Lori Alexander 28: Not Liking Children

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Do LoriKen and their children/DILs/SILs who live near all go to the same church?

If LoriKen left in a huff/ were asked to leave, do you all think they would demand the family leave too?

Can you imagine the embarrassment the kids would feel knowing that the church kicked LoriKen out, or worse tried to put them under authority?.  Because you just know that whatever happens, the info will spread through the congregation. 

One can but hope that Lori's latest posts and nastiness to readers, as well as the 'women not in God's image' post will finally make the kids see how utterly vile LoriKen really are.  I've always suspected Stephen lives across the country because he does know and wants to be as far away from them as possible

 

[jerkit]

Alyssa attends a PCA church called Redemption

[TeddyBonkers]

After reading the "about us" blurbs on North Coast Calvary Chapel, it's no wonder Ken and Lori stopped attending there! Some highlights:

~"We believe that all people are sinners and yet made in the image of God." even the wimminz??? HERETICS!

~"We believe that all Christians are called to minister God's mercy to the lost, the sick, and the poor." I don't think that means blogging, Lori.

~"In our relationships with each other we value non-controlling relationships, Christian unity, and servant leadership."

 

[older than allosaurs]

Oh this is creepy.

Matt Tague, formerly a Family Pastor" at North Coast Calvary, pleaded not guilty in June to multiple counts of child molestation. He's a married father of six, three by adoption, and evidently his wife caught him with a 13-year-old relative. The church fired him. Its Facebook page was full of "who are we to judge" comments from members, such as: Janet Merrihew--I pray that the gossip stops, and the family, church and especially Matt can have peace.

Before his arrest, Tague was all over the place blogging about adoption and Christian family life and consulting on how to grow churches. That's been scrubbed.

 

 

 

[molecule]

1 hour ago, sawasdee said:

I'm not part of the christian blogging world. Can members who are post as often and as completely as they can of the unchristian nature of "The Transformed Wife" and "Always Learning"?*

This can be a tricky thing. Most Christian bloggers have a ministry from their own, and denouncing another person's blog isn't usually why they're doing what they do (unless they're Lori, who lives to bring others down). Plus, they don't want to send any more traffic to the bad blogger by writing about them. Writing a blog post about Lori would give Lori more attention, and it would bring Lori's attention to the person writing about them. Given the way she disparages so many other respected writers and speakers, I can't imagine why anyone would want to put themselves in that position.

Here's what I've seen happen on several different blogs. I've seen several blog posts where one of Lori's ideas is being denounced, albeit without her name being included. Anyone who is familiar with Lori will know exactly who is being discussed. I know of one major blogger who stated on her personal FB page that she has banned Lori from commenting because Lori is combative and dangerous.

Because I do marriage ministry, I know quite a few Christian marriage bloggers. Several have told me that they have responded to email inquires about Lori and Lori's ideas to say that she is unchristian and that she shouldn't be followed. It isn't something that is likely to happen publicly, but I do know that she is denounced behind-the-scenes quite a bit.

[onemama]

2 hours ago, feministxtian said:

If they're not members of the church then the pastor has no real authority over them anyway...that's only for MEMBERS who have agreed to place themselves under that particular pastoral authority. The ones who come under the heading of "attenders", the church has no spiritual authority over them.

I don't know if they are members or not, but Ken has this to say about the authority of elders of the church:

Quote

Imagine what churches might look like if no authority was established for the church. Any faction could challenge its direction, doctrine and daily operations on a regular basis creating chaos in the church. Thus the final authority of the elders is to ask those who are contentious to leave the church.

I guess they could be labelled "contentious" as they were asked not to teach their brand of submission and they've kept spreading it on their blog.  I don't think solid churches want to be associated with fringe ideologies like Lori and Ken's.

By the way, Trey is back and has posted on the newest blog post. Twelve delightful paragraphs of reminding women of "their place".  I wish I had the time and the inclination to rewrite it and turn it right back at him.  

[feministxtian]

I read Trey's screed....

The bullshit about "suffering under a cruel and unjust husband". Really? Look...if he's gonna be an asshole, me smiling at him isn't going to do a damn thing to change that. I also don't think I'd be likely to put up with his bullshit and I'd tell him so (I damn sure did). Men like Trey are really nothing more than pencil-dicked bullies. And, if you think about it, so is Lori. 

[Florita]

Scouring the interwebz for words to use against her and found this oldie from 2013:

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2013/03/our-churchs-mentoring-program.html

Lori brags:

Quote

 

The leaders have agreed to give me more than one woman since my passion is teaching the younger women to love their husband, love their children, etc.  This time I have three women.  I have mentored many women through this program and love it!

I have decided this is the only ministry I want to put my time into.  There is such a huge need for older women to be mentoring younger women.  It seems the majority of women are floundering in their marriages, in the process of getting divorced, or divorced.

Not one of the women I have mentored in the past ten years has gotten a divorce.

 

North Coast Calvary still has the program: http://northcoastcalvary.org/ministries/connect-learn-grow/women/tandem-mentoring/

Do you suppose she was uninvited to mentor and that is the real reason they changed churches?

[EowynW]

I think you can more effectively mentor people by working beside them in other more profitable ministries JMHO 

[jerkit]

Can you imagine being paired with Lori in that program?  I bet there are other mentors in the program that are sweet, kind older women who want to talk about Jesus and drink coffee with a younger woman. I would guess they form lovely friendships. And the younger woman who gets paired with Lori is like "GET ME OUTTA HEEEEEEERE"

[Hisey]

1 hour ago, jerkit said:

Alyssa attends a PCA church called Redemption

I think Alyssa lives about an hour away, so might not attend the same church. But Ryan and family live close by. I'll bet Lori and Ken switched to their church

[crawfishgirl]

Remember that Lori once said (in a comment on her blog, maybe six months ago?) that she was told not to discuss submission on church grounds.  Can you imagine her in a mentoring program yet unable to mention submission?  That would eat her alive.  I wonder if she changed churches after that.

[SuperNova]

Lori writes:

If I mention the word submission, being kind, loving, or serving our husbands in any way, women scream “abuse” or selfishness on the husband’s part. 

My guess is that although I tick almost every box on Lori's list, she still wouldn't approve because I'm an atheist.

This got me thinking, is it more important to truly believe in god and do his works with a hard heart or is it better to believe in nothing and genuinely be good with no thought of heaven? I have a hard time believing that a perfect omnipotent being would fail to see us for who were are and our true intentions.

[onemama]

10 hours ago, jerkit said:

Can you imagine being paired with Lori in that program?  I bet there are other mentors in the program that are sweet, kind older women who want to talk about Jesus and drink coffee with a younger woman. I would guess they form lovely friendships. And the younger woman who gets paired with Lori is like "GET ME OUTTA HEEEEEEERE"

NEVER in a million years.  Although, if I could fake needing a mentor and get her assigned to me, I bet you I might be able to drive her to insanity 

10 hours ago, Florita said:

Do you suppose she was uninvited to mentor and that is the real reason they changed churches?

Very possibly. I can imagine her mentees started complaining that she blamed them for everything that was wrong in their lives, telling them to submit more. I can even imagine a husband or two complaining that this mentorship program was not helping but making things worse as their wives were becoming anxious and depressed. 

10 hours ago, EowynW said:

I think you can more effectively mentor people by working beside them in other more profitable ministries JMHO 

Absolutely!   A mentor puts time and effort into the lives of his/her mentees. The whole point is helping them to become more autonomous in some way or another. Lori creates dependency on her insane "teachings". Those women aren't learning to seek the Scriptures for truth, or how to find the strength to face whatever it is they have to face in life. Instead, they are being told that she is the only source of truth in a sea of false teachers, and that her way is the only way.  

[onemama]

Anon M is a fast learner. Look at this:

Quote

I gave one girl a copy of created and she said it gave her nightmares. Im still baffled as to how thats even possible.

And this:

Quote

As for Hazel. She was foolish if she believed she had to stay under the same roof as a physicly abusive mate. And depending on then severity, that would cover extreeme verbal abuse as well. She should of continued to do the love dare , or at least smiled, learned how to respectfully defend herself thru biblical counselling and live under a seperate roof for a time, with the intention of moving back in once things improved and under approval by her counsellor. It may of also been appropriate to look into mental illness/addictions on her husbands part.

What? She was foolish? Do you know what it's like to live with a person who makes you think you are the problem?  Don't you know that counselling costs money and not everyone who needs it has the spare cash to afford it?  You are so ignorant, so heartless and so foolish! How dare you?

As for the last bit, this really troubles me. It's not the first time I read that the wife, the subordinate, the supposed weaker vessel, should see to her husband's mental health or get him into a program for addicts, or whatever.  He's a full-grown adult. He's angry at her. How is she supposed to get him to go see a doctor to inquire after his mental health?  How do you think he'd react if she suggested he might need help?  

AnonM, go back to school and learn to spell, for crying out loud! 

Lori's reply

Quote

Thanks, but I am not even sure Hazel was being truthful since I have heard this type of argument against obeying truth over and over again. It seems to me to be a distraction to move women away from the beautiful message of God’s Word. Many women today hate the word submission and will do all they can to subvert it.

 

[Curious]

8 hours ago, SuperNova said:

This got me thinking, is it more important to truly believe in god and do his works with a hard heart or is it better to believe in nothing and genuinely be good with no thought of heaven? I have a hard time believing that a perfect omnipotent being would fail to see us for who were are and our true intentions.

The problem with people like Lori and most of the people we follow is that they think that unless you have rules to follow based on an ancient tome, you CAN'T possibly do the right thing.

That is because, IMO, they have problems being good people.  Lori says she's a Christian, but she is the least Christlike person we follow.  Not because she wants to basically subjugate women, but because she is innately an awful person.  I have no doubt that if Lori was an Atheist she would be very militant in the opposite direction.

Some people just really suck and Lori happens to be one of those people.  I would bet if there were studies done that a certain type of person is drawn toward extremism.   Like some people have addictive personalities, some people are just controlling assholes and if it wasn't religion they would find another way to get their fix.

Lori is extreme in other facets of her life as well (ie: food).

I'm not talking about people that get dragged along for the ride or are raised in this kind of culture and are essentially brainwashed.

[KDA]

I haven't caught up on all the posts yet, but could Pastor Jay B. (of Lori's blog) possibly be the Pastor Jay B. Broadnax of Mt, Pisgah church? I haven't had a huge look into it, but the teachings there do seem to be normal, and very un-Lori-like.

[Free Jana Duggar]

24 minutes ago, KDA said:

I haven't caught up on all the posts yet, but could Pastor Jay B. (of Lori's blog) possibly be the Pastor Jay B. Broadnax of Mt, Pisgah church? I haven't had a huge look into it, but the teachings there do seem to be normal, and very un-Lori-like.

We really don't know who he is other than he is in the same area as Lori and Ken.   I really hope someone out there can figure out who he is. I would love to have his contact info. and support him.

[RosyDaisy]

Sooner or later, a woman or a child is going to die because of Lori's advice.

If that happens, I hope Lori is outed very publicly..as in major media outlets reporting it.

[Seahorse Wrangler]

27 minutes ago, RosyDaisy said:

If that happens, I hope Lori is outed very publicly..as in major media outlets reporting it.

She'll probably just dismiss it the way the Pearls do.

 

It wasn't her fault, other people didn't follow her advice properly.

[jerkit]

Lori made an entire post about some rando instagram commenter. 

 

[louisa05]

My great great grandmother didn't have a college education. When her husband died less than a year into marriage, she had no skills and lived in a tiny impoverished Appalachian town. So she turned her house into a *ahem* "boarding house" for rail workers. Let's just say according to local lore, said workers never spent an entire night or ate a meal there. 

When she turned up pregnant and gave birth(I think, I can never remember, I know it was over a year, less than a year and a half) 15 months after her husband died, she just stuck his name on the birth certificate.

So, obviously, being uneducated and unable to provide for herself kept her all good and godly. Back in those pure and sinless times when women worked at home running "boarding houses" instead of going out into the evil world to make a living or be educated. I'd love to share this story of godliness from the blessed days of old with Lori but I'm banned. 

[EowynW]

The Duggar girls never had choices. Just like I never had them. The girls seem to be marrying well off so their lack of choice maybe doesn't affect them much. But I married an average person and it hits you like a ton of bricks eventually. Plus, I just don't have the personality for such a life. Didn't as a kid and don't know. The thought of having to move back in with my parents (like Lori is suggesting) if something happens to Mr. EW makes me want to die. 

[molecule]

The comment Lori is complaining about today is on this article in The Hollywood Gossip. 

Not only is she gossiping, she's gossiping about gossip.

[louisa05]

5 minutes ago, molecule said:

The comment Lori is complaining about today is on this article in The Hollywood Gossip. 

Not only is she gossiping, she's gossiping about gossip.

Nice. Lori reads gossip pages. How holy of her. 

I liked this observation in that comment section about Duggar courtships:

Quote

"They are not allowed to date as adults without a chaperone as a means to guarantee "purity," yet what does that really say? That you are marrying someone you cannot trust to respect your boundaries unless there's a watchdog around?" 

Never thought of it, but that is exactly what they are telling these couples. What a lovely message to start a relationship with.