Legacy of Home - Back, and as lugubrious as ever...

[JillsFlowerHeadband]

Something about her writing style reminds me of a gloomier Lady Lydia. I mean, if she's got chronic pain or health issues then I can't snark on that, I take care of enough people like that at work to know it's hell. But... she just seems so... sad. I don't know. Sad and low-energy even on the inside? Maybe that's the Lady Lydia part.

[Four is Enough]

Lugubrious? Think Eeyore. Always looking for the brown side....

and Good Golly, I'm 60 with a bad knee and an 18 year old (plus more) and I'm not ready for the rocking chair yet!

Oh. And Sam Eliot. Swoon.

[salex]

He wanted his wife dependent on him, which in return helped make her sweet and gentle and thankful.

Ah, yes, those prefeminist days where men wanted their wives to be wholly dependent with no other options so he could treat her however he wanted.

It is interesting that, yet again, this era is viewed through rose colored glasses.

When a housewife acts like they did in the old days, eventually it brings out the chivalry in a man. It makes him want to protect and care for her. But her actions must be genuine, and they come from years of trial and error. The good wife is motivated by her desire to do her part, without any reward. But, the reward does come.

Something went wrong, over the years, when these old time housewives stopped setting the example to the younger generation. The young people of today prefer sloth, messy homes, and co-habitation over an old fashioned home life. They find no pride in keeping a nice home. I wonder if this is because some feminist came along and whispered in their ear, that the floor does not have to be scrubbed or that it was okay for dust to accumulate. Her whispers told the wife that she deserved better and she wasn't being treated right. Feminist trickery was designed to make the wife unproductive and take away her work at home. So she would be free to run around, or get into her husband's business and try to usurp his role. I wonder if these little, subtle steps, slowly eroded the yearning for a godly family. I wonder if this breakdown started with being tricked into running off and neglecting the home.

thelegacyofhome.blogspot.com/search/label/Feminist

Oddly enough, a lot of the serious career couples I know in their 30s have immaculate homes as well, because they care. And because they can afford the household help a few hours a week that replace one of them staying home full time to vacuum. The men and women in these couples are not remotely slothful, nor are there feelings of usurped roles.

Do they never grow weary of burning this straw feminist?

But, the first bit about dependence reminded me of this.

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[salex]

We're in the midst of a glorious Texas spring -- bluebonnets and other wildflowers are starting to come out, redbuds blooming, trees leafing out everywhere, (I'm not getting into the insane pollen load, that's another story) and we're almost certainly past any possibility of even a light frost. Can't imagine what it's been like in the northeast where everyone has been pounded by relentless storms. Yes, there are winter sports to be enjoyed, but not in a blizzard.

I have some friends who lived in Maine caretaking a state park that had been a farm (near the ocean). They used to laugh about people in Maine, because no one could ever admit that they weren't busy as bees and working very hard and they tended to be somewhat taciturn as well. I'm wondering if this woman isn't just a New Englander born and bred and that comes out in her writing.

Also, looking at that house, I can only imagine what it takes to heat a drafty colonial era house through a looooong Vermont winter.

They have owned it for years... why haven't they installed proper insulation and good windows. (My parents have lived in a 1902 house since the 50s.... and just upgraded the windows for the second time in my lifetime-- it is not inexpensive, but it pays for itself in heating bills.

[anjulibai]

I haven't read the blog (link?), but I'm going to admit that my husband and I are similarly pleased with the little things in life. We hold hands and kiss and grab butts like pervy teens when we run errands without kids. I have never cared about going on actual dates (and tbh, I can only count a handful of times where I DID go on a date, married or not) but rather just enjoying some quiet time together. And as someone who has chronic pain, I can fully empathize with her lack of energy. When I'm not sick, I have "DO ALL THE THINGS" days that really tend to do me more harm than good.

iow, it's hard to snark on someone who sounds pretty much like a normal person (from where I sit).

I don't think there's nothing wrong with enjoying the simple things. I do too.

But her tone is one of someone that wants more and is not truly happy with the simple things.

[salsa]

I wonder what her health problems are? I wonder if it's MS, with her sensitivity to cold and fatigue

[keen23]

Geeez Louise...the way she writes makes me want to run outside and scream...

It's soon depressing.

She is so old before her time. That's it? All she does all winter?

My parents are in their 60's. They live in New England. They're retired. So, as a result, they went to Italy last year for 3 weeks. This year, they're going to raft the Colorado River. They travel, a lot. They garden in the spring and summer. They got quite a workout on their snowshoes this winter. They walk their dog 3-5 miles a day. They babysit my siblings' kids. They take my kids for the summer. My Dad is a minor elected official and volunteers at the hospital and his church. My Mom does yoga three times a week, runs a book club and at tax time, does probably 50 tax returns "for fun." They're more busy in their 60's than when they worked full time jobs.

[Lisa]

I haven't read the blog (link?), but I'm going to admit that my husband and I are similarly pleased with the little things in life. We hold hands and kiss and grab butts like pervy teens when we run errands without kids. I have never cared about going on actual dates (and tbh, I can only count a handful of times where I DID go on a date, married or not) but rather just enjoying some quiet time together. And as someone who has chronic pain, I can fully empathize with her lack of energy. When I'm not sick, I have "DO ALL THE THINGS" days that really tend to do me more harm than good.

iow, it's hard to snark on someone who sounds pretty much like a normal person (from where I sit).

thelegacyofhome.blogspot.ca

She is not a normal person.

[toejamflipflop]

And even so, being in your 70's doesn't have to be bad.

This is Katharine Ross, last year. She's 75. (married to Sam Elliot since 1984)

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WOW Katherine Ross is gorgeous and her look hasn't changed much. I hope I look that good at that age.

[Lisa]

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Please don't take away my FJ Card - I rather enjoy her stuff! Unless I missed something, she's just reporting on life as she knows it, shilling her book but not otherwise looking for handouts a la Los Rodrigues, nor ramming her religion throat-ward a la Maxhell.

I'd've preferred gestures of consideration and affection from a partner on car rides to everyday chores, over the grudging trips to vacation lands or 4-star restaurants where the silence was strained and the conversation curt. But that's me.

Thanks, OP, for the referral! If I read something there that causes snark, I'll be back!! Until then, I'm just kind of enjoying her Eeyore In The Simple Life vibe.

I have a lot in common with Mrs. White. My husband and I are the same age as the Whites, we live frugally, and we're homebodies. I also have health issues which make normal tasks annoying or painful from time to time (although I truly believe that Mrs. White has something very serious, MS or chronic fatigue, perhaps). The snark comes in because she homeschooled her daughters to render them unfit for college or the workplace on purpose, she insists that women should be dependent on men (and thus submissive, sweet, and grateful), and she glorifies poverty. My little family will be debt-free next month thanks to a bit of luck and deliberate choices we've made to put our money towards paying off our house. It works for us! When it comes to suffering in a cold house because supplementing Mister's income would be immoral... well, you've lost me.

[August]

They have owned it for years... why haven't they installed proper insulation and good windows. (My parents have lived in a 1902 house since the 50s.... and just upgraded the windows for the second time in my lifetime-- it is not inexpensive, but it pays for itself in heating bills.

Window 'upgrades' are a scam. Agree on the insurance, but not the windows. (disclaimer: I've never geen the person putting up/ taking down the storm windows).

[salex]

I wonder what her health problems are? I wonder if it's MS, with her sensitivity to cold and fatigue

I wondered if it was progressive-relapsing MS as well, given annual times of bedrest and her weakness/wearyness.

[keen23]

Window 'upgrades' are a scam. Agree on the insurance, but not the windows. (disclaimer: I've never geen the person putting up/ taking down the storm windows).

How are window upgrades a scam? There's a HUGE difference between 50 year old single pane windows and brand new, properly fitted double panes. HUGE.

[salex]

Window 'upgrades' are a scam. Agree on the insurance, but not the windows. (disclaimer: I've never geen the person putting up/ taking down the storm windows).

Not so sure my parents were scammed. The origional windows from 1902 were pretty loose in the frames, breezes could come in around the windows. The storms they installed in the 1960s offered both permanent screens and second glass windows on the outside that kept the breezes out in winter. That was a measurable improvement. However, 50 years later, the storm windows have lived a long life and they saw that many of the origional windows were not doing well-- after 112 years, the wood was not always in good shape, etc. So they bought a number of new, double glass windows that are easier to open, seal better than even the old storm windows etc.

Again, there were noticeable improvements on how well the windows sealed, that even adding weather stripping, etc, could never really do as well.

[Idolatry]

I'm confused by this living arrangement. She spends "every waking moment" taking care of grandkids? I guess that's a good arrangement for somebody.

[Lisa]

For what it's worth, we love our window upgrade. Our windows were installed in 1962 and rattled slightly in high winds. A few years ago we got new double-panes and the house is much cozier.

[Georgiana]

I'm the eldest in my family, and I was 10 in 1998. My mother had me at 28, so I assume this woman must be my mother's age or younger. My mother is currently training with me for a marathon.

However, my mother is also an OT with the geriatric population. She says one of the things that ages people faster than any other is having nothing to do/sitting around all day/limited stimulation. People who have a job, hobbies, volunteer work, anything to challenge their minds/bodies and keep them busy stay sharper and healthier longer than those who do nothing. If all she does is sit around and occasionally care for grandkids, that is going to age her fast. She needs to get out into the world, do things, and interact with adults in a social setting.

Poor thing. She sounds very depressed.

[Lisa]

I have to give Mrs. White some credit; she does seem to be a pretty successful homeschooler, despite...

1. We did not keep track of credits earned in each subject. In my school, there was no such thing as 4 credits of English, 4 credits of Math, etc. We simply never bothered. Frankly, I never imagined my girls were going to college in the first place. My plan was for them to finish their education with me, and hopefully, marry and become homemakers like their Mother. I also knew about the GED. I knew they could get into college after earning a GED. So I was never worried.

I'm glad one daughter did get into cosmetology school, but this is not an attitude that fosters lots of options.

[Idolatry]

Wow. This blog is just sad. Scraping by with $32 for groceries (May 3 2011)? Why not get a part time job? I'd hire her to be my maid, as long as I didn't have to listen to her. And it's still the same in 2015, though I guess a bunch of kids live with her now.

There are a few posts that mention her favorite thing, a Freschetta pizza. That's a $5 frozen pizza, which is passable drunk. The idea of a special Freschetta treat is the saddest thing on this whole blog. I now have the sadz.

[Lisa]

Wow. This blog is just sad. Scraping by with $32 for groceries (May 3 2011)? Why not get a part time job? I'd hire her to be my maid, as long as I didn't have to listen to her. And it's still the same in 2015, though I guess a bunch of kids live with her now.

There are a few posts that mention her favorite thing, a Freschetta pizza. That's a $5 frozen pizza, which is passable drunk. The idea of a special Freschetta treat is the saddest thing on this whole blog. I now have the sadz.

Bwahahaha! It is my duty to depress you further! :twisted:

thelegacyofhome.blogspot.ca/2009/08/restaurant-style-breakfast-at-home.html

We used to have full English breakfast every Sunday as a treat when I was growing up and it was amazing. I try to eat healthier today, but even my saddest breakfast is better than an oatmeal packet left on a paper towel. :(

[salex]

I'm confused by this living arrangement. She spends "every waking moment" taking care of grandkids? I guess that's a good arrangement for somebody.

At least in the past it appears her parents lived in the first floor apartment (previously her brother lived there)

Do the adult kids live there or in one of the houses? IF she is baby sitting is it because the daughters are managing the house or are that at work , less interested in housewifery than she.

And, why oh why are they so poor. Did they not have insurance at the various times she and her husband have been hospitalized? She said they once had a store-- how did they lose money with that? and why can't they keep even one car going on a consistent basis?

Tis odd all around.

And whomever said that about the pizza... I thought she was a full time housewife.. why ever buy a frozen pizza unless you like the taste of cardboard.

[salex]

At least in the past it appears her parents lived in the first floor apartment (previously her brother lived there)

Do the adult kids live there or in one of the houses? IF she is baby sitting is it because the daughters are managing the house or are that at work , less interested in housewifery than she.

And, why oh why are they so poor. Did they not have insurance at the various times she and her husband have been hospitalized? She said they once had a store-- how did they lose money with that? and why can't they keep even one car going on a consistent basis?

Tis odd all around.

And whomever said that about the pizza... I thought she was a full time housewife.. why ever buy a frozen pizza unless you like the taste of cardboard.

Reading more of this, she talks about being home, working as a housewife, but she did have an inhouse day care and worked with her husband at their store. But I don't get the frozen pizza, brownie mix and cake mix references--usually cooking from scratch goes with the whole homemaker / frugal schtick.

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[Lisa]

Reading more of this, she talks about being home, working as a housewife, but she did have an inhouse day care and worked with her husband at their store. But I don't get the frozen pizza, brownie mix and cake mix references--usually cooking from scratch goes with the whole homemaker / frugal schtick.

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That's what makes Legacy of Home such an addictive blog. Mrs. White doesn't have the abrasiveness nuttiness of the Pearls, the Duggars, or the Maxwells, but there's so much mystery to her life. Why, indeed, are they so poor? Mrs. White has written a bunch of books on frugality and "living within his income" but she doesn't present any evidence that this works. Why does she spend her whole life looking after grandchildren? How many people live in that house, anyway? Why does she talk about the need for a wife to be grateful to her husband so much, if Mister can't even keep the damned house heated? For me, it's like the old Dark Shadows soap opera: slow moving, but weird enough to keep me interested.

[VodouDoll]

But her tone is one of someone that wants more and is not truly happy with the simple things.

Agreed. "I dare not dream of Dollywood because all our money has to be saved for coal," is not something a person happy with her life would write. She's sitting in her rocking chair longing for Six Flags and Disneyland and trying to convince herself she's happy.

[Howl]

Wonder what her health insurance situation is. Does not sound like she is quite old enough for MediCare (65). Sounds like she may be poor enough for MediCaid or, if sick enough, social security disability.

The pictures of the "estate" are quite lovely, at least in summer. A river runs though it!