Joy and Austin: Attending Conferences and Getting Pregnant

[SilverBeach]

@Chewing Gum, I was addressing a physical impossibility, not the technical correctness of a calculation. But that horse is definitely dead, so I'm moving on.

I may as well address how I feel about Joy's pregnancy since I'm here. 

Another future Trump supporter in the making...ugh. It's sad to not get to explore each other's body and get to know more about sex before getting pregnant. Whether intentional or not, Jinger is better off in this regard by not having an immediate pregnancy. Outside of travel, they all have such limited lives. 

[VeganCupcake]

The fact that a 19 year old is pregnant makes me cringe. 

[SilverBeach]

Spontaneous ovulation is a thing too, as are irregular periods. And bad/inaccurate memories. Due date calculations are not an exact science. It's those 16 week (calculated) but really 13 week (actual) pregnancies that probably end up appearing to be 43 week gestations, but are not really. Mine was 17 days past the due date, so something was off, LOL. As long as mom and baby are healthy in the end, who cares?

I have neglected the JRod, (who also recently announced that she is with child for the 13th time), toxic Lori Anderson, and Poopistan threads because of this breaking news. Off to catch up, thank goodness FJ is so much more than the Duggars.

[Melissa1977]

2 hours ago, singsingsing said:

Holy shit. Pregnancy is calculated from the first day of your last period. It applies to virgins. It applies to non-virgins. It applies to any woman who is menstruating. Yes, it's kind of weird, but it makes sense given that a woman's cycle begins on the first day of her period. It's not actually all that confusing or mysterious, and it's not new. 

Well, it was as you say, but nowadays doctors advise it's better to have an ultrasound at 8 weeks, because embryo's size is a more accurate way to calculate real conception day.

Last day of your period can be confusing because not all women ovulate at the 14th day. Some ovulate at the beginning or at the end of the time between periods. Even some.women ovulate and get pregnant while actually having a period, which is weird but can happen. That's why the natural "calendar birth control" isn't reliable.

[sparrow]

If Joy conceived on her wedding night then we are near-pregnancy twins. I'm due Feb. 11. Except I'm 34, not 19. God she's young... 

But I have to admit to having total boob jealousy. Damn!

[danni9242]

8 hours ago, Emme said:

That hashtag makes me think of a Harry Potter quote.. 'wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure'-Rowena Ravenclaw.... I like my quote better than hers. 

'Wit' used to be a word referring to a penis. So question is, is the Ravenclaw motto secretly a dick joke whilst sounding clever if you don't know that?

[SuffolkNWhat]

The dating thing is used even in cases of IVF where conception is known down to the day! My sister was always 2 weeks "ahead" of when she could actually be pregnant due to this. It's just the way pregnancies are dated and will be used for pretty much all time I reckon (part of that is wanting to get to that "magical" 13 weeks for a lot of women where the risk of MC drops)

1 hour ago, Melissa1977 said:

Well, it was as you say, but nowadays doctors advise it's better to have an ultrasound at 8 weeks, because embryo's size is a more accurate way to calculate real conception day.

 

Cant speak for other countries but in the UK this is not common, our dating scan is at 12-13 weeks along with prenatal testing for chromosome markers. We don't get another scan until 20-23 weeks for a more detailed health check on the baby (usually the time couples find out the sex if they choose to)

 

obviously there are more scans available to those who medically need them but the 2 are the standard NHS scans

4 minutes ago, danni9242 said:

'Wit' used to be a word referring to a penis. So question is, is the Ravenclaw motto secretly a dick joke whilst sounding clever if you don't know that?

As a Ravenclaw this made me giggle. Rowena liked the D. 

[Shadoewolf]

I was 19 when Oldest Wolfie was born. I had already graduated HS 2 years prior and was working full time. College for me wasn't a consideration because I hated school with the fire of 1000 suns.

Being a parent that young was TOUGH, even with both our families nearby. She had jaundice and colic and Middle Wolfie came prematurely when I was just 23. But my big epiphany came a few years later, when my ex husband got deployed. I ended up being a SAHM to that point. Traditional Polish Catholic, he was raised to be 'the provider'. It worked, until it didn't. He got deployed to a forward base in Iraq, and I don't think I slept for more than 2 hours a night for a month,  I was so scared. Things got worse. Our basement level apartment flooded and got taken over with mold. We lost 3/4 of everything we owned. Then the car started to have major problems. Everything fell on me, and at that time I was raising 2 girls alone. I spent one day crying then pulled myself up. I not only could do it, I WOULD do it. I didn't need a man to take care of me, and where would we be if anything happened to him? How could I provide for our daughterd when all I had was a HS diploma and a limited retail skillset. So I went to the local tech school the following week and signed up for a year-long medical assisting course. Amazingly, medical seems to be my thing!  But anyway, when his tour got extended it was no big deal. I was fine juggling everything alone.

Until he got home, and both of us realized we had not only grown up in that 17 months away, but we'd grown really far apart. We were totally different people and really strangers who at the end of the day, didn't mesh well together anymore. I was who 'I' wanted to be.

Now mind you, being young had 1 perk. I guess I'm the 'cool' mom for the most part. I was a teen with Korn and Marilyn Manson and I had turquoise hair senior year long before it was popular. My kids are dressed respectfully but if Oldest wants to wear Converse with skulls on them with her black Homecoming dress, hey that's up to her. She had glow in the dark neon green and pink hair last year. I signed off for her to get a very tasteful tattoo at 16. I'm the one all the kids confide in, call when there's a problem or just run up to in the hall and hug. Maybe because I'm younger they think I understand/can relate better?

[KnittingOwl]

3 hours ago, nomoxian said:

33 here and SAME. Ever try chocolate cereal with chocolate milk? Mmmmm!

That's why I always loved Cocoa Puffs!  It left chocolate milk in the bowl and then I got to drink it at the end.  

[Iokaste]

42 minutes ago, SuffolkNWhat said:

(...)

Cant speak for other countries but in the UK this is not common, our dating scan is at 12-13 weeks along with prenatal testing for chromosome markers. We don't get another scan until 20-23 weeks for a more detailed health check on the baby (usually the time couples find out the sex if they choose to)

 

 

Also not common here in Scandinavia. 13th and 20th-22nd scans for us as well. The super early scans are only done if there is a history of miscarriages or severe birthdefects. 
If a week 8 scan is really widely recommended in the US, I would suspect it has more to do with the healthcare-for-profit-approach than actual prenatal care. 

[KeshetParparNesicha]

3 hours ago, FeministFunPolice said:

It seems reasonable to me that a couple wouldn't get pregnant immediately, especially if the woman had a history of an eating disorder, which I suspect Jinger does. 

Not to speculate or anything, but what makes you say that?

[Chewing Gum]

Probably just because she's thin. I don't find that unusual given the fact she went from carb-rich junk food to actual nutricious food. She'll bounch back at some point but it could just be the way she's build. I'm not concerned. 

[MissKnowItAll]

Congrats to the parents, they must be very happy. I feel a little sad for them because they are so young and newly married, but I bet they're over the moon.

[FunDieDumDum]

Ugh. I knew it was too much to hope that these two would consciously wait a year (they've already clearly stated that their intentions were basically to procreate immediately), but for both their sakes I had hoped it would at least take six months or so to conceive. That's still a very short time, but at least they'd have had a chance to adjust to married adult life before adding a newborn to the mix. They're just both still so young, especially Joy. And now she's got only the duration of her pregnancy to fast-forward from "kid" straight to "mom". It's sad.

*sigh* At least we've still got Jinger holding out! And I do think J&J are consciously trying to wait, but I'll post my specific thoughts on this over on their thread.

[nastyhobbitses]

5 hours ago, DillPicklePopcorn said:

Lol, thanks for that.  I appreciate the Missy Elliott rap amongst all this baby talk. 

Missy Elliott is the answer to life, the universe, and everything.

[subsaharanafrica]

1 hour ago, Iokaste said:

If a week 8 scan is really widely recommended in the US, I would suspect it has more to do with the healthcare-for-profit-approach than actual prenatal care. 

I don't think it's widely recommended in the US to have an early dating ultrasound. When I was pregnant and living in a Malaysia (recently, that child is in preschool) I had a scan at every single doctor's appointment for a whopping $18 USD a piece. Most of the people I conversed with on one of the larger pregnancy boards were shocked and the general consensus was that barring medical necessity insurance in the US would usually only pay for the 20 week scan and sometimes the 12 week scan. 

This was backed up by my own experience with pregnancy #2 in the US. At my initial appointment they asked if I wanted the 12 week scan and said they'd contact my insurance for me to see if it was covered. I did have an earlier scan than that for medical reasons and the doctor's office had to bill the insurance company for it twice. The first time it was rejected because they had it coded as being a dating ultrasound, which it wasn't. When they coded it as being medically necessary the insurance company paid for it. 

ETA: Just to clarify, I think most insurance policies do pay for the 12 week scan. 

[Jug Band Baby]

17 hours ago, Buzzard said:

My guess is that Joy will be the most extreme of all of the  brood.  Its really too bad that she was denied a childhood by her idiot parents and now she denied herself the time to enjoy her freedom by taking on the responsibility of a baby so soon.

She was also kind of in the middle.  She wasn't in the original sister-moms club with Jana, Jill, Jessa, and Jinger, but wasn't in the little girls club either.  She was adrift, and now she gets to be the most specialest of all!

[Iokaste]

1 hour ago, subsaharanafrica said:

I don't think it's widely recommended in the US to have an early dating ultrasound. When I was pregnant and living in a Malaysia (recently, that child is in preschool) I had a scan at every single doctor's appointment for a whopping $18 USD a piece. Most of the people I conversed with on one of the larger pregnancy boards were shocked and the general consensus was that barring medical necessity insurance in the US would usually only pay for the 20 week scan and sometimes the 12 week scan. 

(snip)

Thank you for sharing :-) 
I recently watched Riki Lake's birth-documentary "The Business of Beeing Born" and I'm currently willing to believe all bad things about prenatal and birthcare in the US ;-) 

[Jug Band Baby]

17 hours ago, justoneoftwo said:

I will say that often the signs at amusement parks are overly cautious.  Pregnant women are not glass and many can do most of what they would normally do.  I will say they probably didn't have a doctors opinion which is the worst part to me.  I am more shocked that they will likely not get proper prenatal care.  

A pregnant friend of mine is heeding every caution there is, and she's due in November now.  She's miserable and swearing off ever having another baby.  She's not eating hot dogs that are cold, sushi, honey, wheat, peanuts, no more sandwiches with cold lunch meat, no more eating even left-over chicken that hasn't been thoroughly re-heated (which overcooks it).  She's not doing any activity with any pregnancy warnings, and has even stopped going to any stores with warnings about "birth defects or other reproductive harm."  She already decided that all her medical decisions will be left in the hands of her doctor and she won't question it.  Her husband's not so happy about this since it's impacting his life too (he can't have any of those foods either since she's convinced she'll kill the baby just having peanut butter in the house).  Her husband is my husband's best friend, and my husband got home late one night and told me he was trying to console the guy since he was gut-sick over how he was going to be driving his wife to yet another test the next day that didn't seem to have any medical need.  No problems in a pregnancy?  Amniocentesis because the doctor says all pregnant women should have them!  It's like the doctor is planning to buy a Rolls Royce and is planning to have her insurance pay for it.

She's an extreme case of thinking pregnant women are going to break and their babies fall out of them.  No, girlfriend, we aren't made of glass.  It's really okay to have some honey in your tea.  You aren't going to make your baby get botulism.

17 hours ago, foreign fundie said:

The parents are legal adults, healthy, financially stable, in love, and this kid is really welcome. 

Almost every new relationship starts off like that.  This is a new relationship for them.  Even if they weren't married, they'd still be in what's called the honeymoon phase.  Of course they're going to be acting all in love!  Jill and Derick did it too, and I'm not convinced they even like each other now.  Let's see how super in luvs they are when it's been a couple years.

We could all say the same things about Anna and Josh too, but M5 isn't being congratulated around here.  And I doubt JillDer3 would get congrats either.  Welcome or not, these are babies that will be raised to follow in dangerous, hateful beliefs and to vote to suppress rights.  I won't even go through the motions of a begrudging congrats when every new baby is another arrow to shoot into the heart of women's and LGBT rights.

[meee]

I'm a couple of pages behind still, but I wanted to jump into the discussion on calculating due dates. It's like people have said, the first day of your missed period you're already considered 4 weeks pregnant, because most of the time you can't pinpoint ovulation/conception exactly. When you can pinpoint it exactly (such as with fertility treatments) then it gets interesting. People who get pregnant via IUI/IVF are told a "fake" LMP to tell their OB, counting back exactly two weeks before the IUI or egg retrieval, because this is how it's counted but the actual period just isn't relevant. 

[Fundie Bunny]

2 hours ago, Iokaste said:

Also not common here in Scandinavia. 13th and 20th-22nd scans for us as well. The super early scans are only done if there is a history of miscarriages or severe birthdefects. 
If a week 8 scan is really widely recommended in the US, I would suspect it has more to do with the healthcare-for-profit-approach than actual prenatal care. 

Here, with free universal healthcare, you get one ultrasound per month while pregnant. Mostly to measure the fetus and check growth

[wandering woman]

I used to enjoy following the Duggars and being outraged by their repressive, cult-like lifestyle. Joy's pregnancy is ridiculous, and I'm getting sick of all the stupidity in her family.  She is nineteen, has experienced very little of what life has to offer, and has already started creating what will, in all likelihood, be a huge family.  I am fed up. I may stop following this dysfunctional brood and just go away. The whole thing makes me sick.

[Hashtag Blessed]

6 hours ago, Snarkle Motion said:

I think Michelle is unhappy about the pregnancy. Joy is likely super fertile and starting at age 19. She has the potential to have more kids than Michelle and I think this threatens her since having a bazillion babies was Michelle's only purpose in life.

I often think of the identity crisis Michelle has likely gone through, and is probably still going through. She spent so much of her life pregnant and caring for a newborn, one right after another. It would be totally natural for her to wonder "Who am I now? Who am I if I'm not a Pregnant Woman?" I imagine she just tries to pray the bad thoughts away, but they must come flooding back when things like this happen. Joy might just outbreed her. That has to sting.

This is all rampant speculation of course. I'm not a psychologist, I just play pretend like one. Maybe she's actually totally thrilled for her teenaged daughter to be pregnant (barf) and have 20 more ASAP (BARF). Maybe there's not an ounce of jealousy there...lol ok I can't even think that with a straight face. There's no way she's not quietly burning with jealousy. 

[kachuu]

In all honesty, when I saw the post pop up on FB yesterday, I didn't even click on it. I immediately came here because I NEEDED TO KNOW WHAT FJ THOUGHT FIRST

 

[LawsonBatesEgo]

This makes me so sad.

She's just NINETEEN years old.  She should be going to college, hanging out with friends, travelling, having fun and going on dates with her boyfriend.......not pregnant. 

The poor thing never stood a chance with her horrible cult upbringing and I just feel sad for her. 

Hell, she wasn't even allowed to kiss Austin until 3 months ago and now she's already knocked up. These poor people don't even get a bit of time to just enjoy having sex for the fun of having sex before they're already pregnant.