immediate aftermath of seeing someone exhibit that behavior. 

 

[NachosFlandersStyle]

Are the older Mortons moving down to Paraguay again? Kress posted pics of them and also made a post about unpacking at "mom's new house."

[JermajestyDuggar]

5 hours ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

Are the older Mortons moving down to Paraguay again? Kress posted pics of them and also made a post about unpacking at "mom's new house."

That confused me too. But then I wandered if she was talking about “honorary family members.” Because it’s obvious she has become very close with some folks down there. 

[NachosFlandersStyle]

36 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

That confused me too. But then I wandered if she was talking about “honorary family members.” Because it’s obvious she has become very close with some folks down there. 

I didn't even think of that. It's also possible that Rachel is moving to a new place and she means the kids are helping unpack their mom's house.

Edited May 4, 2019 by NachosFlandersStyle

[fundiefan]

13 hours ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

I didn't even think of that. It's also possible that Rachel is moving to a new place and she means the kids are helping unpack their mom's house.

I read it too and at first thought the elder Mortons were moving, but that didn't jive with her other posts about them flying "a long way to help". 

I don't think more Mortons are moving down there, not just yet anyway. I think, like someone else said, she's using the word mom to refer to some of her "adopted" family. Rachel & Wes are building - she's posted pics of the land and made reference to making a permanent home. 

But, ultimately, this is Morton-world we're talking about an really, it could mean any damn thing except the seemingly obvious. 

[caitrona]

On 5/4/2019 at 11:09 AM, NachosFlandersStyle said:

Are the older Mortons moving down to Paraguay again? Kress posted pics of them and also made a post about unpacking at "mom's new house."

They're definitely down there right now, she posted a picture with them & their pastor's family.  Adeline's beau seems to be coming back to the States right now.

[VBOY9977]

Of course they’re the type of people that celebrate cinco de mayo ???

https://www.instagram.com/p/BxGnpF7F2zL/?utm_source=ig_share_sheet&igshid=17c14l85vw4m

 

[NachosFlandersStyle]

I thought that Cinco de Mayo was basically an eating and drinking holiday? I went to a street festival yesterday and that's entirely what it was. Which is fine! Mexican food is always good, drinking a $12 pina colada out of an actual pineapple is fun for some... I'm always down for an excuse to eat and drink. But they don't drink, and Campbell mentioned Taco Bell (?!) so literally all they're doing is cosplaying as Mexican people. What the fuck you guys.

[JermajestyDuggar]

I saw those pictures and thought it tacky as fuck. They think they are so funny and clever but they are just tacky assholes. 

Did you guys see the picture where the men only had one button at the top buttoned? Yeah they are making fun of Mexicans. 

[nelliebelle1197]

52 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I saw those pictures and thought it tacky as fuck. They think they are so funny and clever but they are just tacky assholes. 

Did you guys see the picture where the men only had one button at the top buttoned? Yeah they are making fun of Mexicans. 

They are all little self-righteous entitled jerks. From Morton to Bates to Campana to Thomases to Rodriguii to Maxwell to Anderson, no matter the fundie flavor, generation one is self-righteous and cleanly pass that to generation two, which is incredibly entitled on top of it all.

[fundiefan]

11 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I saw those pictures and thought it tacky as fuck. They think they are so funny and clever but they are just tacky assholes. 

Did you guys see the picture where the men only had one button at the top buttoned? Yeah they are making fun of Mexicans. 

Cinco de Mayo is more of an American "holiday" than a Mexican one. I'd also be willing to bet not one person at that party actually knows anything about it all or its origination or that most in Mexico really don't give a rat's ass.

They use it as an excuse to play dress up (the Mortons seem as fond of dressing up as DPIAT) and show their racism. 

Personally, I've "celebrated" Cinco de Mayo - but by going to Mexican restaurants. I love, love, love Mexican food and go whenever I can. I fully admit to taking advantage of the American "holiday" and getting 2 for 1 Margaritas. I don't dress up though, and I don't wish those at the restaurant Happy Cinco de Mayo and I don't dress up in racist garb. 

[JMO]

Alyssa posted about the girls getting into the coffee grinds and dumping it on the floor. But it was all. "YAY! I love my life.  Coffee grinds. ?". I dont buy that for one second. If she's laughing it's out of exhaustion and being so at the end of her row that she laughs rather than cries. 

[ophelia]

5 hours ago, JMO said:

Alyssa posted about the girls getting into the coffee grinds and dumping it on the floor. But it was all. "YAY! I love my life.  Coffee grinds. ?". I dont buy that for one second. If she's laughing it's out of exhaustion and being so at the end of her row that she laughs rather than cries. 

I thought the same. And in a year from now, she probably has a fourth child. I just can't wrap my head around that. Addie, although being in Paraguay a lot, probably was a huge support to Alyssa and her girls, but now that Addie is going to get married and will most likely move from the compound, Alyssa will loose that help. Katie's oldest is turning 10 this year, so in their world she is probably considered to be mature enough to take care of little ones, cooking, laundry. But then again Katie is a single mom so she might need her oldest girls at home to support her. 

[lilith]

2 hours ago, ophelia said:

I thought the same. And in a year from now, she probably has a fourth child. I just can't wrap my head around that. Addie, although being in Paraguay a lot, probably was a huge support to Alyssa and her girls, but now that Addie is going to get married and will most likely move from the compound, Alyssa will loose that help. Katie's oldest is turning 10 this year, so in their world she is probably considered to be mature enough to take care of little ones, cooking, laundry. But then again Katie is a single mom so she might need her oldest girls at home to support her. 

I think it’s possible Addie’s suitor will move onto the compound. He’s a local and it doesn’t seem that he has much money so he probably doesn’t own his own home. I think Addie and her parents would both be happy if they settled into the newlywed apartment.

[JermajestyDuggar]

There were so many times when my kids were little and I would laugh so I didn’t cry. There was a huge diaper cream debacle that I just had to take a picture of and laugh about. It’s so hard to cleanup diaper cream! 

Oh and then there was the time my son shat on the floor and I accidentally stepped in it. I screamed so loud out of surprise and my kids just laughed and laughed.

I promise you all that my children are not Nauglers! They are just a bit naughty on occasion. 

[JMO]

Martha posted that she has been struggling with infertility and amenorrhea for the past year and a half. But Jesus saved her and led her to take some new unproven supplement and she just got her period again. I do understand and feel her pain (having gone through it myself) but everyone chiming in about her testimony gives me the eye rolls. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

23 minutes ago, JMO said:

Martha posted that she has been struggling with infertility and amenorrhea for the past year and a half. But Jesus saved her and led her to take some new unproven supplement and she just got her period again. I do understand and feel her pain (having gone through it myself) but everyone chiming in about her testimony gives me the eye rolls. 

Kori Wissmann did the same thing. I believe she says Plexus stuff helped her get pregnant with her only child. I’ve dealt with infertility and it sucks. There is lots of woo out there for infertility. It’s easy to prey on the desperate and vulnerable. 

[DangerNoodle]

What's with fundies and Plexus? It seems like all roads lead back there. Any thread goes on long enough  will eventually have either the family being talked about, or someone in their orbit, as a "Plexus Ambassador."

 

I look at their website and it just looks normal. The Plexus products, which you can buy on Amazon and eBay, all have modest ratings but they're insanely expensive. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Campbell and John went to a Trump rally and posted pics/video on Instagram stories. 

Because fundies are predictable. I wish they would think for themselves just once in their lives. 

[SolomonFundy]

38 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Campbell and John went to a Trump rally and posted pics/video on Instagram stories. 

Because fundies are predictable. I wish they would think for themselves just once in their lives. 

Oh, they totally think for themselves! They just happen to have the exact same thoughts as every single other member of their extended family. It's just an AMAZING coincidence that all of these totally free thinkers think the same thoughts at the same time! It helps cut down on the planning time when they carpool to the Trump rally. 

[ophelia]

Looks like Clive, Lise and the kids were also there. And one of the remaining unmarried Morton sons. Edwin? Paul? I can't tell them apart.